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Do you know what it feels like to be left behind?
Losing everyone around you in such little time.
I try not to worry since they're left in the past,
But it's hard going through life knowing nothing ever lasts.
It's hard to hide behind this frown,
When on the inside you're on the verge of a breakdown.
I've lost everyone that meant the world to me.
All I have left of them are these memories.
You have no idea how badly I want them back.
But they've left me in the past which was their plan of attack.
The pain of losing them will never go away.
I'm tired of feeling like this every day.
I feel like I no longer belong.
I fake my happiness to show nothing's wrong.
By Melanie. S
Faith POV:-
I was still in the past recalling those two horrible night's that changed my life. I was zoned out when Max shook me to bring me back in the present.
"Faith, I want to know who is this girl you are talking about; was she your sister?" Said, Max
"Kind of," I said.
"First thing, I really want to know about your past. I won't force you. And second, If you're going to tell me then tell me only if you trust me." said Max
I felt like opening myself up now. I have been bearing this past for five years. I felt like opening up to Max would make me feel a little bit of relief. After so long time I'm keeping a trust. So I nodded in response and began my past story.
Five years before
Faith POV:-
"Mommy! Where are my books? I need to pack them then only I can pack my other stuff" I screamed from my room.
"It's on the kitchen table babe, last night you were showing Grace something," mommy said in loud from the kitchen.
OH yeah, right, I was showing my five years old sister Grace my new literature books last night. I turned back to go get my books but my sister came running in my room carrying my books in her small hands. She is so adorable. Though she's not my real sister I love her like my own blood. She kept the books on my bed.
"Thank you Grace," I said with love. She was playing with her fingers and she was looking constantly at me, I understood she wanted to tell me something so I got down on my knees to her level. I took her small hands in my hand to stop her twiddling.
"What," I asked her
"Can I come with you, please, I want to be with you." She said in her pleading tone.
"Aww, Grace I wish I could take you with me. But I can't honey. Cause that's the hostel rules honey. But I promise I'll come to see you and once I finish my studies we'll get settle and then even mommy doesn't have to work and you can go to a better school" I said to make her understand the condition of our family. I knew she understood that our life was different and that different was not a good one. She has seen a lot worse side of the world in her small age. I was studying and working hard just so that we can live a better life or a life with some respect. I was moving tomorrow to California for my literature studies thanks to my scholarship. I even loved my Mom but not her occupation. She too made sure I won't become like her but she could only afford one child education expense so I promised myself to get educated and change their living. And make sure Mom doesn't have to sell her body for money. I was living and working hard just for them. My small family was not perfect but I made sure I make it one day. I was doing this just for them.
We were having our dinner quietly. When my mom said.
" Done with your packing?"
"Yes," I said
"What time is your bus?" Mom asked
"Mrng six thirty I'll reach there in 8 hours," I said.
"We'll come to drop you, right Grace?" said mom looking at Grace.
"Yes," said Grace in joy. I smiled at them.
"Be safe over there, don't forget we love you. You can leave it and come back if you face any trouble over there. We'd rather choose you over a nice future." Said mom getting a bit emotional. I smiled and nodded. She was looking at me and she suddenly smiled and gave a small laugh. What was she thinking, I thought? Even Grace was confused.
"I'm sorry for these words, but I don't remember which good and handsome man I slept with and he gave me you. Faith, be careful over there with boy's and even if you fall in love don't fall in love with the wrong guy." She began parsing me and ended up warning. I just gave a laugh.
The next day morning my mom and my sister came to drop me at the bus stop. We said our goodbyes. And I took my place by bus. And my journey began.
California
Faith POV:-
I reached California in eight hours. I was standing at my hostel Gate with my bags. The hostel was average in looks. Good for me though and pocket-friendly. I picked up my bag and started walking in. I got near the inquiry table, there was an old lady sitting behind it. She must be in her 70's I thought. She smiled at me and asked.
"Yes, how can I help you"
" Hi! I'm Faith I have booked a room over here" I said
I heard the sound of a car stopping near gates. I could see it from the table. I saw out and there was a black limousine. Sure it has lost his way. But the doors open and a girl stepped out of it. The driver was talking out her luggage. She said thank-you to him. She went on the order side of the car someone else too got out of the car. But I couldn't see who it was. She hugged that person and waved bye. She was entering inside. Is she really going to stay here I thought? She came near and stopped beside me. I turned to look at the old lady. She was already holding my room keys and waiting for me.
"Oh, I'm sorry," I said, weird, I think she caught me looking at the girl.
"Hi, I'm Viviana Drago I have booked a room here," she said.
She sounded happy but the thing which was eating me was why is she staying here, I mean she just got down from a limo. Okay, forget it Faith let her live her life my inner goddess said. I grabbed my bags. I saw her looking at me with a smile so I smiled back.
"Hi, you're new here? She said.
"Yes," that's all I said. Ahh, should I say something I thought so decided to ask her the same question but was interrupted by the old lady?
"I'm sorry Viviana dear I can't find the second key of your room"
the old lady said
"Okay, then give me the first one," said Viviana and gave a smirk
"Faith has the first key," said the old lady. Is she talking about me?
"Who's Faith?" asked Viviana. The old lady looked at me. Okay right! She was talking about me. So I gave a nod and said.
"Yeap that's me"
"Really! Great! So you are my roommate...Hi I'm Viviana Drago and you are?" she said in excitement.
"I'm Faith Rowan," I said.
We started walking to our room. She seemed so happy. Her presence gave me comfort which was strange. Maybe because of her frank behavior. Should I say that we are friends now? OH gross how can you befriend with a rich girl? They always find you disgusting. She'll probably start hating me once she finds the real background of my family I thought. I opened the door of our room which was big, three people could easily settle here I thought it was much bigger than my bedroom. There were two beds' and two windows behind them there were two study tables and two big cupboards. I turned to look at Vivian and she still seems happy. What is wrong with her. Is her face stuck in that happy expression?
"Perfecto," she said. Which I didn't understand.
"I'll take the right side if you don't mind," she said.
"Not at all, I'm fine with it," I said. And walked to the left side I started unpacking and settling myself. Viviana was doing the same with her headphones on she was singing now. It didn't bother me much because her voice was sweet. She was now singing fly by II of the Blue band. Which was my favorite song too? And my mouth couldn't stop itself so I joined her. She saw me singing too. The unpacking was done with some singing. We started talking about our favorite songs and things. We got pretty close in this short time. she wasn't like the other rich girls. I finally asked her.
"Why are you so happy, like from the time I have seen you, that smile from your face hasn't been down even for a second. I know that's a stupid question but I just felt it weird and curious to know the reason"
"Ummm. Faith, dear you have no idea from what thing I'm away from and that is giving me so much pleasure and happiness." She said looking up and exhaling like taking a breath of relief.
"Why does it sound like there's a big secret," I said feeling suspicious about her.
"Umm, there is but first tell me about your life," she asked me. My life about which I am ashamed and running and trying to improve it. I can't tell her she'll start hating me I thought. So I lied.
"I used to live in Phoenix and I was the only child of my mom and my mom died when I was ten. I have been raised by my aunt Matilda in Pennsylvania and that's that" I ended my story short and in the end, I gave a pitiful smile. But she didn't look convinced. Looking at her face I knew she didn't buy my story. But I was going to stick with it so I don't get bullied.
"First thing, I know your lying and second I know because it's not good to trust a person you have just met or maybe you think I'll judge you and third I don't judge people by their status, looks or past cause whatever I know mine is more worst then your" she said that and gave a smile to comfort me.
"Goodnight Faith we have our first day tomorrow," she said and we got on our beds.
"Goodnight Viviana," I said and laid on my bed switching off the lights and thrilled by Viviana catching my lie.
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