This isn't Happening!
by
DrPhantasy
"Now I know why I can't be a drunken fool, or at least not on a regular basis" Miranda thought to herself as her head felt like splitting open at any moment, while starting to regaining full consciousness.
Miranda had awoken just a few moments earlier, at first she didn't notice anything, as most don't when they wake up, but it only took her about five seconds to notice the first red flag afterwards.
As she tried to move around the bed, she stumbled with something blocking her way to the right side of the bed, she lifted the sheet, only to find what that obstacle was, a guy sleeping next to her!
She instinctively got away from him, only to fall from the bed into the ground, at which point she came to her second red flag.
"This isn't my bedroom" she said whispering, this bed was significantly smaller than her King sized bed.
Confusion was already showing in her face as she continued lying there, sitting on the floor, and then it came the third and most frightening of the red flags, up until that moment, everything in her head was a blur, she had no idea where she was, nor how she got there, so many thoughts went through her head, all at the same time, struggling each one to take priority in her train of thought, but the last flag kicked the rest out of the competition.
"Where are my clothes?" She thought to herself while staring down the sheet that had been covering her body up until that moment.
"What the hell happened last night?" that one, of course, was fairly obvious to her at this point, but being obvious is not the same as being acceptable.
"This isn't happening! Miranda, what the hell did you do?" She said to herself while patting her head with one hand while getting up and holding the sheet with the other.
"Miranda, calm yourself!" She thought "what's done it's done, just try to calm the hell down, and get out of this mess!"
She started looking frantically everywhere, looking for her clothes, sure enough, her dress was just a few feet away from the bed, along one of her shoes.
"Nicely done Miranda" she thought "keep listening to Rebecca"
She ran as quietly as she could manage to get her dress, and started to look for the other shoe, much to her dismay, the shoe was nowhere to be seen.
"I don't have time for this!"
She concluded that getting dressed should be her next step, so she started walking around the place looking for the bathroom, she spotted two doors, both looking pretty much alike, she hesitated as to which one to try first, but time was of the essence, she needed to leave as soon as possible, specially before her new "bedfellow" awoke, so she tried the first door.
Big mistake.
As soon as she opened the door, she caught the attention of two guys sitting on a kitchen counter, apparently eating cereal.
Both looked at her with dumbfounded looks on their faces, one of them even halted the spoon halfway to his mouth.
"Where is the bathroom?" She asked with a little whisper as she closed the door just enough so only her face would show.
"Next door over" said the one who looked the less confused.
"Thanks" she said in the same whispering tone before closing the door completely.
She felt like throwing herself off the window.
She hurried next door and locked herself in, while leaning against the door, struggling not to hyperventilate.
A few moments later, once she had reassured herself it was no big deal, she dropped the sheet that had been her only line of defense so far, and stared at the dress, that twenty five thousand dollars red strapless dress that she fell in love with, the moment she first laid eyes on it, she didn't usually wore things that provocative, but that dress was a beauty to behold, and she was mesmerized by it, so much that her two best friends, Rebecca and Michelle noticed.
"Excellent choice" whispered Rebecca in her ear, while standing right behind her, which yanked her out of dreamland.
"I was just looking at it" she replied "but I'm not buying it"
"Nonsense" she screeched "That dress is perfect for you, you should totally get it"
"No, I won't" she said firmly.
"Okay, now, I will pull out my bitch-friend card, and get it for you, whether you want it or not" she said, with a devilish smile across her perfect face.
"I've never worn something like that, and I don't plan to, anytime soon"
"And that's precisely why you should get it" said Michelle, cutting in before Miranda could say anything more.
Miranda looked at them both for a few seconds.
"Fine" She said, finally surrendering, thinking that she could buy it and leave it on the bottom of her closet to collect dust until the end of time, she figured that her friends would have forgotten all about it in a matter of days.
Needless to say, that was a wishful, foolish thought on her part.
"I'm going to burn this thing when I get home" she said to herself.
She got dressed as fast as humanly possible, and once she was done, took a look at the bathroom mirror, and what she saw, she could not recognize.
She looked nothing like her usual self, her hair was in an undecipherable mess, her make-up, Rebecca's doing, was all ruined, she figured any attempt to clean it, without proper tools would only make it worse, so she only soaked her hair in the shower and headed out, she was never the kind of girl that sneaked out from home while growing up, but she did a remarkable job right then and there, or so she thought, because the guy on the bed was still sleeping soundly.
"Okay, phase one completed, now phase two, where the hell is my purse?"
The room was not particularly messy, but she could not find her purse at first glance, nonetheless, she wasn't leaving without it, so the search continued.
She found both missing items at almost the same spot, where most things end up after a night of drunken debauchery.
Under the bed.
"Great, as if this wasn't humiliating enough, now I have to crawl"
She crawled under and got her stuff as fast as she could.
Once she did, she got from under the bed, but rose slowly, like if the guy sleeping there were a sound sensitive mine, she only took a glimpse at him, still lying there.
She, for the life of her, couldn't remember him at all, the last thing she remembered was Rebecca and Michelle pushing tequila shots down her throat, after that everything else became a big blur.
She stopped to get a good look at him, he was tall, even in the bed she could tell that much, fair skin and chocolate blond hair, he looked very young, at least younger than she was, his body was very muscular, she could tell by the way the muscles in his back are showing despite being unconscious.
"I guess I could have done worse" she thought, admiring his unknown partner.
But a light movement on his part ended the admiring session, he didn't wake up, merely moved, but that was enough, she wouldn't risk another awkward situation, she still had one waiting outside the door with the guy's friends, unlike him, they were wide awake, and would not be possible to walk past them unseen, so she knew that an awkward moment would be unavoidable.
She put her shoes on and stopped on the door for a second, reached for her phone, and dialed a number.
"Miss Miranda?"
"Good morning James"
"Your father was worried for you, he's been calling you all morning"
"I figured he would, tell him I'm Okay"
"Where are you?"
"That's the thing, I need a ride home"
"Sure thing Miss, where are you, I'll go pick up up"
She suddenly noticed that she had no idea, and only one way to find out.
"James, let me call you back" and she hung up before he could reply.
She poked her head out the door.
"Umm guys?" She said quietly.
She didn't even need to say that, both guys were apparently waiting for her to come out, as they both smiled stupidly at her.
"Good morning" they said at the same time.
"Morning" she replied while blushing "can you guys help me?"
"Sure, just name it"
"Umm...can you guys tell me, where exactly am I?"
They both looked at each other, and then returned their sights at her.
"You're in Brooklyn babe" said the smaller of the two, struggling not to burst into laughter while answering "the corner of Penn St and Marcy Ave., to be precise"
Miranda felt her rage going up, she was no "babe" and even if she were, certainly not any of theirs, but decided that it was just not worth it to explode, those guys had plenty good a reason to laugh, she would be laughing herself, she saw Rebecca and Michelle getting back from their walks of shame before, and she had a blast mocking them, now that she was the subject of the mockery, she had no moral ground to stand on to feel offended, besides, she was sure she wouldn't see them ever again, ever, and she could risk waking the guy on the bed, and that could only add up to her shame, if such a thing was at all possible.
"Ummm thanks" she said, and closed the door again.
She dialed James's number again
"James, meet me at the corner of Penn St and Marcy Ave. in Brooklyn" she ordered.
He remained silent for a few seconds
"How did you end up in Brooklyn miss?
"not right now James, let's talk about it later, please" she asked.
James had been working for her father for as long as she could recall, he saw her grow up from infancy, and due to that she saw him as somewhat of a father figure, thus permitting him to pry like a parent would.
"I know the place, i'm actually nearby, be there in ten minutes"
"Oh and James, one more thing"
"What is it, Miss Miranda?"
"My dad can never know a thing about this"
"O...Okay" James sounded unsure, but he knew her well enough not to ask further.
"Thank you, see you soon, bye"
Miranda took a gasp of air, to enter into character of sorts, and opened the door for the last time.
As soon as she stepped out, her bedfellow's roommates locked eyes on her.
"Bye boys" she said with a smile, like she couldn't care less about the situation, while dying of shame inside.
"Bye" they both said, waving a hand at her, not that she noticed, because she was out the door before their hands finished raising.
"Where's josh?" Adam asked.
"No clue, but I think he didn't even get to say goodbye" Joel snorted.
"Let's go get him, judging by what I saw, that moron maybe doesn't even remember her face by now" Adam jested.
And they both ran inside Josh's room.
"Wake up you idiot!" Adam screamed in his ear.
Josh, surely enough, woke up startled "what's the matter with you?, you want to get beaten this early?"
"She's gonna get away dude, you better run if you wanna get her digits at least"
"Wait...what?"
"The goddess that just left your room bro"
Josh remained oblivious for a few more seconds, before the memories came back to him in a rush, his eyes widened all of a sudden "Where is she?" he asked.
"She headed out a few minutes ago, better hurry!"
He jumped out of bed wearing only his boxers, ran to his closed and took the first pair of pants and shirt he came across.
Adam and Joel went to the window to look for her.
"Bro! A Limousine just parked, I think that's her ride!
Josh hurried at the window and got to see the Limousine come to a halt.
"Wait!" He shouted, loud enough to make her turn her head "I'll be right down, please wait a second!" And he ran to the door, opening it and disappearing afterwards.
James watched the whole scene, as he was opening the door for her.
"Miss Miranda, should I wait?" He asked.
"Why would you?" She replied "get me out of here before something else happens"
"Right away Miss" he said while closing the door.
Josh got to the street in time to knock on her window a few times, but got no reply, and a second later the car took off, he chased it until he was just a little point in the Limousine's rear mirror, leaving him there, standing on the middle of the street.
Miranda didn't even bother to look back, as far as she was concerned, the night before, and that morning, never happened.