2
After nearly two decades of friendship you would think that you knew somebody but apparently that is not always the case. It has been a week since my once best friend robbed me and I'm over it. To avoid being outed for being the idiot I am I had to replace the money with my own, avoiding the long lecture I would have received had I told my mother what had happened. As a way to put it all behind me I took extra steps to make sure that I never ran into August again, the new route I took made sure that would would not be crossing paths. The hate that I had harbored for years just intensified after the situation and reminded me of why we had left each other on such bad terms and why it made more sense to keep it that way, we were no good for each other and it was important for me to stay far away from him. If I was to see him I would probably black out and try to stab him or some other idiotic approach to getting even. Any hope of letting go of the past hatred I held for him was gone.
Or so I thought.
As I made my way to my section of the apartment building I heard the sniffles of someone who sounded as though they were crying. My big heart always seemed to get me in trouble, being the over caring person I am I of course went to investigate it. Surprisingly, the sound was surfacing from outside of my apartment. To my dismay it was August, which automatically enraged me. As soon as he saw me he hurriedly whipped away his tears as if I wouldn't notice them. The anger that I thought would be there when I was faced with August again quickly vanished as I saw those tears. Memories of our last tearful interaction flashed in my mind and I could not help but to offer him kindness.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, still trying to hold up my angry demeanor.
"I came to see you." He answered.
"You mean you came by to steal some more right?" I spat. "How'd you even get up here?"
"The door was unlocked. And no I ain't come to still from you, I'm sorry about that, I'm running low on funds."
"So you steal from someone who was just trying to help you. After all we been through August, really?" I made a point to emphasize the word all, dragging out each L so he'd get the point.
"The struggles real. I ain't come here to argue with you. I came because I need someone to talk to."
"After pulling that stunt you really think I wanna talk to you? I don't even wanna see your face to be honest. Know I'm the stupid one for trusting you in my house but I thought after reaching out a helping hand I wouldn't be thanked by that,"
"I said I was sorry." He growled in frustration. Taking off his glasses, reviling his puffy eyes. As soon as I seen his red tear stained face there was no way I could continue to be upset.
"You've been crying?" I asked as if I wasn't already aware, sympathy was in my tone.He nodded. Sadly the nice girl in me couldn't turn him away. In all my years of knowing August I think I saw him cry once, the day I left.
"Give me my money back and we can talk." He gave me a you serious look before reluctantly pulling the money out of his pocket and giving it to me. August knew that had he asked me for the money I would have given it to him. I would have given him anything he had asked for because I was in love with him and always had been. He took the money because he knew it would hurt me, he knew that being robbed by my best friend. He wanted to hurt me how I hurt him and he did.
"So why were you crying?" I asked.
Asking this caused his whole face to drop. "Kev died. They kilt 'em." He looked up at me, his voice cracking, clearly on the verge of tears once more. I had no intentions of letting August in, I had no intentions on ever communicating with him again, but seeing him like, seeing him so broken, I could not just leave him out here like this. I was too soft, and so damn dumb when it came to that man. I unlocked the door and stepped aside so the both of us could walk in.
I personally knew Kev. The two of us spent two years at the same high school. He dated a friend of mine and I even had a slight crush on him at one point of life. My relationship with Kev took a sharp turn when he pulled August in to the game. I began to hate Kev, there was a point in time where I blamed him for everything the went wrong between me August and a time where I may have even wished he was dead. It was senior year when the two of them first got together and it was clear that they were no good together. Kev was living the life many dreamed of, fast cars, nice clothes, any girl he could dream of and, just like any other dumb teenage boy, August wanted that same life. Kev put August on and before I knew it that same goofy kid that I knew had rose to the top of the drug game and forgot all about me. His life was consumed by the face pace life of the streets and their was no tuning back. Everyone knows that there is only one way to get out of the game and that's in a cell or a casket, for Kev it was a casket and the fear of what would be August's fate drove us apart. Regardless of my personal feelings towards Kev I knew that the two were incredible. Kev's house is where August had been spending most of his time since he got kicked out. Kev's kids were August's godchildren and he looked at them as if they were his own. You would think that the two had known each other their whole life the way they acted. So I knew that this death was killing him inside. At a lost for words I just sat with him and let him vent to me about how Kev was one of the last real niggas in Nola and how they had all these plans for the future. He told me that the two were planning to leave the game behind and that he was going to help August break into the music world and the two were going to take over the world. All the same dreams he had shared with me before, he felt like they had all been ripped away from him.
"You know I understand the pain August." I said, referring to my father who had died as a result of him not being able to leave the street life behind."If you want I can make you something to eat. Don't touch anything though, I got my eyes on you." I warned, half joking, raising from the bed but I was soon stopped.
"Thanks ma. I really appreciate it." He stopped me from getting up but grabbing my arm.
"It's no big deal."
"Yea it is." He replied. I could tell he was sincere from looking in his eyes. "You really beautiful."
"Thanks." I replied, shyly looking away from him. Was he flirting with me? After stealing from me? The male species is truly confusing. He always had a way of making me mad then being able to make me blush within seconds.
"Don't look away." He said. Taking my chin is his hand and making me stare into his eyes. At this point his lips were just centimeters apart. I opened my mouth to speak but got cut off by his lips lightly brushing against mine. I was slight caught off guard, yet when he attempted to deepen the light kiss I didn't resist. We had never kissed before. We had always stated that we were simply friends and nothing more. But right now, in this moment, I could not bring myself to pull away. At that moment I wanted him more than anything. I don't know if it was years of pent up sexual frustration or the fact that I had always secretly been in love with him but the moment felt so right.
Wrapping my arms around his neck as he laid me on the bed. He kissed down my neck as he began to remove my oversized button down. Once I was bare he began to tease me. Kissing up my legs, to my thighs, eventually placing a kiss on the place that wanted it most. I had waited for this moment for so long. "Shit," I called out when his speed increased. He was slurping, licking, and nibbling in all the right ways and I was about to surrender. "I'm bouta cum!" I cried. He didn't listen though. Maintaining his actions. I released all over his face, he licked it up no problem. Positioning himself at my entrance once he had done so.
"You ready?" He asked. I nodded my head in assurance and he slowly slid in. Taking slow deep strokes. I bite my lip, waiting for the pain to turn into pleasure.
"Faster." I called out. He obeyed, speeding up the pace. "Right there. Shit August!" I yelled, pleasure taking over my body. "Damn you tight." He commented as he continued to slam into my body.
"August Imma-" I got cut of by the wave of pleasure that flew through my body. His pace increased and I knew his climax was close as well."Shit." He spat, releasing into the rubber. After a few more strokes he collapsed next to me. Both of us left sweating and panting.
"I don't forgive you." I whispered against his chest. "I don't forgive you either." He replied.
"Ma! Ma!" August yelled snapping me from my trance. It seems like every since he returned to my life I could not help but find myself drift away as I remembered all the times that we had shared . "Huh? August you gotta go." I quickly realized that the dirty thoughts that just crossed my mind could never happen in reality.
"Why?"
"Because I said so. I'll get you some food but after that you gotta go." I said as I got up.
"You for real? I thought everything was going good what happened?"
"If you wouldn't have stole from me you would've been welcomed to stay as long as you wanted." I said, walking out of the room.
"You really something Adira." He called out after me.
"I get that a lot." I yelled from the kitchen. August followed close behind me as I proceeded to gather a light snack for him.
"Here." I stated before placing the sandwich on the counter for him.
After he ate we made our way to the living room. The two of us just lounged around talking about the weirdest things. I completely forgot about my daydream along with the fact that I had kicked him out. If it wasn't for my quick glance at the clock I would've forgotten the deal I made with myself.
"It's getting late August. I think you should get going." I said. Getting up from the couch, stretching out my arms as I did so. He rose from the couch behind me.
"You really gon kick me out Adira?"
"Why should I let you stay?" I questioned.
"Because, I need you right now." He answered, eyes watery. August is a good liar. Nevertheless, I was never able to resist a puppy eyed August, even after four years those eyes still had control of me. Once again, being the idiot that I am, I offered my couch to the same man that had just showed me why he was undeserving of it. "Fine, but you gotta sleep in my room."
"Cool me me." He smirked, dirty thoughts already flooding his mind, grabbing onto my waist. There's no denying that Augusts hands sent tingles to the spots they touched, but I wasn't about to let the slight spark get the best of me.
"On the floor, and if I hear even a floorboard creak I'm kicking you out. Understood?"
"I gotchu." His hands lowered to my ass he pulled me closer.
"No funny business either. Hands off." I commended swatting them away.
Night changed to day and I awoke to see August who had managed to break the hands off rule. I wasn't upset about it though. Something about waking up in his arms made sense, but then again I knew that we could never be more than friends. Matter of fact, we could barely handle being friends.
I knew only one person could give me some solid advice about how to handle this predicament so I called her. Explaining everything from my encounter with King in the alley to how August laid it down to waking up in his arms this morning.
"August is back in your life!" She shouted into the phone.
"No, well kinda, yeah" I sighed, "You know I'm a sucker for a sad story, I'm telling you Shanicee if you would've saw him you would've done the same thing."
"Adira I'm serious right now," I threw my head back in annoyance. I knew that her being serious was key for Im about to give you a long as lecture about how your fucking up your life and you are going to listen because I'm your best friend and know what's best for you. "Remember how upset you were when all that shit went down with yall before. Remember how much you swore up and down you hated him. Remember how for weeks you cried because of him, all the shit he put you through Adira. He's no good for you you need to cut him off before you end up in the same shit."
"I missed him. We were best friends." I pled, trying to convince her that this time wouldn't be like the last. " He's like family."
" He was like family Adira, before everything that happened. Do I need to remind you?"
"No. Please don't."
"Look A, I know you guys history but the first thing he did when he came back in your life was steal from you. He's still the same guy and you're gonna get your heart broken all over again."
Whatever Shanicee. I'll talk to you whenever." I said, fed up with this conversation. I knew everything she was saying was right. August had always had a hold on me. Even when we were 10 he could convince me to give him my cookie in my lunch box just with a couple seconds of whining. I knew that him returning to my life would be nothing but trouble. I knew I'd end up heartbroken all over again. I knew she was right, but I didn't care. I missed my other half. I was willing to risk everything in attempt to get our friendship back. Even if risking everything really did mean everything.