I thought that it was time for Dylan and Ashley to meet for once. I’ve told each other about the other but they’ve never really met. So I was very anxious. I didn’t know if Dylan would be jealous of Ashley or if Ashley would think that Dylan was spending too much time with me or something and trying to steal me maybe.
I walked with Dylan to Ash’s house. It was cold outside and all we were dressed in was skinnies and sweatshirts. Mine was so warm so I was completely warm, but Dylan had a different story. His sweatshirt was just for showing off. That thing was as thin a freaking piece of paper. Sure, it looked cooled with the skulls and dragons but it wasn’t worth it. Especially since it was around thirty degrees outside. I laughed as I watched him shiver and tense up.
“So. How are you doing there?” I tried to keep a straight face while asking.
“I-I’m doing j-just f-fine, Andy.” he growled.
“Oh! Someone’s angry!” I said while we walked side by side, not looking at each other.
“W-Well I’m f-fucking c-cold!” he complained.
“Well, maybe you should’ve worn an actual jacket or something.” He punched me in the shoulder.
“W-Whatever, let’s just g-get to Ashley’s house before I get c-cranky.” he snapped.
“Too late for that.” I muttered. I’m guessing he heard because he just glared at me.
We finally got to Ash’s house. I knocked on the door only to see Tora. She smiled and hugged me.
“Hi, Andy!” she excitedly squealed.
“Hi, Tora.”
“Who’s this?” she pointed at Dylan. She’s so nosy.
“That’s Dylan, my best friend.” she gave him a warm smile.
“He’s kinda cute.” she told me. He blushed.
“Awe, thanks.” She let us in and I saw Ash. I immediately ran to him and hugged him around his neck. It was so nice seeing him again after our conversation the other night.
“I missed you so much.” I told him. He laughed and hugged me back after a few seconds. I think I caught him off guard.
“I missed you too. It seems like forever since I last saw you.” We let each other go, but I didn’t want him to let me go. I wanted to be in his arms forever.
I looked behind me to see Tora smiling, obviously, and Dylan awkwardly standing next to her just like I was the last time I was here.
“That’s Dylan.” I pointed at him and he walked up to Ash and shook his hand. Awkward. It was like they’ve never heard of each other before or something.
“Andy talks about you a lot.” He said. Ash gave and awkward laugh and nodded.
“Oh well, he certainly talks about you a lot, too.” What a lie. Dylan looked at me for some help, but I just gestured him to start a conversation.
“I bet you two have a lot more in common than you think.” I said. Then I walked over to Tora.
“Hey, Tora. Can I talk to you?” I whispered. She nodded and we walked into the living room leaving Ashley and Dylan alone in the kitchen. He was on his own now.
We sat next to each other and she hugged a pillow.
“So?” she was evidently very curious.
“Do you think that I’m spending enough time with Ashley?” I whispered. She immediately nodded.
“Yeah. Why don’t you think so?”
“I haven’t been spending much time with him and it’s starting to worry me. Couples at my school are making out all the time and holding hands and always together when Ash and I only see each other on weekends or at night. We’re not as close as them.” She sighed and thought for a second.
“Well other couples aren’t secretly gay and go to different schools, are they?” I slowly shook my head. She had a point. Maybe I just need to stop overreacting over all of this stuff.
“I guess you’re right.” she nodded.
“Just try to spend as much time as you can with him. Trust me, he isn’t just gonna let go of you that easily! He really loves you, but I think that you should hear it from him instead.” I nodded. It would be nice to hear that from him if he’s as in love with me as Tora says he is.
“Maybe you should go and spend some time with him.” I nodded and walked over to Ashley and Dylan. They looked like they were getting along just fine. They looked up at me and smiled.
“Hey, Andy.” Dylan greeted.
“Hi.” I quickly said and then looked at Ash.
“Can we talk in private?” I asked him. He nodded. “You can go and talk with Tora, Dylan.” He nodded, too, and sat next to her on the couch.
“Let me go and get my jacket and we can go for a walk.”
“Okay.” I said and then I walked over to the door and waited for him. He walked back down with a black sweatshirt on that fit him well. Of course! Why would a teenager be wearing anything other than a sweatshirt? He took my hand and opened the door. I was anxious.
“Uh. Are you sure that you want to go out in public with us holding hands?” I asked.
“It’s okay, Andy. I was going to bring you through the path in the woods. I always take walks in the woods.”
“.....Oh.” We walked into his back yard and then into a small pathway that was practically hidden by the trees. He moved some twigs over and we walked onto the path.
“So, what did you want to talk about?” he nonchalantly asked me. I shrugged.
“I just don’t think that we spend enough time together. I just don’t want you to break up with me because I don’t spend enough time with you or something.” He put his arm around my waist.
“Oh, Andy. You paranoid freak.” he laughed. “I wouldn’t leave you because I thought you were boring. I’m usually the boring one in the relationship. And not spending all of my time with you just makes me love it even more when we actually get to see each other.” I smiled.
“Really?”
“Yeah.” He held my shoulders and stared into my eyes. “You have beautiful eyes, Andy.” he told me. I couldn’t help but blush. “I love you, Andy.” he softly spoke. Then he lifted my chin and leaned in and passionately kissed me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and I never wanted to let him go. I wanted everyday to be like this. I wanted to come home to him and just kiss him. I’m such a girl.
Then our lips parted and I hugged him.
“I love you so much, Ash. I love you so much.” He chuckled and kissed me again.
“I know you do and I love you just as much.”
“Oh, really?” he nodded.
“Uh-huh.” I kept my arms around his neck as he wrapped his arms around my waist and brought me close to him.
“I wouldn’t leave you, Andy. I love you too much. I know what it’s like to be hurt like that. To be in love and to be heart broken. I’m eighteen, after all, and I wouldn’t want you to be so paranoid like me when it comes to relationships.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“I was....” He shook his head. “Never mind.”
“No. You can tell me.” I told him. He hesitated.
“I was....I was in love with this guy a few years ago and he cheated on me and it broke my heart. I don’t know why he did it, though. Ever since then everyone’s just cheated on me or left. I haven’t told someone else that I’ve loved them in a long time. So I don’t know why I’m saying it to you so early in the relationship.”
I didn’t know how to feel about that. I wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. I was glad that he would tell me that he loved me so early because I know he means it now, but I don’t want to break his heart because he’s clearly fragile. I wouldn’t want to be the cause of a broken heart. I’ve never been the cause of someone’s broken heart. It was always me who was left broken hearted. I never got to tell the boys how I really felt about them. I couldn’t be honest. I had to hide my emotions and in the end it left me feeling so alone, so depressed and sad. I felt like no one would ever love me because I was being rejected. Not on purpose, obviously, because they didn’t know I had a crush on them, but I think that’s what made it hurt the most. Knowing that I wouldn’t even have a chance.
“Ash. I would never want to break your heart. You’re so fragile. I wouldn’t want you to feel that way again because I love you and I’m the one who’s supposed to brighten up your day. Who’s supposed to make you smile when you’re feeling your worst.” He smiled and kissed me on the cheek.
“You’re pretty smart for a sixteen year old, ya know?” I nodded.
“I know.”
“And you really understand me.”
“You understand me, too.” We started walking again, hand in hand.
“Thank you, Ash.
“For what?”
“For loving me.” He gave me a bright smile.