nevermind + poetry.

By http-livv

4.4K 490 83

in which i write poems about love and growing up and everything that comes in between More

intro.
unsafe.
the girl who was okay.
midnight thoughts in the middle of the day.
a girl called savannah.
chalk outlines in pink and blue.
safe at home.
the law between her legs.
the little girl who cried 'wolf.'
gilded.
a girl who tastes of june.
a letter to savannah.
you taste like blue
storybook babies
kisses from heaven
whole
poems written like stars
who i am ( girls like me )
my saddest poem and the grouping of constellations
love
home ( my heart is sore )
storms raging in silly veins
fire, fire, fire
me- part I
autumn ( ramblings from a tired mind )
me, part II. ( confessions and being sick to my stomach )
fever switch ( who i am )
arsonist's love
from eden
a letter to you
yesterday
i am on fire
YOU.
the thing about love
you asked me why i wouldn't take you back.
i was never yours to keep
green-brown eyes make me feel blue
unrequited
seasons.
scars ( and why you should love yourself for having them )
untitled
nihilism
silly love
the poet drops the bullshit
i wish you had loved me how i loved you
cheap glances
why
dreams
limitless
solid words from flimsy people
love love love
if i painted a picture of myself
heart hope
weight
i am a gentle thing
bury me in the bathroom mirror
not crying on a sunday
a smile from across the room
small
bitter longing

painting of a woman

95 7 0
By http-livv


What is a woman,

And what do you do with her?

This is always an idea

With the paints

And the brushes

And the hands

At first you shall paint

Her delicate,

Because that is a

Woman.

But she might become

Angry, and try to rip

The canvas

In two.

You fear, and yet you begin.

You hold the brush like a

Weapon. A foreign object

To claim as your own,

To make your own.

You hold it like a sword,

Ready to conquer.

You want to paint a

Woman. You want to paint

Your woman.

You are painting a landscape

A country- filled with whatever

You desire. It is your land.

Your umbers, your blues,

Your greens, your ochres.

Your gold fields slashed with

Silver and gold.

Again and again-

And you become repetitive.

But you are a man

So you charge on,

Tool in hand,

Weapon in hand,

Army in hand.

You paint the woman

Against the wall.

She wears a turban,

A necklace of beads

Laced around her throat,

Paint out the red stains on her hands

And the rope burns on her wrists.

Discard them.

Smudge away the bruise

Under her left eye,

And camouflage the copper

Between her teeth.

You see, this is your woman

And these are but small details-

That do not belong

In your frame.

You should destroy them when you can,

And you do.

And now your woman is tan and rosy,

Dusted with glittering petals,

And the light shines off her skin

As if you are looking at her

Through water.

This is what you want.

The colors to be purified through her.

But now there is another question,

Another idea:

Do you make her a comedy

Or do you make her a martyr?

Are her hands birds or

Are they just hands?

Are her eyes just eyes

Or are they blooming flowers?

This woman that you are

Painting is your woman

And you can decide what to do with her.

You cannot, so you slice off her head

And toss it into the sky.

Call her an abstract prophesy.

But the thing is

That you want it back.

You push the clouds into her collar bones

And you try again.

Place a meal atop her head.

Balanced fruits are atop her skull,

Wrapped in fabric and strikingly vibrant.

Do not dull down these colors

These become her thoughts

Tearing through her skin

Pushing through her organs-

And now there is more questions.

Is she intelligent?

Is she afraid?

Is she barren?

Is she nothing?

Name her Eve and fear her.

Call her Adam and burn her roots.

This woman is yours

And you decide what to do with her.

What do you do with her?

But the thing is

Now your hands are far too alive.

And you say that you don't remember but you do.

You say you don't recall but you do.

And

You are not a painter.

You clutch a bottle in one fist

And a cigarette in the other.

These are your voice.

You call them your voice.

But now everything you paint

Is too real.

But now something is different-

Now she is not yours.

She is pushing through the wall.

Bruised and bloody- remember?

You do.

And you painted her this way.

But now what do you do with her?

Oh, but you forgot to paint the part

Where the silk of her robe was torn

Straight down the middle.

Her head cracked straight through

The center like a severed

Landscape.

A bit like yours.

But-

Where is the golden sunrise?

Where are the ivory birds?

And now her hands aren't hands-

And they sing,

And her eyes scream rage-

And you start to fear her.

You remember she is your wife.

What do you do with her now?

Name her crazy and she will

Shatter the frame you painted

Her into in the first place.

Leave her alone

And she will tear you in two.

Remember how you avoided the colors.

You will paint back in what you cropped out before.

This is your woman.

And yet, you ask again,

More terrified this time-

What is a woman?

She is not a work of art,

Or a fiction-

But the scary thing is-

That you are not a painter.

What is a man and what

Do you do with him?

You paint him into

The picture and you

Watch him paint himself out-

And the woman-

You frame her in. 

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