What if?
What if now that all is different so are we? What if without realising it we have all learned from this experience, taken memories from this experience? What if life may be different but still just as good? What if as the door of caring for Sophie closes another one opens, opening us to millions of possibilities and opportunities that will also fill us with joy?
What if? What if? What if...
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What Have I learned from this roller coaster of 4 years, of my whole life? The answer is simple. That life goes on. You fall, you get back up. You get lost, you find yourself once more. The cycle is endless as well as constant. Either way the outcome is always getting back on your feet, rising above the obstacle. It's how humanity lives. It's how we live. We heal ourselves, we heal one another. And that's how I adapted to not having Sophie to care for anymore. The first few weeks were hard, there would be times between the both of us where one would walk into her room and for a moment wonder where she is. There would be moments where I would just go into the bathroom and sit on the tiles, clutching her bear to my chest and breathing in the scent of her. These moments are just one of those times where one needs something to clutch onto, something to give you reassurance.
The first day she was gone we were mostly busy, it being the triplets birthday we spent most of the day at Haymitch and Effie's. It was only when we arrived home with no work or distractions when things felt more lonely. The house felt almost hollow. But then we started getting back on our feet, moving on. We started receiving letters from Sophie, since they are back in district four and got a picture of her with Dara.
He looks so like her it's crazy. They may not be identical but they do have similar facial features. You would know by looking at them that they are brother and sister. She seems happy, the way Madge describes things she is happy, she has adjusted. Peeta and I have found ourselves adjusting too, the bakery continues to thrive and the wedding nears with each day. There is still moments where it feels like something is missing, like we have forgotten something. But as time goes on our love fills the gaps, we fill the missing spaces with our lives, our happiness as well as our troubles. But no matter what the case there will always be a place in my heart for Sophie Hawthorne Undersee.
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Peeta's POV
Adjusting is a struggle, eventually a habit and finally its not at all needed. That cycle took place within the time after Sophie left. At first it was hard, you'd be looking for her to be refreshed with the memory she is no longer there with you. That's how it was for a while then as time went on life and reality took over and the sadness and loneliness wouldn't be as frequent. That time is now, is always. But we still have each other and our love and that's what keeps us going, keeps us happy. Katniss seems to think the same, she's livened up a lot in the past few months. We both have bad days, but all I need is to see her bright and promising smile and I know that everything will be okay. We will be okay, always.
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Katniss's POV
"Auntie Kat!"
I whip around to find the two kids running towards me, diving into my open arms and clinging tight around me. I laugh as they squeeze me tight in a hug
"Sophie! Dara! Hi!"
They both pull away, giggling and squealing as they run past Madge and into the other room. I look up as she enters through the doorway. She asks me with a laugh
"Sorry Katniss! They didn't bother you did they"?
I smile, looking up at her as she looks out to see her mischief children playing up and down the hall and tell her
"No, of course not. It's always great to see them"
She smiles genuinely, walking over and taking a seat beside me and asking
"Well... Are you excited for tomorrow?"
I nod, glancing at Sophie for a moment as I hear her laugh before responding to her question
"Of course, it's been a long time coming but the wait was worth it. Sometimes life just gets in the way"
She laughs and nods in agreement. Peeta and I have been engaged for two years and finally tomorrow we will be married. We could have of course gotten married much earlier but with all that happened with Sophie and the bakery becoming more time consuming as well as successful. Life got in the way, we could have been married in the middle of all this clutter but we wanted it to be special. We waited until the time was right, and that time is now. Madge is silent for a moment, looks down to the floor and sits her arms on her stomach before saying with a smile
"I'm pregnant"
"Oh wow! Congratulations!"
We hug for a moment and when I pull away she has a huge grin on her face as she tells me
"Thank you! We only found out 2 weeks ago, still have to tell those two"
Her smile remains as she looks out the hall at her two children who play happily with one another. Sophie has grown so much within 2 years, now 6 years old. When I look at her and see how grown up she has become I can't help but look at every one of us and see how we have progressed and grown. Madge, a mother who at first gave away her child and thought she was incapable of minding her two children on her own has since reunited with their father and is now expecting another child. Gale, a father who I remember a year ago explained to me how he felt nervous of being a father and is now very loving and caring toward his children. Gale who went through a stage in his life where he was involved in war and destruction has now healed himself and created a family of his own. Sophie who I know from Madge first struggled with the fact of her twisted family and muddled first years of her life has now come to accept that Madge and Gale are truly her parents, not Peeta and I. Peeta and I, well we found true love in each other within these years and learned to never take one another for granted again. What I've learned is simple, what I've had over the last few years, the happiness as well as the sadness is a rare thing. But I wouldn't possibly trade it, because all of that got me here after all.
Madge and Gale told us that they plan on keeping our time with Sophie a secret for a while which at first I was in disagreement but then I remembered how young and innocent she is and how much impact that would have on her so eventually I realised that they were keeping this from her for the best. How that will turn out in the future I don't know but I can't predict that right now. I can't predict much. All I know is that tomorrow I will be Mrs. Everdeen Mellark. I will be wed to the man I plan to spend every second of the rest of my life with. Tomorrow night I will look up at these stars alone at this moment but knowing tomorrow night I will look up at these starts accompanied by my husband, by Peeta Mellark. Marriage is a way of showing the world our deep love. For us, well its simply an eternal reminder of the three words we speak daily to one another
"I love you"