Millie
"Hey Angel." his voice spoke quietly, a slight smirk playing around his disgusting lips.
"No." I shook my head, taking steps backwards. "This can't be true." I whispered to myself.
"It is." Harry coldly spoke finally. "Why Millie?" I felt my stomach being tied in knots. He was so disappointed and that's when the tears were falling freely over my face. "Harry." I tried, but the sobs that were escaping my mouth made it hard for me to speak. "Let me explain." I begged, but he just shook his head and finally looked up. "He already explained it for you. What were you thinking?" He shook his head again and scrunched his face up, trying to stop himself from crying.
"Millie, Millie, Millie. Made me wait in fucking Michigan for you." Elliot spoke, which earned him an glare from me. But I couldn't be bothered to talk to him, Harry was my priority now. "Harry, whatever he told you, was a lie." I started but he put his hand up, making me shut up instantly.
"Really though? Was it a lie that you came here, told him to wait for you. You fucking told him you'd come back. All this time you were in a relationship. Breaking two hearts at the same time! How could you do that? How could you even look at yourself in the mirror? How could you tell me you love me, without flinching? How could you play such a different person, from who you really are?" He spoke, his words filled with disgust.
Elliot just watched me, trying to get myself out of this mess. "Harry, this is not true. Just listen to me and you'll.." but he threw his beer, I didn't notice he held, against the wall, making me jump and closing my eyes. "STOP LYING." he yelled and I pressed my lips together in a thin line, hands were balled to fists and my eyes still closed. "STOP FUCKING LYING. I FUCKING LOVED YOU, I WOULD HAVE GIVEN YOU EVERYTHING, BUT YOU FUCKING PLAYED WITH MY FEELINGS." he yelled at me loudly. "Harry, I love you. You have to believe me." I cried hysterically, trying to get closer to him but all he did was taking steps backwards and throwing his hands up, silently telling me to not get closer.
On the one hand, I was frightened and scared, because Elliot was here. On the other hand, I was trying to explain Harry everything that happened, but not here. I wanted to talk to him and explain, but I knew Elliot would not go anywhere, without me.
"You don't fucking love me, you never did, did you? Was it just a game? Was is to push your ego? Was I nothing more than someone for lonely nights for you? I don't get it. You could've told me that you had a fucking boyfriend all across the world from here and I would've backed up, but you were playing a game and now you fucking broke my heart, Millie." his voice was filled with toxic, and it was slowly killing me to see him like this. I knew I fucked up bad time, with not telling him what really happened between me and Elliot.
"Harry, I never pretended to love you, you have to understand me, I was not.." but Elliot was fast to interrupt me, when Harry finally started to listen.
"You are disgusting." Elliot spoke, his words having the same effect on me as earlier. His words brought me down again, making myself feel like I had no self worth. And I knew, I could not mend things with Harry, he would never trust me again, he would never love me again.
I cried loudly, trying to hold onto something. I would never get to kiss him again, never get to make him laugh, never have a serious conversation or a playfully one. Those thoughts were killing me right on the spot.
I lost him right there.
"Harry, please." I sobbed, taking a step forward. I must've looked so pathetic, trying to reach for him, because he stepped backwards, which made me fall to my knees, due to my drunkenness and due to my weak self right now.
"Stay away from me." he hissed, looking down at me. "I do not ever want to see you again. You and me are done. I hope you are happy now, breaking me. I want you to stay away from Gina, Luke, David. Hell, I even want you to stay away from Hannah. She may have been a bitch, but she never played with me or my feelings like you did." He seethed and I knew he was right. I am a horrible person.
I felt myself breaking apart, there was no way for me to tell him how things actually went. He would not let me explain. He was done with me and I understood him completely.
I leaned myself against the cold wall, hiding my face into my knees, which were pressed against my chest, while I was crying into my arms. I felt myself breaking more and more, knowing I've lost the love of my life.
He hated me.
"Don't ever try to contact me again, I'll bring you your stuff downstairs and you can do whatever you want with mine. Burn it, throw it away, I don't ever want to see you again. I'm done with you, for good." he whispered and I knew he was trying hard not to break in front of Elliot. "You're disgusting." he said and with that, I heard his footsteps distancing him from myself and I was alone now.
"Millie, Millie, Millie." I heard Elliot's voice. "Look at that mess you made. Have you really thought I'd let you go like this? Have you really thought," I felt him come closer and suddenly he yanked me by my hair, pulling my head up to look at him, "you'd see the last of me?" His eyes were filled with hatred and I knew I was in danger.
"Elliot, you're hurting me." I cried and tried to pull his hand away from my hair, gripping his wrist, but he took my hand with his free one and yanked it away, pulling me up completely by my hair. I was crying out in pain, a proper headache already starting to form.
"I don't fucking care, you hurt me, too, Angel. You hurt me a lot, leaving me without a word. You know I love you and I will not let you go that easily." He spat and looked at me. "We're leaving. Now." he demanded and pulled me by my wrist to a taxi, which I told my address.
"Everything okay, love?" The taxi driver looked at his mirror, eyeing me worriedly. "She's good." Elliot answered for me, gripping my thigh harshly. "I did not ask you, did I mate?" the taxi driver shot back and looked at me again. "You alright, love?" he asked again and I just nodded, avoiding his eyes. "I'm good, thanks." I mumbled, feeling Elliot's stare on me, telling me to better shut up. The taxi driver didn't believe me, but did not ask any further questions. When we arrived at my apartment, Elliot paid the driver and I saw him looking at me again. I just fake smiled at him and left the cab.
When we entered the front door, I felt a sharp pain on my cheek, making me look up in confusion. "What was that?" Elliot asked, his hand still raised, after he slapped me. "What?" I asked, holding me cheek, starting to cry again. "Were you flirting with him?" Elliot furrowed his eyebrows and I knew what was about to come. I lived with him for two years and he was always jealous about every little thing. He was so fast to lose his temper.
"I was not, he asked me if I was alright and I answered, for fucks sake." I defended myself, quickly walking forward to my apartment door and unlocking it.
"Do not fucking talk back to me like that." Elliot pushed me out of his way and aggressively slipped his shoes of, kicking them somewhere on the floor. "Not even here for half an hour with you and you're already pissing me off." He mumbled and plopped down on the couch. Everything was still a mess from the pre games.
"Why are you here then?" I asked, biting my lip instantly at my stupid comment. He turned around and I knew I fucked up big time.
"Because," he got up and walked to me, "I wanted to know where you are? I love you Millie, I do not let things go I love. I fight for those things and I don't run away like a pathetic little bitch, like you are one. Still so stupid and disgusting." He spat, eyeing me from head to toe, while I was looking at the ground.
"Elliot," I build up my courage, "I do not love you anymore. I've found someone new and you would do yourself a favour by leaving again and finding someone else." I avoided eye contact, being scared of his response.
"I don't want anyone else." He punched the wall next to me and I was relieved that it wasn't my face. I was still spilling tears, but I knew I had to find my way out of this.
***
Harry
I was currently leaning against the cold wall, where I walked to, after walking away from Millie.
Of course, I wanted to comfort her, to hold her and tell her everything was going to be fine. Of course, I wanted to punch that fucker for telling her she was disgusting, even though I understood him.
He told me, Millie wanted to take a break from her parents and all the stress at home, so she decided to leave for a year or two, but that he could visit anytime he wanted and that he should wait for her to come back. He told me she always send him messages about how she loved him and how she missed him. He told me he wanted to surprise her and saw us all leaving the building from our flats and wanted to surprise her at the club then, but he saw how we were holding hands before we separated into the cab and that's why he wanted to talk to me first and explain things.
I pitied him. He was actually waiting for her, wasting his time for her. He still loved her and he told me he wanted to work things out. He was actually understanding towards her. I would not stand in their way, even though I love Millie with all my heart. I loved her to death and back to life. I wanted to talk her into staying with me, but I just couldn't when he was waiting for her all this time. I didn't even knew what she wanted to explain, when he already did.
She played this game so well, that I never second guessed her love.
"Mate, where have you been?" Someone asked and when I looked up, I saw everyone in front of me we worry in their eyes. Gina kneeled in front of me, looking confused. "Where's Millie?" She asked, while stroking my thigh. "Harry, where is she?" she asked again sternly, after not receiving an answer.
"I don't want to talk about it. In fact, I don't ever want to talk about her ever again. I.." I slowly got up and shook my head to get rid of my dark thoughts, "I just need some time alone." I mumbled and walked away, leaving my friends cluelessly behind.
I took quick and long strides along the filled streets. It was weekend, everyone was happy, being drunk, drugged or just in love. I did not acknowledge the people I brushed past. All I could concentrate on was the tears I tried to hold back and not to lose my mind right on the spot.
My thoughts were spinning and racing through my mind, clouding my sense of what was wrong and what was right. So many questions were being asked, with no answer in sight.
How could she tell me she loved me? Why couldn't she just be honest? We could've worked things out. Why was she still trying to convince me, that she hasn't got a boyfriend when he was standing right there?
One thing didn't add to another. It was not a misery that was solved, the misery was just being created.
Normally, someone acts weird and you begin to question that person. You ask that person and they will always be nervous around a certain topic. She never was. Millie was never one to talk about her past, but she wasn't playing around, she just genuinely wouldn't talk about it, but it wasn't the weird kind of brushing the topic off, it was more of a "It still hurts, that's why' kinda way. So by now, normally, it would've been a misery solved, she had another boyfriend and that's why she never wanted to talk about it.
But I couldn't wrap my mind around it, though, something seemed so messed up and weird. She was trying so hard to convince me that there was another story to it, but I couldn't believe her anymore.
She was lying all through out relationship, why would she be honest now? Why did she feel the need to have two fucking boyfriends? We were so happy..
Of course, a few arguments here and there, but it wasn't that bad. Just how normal couples fight. I was so happy with her. I'm so in love with her. Her kindness, her warmness, her squinty eyes when she laughs, her pride, her beautiful ocean blue eyes, her tiny body, her intelligence, her trust issues even, her laugh, when she laughs fully hearted, her small fingers drawing patterns on my thigh when she talks to someone and doesn't even notice how she always needs to touch me, how cuddly she can get, her beautiful lips moaning my name.. her lips always saying my name, her hugs, her bad cooking skills, her good heart.
I felt the tears wetting my cheeks again and I couldn't care less about the stares I earned from the strangers, because there was only one thing running through my busy mind.
I lost her.