You can imagine her as Jessica Walkers. Or anyone else too. A sorta long author's note at the end.
One last thing before you start, I'm not perfect.
When I was only 16, I had decided to never marry. To never have a family. To never take orders from anyone. To be independent.
All because of just one person.
But that's a story for some other time 'cause right now I had something else to concentrate on.
Which is my job. I perform it in a medium sized room having white coloured walls. My wooden table was slightly broken but other than that, it was perfect.
"My wife cheated on me. My kids despise me. My family is basically ruined. I have nothing...absolutely nothing to live for. What-what can I do now that I've nothing left?" James, a 35 year old average-looking man and also one of my patients asked, holding back a sob.
"The question isn't what should you do, the question is what do you want to do?" I asked him back, slightly stern.
Wondering why I'm giving him advice? That's because I work as a counsellor in a well-known hospital.
And do I like this job?
Not one bit.
The reason being me. I'm not exactly clueless but neither do I have complete idea of what I do. I never studied in this field and I don't have the proper education to qualify as a counsellor. Yet, here I am, sitting in a comfy chair with my patient seeking help from me.
For money, of course.
Yes, I know it's illegal. But it's the only way for survival too.
Life can sometimes surprise you. Who am I kidding? Life always surprises you.
"I-I don't know. Sometimes I just want to break stuff out of anger. But sometimes..." He clasped his hands together and didn't meet my eye.
"Sometimes?" I questioned him further.
"I want to end all this," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
It doesn't take a genius to figure out what 'this' means. It was clear that he didn't want to live anymore.
Yeah, a suicide thought.
Now most people would be all shocked and surprised at his words but not me. I have to deal with such patients everyday and convince them that there this something in this world that requires you to live. Which by the way, isn't as easy as it seems.
I find his thoughts wrong. Just so wrong.
And I plan on changing them.
"Why?" I asked.
"Well, because I've got no family or friends. No one. Absolutely no one gives a shit wether I live or not. So why should I live?" He spoke bitterly.
Deep inside, I felt pity for him, but I didn't dare show it. People suffering from depression do not like pity. Well, at least I didn't. And he clearly didn't look like he wants pity from me.
"You're alive for a purpose. Live for yourself. Now tell me, do you think your wife cheating on you is your fault?" I asked.
I might not know much about this whole 'counsellor' thing, but I sure do know how to give great advice, in my opinion.
"Of course it is. I must have been a horrible husband," he muttered, burying his face in his hands, guiltily.
"Or maybe you weren't. Maybe she was just a bitch and wasn't worthy for your love. Tell me, did you ever shout at her? Hit her? Scream at her?" I tried to get as much as information as I could, that way I can tell him that he's wrong.
"Never," he replied back without any hesitation.
I could understand why he opened up to me so much. It's easier to tell your problems or to talk about the things you've done which makes you feel guilty to a stranger. Because you know you might never meet them and give them an opportunity to judge you.
"Then you weren't a bad husband. Stop blaming yourself for it. It's not your fault. You still have half of your life left and I don't want you to waste it for some lady who didn't deserve you. Is there anything else that I should know?" I questioned just to make sure that I wasn't missing out on some important information.
"No," he answered, thinking about it. Not fully convinced, I see.
"Think about this: Are you really gonna end your life because of just some lady who didn't left you for someone else?" I asked, leaning front.
"You cannot understand how it feels when no one cares about you. When you have no family," he spoke with resentment clear in his voice, which was now slowly raising.
"Trust me, I do," I spoke calmly. And no, I wasn't lying, unfortunately. What he was going through is something I've experienced once in my life.
It wasn't fun.
"Then you must know that it isn't easy," he spoke, kinda harshly I must add. He didn't look like he believed me.
"It wasn't. But when did I say that life's easy? Life is considered a gift as well as a challenge," I said, leaning back against the chair.
He nodded, agreeing. Almost everyone agrees with this. I mean when has life been all strawberries and no lemon?
Never. As soon as you escape one damn problem, the other shall prepare itself to come at you. It's kinda funny, you know? We basically spend our whole lives just trying to escape all these complications in our life that we barely get some time to really live it.
But that's just me, isn't it?
"I understand. Is there anything I can do to get rid of such thoughts?" James asked, a little more calmer now.
"Well, in my opinion, I think you should take a break. Try to get your mind off these things which bother you. Think about the happy moments in your life and try creating some. And you know that you can have a chat with me whenever you want to." I said with a reassuring smile.
"Thank you Dr.Walkers. I'll consider that. You seem to know just the way to make me feel better." He said, as he got out of the chair he's been sitting on since the past hour.
"Isn't that what my job is?" I asked, jokingly.
"Well, yeah. And also thanks for not judging me on my thoughts." He spoke with honesty lacing his tone.
"Anytime." I said, and my last patient of the day left with a smile.
I sighed. Of course it felt good to know that you just made someone's life much happier than before, but at the same time, it can be exhausting.
"Hey Jess!" Cass, my best friend or how you guys say 'BFF' yelled as she stormed through my office door.
My best friend, or popularly known as Cassandra Ambers was the one who knew every little secret about me. Everything. Same goes for her. I know the details about each and every date she ever went on. Which is a lot.
With her jet black hair and amazingly light blue eyes, not to mention her fair skin tone, the only word suitable for her appearance is gorgeous.
And then you've got me. Chocolate brown hair, eyes accompanied with a giant mole on my neck which isn't very visible, I manage to somewhat look presentable.
"Why are you so... unusually happy?" I asked, even though I knew the answer perfectly well.
It's gotta be a-
"I've got a DATE!" She screamed.
Of course she has. She has gone on so many dates, I don't think that even she remembers all of them. Most of her dates go pretty good, but some just, well let's just say that they turn out disastrous in ways I wouldn't like to mention. She doesn't get upset though, which is surprising. Most girls would be bawling their eyes out if their dates don't turn out well.
"Name," I demanded.
"Ashford Miller," she said with a straight face.
"Picture," I demanded, again.
Now, I'm not trying to interrogate her. She's beautiful and that's what's her weakness too. People can easily take advantage of her because of her carefree nature. So of course, being the best friend I am, I protect her from people like those.
Yeah, I'm the more 'mature' one in this relationship.
She took out her phone and clicked some buttons and showed me a picture of a nice looking guy.
Like seriously nice. The model level nice.
That's a very, very huge level of nice.
He was grinning in the picture, a big grin. His teeth weren't perfectly aligned but hair was perfectly messy, just like the main character of some of your teenage fiction books. He had the mischievous look in his eyes, which reminded me of my childhood self. His nose was slightly crooked and he seemed to have a few freckles.
Cass and Ashford would make the golden couple.
Ms. Beautiful and Mr. Handsome.
"Can I?" Cass pleaded. She always asks me before going on a date. Cause that's what best friends do, I guess.
"Hmm," I replied.
"Yay!" She shrieked.
"'Kay, when is it?" I spoke as I got up from my seat.
"Tonight! I'm so excited that I can barely even catch my breath!" She said, jumping like a crazy bunny. No offence to them though, they're adorably cute.
"Don't you say that every time you get a date?" I raised an eyebrow.
"I do? Hmm, never thought about it." She said, tapping her finger on her chin.
I checked my watch to see that it was seven in the evening already. I had to get out of here or else I might miss my bus, which drops me off at my home.
"Hey Cass, I'll be leaving now. Or I'm gonna miss my bus." I said, packing my bags.
"Ok, bye! I'll tell you all about it tomorrow. Call me when you get home." She spoke, the excitement crystal clear in her voice.
"Yeah, sure. Bye!" I said, waving my hand as I reached for the door.
*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*
(Don't those Asterisks look like eyes? And the underscores like the mouth or something? Meh. Ditch it.)
Chocolate world.
That was the only way to describe this magical place. Chocolate fountains, chocolate houses, chocolate parks, chocolate trains and anything you can imagine was chocolate. Also there was every kind of chocolate you could imagine. White chocolate, milk chocolate, dark chocolate, every kind of chocolate.
Near my left leg there was a puddle of something which looked like water. After a short while, I realised that it was my drool. I quickly stepped aside, making sure that no part of my foot was in contact with it.
I put my right hand's index finger in the chocolate fountain beside me which seemed to have appeared out of nowhere, pulled it out to find it covered with delicious brown substance. I bought my finger towards my mouth to taste it. My finger and tongue were just about to meet and make love-
'You've got a call. Pick it up right now. Right now. Right now.' A annoying raspy voice which I'd like to describe as my night ringtone woke me up from my delicious dream. You see, I have different ring tones for night and day. The night one being more annoying and raspy. The day one sounds sweet.
I groaned, but picked it up from the small table beside my bed. I rubbed my eyes to get rid of the drowsiness and checked the name of the caller. It was Cass.
"Fuck you Cass." I muttered, picking up the phone. Not literally, of course.
If there's one thing I love other than my favourite ice cream, that's sleep. The only way to get rid of all your problems is sleep, if only for a few hours. And Cass knew that very well, a little too well. Guess you could say that she had a few bad experiences when she woke me at midnight.
"Hello?" I asked, my voice coming out dull and tired.
"Hey Jess." She spoke casually. I waited for a few seconds for her to explain why was she calling me at 11 pm.
"That's it? You just wanted to say hi to me?" I asked, my eyes closing slightly.
"What? No! I need a favour from you." She spoke.
"What is it?" I asked, my voice sounding heavy.
"Judging by your voice I have a guess that you were sleeping." She pointed out.
There, you have my best friend's brainpower. She isn't dumb but could be clueless about the most obvious things.
"No shit Sherlock. Now, didn't you say that you wanted some sort of favour?" I asked, again.
"Oh, yeah. Could you drop by The Black Pearl restaurant? You know, the one which is just a few miles from your house," she said.
I couldn't concentrate on her words. My eyes were slowly drooping, again. But I made out the words 'drop by'. And I didn't like the sound of that.
That's because I didn't want to leave my bed.
I yawned. "Why?" I asked.
"Long story. Come here using my motorbike. The keys-"
"-Are in the drawers. I know. Is this any sort of emergency? Or joke for that matter?" I asked, still not wanting to leave my comfy bed. Why would anyone like to leave their comfy bed in the middle of night?
"It's an emergency. Also get your purse." She replied. This time I didn't bother to ask her why because I knew there was a long story behind it.
There's always a long story behind midnight calls.
"Just so you know, you ruined my chocolate world." I huffed.
"Your what?" She asked.
"Nevermind. I'll be there as soon as possible. But this better be an emergency or I spill all your dirty secrets to the next guy you go on a date with." I warned her.
I could just imagine her beautiful electric blue eyes go wide in fear. "S-s-sure. Bye." With that the line went dead.
I sighed. I didn't know what to do with my hair. I didn't bother to comb it, so I tied it into a messy bun and decided to just put some jeans with the top I already had on. It was a cute, pink Hello Kitty top. They're sorta adorable.
I looked...presentable, as usual.
I took the keys and put my wallet in my right back pocket. Then, I left for the Black Pearl restaurant for God knows what reason.
But I still miss my chocolate world.
Come on, who wouldn't?
AUTHOR'S NOTE COMING UP ~
Guys, I don't know how exactly does a counsellor works so this could be a cause for the dumbness of this chapter.
Many of you told me not to apologise so many times in the prologue. The thing is, there was this one wattpader who felt offended by it. He/She said that it could offend anyone else too, so I decided to write an apology.
Although this chapter does strike me as boring...