Niall's POV
The next morning after Zayn told me that Harry was going to fight a pro fight was just like any other morning other than the fact Zayn stayed in bed just a little longer than I did because his head was hurting from getting punched by Harry a few times. I got the boys their breakfast ready and made sure they had their school uniforms on properly. Ezra seemed quieter this morning, but any time Ethan would leave the room he would look at me like he had something to say.
"Ezra, have you had enough?" I asked him when I saw him watching me intently as I ate my own breakfast. He nodded then begin to play with his school tie. Ethan finished his toast and got up to put his plate in the sink. He came over and jumped on my lap for a bit so I could give him his cuddles that he's always asking for from both Zayn and I.
"Go brush your teeth, baby. Don't forget to floss." I told him, kissing his cheeks a few times. He got off my lap and ran up the stairs. I got up to take my plate to the sink and to rinse them off to place them in the dishwasher.
"Is dad going to do another fight?" Ezra asked me in the silence that was in the kitchen. I turned around to look at my son and I swear I turned around to just look at his father. There was something in his eyes that didn't make them look like mine. They were the same soft color mine were, but they had an edge to them that I only really noticed now that belonged to Zayn.
"He's retired from boxing. His last fight was when you were six and that's when he realized he was done. Now he's just going to help Uncle Harry get ready for his fight." I said to my son. He stood up to take his plate to the sink before just looking down in the sink like he had more to say. I ran my fingers through his thick black hair as a way to encourage his to say what he needed to.
"I think I want to try... Never mind. I need to brush my teeth." Ezra told me then ran out of the kitchen faster than I could stop him so we could have a better conversation about what he wanted to try. There are so many things boys his age would want to try. I know at his age I tried my mum's bra on and make up. Zayn told me when he was Ezra's age he tried beer for the first time because some man off the street offered it to him. I don't mind him being open with me about anything. I want him to be, actually. Ethan is, and I just want the same for his big brother. However, he's his father's son and words are hard things.
The boys came back down the stairs as I was slipping on my shoes and getting the car keys to take then to school because obviously Zayn wasn't in any condition to be doing that right now. Ezra didn't even look at me as he walked out the door, but I didn't press him of any of what could have been going on with him. I just let Ethan grab my hand and pulled me to the car. The whole drive to school was full of Ethan and Ezra talking quietly about something while I listened to the music that was on the radio.
"It has finally been confirmed this morning that Harry Styles will be fighting Lucas Johnson again in the ring. If you all remember, Styles had fought Johnson years ago as his first professional fight. Now, we'll be seeing a rematch between the two in a month from today. All I know is that whoever wins will want to try for the title from Zayn Malik." The man on the radio said. I looked in the rear view mirror to see if the boys heard that, which they didn't because Ethan was too busy entertaining his brother. I let out a deep breath and hoped from Louis and Harry's sake that he will win that way those two won't have any more postponements for their wedding. At this point, I'm starting to question how much they love each other. That's none of my business through.
"Alright, boys. Help others and be kind to everyone. I love you. I'll pick you up after school." I told my son's as we got to the student drop off zone. They both got out of the car with their backpacks and a small smile as they waved to me and walked towards the building. I watched Ezra pull Ethan closer to him just before they walked in, making me smile because those two are the best brothers in this whole world.
When I got back home from dropping the boys off, Zayn was sitting on the counter eating a bowl of oatmeal. He had to bruises under his eyes that looked bad, but other than that he looked fine. The cuts seemed to have healed pretty fast. He looked up from his food and got down to come over and smother me with kisses and tight hugs. I hid my face in his chest that was only being covered by a thin white t-shirt.
"I love you." I mumbled into his chest. He said the same thing back to me then reached down to squeeze my bum with both his hands. I swat him, but I secretly really liked it and wanted more. I kissed his lips a few times before my phone started ringing in my pocket. Zayn spanked me gently and walked back to get his food. I kicked his bum then ran away as I answered the call. If there's one thing I've learned from being married to a boxer, it's to never insinuate play fighting in any way. Zayn always seems to get me in his grip and tickle the life out of me. I don't really like that so I usually find myself running away from him after trying to hit him. Once both of us ran around the house with him chasing me while our boys just sat on the couch watching us like they couldn't believe how disgusting their parents were.
"This is Niall." I said on the phone after I answered without looking at the caller ID. I got to the living room and plopped on the couch. Zayn came in and curled up next to me so his head was on my lap and turned on the morning news. My hand went right to his hair and begin to mess with it.
"Hey, Niall. It's Doniya. I was just calling to remind you about your check up you have at two this afternoon." Doniya, Zayn's sister and my "lady doctor", said on the phone. She was a huge part of my whole family's life, not only because she was Zayn's long lost sister, but because she's been there for both of my babies before they were even born. I hate doctors still to this day, but I'll make an exception for her.
"Oh, crap I had completely forgotten. Thanks for reminding me. How have you been?" I asked her. She went on to tell me that she was doing wonderful and just the other day another man went in and found out he was pregnant with twins. I smiled and felt that urge in me to hang up and make Zayn give me a baby right here on this couch. I pulled at Zayn's hair a little more to distract myself from that feeling I sometimes get. That's when Zayn and I both know sex is completely off limits because the chances of me getting pregnant again are higher.
"That's so wonderful. Zayn is right here. Do you want to talk to him?" I asked her then shoved the phone into Zayn's face once she replied that she wanted to talk to her baby bother.
"Who is it?" He whispered to me after he got the phone off his face. I mouthed it was his sister. He started talking to his sister while I moved around on the couch so I could be the big spoon behind him. He moved for me to get comfortable then reached back for on of my hands to wrap around his stomach. I knew he had to leave soon to go start training Harry, so I took this time with him to just cuddle him and feel the love he has for me.
In the crazy busy life we have, it makes it hard for us to show how much we love each other. We say it all the time with the same amount of sincerity to it as the first time, but the physical way of showing how much we love each other is a place where I wanted more of. And maybe it was just because I woke up this morning feeling super horny, cranky, hungry and like I could cry if we ran out of ice cream, but I felt that we were lacking in the physical area.
"Alright, well I guess Niall will see you today and you'll be over on Saturday so the rest of us will see you then. Love you." Zayn said, hanging up with his sister. He laid my phone down on the coffee table then huffed as he massaged his temple with his free hand.
"Zayn?" I asked quietly. He hummed out something that I knew ment to continue one talking. My cheeks turned red because I didn't really want to ask him for sex verbally. I just didn't want to sound like I could ever want more from Zayn than what he's already given me. That goes down to the smallest thing such as a kiss. So I just pushed my face into the back of his neck and peppered a few kisses there. My hand slid from Zayn's stomach to his chest then back down to his lower stomach. I kissed his neck a few more times before hooking my leg over his hips and getting closer to him.
"Niall... I'm kind of sore and my head is still hurting. I'm sorry, babe." Zayn said slowly like he didn't want to hurt my feelings. I moved off him and just laid there feeling my heart pump slowly because that's all I really wanted right now.
I sat up and climbed over Zayn to run off into the bathroom as some stupid tears begin to build up in my eyes. I knew right then and there what was going on with me. It was "that time" for me. Really I shouldn't be crying over this. Zayn and I have both turned each other down for sex more times than we actually have it. It's for very stupid reasons that we do it too. Once I said that I didn't want to because I ate Mexican food with Louis for lunch and he told me he didn't want to because Harry punched him in the balls on accident. This was a good reason because he's wounded and I should be taking care of him. I shouldn't be sitting on the bathroom counter crying my eyes out over this. I guess it's just hormones that makes a cut into an amputation.
"Niall, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to... I didn't know you wanted... I'm an idiot for... Just... Why are you crying?" Zayn asked through the door sounding like he was just so confused. I smiled through my tears because that was the man I loved; always trying to fix me and protect me from my own feelings. Then I started crying because I loved him so much. He opened the door and ran over to pull me in his arms. I wrapped my arms around his neck and legs around his waist and cried into his neck. He rubbed my back and told me that I was alright and that he had me, so I just held him tighter as I pulled myself together.
"All better?" He asked me once I finished crying. I nodded into his shoulder but didn't let go of him. He picked me and and started to carry me somewhere, but I didn't looked up from where I was hiding in his strong shoulder. I was set down on another counter top so I let go to see we were not the kitchen. Zayn kissed my lips a few times before going to the refrigerator. He pulled out vanilla bean ice cream, chocolate sauce and mini chocolate chips. I felt like I wanted to cry again because he knew what I needed. I watched him make me a small bowl of the frozen treat and make sure to put enough chocolate to make me happy again then came over to pick me up from the counter again. It's times like these that a swear he's Superman because he carried me and the bowl of ice cream back to the living room. He set me on the couch then started to get one of my favorite movies playing. He sat next to me and covered me with a fluffy blanket and let me climb over him until I was comfortable to eat my ice cream. Zayn kissed my temple a few times then rubbed over my lower stomach in a soothing way that just felt nice. I didn't have cramps or anything, I just liked the way his big hand felt on my body.
"I love you so much, Niall Malik. You'll never understand how much I love you. I'll do anything for you. I'm sorry about not wanting to make love to you, but I promise you that I'll make it up to you soon. If you need anything, I'll be right here for you. I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy and know you're the most loved man in this world." Zayn whispered in my ear. I finished my bite and turned to kiss him. He pressed on my stomach as we kissed slowly then pulled back so I could rest on his chest again and eat my happiness in a bowl.
After I had finished my ice cream, I must have drifted off a little because I was woken up by Zayn's cell phone ringing. I looked at the telly and saw it was now on the sports channel instead of the movie that had been playing. It was going crazy about Harry me, but I was still sleepy so I didn't really have it in me to care that my best friend's fiancé was blowing up the world. My eyes closed again while Zayn answered his phone.
"Just give me another thirty minutes and I'll be there. Start by running three miles and we'll go from there. Mark is also going to kick your arse so get ready." Zayn said kind of quietly like he didn't want to wake me up in any way. I can understand that. During this time, I'm a lot more tolerable while I'm sleeping. Zayn must have hung up because he started to kiss my forehead and pull the blankets up some more on me. I opened my eyes and smiled at him which got me a big smile from Zayn.
"Feeling better?" He whispered to me. I nodded and rolled so I could be even closer to my husband. We both stayed quiet for a few minutes just enjoying this while we had it. Zayn started to shift under me, so I took that as much queue to get up for him to get to work. He kissed my lips a few times before we both walked upstairs to our bedroom. We both changed in to some workout clothes, but Zayn actually put effort into not looking like a colorful lime unlike me.
"I'll pick the boys up from school and take them back with me to the gym because of your appointment. Call me once you're done and tell me if everything is okay. You can go out with Louis for a while if that will make you happy. I've got the boys, you just focus on you today. I'll see you later, baby." Zayn said, giving me a kiss and getting his wallet. I said a small I love you to him and watched him leave the bedroom.
For the rest of the day I did whatever I wanted to do and not what I had to do. I ran two miles on the treadmill we have in Zayn's office- which is just a work out room because that's the type of job he has- and did a few strength exercises to try to tighten my body up some more. After I was done, I took a shower and got dressed in something that would look okay if it ended up in a paparazzi picture. I called my parents and talked to them for a while. Zayn made the to where neither of them have to work anymore and they have a nicer house in a better part of Ireland that they always wanted to retire in. My mum asked me about the boys while my dad asked me if he needed to beat Zayn up for anything. My dad loves Zayn as a father would, but the difference here is that my dad would be here in a second to kill Zayn if he ever messed up. I'm just glad that Zayn doesn't mess up and my dad would probably just smack him instead of kill him. Honestly, I still think he's bitter about Zayn getting me pregnant out of wedlock.
Two o'clock rolled around and I found myself sitting in an all too familiar office. I had text Zayn that I was here and just waiting to see the doctor, so he let me go and told me he needed to punch Harry a few times. My hands were a little sweaty because I didn't exactly love doctors offices, but it wasn't as bad as the first time Zayn had to practically drag me in here to make sure that our baby was growing healthily.
"Niall, come on back." Doniya came out to tell me. I stood up and all but ran to Doniya's side. She protectively got my hand in hers and walked me back to an examination room. To me, she was not only Zayn's big sister, but mine as well. I'm also guessing that being protective is a strong Malik trait because both if them got it.
"Just lay back and pull up your shirt so I can do the ultrasound first." She told me. I pulled up my baggy shirt and watched her get her supplies ready for the whole exam. While Doniya was working, she was very focused and serious, but once everything checked out perfect she would act like the woman I've gotten to know. In a way, seeing her like this makes me feel safe and comfortable because she only wants to do what's best. I shivered when she placed some of the gel on my stomach then waited for her to get this part started. I just wished that it would stop at this, but I know better by now. I get one of these done once or twice a year and it's not fun. It's weird in a way too, but it's weirder if I think about it too hard.
"I'm so jealous of you, Niall. You're menstruating without the actual blood and pain." She said as she glided the wand over my lower stomach. I huffed and looked at the screen. Sometimes I miss not seeing a little growing baby there.
"If you and Zayn wanted to give me a niece, any time today would be your best shot." She joked with me. I laughed, but it was a bittersweet laugh because we both knew my body couldn't handle carrying another child. Well, it could but it wouldn't be easy. She ran over a small area then zoomed in. It was my favorite thing to see during these exams. All those little eggs rolling around made me smile because I could have more babies.
"Well, everything seems alright there. I'm going to do that next part really fast and you can be on your way. Go ahead and get into the gown while I go get the other equipment. As soon as Doniya left the room, I wiped off my stomach then got undressed to get in the paper gown. I sat on the table for a few minutes before she came back in with a nurse with her. They set up the stuff then told me to place my legs on the metal stirrups.
"I promise this will be over fast. This will be a little pinch." Doniya told me. The other nurse stood beside her and started to get stuff ready. I felt the little pinch from the needle then my whole bum go completely numb. I turned red and looked up at the ceiling trying to not focus on what she was doing. The only thing I felt the whole time was pressure. I took deep breaths and before I knew it, Doniya was done with the exam. I sat up slowly when she told me I could and didn't dare look at her. It's horrible that she has to do those exams, but she needs to. It's not even a man type of exam, it's to check physically that my girl parts are okay. She left me to get dressed then came back with some paperwork when I was done.
"I know that most of the time for males this doesn't work, but I wanted to suggest a birth control for you. It's just a suggestion that I'm required to give now for any male or female that way they know that's an option. It's really not that effective for males so you don't have to take it." She told me, written something down on her paper.
"Do you think I could get pregnant again and be okay?" I asked her. We had already had this conversation after Ethan was born, but I felt I should bring it up now because I really wanted a baby.
"It's a fifty-fifty chance, Niall. You could be perfectly fine during your pregnancy or you could get half way and miscarry. You could take that chance, but I don't recommend that. I know Zayn couldn't ever emotionally handle a miscarriage because he would somehow find it to be his fault. For you, that is something I pray you never have to go through. If you both want to try, then come back and I'll get you on some pills before you start that way it's healthier. I just really don't recommend it, Niall. I love you both too much to see anything bad happen." Doniya said. I felt my heart break a little because I wanted a baby, but I wanted a healthy baby that could have a full life.
So, I left my appointment telling Zayn that everything was perfectly fine and there was nothing we needed to worry about. He told me that he picked up the boys and they would be home by five in the afternoon. I sat in my car a while after hanging up with Zayn just thinking. Thinking about how much I wanted another baby. As I drove home, I told myself that those thoughts would be gone in a few days and I would be back to feeling like I could want for nothing. However, a small voice in my mind told me this want wouldn't go away for a while.
A/N: this is the longest chapter I've written in this book haha 4K plus words! Anyway, hope all is well! If you ever wanted a tattoo, what would you get?!?!?!? Comment/Vote!
-Bri ;)