When she got a call from Tiffany's best friend 4 days after IT happened, she was in no shape to face the scary Jung.
"WHAT?!" Her voice boomed through the coffee shop. People looked at them with weird glances but she didn't care. Her eyes were fixated on Jessica's stoic look. Let's say she wasn't happy with Taeyeon for breaking her best friend's heart. But that's not the case right now as Taeyeon felt like her heart died for the second time that week.
"Jessica a-are you serious?" She stumbled over her own words.
"Taeyeon, do I look like I'm joking?" Her tone was clipped, enveloped with hospitality. Taeyeon's mind reeled and she wonders what else God has in stock for her. Enough was on her plate and now this?
She jammed her hand into her purse and searched for her phone to dial Tiffany.
"You think she'll pick up?"
Taeyeon ignored her and grabbed out her phone, almost letting it slip from her slippery sweating hands.
"HEY!" She growled as her phone was snatched away from her grip. Her desperate eyes scanned Jessica's face.
"Taeyeon. What would you say when you call to her? Beg her to stay? Don't you think it's too late? You should've done that 3 nights ago. I don't know what's happening between you guys and I'm in no place to command you to do anything. But Taeyeon, I just want to tell you something. In your current state as a busy superstar, can you guarantee that you can give her happiness and the attention she wants? Can you grand her your time? Maybe it's better to let things be like this. If it's meant to be, you guys will meet again, at the right time."
The younger girl proceeded to stand up, her purse in her hand. Her eyes gazed down at Taeyeon with pity.
"Tiffany warned me not to tell you this but I thought you should know. I don't know what you're planning to do but I thought you might want to bid her a proper farewell before she leaves...tomorrow morning. I've got to go now Taeyeon. I hope we'll meet again."
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It was 10 o'clock at night and Taeyeon was in her car, parked in front of Tiffany's apartment. She couldn't believe Fany was really leaving, and from what Jessica told her, for forever? That's insane. She rubbed her swollen eyes as she looked up to the floor Tiffany was on. She didn't know what brought her here but here she was, preparing to go up to meet Tiffany. But what happens after that? What happens after she comes face to face with Tiffany? Scratch that. Would she even open the door upon seeing Taeyeon?
She was here since 9 and had spent an hour procrastinating her time of going up to see Tiffany.
Her insides were still wrenching and she just sat there, in her seat staring out onto the streets. Her fingers were playing with her necklace, as once again tears fell down. She's been crying heavily for the past four days that her eyes were hurting non-stop and her vision was turning blurry. How can Tiffany just decide to leave? What about her?
Is she serious about ending this? Her gaze turned and landed on the red book placed neatly at the passenger seat. She didn't even remember she brought it with her. For all that she knew, she's been hugging that book to sleep every night now. Her shaking hands went for it, frightened at its content, of what is written inside it. The pads of her fingers ran softly over it's smooth cover, her lips pressing into a tight sad smile.
Jessica was right, although she loathes admitting the truth. Now wasn't the right time for the both of them and she can't give what Tiffany wants, nor be a proper girlfriend.
A deep sigh came from her.
"Am I really letting you go Tiffany? How will I ever get over this? Maybe never." She chuckled to herself sadistically.
"It's time now, to face you."
Each of her steps got heavier as she was close to reaching Tiffany's door.
"Taeyeon, breath." She felt so small and fragile standing in that corridor. Can she even look at Tiffany properly without breaking down again? She was extremely tired, fatigue overwhelming her whole being.
She closed her eyes and bit her pursed lip as she raised her sweaty palm up to press the bell.
DING DONG
Her breath got caught in her throat as her fists curled into tiny balls. Why was she feeling so nervous? She wished to undo her move of ringing the bell since she has come to the realization that she wasn't ready. A sense of frozen coldness seeped over her when the door opened.
"Er...yes?" Taeyeon's eyes that she didn't even know were closed, fluttered open in surprise. That wasn't Tiffany's voice. And she was right. When her eyes landed on the short scrawny girl infront of her, she knew that this definitely wasn't Tiffany. Confusion invaded her as she took a step back and looked at the number.
How did she ever see 203 as 201? She will never know. Her eyes were getting worse every second.
"Er...I...I'm sorry I've got the wrong address." She bowed, her ears turning slightly red.
When the huge wooden door closed with a thud and a click, she sighed and paddled a little bit to the right. Her eyes grazed over the golden plate presenting the number 201. She tore her eyes away and looked again. 201. OK. Check.
An audible sigh escaped her as she has to go through the mental breakdown over again. Why does things have to be so hard?
"Ok...here goes." Pressed.
DING DONG. It was surreal to say the bell sounded intimidating, and her heart beat quickened twice the normal rate.
She could hear the footsteps. The footsteps from the other side walking to the door, the thud increasing with each step it took.
The door swung open and Taeyeon looked up, boldly meeting the eyes of the person on the other side.
She knew Tiffany was surprised to see her out there because her hazel brown eyes were wide with shock. They were clearly red though and it made Taeyeon die inside.
"...Hi." It was the stupidest thing she can ever say in that situation but then again, her mind wasn't processing anyways.
Tiffany remained silent and Taeyeon prayed she would at least say something, to make the situation less tense or awkward.
"Can I come-"
"Jessica must've told you." She backed away and went into her apartment, leaving the door open. Taeyeon took it as a sign for her to come in so she just stepped in.
"Who told you to come in?" Tiffany's cold voice pierced through the air like a sharp sword and Taeyeon stayed rooted to the ground. She then apologized and stepped backwards, her eyes never leaving Tiffany's thin face.
Another set of painful silence filled the air as Taeyeon's mind churned uncontrollably. She was trying hard not to cry and she was extremely afraid that talking too much will just break her down.
"You won't stay even if I asked you to...right?" Fuck. Shit. Her eyes were already getting hot again and she looked up to stop if from falling. She blinked her tears away and put a palm on her eyes.
"I know I'm in no place to stop you and...I...I know that we can't work out even if you stay but..." But what? Taeyeon's mind shut down now that she gave up on suppressing her crying. Her light sobs filled the apartment as her shoulders started to shake from her crying.
"Fany I'm sorry for not treating you good enough. I'm so sorry." She sought for air to breath. "I'm not good enough for you." Her teeth bit down on her bottom lip so hard she tasted blood. Her nails dug down into her palm so hard it shook.
"I..." She stopped midway when Tiffany pulled her into a hug and she sensed her shoulder get wet. She was crying too.
That made Taeyeon weep harder as she gradually reciprocated the warm gesture. Her palms pressed hard against Tiffany's shoulder, pressing Tiffany's figure against hers. Her nose dug into Tiffany's hair as she took in the scent that never failed to make her feel safe. But it was scary. It was undeniably horrifying to know that this might be the last time she gets to feel Tiffany against her, to touch her, to smell that strawberry scent, to feel the warmth and most importantly, to feel safe and loved.
"Taetae...stop crying." Tiffany's hoarse voice whispered into Taeyeon's ear, her hot breath sending goosebumps on Taeyeon's skin. They embraced each other for what seemed like a millennia but to them, it felt like seconds. They didn't want to separate but Tiffany broke free.
"Taeyeon stop crying." She wiped the tears rolling down Taeyeon's cheek and gave lips curved into a small smile.
"It's not the end of the world. Please stop crying." She attempted to laugh but failed. Taeyeon's eyes were squinted shut tightly as her hands never leaving Tiffany's waist. She opened her eyes and stared directly into Tiffany's brown beautiful ones. She was never an ugly crier.
Without saying a thing, Taeyeon leaned in to capture Tiffany's lips and they stayed like that, the salty taste of tears embracing their lips. It was a simple kiss, lips on lips and nothing more. Taeyeon dearly did hope Tiffany would feel everything she wants to tell her. She wished that kiss conveyed all her thoughts and worries and that Tiffany would fully understand the feeling she's experiencing.
They pulled apart and Tiffany stepped back so that there was a noticeable distance between them.
"I'll see you at the airport tomorrow." Taeyeon mumbled but Tiffany shook her head.
"Taeyeon, no." She smiled.
"If you go, I don't think I can leave." Tiffany admitted as she stared at the floor. Crystal tears were still dropping down onto the floor.
"I think you should go now, Taeyeon."
"Tiffany I have a question."
"...yes?"
"If we ever have the chance to meet again, will you give me another chance?"
Taeyeon never let her eyes escaped from Tiffany's face. She needed that answer desperately and she needed it now. For some reason, she felt like this answer will be her motivation for the years to come.
Tiffany gave her what seemed like a smile. "I'll tell you the next time we meet. But for now, good bye Kim Taeyeon."
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"I'm gonna miss you idiot." Jessica hugged her as people rushed passed them, pulling their luggage behind them. Tiffany just gave her a pat on the back.
The girls pulled back and Jessica caressed Tiffany's cheek. "If you need someone to talk to, call me ok?"
"I will. I should go now. It's time Jess." She mustered her energy to give Jessica smile and turned her body.
"Tiff..."
"Yea?"
"Safe trip and please be okay." The ice princess's face showed sincerity as she said that and Tiffany only gave her a mute nod.
The younger girl made her way through the crowd, going for the entrance, her heart heavy as stone.
"I guess you really didn't come for me huh?" She muttered under her breath and a sigh escaped her lips. She tightened the scarf around her neck and walked faster.
"FANY!" It took her all the willpower she has to not snap her head back to that oh-so-familiar voice. A smile crawled onto her lips but she never stopped trudging because if she stops, she'll never have the heart to leave. The sight of Taeyeon will make her crumble.
"FANY WAIT!" Ignored.
"WE'LL MEET AGAIN!"
She originally didn't want her to come but now that she did, an un-known puny smile painted her face.
Until next time, Taetae.
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Author's note: The next chapter will be the last, I think. Unless there's a change in my mind. >< I should be reviewing but oh well. LOLOL.