The weeks in November began to roll by with a smile on my face and a slight wedge put between me and everyone I knew. I threw myself further into my track and school work, determined to do well in my races and get amazing grades. It didn't keep the constant nightmares at bay, but it was enough to keep me busy.
I still hung out with Mason and Emery, but it was a little more sparingly and a little more quiet on my end. In those times we'd go out places, I could see Irene watching me from a distance. At the mall, the movies, a random park... she didn't talk to me but it was unsettling to see her.
It made me wonder how she couldn't understand that just because she found me, didn't mean that all of a sudden, things would go back to the way they were. It wasn't how life worked.
In the last week of November, Linda decided to do some early Christmas shopping and asked if I wanted to tag along. By then, Christmas lights were up and the scent of pine needles and peppermint made more frequent appearances. I said yes, taking delight in the season and wanting to get gifts for Mason and my friends. Things felt as if they were calming down, but it was almost an eerie calm, like one before a storm. However, any kind of calm was one I'd take as it didn't come quite often.
Linda drove quietly, music from the radio filling the car. I mentally listed things I needed to get for people, knowing I'd have to sneak off to get something for Linda, Jay and Lorraine, or come back another time to do it.
As we shopped, Linda made light chatter about various topics, and what she'd need for her gift giving. That was until she turned suddenly and said, "Have you heard from Irene lately?"
"No," I said. While I had seen her, we didn't communicate and I'd like to keep it that way.
"Okay, just wanted to check. I know we haven't really talked about what happened," Linda began.
"I'm fine. It happened and it's over," I said flatly. Linda nodded and gave me a soft smile.
"What do you say we get those giant mall pretzels and apple cider once we're done here?" she asked. I smiled and nodded.
"I'll never say no to either of those," I replied, making her smile widen.
***
Christmas break was coming up on the Thursday before Christmas – a week before the wonderful winter holiday. The excitement of being off from school seemed to be slightly shadowed however, by Linda announcing on Tuesday morning that our house was habitable once again. We would be moving back that night.
This both relieved and terrified me. Maybe the distance would be good in a twisted way... It would allow me to be the horrible person I was, and further distance myself from everyone.
But with the distance came being alone and leaving me with my thoughts and memories. Being alone would lead to emotions that I didn't know I could handle feeling. And that terrified me.
"Want to go to the music store after school?" I asked Mason on Tuesday morning, after Linda's announcement.
"Sure," Mason said with a small smile. It almost makes my heart physically ache when I noticed this way his eyes lit up at the offer before he curbed his joy with a nonchalant response. I knew I'd been incredibly distant the past few weeks and while I felt awful, it was the way it had to be.
I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around his torso. He paused, hesitant and surprised for a moment before engulfing me in his arms. We stood like that for a few moments, then I felt him softly press his lips against my forehead. I smiled and looked up at him.
"We should go. We're going to be late," I mumbled. He nodded with a slight frown.
"I miss you Charlie," he whispered. I felt tears well up in my eyes so I looked down again as I blinked them away.
"I'm sorry," was all I could respond with. I quickly hugged him tighter and then let go of him. As I let go of him, I felt a pang in my chest and a slight chill wash over my body – the absence of his warmth. I bit my lip and turned around before he could see all that I was feeling translated on my face.
I missed him too and it ripped me apart to push him away.
But it was better for him though he didn't know it yet.
I picked my backpack up, tightened my messy ponytail then pulled on my boots and jacket. Once Mason was ready we left the house; another quiet car ride waiting for us. The thought made me frown as I opened the car door, but I slid into my seat nonetheless.
***
"Okay, what is with you?" Emery asked. It was finally the end of the day and I watched as she threw her books into her locker.
"The Holy Spirit," I said with a sarcastic smile. She glared at me, making me sigh. "Nothing is with me. I'm perfectly fine."
"Charlie. I know you far too well to buy that," she frowned. "It's like you're here, but you're not here. What's going on?" I swallowed hard at that before forcing a neutral facial expression to wash over me.
"Nothing," I shrugged.
"You've been lying through your teeth for over a month," she huffed.
"I'm fine!" I said sternly. "I, uh.. I gotta go." I adjusted my bag on my shoulder and turned around.
"Don't be like that Charlie," she called as I walked away. I didn't turn around and she didn't chase me.
As I strode down the hallway, I noticed Mason waiting for me near the front of the school. When I got there, I quickly took his hand with a small hello.
"Are you okay?" he asked, observing my facial expression. I nodded.
"Just a little disagreement with Emery. It's nothing big," I shrugged. Mason nodded and squeezed my hand gently.
"I'm sure it will blow over soon," he said. I hadn't given him any details so I knew he wasn't sure what else to say. I smiled anyway.
"Thank you," I replied and we started walking toward the door.
Just as we were about to step through the door, Tiffany made her way to Mason and pulled him away from me.
"Hey Mason," she cooed, flipping her hair over her shoulder. I rolled my eyes and decided that when Mason lost his new accessory, he could come meet me outside. I pushed the door open and immediately, a bucket on top of it – which I'd failed to see – tipped over and spilled its contents on my head. A sticky, black substance covered me and I could hear Tiffany's laughter as well as the other onlookers in the hall.
I felt my blood boil and I turned to face Tiffany. Before I could give her a piece of my mind, I heard the irritated voice of Mr. Fenby.
"Miss Ross! Clean this mess up right this minute or you have detention for a week!" he yelled.
Uh, last time I checked this wasn't my fault?
"But I didn't –"
"I don't want to hear it!" he snapped and stormed away.
I glared at Tiffany and stepped towards her. Pettily, I put a goo-covered hand on her shoulder and gave her a sarcastic smile like I was talking to a toddler. She frowned deeply as my hand made contact with her shoulder.
"I have no clue what your deal is, but you need to stop acting like an immature fourth grader and just come right out and say it," I said, making sure to sound it out so she could understand.
Tiffany picked my hand off her shoulder like it was a piece of garbage and gave me her fakest laugh. It was so sickly sweet it made me want to vomit.
"I don't know what you mean," she said before eying my messy clothes. "But what I do know is that your outsides finally match your soul."
I could feel my face heat in anger and embarrassment, but part of me was a little sad. We used to be such great friends and now she was fixated on torturing me. The worst part was that I didn't know what I did and have no clue how to fix it.
"Alright," I glared at her. "I'm done. I'm done with you and your petty games and insults."
"The look on your face doesn't say so," she smirked. I rolled my eyes and walked away to go get some paper towels.
I could hear Mason's footsteps behind me but I didn't turn around. I stopped at the custodial closet and got a roll of paper towel and a mop.
"Charlie, let me help you," Mason said. I glanced to see him holding out a hand.
"You couldn't have helped me back there?" I asked bitterly. Mason's eyes widened.
"I wasn't quite sure what you wanted me to do there Charlie. You were both arguing," he said.
"Well you could have removed the succubus from your arm for starters," I mumbled. His mouth twitched upward in the corners and I frowned. "It's not funny!"
"It's a little cute that you're jealous, but there's no reason to be," he smiled. "I'm sorry, I should have. I was a little distracted at the fact that you had random substances being dumped onto you."
"Okay," I said, my face turning hot again.
"I would hug you but..." Mason started. I gave him a small laugh and we started walking back to the mess to clean it up.
***
When we finally got home, I went straight to the shower, careful not to be seen by a parent. The last thing I needed to do was to be grilled on what happened. After soaking my clothes and dressing in leggings and an oversized hoodie, I threw my ruined clothes in the laundry.
I went into the living room and saw Mason sitting there.
"I'm assuming you don't want to go to the music store anymore," he stated. I sat down beside him and nodded in defeat.
"You read my mind," I said, picking up the remote. I tucked my feet under me and turned the television on.
We were silent for a while. I almost thought that Mason had fallen asleep, but then he spoke.
"I feel like I did something wrong."
_______
Author's Note: Aw Mason 🥺 I hope you liked this chapter! Another one will be out shortly! Let me know what you think will happen next!