Chapter One
The blank document appears on my computer screen, the blinking line demanding to be moved. I press my toe against the carpeted ground and swivel the chair back and forth.
'I, Riley Brenton, have done many interesting things in life.' As soon as those words appear, I hold the backspace button until they're gone.
Let's be completely honest, I, Riley Brenton, have done nothing interesting in the whole seventeen years I've been alive.
Never traveled anywhere worth talking about, never kissed a boy, or some heroic gesture worth writing about. What's the point in writing the assignment?
I bang my head on the keyboard and the computer spazzes out as random letters races across the screen.
"Are you still working on that assignment?"
Lucy crosses her arms and leans on the doorframe.
"Yeah, cause I have no idea what to write."
"Just make something up." She shrugs.
"I can't just make something up."
"Then embellish some details about something."
"Luc, I'm not like you, I'm not interesting."
"You're heaps interesting."
"Totally." I sigh.
I rest my elbow on the desk and slide my fingers through my blonde hair. The stupid blinking line makes me groan.
She snatches the notebook from the desk and flips it open.
"Give that back."
I reach for the notebook, but she bounces back and grins.
"Is this your diary? I bet there's something in here that can help."
"Lucy, please." I pout.
"Someone needs to help you," she mutters.
I flop against the chair and groan.
She flips through the pages until she settles on one. Her brows knit together as her eyes dart across the page.
"And I count the days passing by," she murmurs.
My heart hammers as I leap off the chair.
"Damn it, Lucy, just give me the notebook."
She snaps the book shut and passes it back.
"Those lyrics are beautiful. I wish you'd play them for me."
I hug the notebook to my chest and stare at the ground.
"It's not you, Lucy. I can't sing in front of anyone."
"I'm not anyone, though. I'm your bestest friend in the whole entire world."
"Which is why I can never sing for you. I don't want you to be the one that tells me I have a terrible voice. Then I'd need the ground to really open up and swallow me whole."
"Riley." She sighs. "If you learn anything from this assignment, it's that you should take a risk once in awhile. You complain about being boring and wanting to be someone else, but you don't change anything about your life. Wishing for something won't make it happen."
"Lucy." I gasp.
"As your best friend, I felt I needed to say something."
I drop into my chair and shove the notebook into one of the drawers.
"What are you doing here?"
"I'm going on a date." She smiles.
Lucy launches herself onto my bed and snuggles into a pink cushion with 'princess' written on it. She props herself up and twirls a strand of hair around her index finger.
"Where's the date and when are you going?"
"Friday, and just to the movies."
"Sounds like a nice night."
"Yeah, but it's not enough time to plan an outfit."
"Oh, the absolute drama!" I tease.
"That's because you don't understand how an outfit can change everything."
"Mm, yeah."
"I'm tossing up between three dresses." Lucy launches into pros and cons for each dress. I lean back in my chair and stare at the musical poster on my wall.
"So, what do you think?"
"Um, the first dress."
"Really?"
"Yeah." I tug on a smile.
She looks at her phone and sighs.
"It's getting late and I should let you finish your assignment." Lucy shuffles to the end of the bed and jumps up. "Good luck with your assignment! I'll see you tomorrow, bright and early."
"So late as always."
"Yup." She laughs.
She wanders to the doorway and peers over her shoulder.
"If you ever want someone to listen to your music, you know I'm always here for you. All it takes is a second of courage. Be brave, Rils."
"Thanks."
With a grim, yet hopeful smile, she says, "Good luck."
Once she's gone, I face the computer and glare.
Despite Lucy's harsh words, she's right. I'm a coward with my head stuck in the damn clouds. I need to be brave, to be fearless for even a second.
I exit out of the document and open the recording software.
The red recording button stares me down, so I hover the cursor over the close button.
What was I thinking?
"Be fearless," I mutter.
I grab my guitar and hit the record button.
'Recording' flashes in red and my entire body freezes. I hit the stop button and lean the guitar against my desk.
"Riley," I grumble. "You need to do this, you have to."
I restart it and take a deep breath. I can do this. I am cool, calm and confident. Because, I, Riley Brenton am going to face this fear.
I strum the metal cords and a soft melody hums around me. As I dive into the music, the nerves float away. When I hit the lyrics, I open my mouth and force it out.
"She didn't know if she belonged to the sand of the sea, but she found herself standing in-between." I pause. "As she was afraid of the ocean and the way it might consume her."
I don't realise I've finished until my eyes focus on the blinking light. I end the recording and put the guitar down. I hit the play button and cringe at the sight of my face.
Come on, what is my face doing? Where are there so many lines? I look like I'm being tortured by something. Ugh. I could never show Lucy this video, let alone post it anywhere. Welp, not with my face in it at least.
I could have a slideshow or a picture of a beach?
Ugh, what am I doing? Could I actually post this online?
My phone pings and I leap from fright. There's a message from Lucy, so I open it.
'What about this dress?' There's an attachment of a cute mini white dress, a mask with feathers, shoes and makeup ideas. She's probably been scrolling through Pinterest or something.
'Looks super cute!' I type back.
I zone in on the mask and smile. For once, Lucy, you're a bloody genius! I race to my wardrobe and dig through the clothes shoved at the back. In a plastic bag is an old dance costume with a mask.
It's purple mask with purple glitter and feathers poking up the top. Before school got hectic, I took dance on the weekend. It's where Lucy and I met when we were six.
I slip the mask on and nod. It does a decent job covering my face. Heck, I wouldn't recognise myself with this on.
I return to my computer and settle in the chair. I take a deep breath and start again.
This time, the girl in the video vibrates confidence and talent. She isn't afraid of the world, or what people might say. I wish I could be her without the mask. Maybe one day it'll be me.
I exit the program and open the word document because I still need to write this damn assignment. I open YouTube and there's suggestions of other people singing. Their videos have tons of views and lovely comments from users. I wish that was me.
Lucy's voice dances through my mind. I need to stop wishing and actually do something.
Somehow I click on the 'upload video' button and select the file. My entire body shakes as it uploads. I can still back out of this. Lucy said to be brave, not a flipping idiot.
What if people don't like my voice or the song? What if they leave negative comments? What if nobody cares to watch the video? I'm not sure which alternative option is the worst.
The video finishes and my heart just about explodes. I jump up and pace the length of my room.
I could post the video and delete it after twenty-four hours. That's kind of brave, right? Or I could delete everything and go back to my safe little bubble, wishing I was one of those girls. I'm tired of wishing, and I've already come this far.
Taking a deep breath, I hit publish and close my eyes. The page reloads and I quickly exit it. The cursor hovers over the chrome icon, but I flick the word document open.
"I, Riley Brenton, am somewhat, impractical, impulsive and completely invisible to the world. But one day, things will change because the world is unpredictable and I'm ready for things to change."
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