I woke to pain and a mass of darkness. My body had been tossed onto the dirt floor like I was nothing more than a rag doll. Unconsciously, my fingers had wrapped around the teddy bear's worn body sometime while I was floating in the sea of nothingness.
I wondered why they hadn't taken it from me before throwing me into this cursed pit. I didn't think it was because they felt bad for the young woman who still carried around a toy with her.
Carefully, I touched the spot where Meara had shot me. From the positioning of the bandages that someone had taken the time to apply, the bullet had taken a chunk out of my side.
It didn't really matter now. I was going to die somehow: whether it was from starvation, hanging, or something worse.
Now that I had taken stock of everything, I started to notice that darkness more. It seemed to crouch closer, stealing my air and my hope.
Why had I been put in here of all the places? Was it because I had fought back?
I thought about the others to distract myself from the consuming blackness. I pictured Diane's face with her little slightly upturned nose and freckles. I painted Andie's features on the unseen wall with my mind, using thick dark lines to symbolize her inner turmoil.
Of Matthew, I allowed myself to remember his conviction for the cause he had fought for all his life, to remember how elegant of a speaker he was but how bad he was about interacting with just one person.
By the time I had exhausted my inventory of everyone I had ever known, I didn't know how much time had passed me by. I didn't know how long I had laid on that dirt floor unconscious; I didn't know how long I had managed to distract myself from where I was.
The darkness came even closer, spreading its feather-like touch across my ankles. It purred like a cat, daring me to trust it, to give myself up to it.
I tried to shove it away before remembering that I was fighting against an intangible enemy. Instead I chose to run my fingers across every inch of my body, making sure that I was still alive.
Sleep became my escape. I let my dreams bear me further and further away until my reality and my fantasy became blurred.
Every time I woke up, I found myself a little fonder of the darkness that had consumed the remainder of my life. It started to creep closer, realizing that my defenses were coming down.
After what had to be days, I was coated in grime. I could taste the dirt in the back of my throat every time I breathed. It stole the moisture from my tongue, and it shielded me like an inadequate suit of armor.
When a stream of light finally entered the black pit, I wasn't quite sure whether I was relieved or unhappy.
"Get up," an Enforcer said, snatching my arm and yanking me to my feet.
I didn't fight him, not because my strength was gone, but to give him a whiff of my underarm when his too-hard of a pull brought it level with his nose.
His nose crinkled slightly, but his training didn't allow him to loosen his grip on my arm. That was a pity because I was hoping for a stronger reaction.
"So, where are we off to?" I asked after several minutes of being hauled down hallways as if I was nothing more than a sack of flour being delivered to a baker. "You know, I'd like to know if I'm dying today or just being interrogated or something else."
"None of the above," my wonderful Enforcer companion answered in what he probably supposed was a neutral tone of voice. "I'm delivering you to your much-needed bath."
I blinked, wondering if I had heard him wrong. "Is that now standard procedure for all condemned prisoners? Did someone complain about the smell of the corpses because I'm pretty sure that everyone smells after they die?"
"It's not standard procedure. It's for the benefit of Enforcement's reputation tomorrow when our leader pardons you rather than having you killed."
Yeah, he was definitely annoyed with me, but I was really annoyed with him too.
Just as I was getting my thoughts together, he opened a door and shoved me into the waiting arms of another Enforcer, this time female.
"I want to know why I'm being used in this way!" I demanded of her. "I want to know why I was chosen and not someone else!"
Her eyes widened slightly, and she took a step back unconsciously. "I don't know what you mean."
"Why do they need to grant someone amnesty from among my group?"
"Two of the people within your little so-called Igniters released documents into the hands of the public that have painted Enforcement in a bad light. By pardoning you for the crimes you have committed against Cineres, we will show them we're not as cruel and unforgiving as they believe us to be."
I took a deep breath. "I don't want the amnesty. I would rather die than allow myself to be living proof for Enforcement to hide more lies behind.
"I know what you do to all those children when their parents break the Founding Law. I have seen what you've done to people who speak against you. I have heard about all the deaths you have a hand in and cover up. I have found out the ways that you seek to control us even more. I will not be the spokesperson for the 'generosity of Enforcement.'"
"I have my orders," the Enforcer said simply. "They come from far above me, and to disobey means that my life, along with others', will be forfeit."
This confirmed my thoughts on who the leader of this twisted Enforcement was. It made me realize exactly why I had been chosen.
"I will consent to a bath," I started, letting each word roll slowly off my tongue, "if and only if my friends are permitted to clean up as well. If the kindness of our government can be shown so well n just one young woman, how much more would it increase with three other people?"
The idea set a spark blazing in her eyes, and she yanked open the door, speaking quietly but rapidly to a person that remained unseen.
Once the conversation had concluded, she nodded once towards me before pointing towards a curtained-off area. I allowed a small smile to grace my face as I turned and walked to where she had indicated.
My dearest Luke,
Perhaps you would have insisted that I take the chance offered to me, but I'm ready. I'm ready to confront the truth. I'm ready to save those I have grown to love. I'm ready to show the world that change is possible.
I don't believe that your sister can call me selfish any longer. If I was truly selfish, I would have taken the opportunity that was laid in front of my face and ran with it.
Instead, I have given the Igniters a second chance. No matter what happens tomorrow, I know that Matthew will continue to fight. This cause is the only thing keeping him alive, just like me, but for different reasons.
I don't know how he's going to live after devoting so much of his life to this cause. I hope Meara and he are able to support each other after the end of this. They need each other so much, but they don't see it, much like we didn't.
I love you, my Luke, and whether I join you tomorrow or not, I don't think it will ever diminish. Lend me all your strength and bravery tomorrow.
I fear I shall need it.
Lane
★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★★
Hello,
Yes, it's me, and I have something to say. Whether you realize it or not, there are currently two things that will be revealed in the next chapter. I'm offering you, the reader, a chance to prove how good you are at picking up hints.
I would like you to tell me your answers to these two massive importantly reveals before the next chapter is published.
The first is who is the leader of Enforcement? No, this isn't a trick question. While you may not feel many hints have been dropped, I did let a huge one out in a previous chapter. I won't tell you which one though.
The second is what did Ilania tell Luke before he died? Again, this doesn't seem important or easy to figure out, but I have confidence that at least one of you will get close.
Depending on how this goes, I will have some reward in store for you. If someone gets really close on one or both of the answers, we will discuss what the prize will be. You will have as many chances to change your guesses as you like.
Good luck, and know you have until at least Thursday to think on it.
Abigail