Chapter 25
Influx With Past
Davidson's pov
While I was scared enough to piss in my pants, Shyna smirked and the coach stood emotionless on the door, his firm broad body looking more intimidating that the figure should.
"I.. I .. sorry." I stuttered "It was like Shyna was missing." I tried to explain.
But he stopped me.
"Five minutes and twenty rounds of basket ball court, a second late and you are fired." He said sternly.
I get a chance. I get a chance
I danced internally with joy and sprinted towards the basket ball courts to take another round of punishment.
For the first time in two days have I been punished for same reason because of Shyna but I am still glad that she is okay now.
The way she was smirking at me I knew she was back from her dark lines and there she sat on the stands in my lucky no.10 tee.
I winked in her direction and she smiled.
Oh!!! How freaking beautiful that smile is. It takes all my stress and tiredness away. It feels like sipping a whole glass of Gatorade.
Since my t-shirt was wet with sweat I went to her to wear another one coz my bag was laying besides her.
I stood in front of her and she stopped her work that she was doing in her laptop. Her eyes scanned my body with no emotions to display.
Had it been any other girl she'd have drooled over my perfect abs.
Shall I feel offended for this?
The way she looked at me was like she was fighting with her inner thoughts which were more of turmoil.
I rolled my shirt and was about to throw at her but I didn't, I wouldn't. Ever.
I smirked at the way she flinched being hit by smelly sweaty tee that never reached her.
Instead I folded my tee and kept it in the laundry section of my bag.
Her widened eyes gave the complimented she sealed into her mouth.
I pulled in the nike tumbler from my bag to drink water but unfortunately due to the scorching heat and high humidity levels I had exhausted the last drop of water.
I was valuing the options between getting water from myself from the coolers that was at the at the other end corner of the courts.
I was tossing the bottle when Shyna gesticulated showing her pointer moving her lips that said 'one minute'
She grabbed my bottle and sprinted towards the coolers.
Curiosity taking over me, I bent to check what she was doing on her notebook and I gasped at what I saw on the screen.
It was some 'Angel's sight...
The headlines saying "Another Rape unsuccessful"
Don't just sit and watch. Fight back!!! was the tagline.
I could not help but scroll the cursors to see what exactly the site was meant for. It somehow did not give any positive feeling. All the negative vibes were flowing through the light of the screen wallpaper that was of a fiery girl dipped in blood.
It stated about incidents or revenges, some rape cases that were forged or terminated without damage.
Then there was a mention or an invitation that if you were bullied, abused, assaulted or even raped or anything close, you could simply click on the orange button.
Shit! Shit! Shit!
What was Shyna doing at this site?
Why does she ever need any one?
Did she think of pressing the button?
Damn this site can be fake. A trap...
My hand reached my forehead wiping off the sweat drops that had formed not due to the work out but due to the negative heated energy that this site was portraying.
"You cannot afford another punishment for missing practice nor can you dehydr.." Shyna said behind me and snatched her computer from my hands, not all happy of the fact that was entering in her private reign.
"Shyna what the..." I was about to say but was again interrupted by my coach who stared at me like a prey staring at its predator.
I joined the team for further practice without looking at the coach for one of his hilarious comment. He had already passed couple of them since morning lke kind of exercises that I"d be doing for my perfect body; mind it in the bed ones with no clothes on or my body coukd be more of a treat as fashion magazine model rather than a basket ball player.
I on the contrary was not open to his mocking comments that were meant for harmless amusement of our team as I was too absorbed by the site that Shyna was working on..
"Focus" for the fifteenth time did my coach shout at me but my vision was blurred with the violent fiery girl whose picture was the caption head of the site Shyna was working on.
After being dismissed from the days run out and the training, I skipped the dinner taking Shyna to our room.
She was troubled with my sudden domination as all the time I was silent with my soggy mood. She did turn up to me, tried to cheer me up, begged me to focus on the game but I simply couldn't
"I need an answer." I shouted holding my head in both my hands or it would burst.
A layer of confusion creased on Shyna's face. Least was she expecting that was coming to her.
"What are you doing logging on to that filthy site Fight back?" I asked angrily, my voice crossing three rooms down from ours.
"None of your business." She spat occupying herself in a task of tidying the room that she'd never done before. The way she picked up things, I did not fail to notice the shiver in her hands, her legs crimpling worrying for the worst.
Her body language clearly stating that she wasn't prepared to talk about the same
I pulled her arms making her to concentrate on what I had to say.
"What is all that? What is it that takes you to that damn dark world that you forget that there is life? Why are you absurd?" I asked her, my grip on her tight enough to create a bruise but she didn't flinch.
She stared back at me, least intimidated with my anger, her fierce shade back as she shouted "Leave me."
"NO I won't" I shouted back.
She looked straight into my eyes and then after some time, may be she realized I wasn't giving up and she probably thought of reconciling into her same bitchy self once again, shutting doors to all the outsiders and started yelling "Listen David I am here as your coach and I can shout and accuse you for assault and then you'll be ruined, your career will be finished, so drop it." her words hurting me deep.
I was hurt but I wasn't yet to give up on her so I smirked "Go ahead, shout. I know you won't. You care far too much to do that."
She turned her expressions all of a sudden as to state of shock; a bit vulnerable too but I could see she hated this part of her.
"You..." she raised her pointer.
"Try it Shyna. You are good only to harm yourself. You do not have an evil bone in your body." I teased. I knew it was leading to wrong reaction but I needed that, I wanted her to open up or I'll also get buried into her mysterious darklines.
He gave a stern fierce stare commanding me to shut my mouth up and I was still pumping her hard and wild to reach the depth of her memories.
I don't know why but I wanted to. I was seeing her suffering each day, every night. The way she disappears into her imaginary world, pain smudging her face and hurt in her eyes, I felt I cannot see it any longer and now with the site if she dares to log in then she might put herself into big trouble.
Damn it was illegal.
I tried to provoke her "You try to be strong and powerful; hell you are but only to hurt yourself. You can work out beyond limits enough to bleed and punish yourself for something you did not do. You can fight like a warrior but when it comes to me" I passed a sarcastic small laugh "you fight me or hit only to the extent that you can. You are too soft hearted, too good a soul to hurt me and try to hit strokes that do not hurt me. You are too good, too innocent for others good. All you can harm is yourself. Your goodness overpowers your actions. You are one good soul.
"Stop you." She shouted with all the strength she had in her and said
"Good soul..." she chuckled humorlessly "You are wrong David, all my good bones are crumpled. I am nothing but evil, helpless hopeless evil. I am a dead person because my good bones have been crushed, burned and mutilated by three guys, three men. THREE DEMONs who raped me multiple number of times turning me into nothing but a self destructing wreck.
Five months of continuous torture in that dark room is what that has made me what I am today, a scrap shit of a pile that gets up every morning with the feeling of being dirty.
Five bloody months... Five months that took the devil inside me to be born...
Those five months of agony when I had lost the count of number of times being raped.
Five months when I surrendered to my own pain and opened my f##king legs to those three monsters to get what they wanted without any fight.
I gave up my sanity not able to bear the pain any longer. But you know what? It was later that I realized that the physical pain was nothing than the pain that I was surrenderingmyself to by tainting my soul, by giving up my sanity, by letting myself being raped.
Do you understand what is Rape?
Shyna's pov...
I should have kept quite, I should have sealed my lips but the words were flowing out of my mouth.
I had lost control. I knew he was doing nothing but provoking the truth out of me and I was hiding my vulnerable self which I knew was needed. But this time, he'd gone bit too far. He tried to show he cared and worst he expected me to care...
I cant..
I DO NOT CARE
I am a dead person alive..
And when I saw the truth, the dirty fact of my life affected him hard and harsh, his determined expression turned into grim, I knew he was hurt. I wanted to hurt him more. If not with my feisty action or blows, I wanted to hurt him with my words.
Gosh!!!! What an evil I am turning into.
I wanted to derive pleasure of vengeance by hurting him.
But did he deserve it?
No I was too blind with my agony to know the answer
But if I do not do it, I will burst. So I shout at him, I try to hurt him more, to the extend that he cannot take it further and that hurt was satisfying my urge of rebel.
The negative- the evil in my inner self empowered and wanted vengeance..
At what cost!!!
So I added venom to my tone
"Do you know what rape is?
It is a curse. It kills you step by step, slowly and steadily.
It burns you, your skin, the layers beneath your skin, your soul, but the f##king thing is YOU are still alive.
You feel like scrapping your body, hell I am even ready to burn my self if it could blow way like fumes the feel of the filthy touch of those calamitous
It is like thousands of needles being pierced inside you, languidly.
You cry in pain and the doer enjoys your pain.
You hate yourself each day, each minute, each second for letting them do what they did, for not escaping out, for bloody going to that place, that one place a girl is forbidden to go alone, the place that changed everything that you had been taught since childhood
The wicked, cunning, outrageous laugh of pleasure rings into your ears like loud drums from hell.
F##k calls from hell would be a better choice, Death would be a better remedy but guess what I have LIFE.
I have to live. I cannot die.
God!!! Let me die!!! Let this pain be erased.
But no you cannot, all you are left is with agony and the feeling that says that You are DIRTY. I am DIRTY
How much so ever I try and wash that dirt, it seems to be dirtier, even my blood fails to wash that dirt off my body.
Got it!!! I am not good and I am going to be bad and feisty because I have HAD enough, no shit Guy can ever F##king invade my life."
The last line being a huge warning and I never let my eyes away from his face, the tiny drop of tear that flew down from his eyes moving down slowly as his body gave up, I couldn't believe what I was seeing.
My words had worked more than I thought they would.
They had touched him deep.
He is a guy and he is crying..
He was crying for me, he was crying for the deeds of others, he was crying because he did not believe that this was ever possible. He did not believe that such evils existed in the bloody society
I felt the last string of my courage breaking up and I managed to say "Got it what you wanted to hear?"
My mission was accomplished; his soul was shattered with the influx of my past.
And I knew I had spoken a bit too much, I had lived those five months again, the invisible wounds I got during those five months were not yet healed, but the bleeding had ceased but my words, my narration to him had scrapped them and then applied salts to them burning them more and then I did what I could not refrain myself to do.
I did not want to do it. But I did.
I tried to stop myself but the acidic liquid had reached the rim and so I cried.
With a loud shriek, I cried, it was not a sob, but a cry.
I slumped on the floor trying to grab my face in my hands; I could not face him anymore.
I felt even dirtier as I narrated the entire incident to him.
Hell!! I wanted to live my life in this month, I wanted to feel normal, I wanted to assume only for a month that what all happened in the past was a night mare but NO Destiny has lot more trials in store for me.
David moved from his place. I knew he loathed me now, he'd pack his bag and leave the tournament and go back.
His desire of neat, clean, healthy and hygienic environment, his phobia of perfection will take him miles away from me.
Maybe he is repenting for the very decision of provoking me to speak for 'Ignorance was better than the curse.
And do I care??
No I am too feeble to care.
He stood up wiped his face and sat besides me amicably he was decent enough to bid final words of good bye or may be he would ask me to leave for the first thing in the morning.
But what he did metamorphosed my perception about men.
He sat shoulder to shoulder besides me, waiting for my reaction but I had turned too cold to react.
Then he cupped my face in his hands and gave me a small peck on my forehead. I let him do it. I was too drained off my energy to push him, to repulse against his actions or probably the innocent/hurt look on his face which said things I did not ever believe that guys had in them specially being cheated by the most trusted Male' in my life. I simply waited for his reaction.
He did not utter a word.
His silence was louder than any other speech.
He lifted me and took me to the bed. His body was shivering too.
I knew he too was dramatized, scared, shaken and withdrawn from the virtuosities of life with what he heard.
He too needed comfort but I didn't know that he was deriving it from me.
He hugged me tight like a baby kangaroo hugs her mother and laid on the bed with the two of us closing our heavy eyelids breathing soft breath that felt like each breath needed an effort to be taken.
He then opened his eyes in synchrony with mine and looked into my eyes for a while.
His grays weren't asking any questions nor weren't they showing any emotions; happy or sad. They only said that for the time being he was there and we both needed each other.
Soon our eyes felt like stones and we both went for somnolence.
I thought next morning would be different. We both would be different persons, different individuals bounded to live under the similar roof till David manages to shift me to another room or I manage to get my tickets for back home.
Instead it was like any normal day, David woke up early. I sizzled under the covers, the warmth that I felt was now gone and I was feeling cold as the conditioning was on its maximum speed.
The aroma of strong coffee invigorated my nostrils sprucing me up for a bright morning light as the sun was overhead with curtains now fully open.
The room was cleaned like there were no inhabitants, completely David like.
My heart was beating wildly in my chest. I knew he'd speak, talk about last night, my traumatic deal with the three monsters but still I wasn't ready for it.
I had been living those five months every hour, every second of the day but they were in my dark memories, I never wanted to speak or share them in open, Hell my mom too is oblivion about it. I had opened far too much to this person.
"Not hungry yet?" he asked bringing me out of my self thoughts.
I gulped the whole bile in my throat scratching my nose, trying to scratch away the discomfort I was having being with him, being with the person who knew the dark truth of my life fully and completely. I doubt if I opened these secrets even to my therapists. I had blocked my doors to them for repeating what happened every time would only infuriate me, make me feel helpless, used and weak.
If I could not die, if I had to live than I was not going to live like a weak person and so I had to change and I therefore started by changing my habitat by moving around here leading a life like a nerd, obnoxious nerd, oblivion to world around, be strong physically because gaining mental strength was not possible now. My personality as a nobody was my only strength.
And David, he stole that very strength of mine.
Ofcourse he behaved like a thorough gentleman, a good human last night but that was his sympathy that my past might have ignited.
I had no energy to repeat the past or to discuss the matter again with him so I avoided eye contact with him, hiding my hands and limps in the covers as if that would make me invisible.
"I thought you prefer it hot." He asked again bringing the mug too close to my hands to finally hold it.
"I was starving." He said casually sipping the sip of coffee like we were two normal people communicating over the morning chit chat.
I kept silent.
Silence is golden
Atleast it turned out golden last night.
"Shyna I think you can use the washroom and I'll change here in the room so that we can reach on time and I can evict punishment today too." He said gesturing with his hands.
Did I breathe a sigh of relief?
I did. He was not opening up last night. He wasn't judging me. He was back to where we stood when we arrived here.
Or is he having hallucinations???
No I am dreaming......
A/n
Picture of the site on the right(warning: don't see if you are soft hearted)
So guys what do you say?
Is David taking her past that easy?
Or
It is only one of Shyna's dreams?
Please express your views on the story. I know this chapter touches a very delicate part of the society.
Sorry to say but with the increasing number of cases I cannot claim that this is only a story where in there are many girls as Shyna crying out there.
Would awareness help?????
We all need an Angel out there...
But how many?
And which all parts of the world?
Comment" and """"VOTE"""" for an early upload*