2 4
A C I D I F Y I N G
I woke up with a sudden jolt and rubbed my eyes. The speed breaker was unexpected and Luke had forgotten to step on the brake. Realising that I was awake, Luke smiled at me and mumbled an apology to which I laughed and replied, "Good Morning."
"It's actually eight and the sky is dark. What ever made you greet me a good morning?" Luke chuckled.
"'Cause I just woke up?"
Luke laughed and shook his head. He smiled and informed me, "You look beautiful when you sleep."
I faked offence at that statement and gasp as Luke roared out laughing again. I shouted as I pulled down the window, "I look crappy. You're probably blind."
"No, I'm not and you are beautiful."
The pre existing blush deepened and I hit my head on the dashboard, "You're hopeless."
"You make me hopeless."
"Just shut up and drive."
The sky around us was almost breathtakingly. The Stars twinkled above us and the moon lit up the sky brightly. Every night was a different experience – with no sexual innuendo intended – and I truly yearned to cherish it. Because you know, who knew how long each one of us were to live?
I've always believed that it was the night that made us the most vulnerable — the most transparent. The night made everyone's every word so raw and truthful and often, it was a mixed set of reaction one truly gets.
You could be chatting with your best friend whom you've had a crush on since fourth grade at one in the morning and his every sweet word would be the reason why you would have professed your love for him, that is if you belonged to the gutsy category of the people.
Or for people like me, who shut their mouth as they watch their crush fall in love and live life; the night would be our only companion as we cried our night away.
Either way, the night was something raw, beautiful and the night was definitely why magic was created. Needless to say that that night was the time of the day when I professed how much I loved Luke. Absolutely, with burning passion and the rawest of appreciation to each and every flaw of his.
That was what I did that night in the car. I told Luke that I loved him and that I would cherish him as long as I lived. With every cell in my body and with every fibre of my heart, I promised that I would love him and would never leave him. That was my oath that night – an oath I was willing to take.
Luke's face lit up, which eventually resulted in me being overjoyed. I was lucky here, not him. Luke was the reason why I was finally having my happily ever after. He was the reason why I didn't quit on love. He was the reason why I yearned to be free of this disease. He was the reason why I hoped I could live like this – carefree and joyous – every single day. He was the reason why I was happy and he was all that matter to me now.
"Thank you," Luke whispered after everything. My head whipped in his direction with my eyes widened.
"What ever for?"
"For everything," he told. His hands were tightly wrapped around the steering wheel as he drove the car. After another minute of broken silence, he continued, "Thank you for walking into my life. I was never good with words but I hope this one works. So, Danielle, Amor, Ellie – my world and my sunshine – thank you for everything."
On hearing that, my eyes watered. I wiped them off sloppily and yet the tears continued to pour for I was a poor hopeless romantic at heart.
"Hey, I didn't mean to make you cry."
"I know you didn't."
Luke stopped his car at the moment, parking it to the side of the road. I wiped my tears once again, hopelessly and looked at him. Luke looked forward for a moment or so and then, turning to me, he hugged me, tight as ever.
"Luke. . ."
"Hush. For once, just relax," Luke mumbled into my neck, his hot breath fanning all over it as he sent tingles down my spine.
"Okay," I mumbled and let my hands find my way around his neck and they relaxed around there just as if they found their home.
We stayed like that for a moment or so and then he pulled back, as I mumbled another thank you. Luke offered a quick smile and reignited the car and set off. Probably we were left with a journey of another half an hour or so and that's what Google Maps told us.
I put my head out of the window and looked up at the sky, gazing at it, awe-struck.
Yup, the night was still gorgeous as ever.
•••
"This is the place?"
Luke looked at me, with a weird expression on his face. He looked to his left and to his right, confused and trying to put two and two together.
"Yeah," I looked at Luke and managed to offer a smile, regardless of how guilty I felt deep inside, "This is the place I wanted to take you too."
"It feels nostalgic. Have I come here before?" Luke scratched the back of his head out of bewilderment.
"I hope not," I muttered.
Luke and I had reached Buffalo the previous night. I decided that it was better for us to stay at a lodge or a hotel till the sun broke out. Barging into someone's house at ten-thirty or eleven wasn't a good start to an everlasting relationship and in this case, a pre existent broken one.
I managed to shut my mouth till that very second. I didn't want Luke to flee to New York on hearing the news. I didn't want him to run from accepting an opportunity and if there was something I knew crystal clear, it was the love family could give.
I wanted Luke to have that.
He looked at me and with a nod of confirmation, rang the door bell. Any minute now. Any minute now hell would break lose. I fidgeted with my finger out of sheer fear of him hating me after this.
Maybe I'd risk it for him and his family.
The door swung back open and Luke's face were drained out all the colours that were already present in there. I could feel anger sailing thoroughly through his deepest realms and due to this, he was clenching and unclenching his fists.
At the door was present a moderately middle aged man. He had a striking resemblance to Luke and looked charming himself. Vincent, this must be Vincent, I thought. He was shocked himself but the intensity of happiness both of them had differed vastly.
Vincent was finally happy to have another reencounter with his son – something he wasn't able to do for a very long time. Could I say the same for Luke? No. Looking at how betrayed Luke felt every time he glanced at me, I hoped that the earth could swallow me up completely rather.
"Son," Vincent finally broke the silence by sweetly calling out to his son. Luke gave him a stink eye and muttered, "You've no right to call me a son anymore."
Vincent flinched and it was then that I realised that Vincent had keen hearing. He looked at me and offered me a pitiful smile. He looked intently at Luke and tried once again.
"Don't even try, dad. I'm standing here only because she – " Luke gestured to me and then continued, " – wanted me to come here. If not for her, I'd have never met you and would have never yearned to either."
I was mortified at the words Luke spoke to his dad. Were their relationship this bad?
"But Luke – "
Luke didn't give a second for his dad to explain, let alone a minute. He walked away to the car and entered it. Igniting the car, he drove away. Maybe to calm himself, I thought. Vincent turned to look at me and my head dropped gently suddenly.
"I'm sorry, sir," I still looked down at my feet. I barely had the guts to look ta him. I brought back the misery into Luke's life since my attempt was an obvious failure and Vincent was heartbroken all over again.
"Don't be, child," Luke's dad spoke and I lifted my head to look up at him. He smiled slightly. "Do come in for a tea or a coffee."
I bit my lips gently and nodded my head, muttering a small thank you note. The house was elegant, luxurious and felt like home. No matter how rich Vincent was, the house never exposed his monetary state.
A beautiful woman walked into us after that. Her blonde hair cascaded down her back delicately and she walked like a model herself. With fragile features, the woman seemed extremely delicate. She must be the infamous Claudia.
She looked at me for a second, confused and then turned to her husband and mouthed, "Who is she?"
"Dia, she's –" Vincent stammered. I realised then that we hadn't ever officially exchanged our names. I was supposed to know him as Luke's father and he was supposed to know me as Luke's friend.
"Hello," I finally decided to take the introductions up on me. "I'm Danielle, a very close friend of Luke's."
I expected Claudia to pale a bit since someone related to her husband's past was hunting them down technically. Instead, she smiled. She smiled so wide, as if her eyes showed genuine love and care. She seemed nice.
"I'm Claudia, darling," she smiled and took hold of my hand to show a close connection. "You remind me of my daughter, haha. Where's Lottie, when you need her?" With that, Claudia began calling out for Lottie to come downstairs.
I pulled slightly back and looked at her with utter astonishment and bewilderment.
She just continued smiling at me. A minute or so later, I could hear the sound of someone coming down the stairs. I put a foot backward and whipped my head slightly to look at the person coming downstairs.
"That's my daughter," Claudia explained. "Charlotte McKenna. I presume you are of her age or a year or two older." She smiled at us and I waved at Charlotte awkwardly.
"Hey."
"Hey," I replied back. Vincent by then had fled from the scene. Charlotte turned around and looked for Vincent. A minute or so later, she chased after him.
Charlotte looked at me awkwardly and I guess, I wouldn't blame her. She didn't know me and I didn't know her. Neither did we have to.
"How exactly are we related for you to come into my home?" Charlotte asked me, as she broke the silence. I liked her straight-forward attitude already, I thought.
"I came here with a guy to meet Vincent," I explained.
Charlotte's ears perked up as she heard guy and I couldn't help but laugh. She asked, feigning innocence, "Guy?"
I laughed, "Guy indeed."
"Is he cute?"
"He's your stepbrother."
Charlotte looked at me, mortified. "What? Luke?"
"So you've met your him, already," I smiled as I watched Charlotte walk forward and plop down on the sofa, tapping the spot next to her as she looked at me, gesturing me to come and sit with her.
"No," she mumbled. "I've always wanted to, you know? The prospect of having an elder brother was something amazing but my step brother so happened to hate his family. All I know about him is what Dad keeps telling."
"You call Vincent dad. That's –" I paused for a second, uncomfortably, thinking of a word to describe, "– nice?"
"You don't have to get awkward with me, Danielle. I'm fine with it. You are after all, supposed to stand for Luke here." Charlotte slightly titled her head and gave me the goofiest smile ever. I could help but feel happy. That's what Charlotte did. She made people around her shocked and surprised as she made them smile – all at the same time.
"Thanks," I smiled and bit my lip, nervously and unsure of what to say beyond that.
"You came here for what, exactly? For all I know, you could be a burglar in broad daylight, fooling my parents," Charlotte questioned, jokingly.
I laughed out loud and replied, "I told you. I came here with Luke."
"I see no Luke."
I kept my silence and restlessly fidgeted with the hem of the cardigan I was wearing.
"What's wrong?" Charlotte asked.
"He didn't want to meet you guys. I'm in fact pretty sure that he's raging at me deep within inside for pulling him here," I explained.
"I'm sorry. Did you just tell me that he didn't know you were pulling him to meet his father?" She gaped at me.
I felt a throbbing pang of guilt deep within me as she spoke. It was definitely not right of me to pull him back into his past without his very permission. I infringed his rights, when all I thought was that it would help him.
"Yeah. I don't even what to do now."
We shared a moment of silence for a moment as I looked outside their big window.
"Go after him," she broken the silence. My head quickly turned to look at Charlotte. She nodded at me and repeated, "Go after him. He could never hate you, if he let you take him this far."
My eyes widened at her words. Was what she said true? Yes. In fact, I myself knew they were true. Luke could hate but he would never. Then what was pulling me back from chasing him? My guilt.
"Okay."
"So what are you waiting for?" Charlotte got up and looked at me with a face of determination written all over it.
"Uhm," I stammered, clueless. She took hold of my hand and pulled me up. Still holding my hand, she walked forward to the main door and pulled it open. A wave fresh breeze blew past us and I sighed, taking it deep within me.
I looked outside properly and at that moment, Charlotte let go of me. The car was gone. Luke had taken the car with him. My smile quickly fell and I turned to look at Charlotte.
"The car, eh?"
"He's taken it with him." I thought twice about the situation in hand now and then spoke, "Obviously. How else could he have gone?"
Charlotte gave me a stupid look and shook her head gently. She walked forward to the parking area of her house and I followed her silently. She entered the pitch black area as I waited outside patiently for her to come back.
Charlotte came back with a bicycle next to her. I looked at her yet again with my eyes wide open out of sheer surprise. Charlotte giggled and passed the bicycle to me. She then spoke, "Use my bicycle. There's a beautiful lake made artificially here. It's about twenty or thirty metres from here. You're not backing out, okay? If you have any thoughts of doing so, I suggest you trash the thoughts already."
"Okay," I mumbled.
We looked at each other for moments together in silence until she yelled jokingly as she laughed, "Just get going already!"
"Okay okay," I raised my hands in defence. I soon got into the cycle and steadied myself on it.
"Go straight from here. You'll reach there soon enough," Charlotte guided and my hands gripped on the handles tightly.
"Bye then," she waved to me and I peddled forward. It had been years since I had got onto the bike. Mum threw away mine when she figured I could drive a car and it was much safer for my health. The feeling of driving the bike was still surreal after all these years.
Buffalo was beautiful. Ah, the patriotic feeling and the sheer pride of being born as a citizen of the state of New York! I mentally chuckled. The lush greenery all around in this area was pretty, making the ride memorable.
Halfway through the journey, I could feel a shot of pain coursing up my legs. It was paining again. It happened every time any strenuous activity was done by my poor legs. I still continued peddling on. I needed to see Luke, let alone apologise to him. The rate at which I was travelling and riding gradually decreased with the pain.
Prayers were sent to heaven as I hoped that my legs wouldn't die on me with the extreme pain, or that I wouldn't pass out. Putting on a brave smile as I tried to forget about the shocking pain and the terrible headache that was being formed, I peddled forward.
I saw Luke sitting on a bench next to the lake just as Charlotte told me he would be. He looked far into the lake. I peddled quickly to him and the sound caught Luke's attention. He whipped his head in my direction with a face that showed that he was still very much annoyed.
I dropped the bike carelessly and tried walking quickly towards Luke – the distance being only a matter of a small one or two metres.
The pain was almost getting traumatising and I feared if I would collapse or faint anytime now. Luke looked at me for a moment and opened his mouth to utter something.
The deep blue lake behind me was extremely calm. Another shot of pain courses through my legs which, this time, I sadly couldn't bear. My legs gave off and I collapsed forward in complete consciousness. Luke's eyes widened and instinctively, he wrapped his hands around me and caught me effortlessly.
I couldn't help but smile faintly. Luke cared for me so much that it made my heart swell. I looked at Luke and I saw concern wiping all the annoyance that was earlier on his face. Luke was concerned and almost looked scared.
He gently lifted me and placed me on the spot on the bench next to him. My head unknowingly dropped onto the nook of Luke's neck and it seemed that he eventually didn't mind at all.
We stayed like that in silence for a long time, looking into the lake as we tried to understand what the hell was going in our lives. The pain still soared through me but Luke's warmth was a true comfort in times like these.
"I'm sorry," I mumbled as I buried my face in Luke's chest. A ripple of chuckle vibrated off of Luke and I – still clutching onto him – looked up at him.
"You went through all that just to come here and apologise to me?" Luke questioned to which I nodded frantically.
"Don't ever do that," Luke raised his voice slightly yet there was a notable concern lacing his voice.
"B-but I am —" I rested my head on Luke's chest and closed my eyes. "The guilt was eating me alive. I caused you pain. I brought up your past. That's traumatising and the pain I felt could never come up to that emotional trauma."
"Ellie –"
"I made you face it without any warning beforehand. God, I'm such a terrible human."
The waterfalls began then. The tears cascaded down my eyes helplessly and I couldn't do anything to stop it. I clutched onto Luke's shirt tightly and cried into him, wetting his shirt in the process.
Why did I cry? Was it the pain or the emotional guilt? Maybe a bit of both. All I knew was that letting it out felt good. It felt absolutely divine. Ergo the fact that I ruined Luke's shirt in the end.
Luke comforted me as he rubbed my back again and again and again and again. He bent forward and came extremely close to my ears. My cheeks tainted a slight red as the tears still continued pouring downwards.
Luke breathed into my ears as I mumbled, "I am really really sorry. Don't hate me, please. Please, just don't hate me for this."
Luke was taken aback and I felt him look at me with his mouth wide open. Shaking his head slightly, he bent forward and gently pecked me behind my ear, sending a wave of sparks down my spine. He mumbled into my ears soon after, his voice turning husky, "I could never hate you, Ellie. I could try and still fail miserably."
His words comforted me, but since my emotions were in haywire, I ended up crying more than ever and Luke sighed, holding onto me closer. I unclenched my hands from his shirt and used it for wiping the tears off my face.
"I really am sorry for taking you here, when I knew you would hate it. I just wanted you to give them a chance," I tried explaining with my uneven escalated breathing – an after effect of all the crying.
Just as my face was still on his chest, Luke's face took in the strawberry smell of my hair. He mumbled audible enough for me to hear clearly, "You meant good. I should have given you a chance. All I did here was give myself reasons to run away."
"B-but I –"
"I'll give them – him – a chance. Thank you."
•••
"Hey, Charlotte."
"Danielle!" Charlotte soared past the corridor on seeing me and she flung herself on me. I hugged her back and smiled.
Pulling back, she looked at Luke who still felt super uncomfortable at the moment. He was meeting his step sister for the first time and he had initially seized the opportunity and had just ran away.
"Hey, Luke." Charlotte looked at Luke and smiled goofily.
"Um, hey," Luke looked around still nervous but then jerked back for a second realising that who he was now was not the real him. It reminded him once again of how vulnerable and broken hearted he had been that night when his dad left him, promising to come back with ice cream and a brand new toy car.
He never turned up. Not even a phone call.
"You wouldn't know me? How stupid of me!" Charlotte whacked herself and straightened her shirt that slightly rose up as she lifted her hand. "I'm Charlotte, your step-sister?"
"Whoa," Luke's eyes softened. Maybe it was over the fact – the news of joy and sheer happiness – that he finally did have a sister. Maybe one that he could finally try to protect. He would make it his utter most priority in that case to safeguard this woman.
"Whoa good or whoa bad?" Charlotte cringed slightly at the reaction she received.
"Whoa shocked. I have a sister?" Luke spoke it out loud. Maybe then it would be real. Cathy's presence could never be replaced, let alone be substituted by another girl but it felt nice to have one no matter what. Maybe that's what he was going to do now that he had found Charlotte.
Charlotte just smiled and nodded, "Yeah. It seems like it. I've heard so much about you from Vincent. He's always missed you and wanted to go back but he —" Charlotte stopped herself as soon as she looked at Luke. Luke had his face hung and his hands kept clenching and unclenching.
I looked at Luke and walked forward, tugging at his arm, gently. Luke's eyes flashed open as he looked at me. I smiled at him sincerely and Luke looked taken aback. I whispered lightly, audible enough only for him to hear, "You know, I'm here for you. Give them a chance."
Clearing his throat and looking at Charlotte, he asked sincerely, "Dad speaks about me?" The very usage of Dad made me smile extremely. He was ready to forgive, right? That's all that could possibly ever mean.
She sighed out contented, "Speak about you? All he ever does is that. He keeps speaking about you so much – so much that I'm sure I'd know more about you than you would ever."
"I like the confidence and that's good news to hear, I guess?"
"Best ever."
I took a step back and smiled at how the two were getting on well with each other. Turning my back at them and their conversation, I walked out of the room into the lawn where Vincent sat as he looked forward at nothing in particular.
"Hey," I greeted as I sat down next to Luke's dad.
"Hey."
Silence. There was absolute silence after this. What more could I expect?
"I never intended to shatter Luke so much," he said as he broke the silence, making me heave of a sigh.
"But you did, Vincent? And it shattered the five year old Luke completely," the swing we sat on produced a creaking sound and gently moved with a strong gush of wind.
"I fell out of love. I still love Trish but I wasn't in love with her. I couldn't find the spark anymore and that was when I knew I had to leave," Vincent justified.
I nodded my head in denial and raised my voice, "She still loves you, absolutely. She didn't try getting married — dating? Maybe one or two here and there but she never could wash away the memories you left her with."
"Trish was always the passionate one," Vincent smiled.
"Claudia —"
"I love her," Vincent cut me off, "She means the world to me now. The way she walks and the way she looks are all that needs to get my heart beating frantically.
"That's nice," I remarked as I gently hit my leg on the sand below whilst swinging slightly, "Because Claudia seems like an amazing woman who really needs to be treasured. So treasure her?"
He nodded.
I heard slight walking sounds from my back and soon realised he was standing there. Smiling, I swung a bit more.
"Luke —"
"How is he doing?" Vincent asked cutting me off in a caring and hurried tone. The curiosity was kicking him right at his gut.
I couldn't help but smirk, "Why not you ask him yourself?"