I WAS SCROLLING THROUGH ALICE'S (toms sister) TWITTER AND I FOUND THIS
EEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKK LOOK AT HOW CUTE HE IS OH MY GOOOOOOD :DDDD
Help me I'm dying
~~~
As soon as I woke in the morning, I went straight to work. After giving Jordan a small good morning peck on the cheek (while he was still completely out of it in a coma), I wrote out a note describing where I was going and when I'd be back, and then I grabbed Jordan's keys and wallet to set off on my journey.
I stopped at the grocery store first. Since I'd gotten there so early, there was hardly anyone inside except a few old ladies who were going 2 miles an hour with their rickety buggy carts. I didn't want to get much, I felt horrible already for stealing Jordan's wallet without telling him, so I only grabbed what was completely necessary for the fridge and our London trip, then headed out of the store quickly.
But I did buy a few things that weren't exactly necessary...
I stopped by the pharmacy next, to pick up the meds for my sore butt and grab a few bottles of NyQuil in case I had some trouble sleeping while in London. I would never admit it to Jordan, or anyone for that matter, but I even picked up a bottle of Viagra and a package of condoms. I wanted to be safe, just in case anything happened and I wasn't prepared for it. When I left, I made sure to stuff the more embarrassing purchases from the pharmacy and the store deep down in my pockets. I would conceal them in my suitcase later, when Jordan wasn't around.
And then, like I promised, I stopped by Sonja and Tucker's.
Sonja was coincidentally in the middle of cooking breakfast when I walked in. We sat around and talked for an hour or two, catching up on current events and things that had happened in the last month that I'd been gone. Sonja finally got a subscriber plaque from YouTube, Tucker learned how to make spaghetti, and of course I had to tell them the whole fiasco with Nade.
"You're lucky you've got Jordan," Tucker replied through a layer of waffle in his mouth. "Otherwise you'd be a lump in our living room floor. Nade tears you up worse than anyone."
My mouth opened to protest against the accusation, but I knew he was right. Nade was my true, true first love. I could quote every word he's ever said to me and not stutter or falter once. I remember everything he says to me and I take it to heart. I probably would be facedown in carpet right now if it weren't for Jordan.
"He's a jerk," Sonja said dully. "You should've never started talking to the asshole again. He just makes you miserable. Where is Jordan by the way? He's always attached to your hip wherever you go."
I rolled my eyes. "Shut up. I've got to keep him around, or else he goes into depression." I glanced down at the black screen of my phone, disappointed when I saw no texts or calls from the man in question. Has he woken up yet? If so, why hasn't he sent me a damn text? It's been hours since I left, he should be up by now...
Tucker snickered quietly. "Really? You've been checkin that phone every five seconds, I think it's you who depends on him. Hasn't texted you since you left?"
"No..." I replied glumly. "Not a single damn text. I left hours ago! He should be up by now, shouldn't he?"
Tucker only shrugged, taking another hunk out of his waffles. "Maybe he's busy with important shit man, he is a huge Youtuber with a pretty big career."
I pouted. I'm important too, aren't I? I thought I was his first priority, he always spends his time with me only. "Well maybe I'm important shit too. Really, I think I should call him or something." I made a grab for my phone, but Sonja put her hand over mine.
"If he wants to call or text you, let him. Talk to us right now, we haven't seen you in forever. And eat your waffles! I spent an hour making those stupid things." She jabbed my fork on a waffle and force fed it down my throat, making me gag and choke while Tucker laughed his ass off across from me. I've missed them. When I finished choking down my waffle, I shoved my phone back in my pocket and continued my conversation with Sonja and Tucker.
Little did I know that miles away Jordan was in mortal danger, and at the exact same time I turned my phone off, he began calling mine.
A whole two hours passed before I checked my phone again and when I did, my heart fell into my bowels.
6 Missed Calls From JORDY <3
10 Missed Calls and 6 Voicemails From MATTY
3 Missed Missed Calls from TONY
I listened to the voicemails first, body trembling as the automatic voice explained how to review them. I shakily pressed the button and listened with dread pooling hazardously inside my stomach.
"Now reviewing voicemail one from MATTY," the automatic voice read. Nades voice didn't come through though, it was Josh's panicked one instead, which was so so so much worse.
"Tom? Tom, please pick up the phone. Nade just got Jordan's address and he's coming over there, are you up there with him? Call me as soon as you can, okay?"
It finished and the next one began.
"Why aren't you answering your phone? Lock the doors to Jordan's apartment, Nades on a rampage and I don't want anyone getting hurt when he goes up there."
With my stomach twisting painfully, the third voicemail played.
"Tom! Where the hell are you? Answer your phone! Nades gonna kill Jordan if you don't get off your ass and-" he was cut off midway with a bleep, and with a startling realization I found that Josh was calling me again. With trembling fingers, I managed to hit the answer button with my thumb.
"H-Hello?"
"WHERE ARE YOU?!" Josh screamed, deafing me temporarily as I pulled the phone back a little.
"I-I'm at Sonja and Tucker's, what's happened?"
I could hear screaming, shouting, huge thwacks coming from the background of the call, and my skin felt ice cold. "NADES KILLING HIM!" Josh shrieked, "HES KILLING HIM!"
"Where?!"
"JORDAN'S APARTMENT B-"
The signal was lost, and my skin was blotched with big red welts of anger. I snatched my keys off the table and sprinted to the car, ignoring Sonja and Tucker's questions as to what was going on. The speedometer never left 90 the whole way to Jordan's apartment and my anger and fear never left even when I was marching up the stairs to his floor. When I reached the door I pounded my fists against it until finally, after five minutes, someone answered it. Josh's face was busted to all hell. His nose was slightly crooked, his cheek had a large bruise, and his top lip looked swelled enough to burst open. He yanked me inside, where I could finally hear the full mass of the noise from the background of the call.
But amidst the screaming and thwacking sounds, I could hear sobs, heartbreaking sobs that I recognized instantly.
Nade was locked inside the bathroom, and I found that his screams were the ones I could hear in the call. The thwacking sounds were coming from the force of the metal baseball bat he was using against the bathroom door, while poor Tony was barely managing to keep him contained. Tony looked so much worse than Josh, but I didn't have time to look at all of his injuries. I ran to the bedroom where the sobs were coming from and flung open the door.
Jordan was curled up on the bed with the sheets drawn over his head. I kneeled beside the bed and tried to tug them off, but he cried harder and kept himself covered.
"Sparklez, Jordy, it-it's Tom. Come out, okay? I'm here now." I tried it again. He let the covers slip down, to reveal his bare hunched over backside, covered in claw marks.
Whatever was left of my sanity...left.
The bathroom door was open in seconds, and Nade was on the floor in a single moment. He stopped his stupid screaming when I had him pinned and then he just laid there, staring at me innocently, like he hadn't done a single thing wrong. I was gritting my teeth so hard they felt like they were going to break.
"Why?" I asked in a demonic tone.
His lip quivered in a pitiful way, but I took no notice of it. "I-...Tommy, I-"
"Shut UP!" I bellowed, shaking him violently. "YOU DON'T CALL ME THAT FUCKING NAME ANYMORE! I'm sick of you! I should kill you for touching him, I should skin your ass alive and feed you to a bunch of hungry fucking sharks! GET OUT! BE THANKFUL I DIDN'T SLIT YOUR THROAT AND RIP YOU APART FOR HURTING MY BOYFRIEND!"
I let him go. He scrambled out from under me, sobbing pathetically as he ran out of the apartment. The anger drained out of me quickly. The fact that I had restrained myself from beating the shit out of him was a miracle, he could've been killed for what he did. I brushed past a shocked Tony and Josh to run back to my poor Jordan, whose sobs had ceased to whimpers and sniffles while he laid curled up in bed.
He wouldn't speak. As I examined the injuries he'd gotten (which were minor, considering how bad the Modesteps were), he never said a word. When I finished putting disinfectant on his scratch marks, however, he grabbed me around the waist and refused to let go. I coaxed him to sleep within minutes with soft reassurances, and managed to make my escape from his grasp in nearly two.
The Modesteps were still waiting outside the room when I walked into the hallway. Tony looked the worst of all of them, a bloody nose, a black eye, huge already purple bruises on the sides of his arms and cheeks. They were in shape of a bat, and I guessed that Tony had stepped in front of the blows to keep Jordan safe. I felt like hugging them both for keeping him safe.
"He was out the door before I even realized where he was going with that stupid bat..." Josh muttered, rubbing his crooked nose. "Tony got here before I did. Thank him for keeping Nade off Jordan most of the time." He nodded towards Tony, who was eyeing the smashed up bathroom door with weary eyes.
"Lil' fucker got me in the throat," Tony groaned, holding the said area. "Sorry I couldn't stop him from clawing the kid up so badly, T. Is he alright?"
I nodded solemnly. I wasn't sure what to feel, say, or do at this point. So many emotions were running through me all at once and I was too tired to feel them. "He's asleep. Thanks for...everything. Without you guys, he'd probably be a lot worse." He'd be dead. That bat could've killed him, it nearly killed Tony.
"Mind if we stay awhile?" Josh asked. "I don't really want to go home and listen to that bitch cry all afternoon."
I shrugged. "Go ahead. But I'd go to the ER first. You both look like hell."
"So do you," Tony joked. "Think this has killed you more than any of us. You're white as a table cloth. Go sleep with the kid in there, we'll keep watch in case Nade comes back."
I raised my eyebrows at him. "You don't have to."
"We want to," Josh chimed in. "Get some rest Tom."
~
"You know I love you, right?"
Jordan nodded slowly, wiping away a few stray tears with his sweater sleeve. I'd taken every possible measure to make him feel better. I dug out his favorite sweater, made a fruit salad with his favorite fruits, pulled up Breaking Bad on the TV, offered him the biggest fluffiness blankets I could find, played with his hair, massaged his shoulders, kissed him a little around the bruised areas of his skin, cuddled him non stop, I practically suffocated him with affection and he still hasn't said a single word since Nade put his hands on him. I wanted so badly to drive to Nades house, kidnap him, and throw him onto an open freeway. The idea of him getting ran over with huge cars made me feel slightly more calm.
"And that you look gorgeous, hot, beautiful, and very very cute?"
His lip tilted up for a milisecond, before turning downwards again. Whining, I showered his neck with kisses again in a desperate attempt to get him to smile.
"Please smile, I've never missed your smile so much before..."
His face remained placid. Some fresh tears welled up, but he hastily moped them up before they could spill over. I passed him the box of tissues with pandas on them, ones that Josh purchased on his way home from the ER with Tony. He'd been kind enough to buy some other things too. Nehi peach soda, a big roll of cookie dough, some discount rom com movies, and a stuffed penguin. That was Tony's idea, of course. He delivered the penguin himself to Jordan, and Jordan had smiled for a full three seconds when it was given to him. It was a happy moment.
He was still clutching that penguin now as I held him.
"Ever decide on a name for that little guy?" I asked quietly, motioning at the penguin he was cradling to his chest. He looked down at it thoughtfully. Then he shrugged, and I sighed disappointedly.
"At least name him something with Tony in it, he's a walking penguin after all. How about Anthony?"
He cocked his head for a second, in deep thought about it as he stared down at his penguin. I watched in amazement as his cracked lips parted to whisper out Tj.
"Tj? Tony Junior?"
He shook his head, and pointed at me then at himself. Oh. Tom and Jordan: Tj. That's cute.
"I like it, but Tony might be disappointed." I grinned. He grinned for a moment too, but then it disappeared, and awkward silence replaced it instead.
"Would you care if I stepped out a minute?" I asked him. "Just to see what Tony and Josh are up to?"
With a slow shrug, he turned over on the bed and put his back to me. I sighed.
"I'll be right back, okay?" I scooted out cautiously and quickly, making my way to the living room in a flash. The two brothers were lounging on the couch together with ice packs and heating pads compressing various parts of their bodies. They greeted me with nods of acknowledgment when I walked in.
"Tell me what happened. Please." I wanted to know the full story, and so far I'd only gathered that Nade had went on a rampage and made his target Jordan, for whatever reason.
Josh patted the seat next to him and I gladly melted into it. Tony began the story with a grimace on his face.
"We were chilling in the living room, y'know? And he just starts going nuts, says he texted Jordan and um...well, do you want the exact words used that he said?"
"Yes," I nearly growled. "I want to hear every word."
"Alright then," he shrugged. "He texted Jordan askin' where you were, and of course Jordan didn't tell him. Nade asked why he wouldn't tell him, Jordan said 'because he loves me now' or something along those lines. Guy flipped shit, I mean he actually flipped the damn coffee table and almost broke the telly. Then he texted him again, said prove it. Um...I think you've still got his phone, mate." He beckoned Josh to hand him the phone strewn across the coffee table, and Josh reluctantly passed it to him. Tony pulled up the messages for me to see and I took the phone hastily from him to read the messages.
N: wheres Tom?
J: It's not any of my business to tell you.
N: why the hell wont you tell me?
J: For obvious reasons. Tom loves me now, in case you haven't noticed, and he doesn't want or need to talk to you anymore.
N: oh yeah? fucking prove it you piece of shit.
Jordan sent an image
The image was me. I was shirtless and asleep, my arms locked around Jordan's bare waist and my nose and lips pressed against his neck. I bit down hard on my tongue when I saw the stream of messages sent by Nade soon after the picture was seen by him.
N: im coming to your apartment to beat the shit out of you, you miserable waste of space
N: i shouldve done it ages ago when i first found out tom was even near you
N: he doesnt love you, you fat ugly disgusting virgin. he loves me and when im murdering you, lets see how long it takes him to save you. it might just tell you a hint on how much he cares about your fat ass.
I pulled out my phone and checked, and my horrible guess was confirmed. Jordan called me the moment Nade started threatening him. I wasn't there to save him. It's why he's being cold towards me, he thinks I purposely took a long time to get here so he would get hurt. He needed me and I wasn't there for him. That's what ripped me to shreds. He called me hoping, counting on me to protect him from someone who was trying to kill him, and I wasn't there.
"What happened?" I asked, dreading the answer. "After he left?"
Josh took the lead on this one. "I tried calling you first, but when you didn't answer the first few times I told Tony he'd better go after Nade. He tailed him all the way to main street, but he lost him in traffic. When he did get there Jordan was locked in the bedroom and Nade was beating the door in with that bat. Tell him what happened after." He nudged Tony in the leg.
Tony's eyes began to water. "Mate...it was awful. It was like watching a wolf chase down a kitty. Jordan came out because I'd gotten Nade to calm down, and...when he came out, Nade went nuts again. Got him once or twice in the stomach with the bat, but when I got the thing away from him, he used his nails...well, you've seen what he did. Josh came and we yanked him off and threw him in the bathroom, along with that stupid bat, and then you came. You looked bloody terrifying when you told him off, I'll tell ya that. Never seen you so angry before, not since that game of drunk Janga awhile ago. I miss Janga night."
"So do I," I replied distractedly. "You know what? I'm suing Nade for everything he's got."
"Suing him won't help anything," Josh replied. "He doesn't have anything, Tom."
"What do you mean? He's got that damn clothing store, he's bound to have-"
"He's barely paying rent," Tony laughed. "He won't go to work. Too upset over you and too horny to function without us-"
Josh slapped his hand over Tony's mouth, but the words had already been said. The room went quiet as they both stared at me for a response, but I had already reacted to their back stabbery long ago. I just sent them both a warning glare and prepared a quick speech in my head.
"I already know, don't bother. Nice to know you both dedicate your incest threesome to your hatred for me."
Josh paled white, Tony became a little irritated. "T, it's not incest-"
"Fucking your brother, plus a friend, is incest."
"You didn't seem to have a problem with it when you were sleeping with us," Josh growled. "So whys it so different with Nade?"
It wasn't just sleeping around, I wanted to say. But I muttered out a feeble response instead. "I wasn't sleeping with both of you at the same time."
Josh's face was the color of sun burn. "Might as well have been, with how quick you hooked up with me after Tony didn't want you anymore. Tell me, were you fucking him too while you were fucking me?"
"Stop it!"
All three of our heads snapped up to Jordan, who was standing in the middle of the hallway, clutching his penguin as tears dripped down his flushed cheeks. "It doesn't matter who slept with who," he said in a wavering tone. "I-I just want us to be friends. Can't we be f-friends?"
Of all the horrible, heartbreaking, soul crushing images in life, a crying Jordan holding his little penguin, the very picture of robbed innocence, was the number one most destroying for me.
I looked to them and they looked to me. We had to. Jordan had been through enough and none of us were up to putting him through anymore drama. Slowly, Josh held out his hand for me to shake. I did so without a moments hesitation, and he sighed. "Clean slate. No more past drama. Tony?" He glanced back at his brother, but he wasn't there. I gasped when I felt a pair of lips attack my own, and shoved the man who decided it'd be a grand idea to kiss me. Tony grinned.
"It was a celebratory kiss mate," he defended, still sporting a shit eating grin.
I laughed for the first time all night. "Alright, but Jordan has permission to kick your ass for it."
"Oh yeah! Forgot he was your boyfriend now."
"Boyfriend?" Jordan and I asked at the exact same time. Tony nodded.
"You called him your boyfriend T, when you were yelling at Nade remember? The whole slit your throat bit for hurting your boyfriend?"
I did call Jordan my boyfriend. I can't believe I called him my boyfriend. My eyes shot up to read his expression, which was a slightly flattered looking one. "You called me your boyfriend?" He asked unbelievably. The tears still lingering on his cheeks bugged me. I walked over to him, held his face in my hands, and wiped away the tiny trails with my thumbs.
"It...may have slipped out."
"Am I your boyfriend?"
"Um...are you?"
"I'd like to be."
"Well so would I."
"Then kiss and fuck!" Tony exclaimed, exasperated. "Your friends with benefits relationship is honestly a pain in the ass, and I just now found out about it!"
"Alright! Jordan, would you-"
"Don't ask me right now!" He cried.
"Why not?!"
"I look awful, Tom! Ask me when I'm not sporting an ugly sweater and a messy, slobbery face..."
"You're not ugly," Josh said softly. "You're adorable. Let him ask you, it'll make this night a lot better for you."
Jordan blushed pink. I smiled at him. "How bout it pink cheeks?"
"You're asking me alone. Not that I have anything against you guys, but-"
"It's cool, we understand," Josh reassured him. "Tony, lets go man."
They left their heating pads and ice packs behind when they hurried out of the apartment, leaving Jordan and I alone in the middle of the living room. He had his arms tucked in themselves, his eyes focused more on my shoes than anything else.
"We don't have to," I told him. "We can wait."
"No, it needs to happen soon..."
"But it doesn't have to now."
"If we don't establish something soon, more people will be going after us. I don't want another one of your ex boyfriends trying to kill me."
I lowered my eyes. "Yeah. Me neither."
"I'm sorry, that was mean. I don't feel good."
"Back hurting?"
"No. Anxiety."
"Ah. Hug?" I stretched open my arms. He stared at them for a moment, as if contemplating whether or not they would scratch the crap out of him too, but he ended up running into them anyway.
"Some other time," he said in a strained voice, as if he were about to cry again. "Tonight's been too sucky. Ask me when we're having a good day."
"London?"
"London."
~~~
OKAY LET ME JUST SHOW U THESE PHOTOS LIKE OH MY GOD HE IS AN ANGEL UGJFFUHXGBJHDFH