Cloud's POV
Rey, Me, Finn and Chewie went back to the Ileenium system. As the ship landed, they put the injured Finn on a med capsule. Aunt Leia was waiting outside the ship, her eyes expecting someone to come down the millenium falcon.
As I got off the ship, her eyes boring on me. "Cloud..."
I crashed into her arms and sobbed. "I'm so sorry...I couldn't bring him home..."
"Oh honey..." She said, her fingertips patting my head.
I pulled out of the hug. "Are you all safe? Is Anais safe?"
She wiped my tears and nodded. "Yes she is... you know, she reminds me of her grandfather more than me."
My mouth formed a small smile. "Yes she is alot like uncle Han."
"And he's gone." Aunt Leia muttered.
"I'm sorry..."
"It's not your fault, Cloud. It's Kylo Ren's." Her voice emphasizing that foreign name.
"I want to...just get out of this mess for a while. But I promise I'll come back once Dad returns and because, he would be coming for me." I said.
"Where would you go? Will you take Anais with you?" She asked.
"Castell system, Poe built me a house there. Anais and I can take some time alone." I replied.
"What if Ben comes back?"
"Please, don't tell him where I am." I pleaded. "He's the reason why we are going away"
She nodded as a reply and hugged her. "Thank you for everything."
"Mommy?" I turned around and saw Anais.
"Ani!" I quickly locked her in my arms and peppering her face with kisses.
"I saw you with him... are you alright?" She smiled and cupped my face.
"I am alright....how about you?" I said.
"Yep. I am fine. Uncle Poe took care of me and Grandma too!" She beamed at me.
"I'm glad they did sweetheart."
I packed our stuffs in my ship, trying to hold back tears.
I was guilty. I know I hid it well. I should've saved Han. I should've saved him.
But I can't. I was expecting Ben would be different. But no.
"Do you need me to fly it for you?" Poe muttered.
I shook my head. "It's fine. We're fine."
"When you were gone, Anais was very worried. She tried her hardest to locate you. She still don't know he's the father?" He leans on the doorway of the ship.
"She doesn't have to know. He doesn't deserve to be her father." I finished packing up and faced Poe "thank you for looking after my daughter."
"She's my godchild. Of course I'll do anything for her. And you are my godwife, and I am your god husband." He smirked.
"Oh dear..." I smiled and face palmed.
"I got you didn't I did I? Huh?" He chuckled removing my hand on my face. "Did I just made you laugh?"
"Yes, Poe. Yes you did." I chuckled and hugged him. "I'm going to miss you and everyone here. I promise I'll be back once dad gets back."
"I'll miss you too and Ani." He pulled away and smiled.
"Uncle Poe!" He turned around to see Anais running to him.
"Hey there sweetheart!" He enveloped her in his arms. "I'll miss you so so so much!"
"I'll miss you too! So so so so so much!!!" She pulled away from the hug.
"I'll visit you guys there, every last day of the season." Poe said, removing the hair strands on Anais' face.
"Come on, peanut. Let's go" I said and bid Poe goodbye as Ani ran to her seat and buckled up and flew to Castell.
"Why is it so dusty?" Ani complained as she puts her stuffs in the room.
The room where Ben and I used to cuddle.
I felt so nostalgic returning to that old house. It's where we made love for the first time and where he hurt me for the first time. But I am going to start anew. With my daughter right here.
"Let's just clean up okay? Next week, mommy will go to tattooine to buy some paint so we can redesign the house according to your favorite color okay?" I said while I dusted the chairs and cupboards.
"Okay..." She said and scrunched up her nose.
Is been months, since Anais and I stayed there. Every end of the month, Poe would visit us and bring some good foods, just like he promised. Anais would play with him while I would go and go harvest some fruits and vegetables.
I feared that one day, Anais would ask about Ben. i could not just tell her that her father was a mass murdering freako who killed his own father and fanboys on his grandfather.
But that day, while were waiting for Poe to visit us since its the end of the month, it happened.
"Mommy... Do I have a daddy?" Ani asked. "it's because Grandma told me a story about her father. and she told me he was a good person."
I fear that she would ask it soon. I fear that she would be asking. I fear it because I dont know what to say.
"You ask so much questions today. Let's clean up so we can finish harvesting okay?" I replied.
"Okay..." Was all she replied. A disappointed and sad okay.
I was guilty. of course I am. I feel sorry for Anais. She must've felt bad.
"Oh baby..." I cupped her face and knelt. "Your father is a great man. Hes very brave, gentle, strong and very kind. Like a bear. He's sometimes afraid but that's okay, because it makes him human even more. He is willing to risk everything. And mommy loves him so much."
I don't know if it's a lie. Or a fact. But i do know this. That man that I described in fromt of my daughter, was Ben Solo. Not Kylo Ren.
Because I love Ben Solo. But Ben is dead now.
"Do you, really?"
I turned around to see a familiar face.