The steady jostle of a trotting horse gradually pulls me back into consciousness. Through my eyelids I can see sunlight above me, bright and irritating to my tired eyes.
Although curiosity is burning within me to discover where we have ended up, I can't bring myself to sit up or look around. Crippling fear pressing in around me has me locked in an unbreakable hold. I'm paralyzed.
Slowly, I become aware of a gentle sniffling sound. Like someone's crying. It takes me a moment to realize that it must be the mare who lost her foal just hours before, now forced to carry me God knows where.
Oh, God, I think, my throat constricting painfully. I killed those people. I killed an innocent baby.
More blood on my hands. More blood that I can't handle. More blood that will destroy me from the inside out with guilt.
It's because of the mournful horse that I finally have the courage to open my eyes.
Not much has changed in the scenery from the previous night aside from the massive sandstone castle that can be seen in the distance over rolling hills of sparse grass which is quickly giving way to sandy dunes. The middle kingdom? I wonder. Why are they taking me there?
They aren't bringing me to Anabella, then. Alec told me that she's holed up in the ruins of the northern kingdom, unable to leave because of awaiting armies fighting against her rule, so it's impossible that she would be here.
My knowledge of the middle kingdom is sparse, but I do know that its many villages are found to the north and the east of the castle. Could the fatoris be taking me to one of the villages, or to the castle itself? Perhaps they plan to take me right through the kingdom to avoid the much longer process of going around, but that would be very risky. If anyone caught a single glimpse of my captors or of me, absolute chaos would ensue.
Either way, I'm terrified.
I struggle to reposition myself correctly on the saddle. I'd been haphazardly strewn across the horse while unconscious and my back is aching unbearably, but my pain is nothing compared to that of the animal underneath me. The poor horse barely manages to keep upright, hooves dragging on the ground and neck slumping downward.
I risk a glance to either side, at the vile demons who walk alongside me. Neither of them have looked my way since I woke, but now Scary's eyes are boring into me. I look down quickly, tears brimming in my eyes, and stare intensely at the horn of the saddle until I feel the monster's cold gaze move on from me. When it does, I take a shaky breath full of nerves and terror. I lean forward, just enough to be allow the mare to hear me without interference from them.
"I'm so sorry for what they've done to you," I whisper. I press my palm against her neck. "I'm sorry I couldn't stop them."
The horse tenses, her powerful shoulder muscles rippling underneath me. Her ears flatten against her head. She suddenly rears up and releases a chilling neigh into the sky. I grab desperately for the reins, but the mare tosses me easily onto the sandy ground. It does little to cushion my fall.
The horse turns to me, tail flicking in agitation. I've never seen the eyes of a mother who has lost her child, but I would equate it to those of the animal in front of me. The pain in them is so real, so human.
"Fat lot your apologies do now. Your companion slaughtered my baby like a pig, and you didn't do a thing!"
My throat closes. "I—I—" I what? I tried? I couldn't even move. I was so afraid. I did not try. A mother with a dead baby doesn't want to hear that I tried.
"Stupid beast!" one of the fatoris roars. I don't know or care which one. It raises its weapon against the mare, a horrific snarl on its dark face. My heartbeat echoes loudly in my ears and my legs are shaking, but I'm not going to sit by and do nothing again. I push myself to my feet and into the midst of it before the monster can harm her.
"If you take another life, I won't go another step, regardless of your threats!" I yell. I don't expect to be listened to. In fact, I expect to be struck again. Instead, Scary steps forward and shoves the other demon to the side, looking straight down at me.
"Touch neither the girl nor the beast. We've nearly reached our destination," it says, and turns to the middle kingdom and resumes gliding towards it.
I clear my throat, a painful lump lodged in my chest making it difficult to breathe. "Release her. I am quite able enough to walk myself."
Scary turns back to me, but I draw myself up and hope that I'm not shaking noticeably. The monster's eyes flick from me to the horse once.
"Very well," it says, and nods. I don't turn to say goodbye to the mare, or even to watch as she leaves, but I hear her hooves pounding into the ground and disappearing into the distance as soon as the words of her freedom reach her ears. And once again, I'm left alone with monsters.
*****
Alec.
Simply thinking his name causes me greater pain than I could ever imagine—greater even than my probable impending death.
I wish he was here with me. No—not here. Not anywhere near these barbaric murderers. But with me, where only his presence and the color of his eyes would be enough to soothe my fears. I need that more than anything, to see him again. Even if it's the last time.
As glad as I was that the mare had been allowed to go free, trudging through the constantly shifting sand in my flimsy slippers was becoming more difficult than I had thought it would be. The shoes kept falling off my feet. I stopped once to slip them back on, but the crueler fatoris happily took any opportunity to hit me, so the next time my shoes slipped off, I left them in the sand. Something unexpected happened when my skin touched the blazing sand—it hurt.
I couldn't remember ever experiencing being burnt. For the first time, fire was hurting me.
And that too also caused me great pain.
*****
I can only bear the scorching sand for so long, and as the day wanes on, the ground becomes hotter and hotter. I catch a glimpse of the bottom of my feet and wince. Ugly red blisters cover my skin, shooting horrible pain through my legs whenever I take a step. I'm terrified to stop, but soon the pain causes me to limp heavily. I quickly become unable to keep up with my captors, and of course, they take notice.
Scary turns and glides toward me. I step away from it, the pain of my feet bringing tears to my eyes. I decide that since I'm already going to be beaten for stopping, I might as well relieve the pain in my feet, even for just a second. I collapse into the sand and shield my face with my hands from the blow that I know is coming.
As expected, the monster jabs its sword at me, demon eyes blazing. "On your feet or I will end this right here!" it threatens. I feel the cold curved blade press against my neck.
"Why do you not just kill me now?" I ask tearfully, uncovering my eyes just enough to see the monster above me. "What is the purpose of prolonging the inevitable?"
Instead of answering me or burying its weapon deep in my neck as I expect, the fatoris does neither. Its wicked eyes simply narrow at me. It doesn't know how to answer.
"On your feet," it repeats, low and menacing. I swallow the lump in my throat formed by tears and stand. I bite back a cry when I feel the burning grains of sand pressing against my torn skin, but the wetness that pours down my cheeks is uncontrollable. The fatoris sneers at me and returns its sword to its side.
"A legend reduced to a sniveling little girl," it, and both monsters laugh. I feel my face redden, but I say nothing and only stare at them. "So much for her astounding bravery."
The other steps forward to join in on the fun. "She must be distressed that her lover hasn't come for her."
Now my face is truly burning. "He isn't my lover," I mumble. Fresh tears threaten to spill over. Stop talking about him.
"Whatever the case, he's not coming for you. Loyalty only goes so far." The two of them watch me carefully for my reaction. Instead of letting more tears form, I raise my chin in defiance and look them in the black pits of their eyes.
"He'll come." There is no tremor of doubt in my voice, no hesitation or uncertainty.
Scary cocks its head to the side. How is it possible that it could make such a human gesture seem so evil? "How can you be so sure?" It smiles. Not a nice smile, but one that seeks to hurt me.
"Because I know him," I say, and I smile too.
*****
When night falls, I am not allowed to stop and rest. I prepare for another night of stumbling through exhaustion, my eyes barely open. At least the pain in my feet has lessened now that the sand has cooled.
The fatoris seem to never become fatigued. I don't think that they have to sleep. Perhaps they run off the energy of their many, many wrongdoings.
With less pain in my feet comes the realization of how hungry I am. When exactly was the last time I ate? I can't even remember. With Max and Alec, I think. Nearly two days ago. My stomach feels like it's trying to consume itself. But worse even than that is the feel of my tongue and my throat. Sandpaper is the only way to describe it, and the dry, hot air only makes it worse. Every breath hurts.
There is one aspect of this journey that I don't mind: the star-filled sky. Away from the bright fires of town and the cover of trees, the sky looks absolutely breathtaking. Even more beautiful than the nights I spent with Peter watching it in the forest. But maybe that's only because those memories are now soiled. Even so, I hope that he's seen these stars, and that he enjoyed them as much as I do.
Don't think about him.
I turn my attention back to the sky.
As the sun sinks below the horizon, a nearly invisible dark blue color appears at the edge of the typical sunset colors of orange and pink, between them and the normal black of night skies. A subtle smile grazes my lips. This color of blue used to be my favorite, up until recently. Now I find that I prefer green. Green is the color of nature, of life. Alec's eyes.
It occurs to me that I don't know what his favorite color is. I don't know what his favorite food is either, although I'd have to guess that it's some type of fruit. Cantaloupe maybe, or strawberries. I love strawberries.
When he finds me, I'll be sure to ask him. I want to know him more. What his parents were like, when his birthday is, if he has any brothers or sisters. I know him—he's brave, usually grumpy but he can be kind too, and loyal—but I don't know him. I don't know why he's so guarded, so angry. I know that something must have happened. I just don't know what.
Perhaps someday I'll ask him that too.
A/N: If you enjoy this chapter, please leave a vote or a comment! I really appreciate it! <3
I. Finally. Finished. This. Chapter. I got hit with such a bad wave of writer's block, (not to mention massive loads of school work too) and it's been so hard to get writing done. But I finally did it!! Wooooooo!!! And I also have a new respect for writers who update more than once a week or even once a week. That's insane, especially if you have other things going on. Like sports and school in my case!!! But that's ok, I finally finished. So I hope you guys love this chapter. I lost my mind writing it. :-)