After Halloween passed, which by the way was totally fun, I decided I had to either go home or find somewhere else to crash. I knew Debbie was trying to stay calm but best friends aren't meant to be with each other 24/7, it's just too much. Besides she was annoying me too, with her small remarks about mates or Zack, not to mention I sorely missed having my own bed. Debbie's bed was big enough for the two of us, but nothing is like being able to sleep alone, without being hit or kicked or losing blankets. I decided to go after work, so I had enough time to hopefully just go to bed. I chose Monday, which meant I wouldn't be done until after closing time, around eleven. Hopefully they would all be asleep by then.
I had two bags full of my clothes and things stuffed in my car, which was another sign I should go home. It was sort of ridiculous having nearly my whole room traveling with me.
I dragged the bags inside with me, being careful to stay quiet. I pulled past the kitchen and living room, checking to see if there were any people sneaking midnight snacks or whatever. No one was out, so I silently made my trip to my room. I forgot there were two small children staying in my bed when I opened my door and lugged in the bags. I huffed.
I turned to leave but then heard a small voice call out.
"Mom?" It was the daughter, whose name I forgot.
"No sorry," I whispered back. "Go back to sleep.
"Are you the pretty girl who sleeps here?" I smiled. Pretty?
"Yeah, I'm Rita," I paused at the door. "Now go back to sleep."
"My name is Felicity," she said. I sighed.
"Well Felicity, you should go back to sleep it's really late-"
"I wasn't sleeping," she assured me. I chuckled. "Asher is!"
"Then you should be quiet and go back to sleep," I tried to not be annoyed. For having a quiet mother, the girl was a talker. She was silent for a moment and I thought that meant she would listen to me, but then she spoke again.
"You can sleep with us if you want," she finally said, warily. "Mom used to all the time, but not any more."
This kid was good at using the guilt card. Her voice lowered just enough to still sound sweet and needy. Guess she learned something from her mother. I didn't want to sleep with kids, though.
"It's ok, Asher likes to cuddle," she giggled. Against my better judgement I went up to my bed and saw her scoot over for me, pushing her little brother against the wall. "Chris told me you said it's ok to sleep in your bed."
My breathing hitched.
"Are gonna sleep here?" I nodded and laid next to her. I could see her more clearly and saw a miniature April. She had straight brown hair and huge brown eyes that made her the ultimate little angel, who could probably make herself cry in an instant, like her mother. She cuddled up next me, resting her head on my shoulder. Funnily enough, we both knocked out.
The next morning I found myself somehow between Felicity and her brother, with each curling up to me and holding an arm in a stronghold. I didn't know how to get up without waking them. I heard the door crack open and sounds of voices down the hall; everyone else must have been awake and having breakfast.
"Felicity? Asher?" Chris turned on the light. I squeezed my eyes shut at the instant exposure to brightness and heard him chuckled. Both children moved a little, Asher cuddling closer to me and Felicity pushed down the blankets. "Good morning."
"Morning," I replied with a yawn.
"You stayed!" Felicity said excitedly. Who knew bonding happened best while asleep. "I knew you would."
"It's hard to say no," I mumbled.
"Come on guys, breakfast is ready," Chris said, sounding happy. I ignored the speeding up of my heart and yawned again. Asher's eyes opened wide and he looked shocked to be holding onto me.
"Good morning," I smiled at him. He smiled back. I realized while Felicity was dead on for her April, Asher actually looked less like them. He had lighter hair and his ears popped out, making him sort of goofy looking. He had deep brown eyes, but they were smaller and less doe-like.
"Who are you?" He asked. I smiled.
"I'm Rita," I replied. Chris left the room and both kids sat up. "If you guys don't mind I have to get dressed.
"You're still wearing your clothes?!" Asher looked shocked. Both were wearing footsie pajamas. "You should change."
For having lost their father, both children seemed relatively happy. They easily welcomed strangers and liked Chris as far as I could tell. I left them to get ready, taking some new clothes to bathroom to change quickly.
When I was dressed and clean for the day I slowly went outside, hoping everyone would be dispersed. Sadly, my hope was lost as they were all seated at the dining table, waiting for me t join them.
"About time," Tony said snarkily. He was a grumpy frump when he was hungry. Come to think of it, he was a grumpy frump all the time. I scowled at him and took my seat between Felicity and Hannah, where a breakfast buffet sat between me and angelic April. Honestly I repeat myself because you hardly ever meet a woman who is so beautiful and tragic that it's the only thought that comes to mind when you see her.
"Sorry," I muttered to the rest of the table. I looked at my father, who gave me a lopsided smile, then my mother at the other end, who gave me a tired smile.
"It's good to have the family together again, Rita," my dad said, scooping some eggs onto his plate, thereby allowing the rest of us to begin shoveling food onto our own plates.
"Well Dad," I got up to get myself a glass of orange juice, "I'm sorry I deprived you of this wonderful time, but Debbie needed me, you know."
I could hear my mother silently chuckle from the table. I brought back the jug of juice for the kids to drink and took a big gulp of my juice.
"She needed you for a full month?" He acted nonchalant but the tension was in the air.
"Dad," I set down my cup and put out a fake serious face, causing everyone else to look haphazardly at me, "Debbie and I are soul mates! We need each other!"
This made everyone but Tony laugh, then again, Tony doesn't have a sense of humor so I shouldn't have expected him to. I smiled to myself and began eating away at my french toast and bananas. A nervous as Chris and his family made me, as angry as Tony made me, and as frustrated as my parents made me, it felt nice to be back in a somewhat normal setting. My little brothers' laugh was good to hear, since they were part of my favorite audience. I got to teach them how to be sassy and funny, since all Tony ever did was lecture and train them. Having a mentor like Tony probably sucked since he believes so harshly in rules and whatever, but they do look up to him for some reason. I think it's mostly because he found such a hot girl to mate with. Tony's not much of a looker.
I was one of the first to finish breakfast. I went out to the porch to sit for a moment, by myself. I hadn't been by myself for such a long time, it was a relief. No one was pestering me, in or out of my brain. I could feel the winds against my jacket and through my hair.
"Um," a low throaty sound came from behind me. I didn't dare look. "Do you want to go for a run? I haven't been officially introduced to the actual land yet, besides the city."
I sighed. This was not going to be good for me, but I felt like I had to. I felt compelled to agree, even going so far as trying to make myself believe that this was all in innocence and that we were both on the same page. That I would still love Zack as much as I wanted to instead of feeling rocky and disbelieving.
"Ok," I stood up, still not looking at him. "It's not far from here, we can walk."
"Great," He followed me behind the house. "Good."
We walked in silence together, Chris slightly behind me as I led the way to the forest. The time dragged on. My heart pumped wildly, feeling as if any moment it was either going to stop or jump out of my chest.
"Rita," This was the first time he said my name. I almost whimpered. God, I needed to get a grip!
"It's not far," I acted as if I reassured him.
"April's leaving," he blurted out. I stopped in my tracks, staring straight into the woods that were not far off.
"What?"
"She can't stay, Rita," He walked in front of me. "We all know that."
I looked away, at the houses to my left, "but the kids-"
"They can sense the rift between us. They think I'm staying for business." My heart jumped erratically. I almost felt a sense of pain for these poor kids, who kept getting thrown around with their mother. "Rita, I know I'm not very young any more, or even cool or whatever it is that's holding us back, but I can feel this string between us. I, fuck. I don't even know how to act around you, but my instincts keep telling me I should love you."
"Chris don't do this," my eyes watered. I closed them, trying to imagine Zack. Zack at Comix. Zack at that weird coffee place. Zack on his couch next to me. Slowly my mind fought against me, erasing him into a ghost that never was. I felt Christopher's fingers brush off a tear.
"I know this war is scary," He didn't know why I was fighting against him. "But I will keep you safe, and trust me, I will live."
I half-smiled against my will. It was sweet to hear him say that. NO it wasn't! He was leaving a family behind for me! I'm a homewrecker! I shook my head from his grasp.
"You don't get it," I muttered, wiping my nose on my sweater. I didn't care how gross it looked. I could feel his eyes on my face. I wanted to look so badly into his eyes. Did I remember what color they were?
"Fighting against what's right can only make things worse," He breathed out. The cold air made it look like smoke. "I can't stop thinking about you-"
"We don't love each other," I snapped. His mouth closed. Then he did the very last thing I expected or wanted. He grabbed my face and kissed me; it was hard at first, but then he pulled back a bit and was softer. I felt one hand move down to my lower back to pull me towards him and the other in my hair, while his lips tugged gently at mine. Then my hands were acting of their own accord and making their way into his hair and on his scruffy face. I liked that scruff. It was manly and sexy. And oh! His hair was soft and full as I imagined.
Snap out of it, Rita!
I pulled back suddenly, snapping my eyes open. Shit. His were open and staring into mine.
My whole world was lost. I'd heard and read and seen so many times when loved ones finally connect but this feeling was something words cannot describe. Like a thousand pounds was lifted on your back. His eyes were such a beautiful shade of gray that captured every moment with mine. My brain went slack with pleasure, sort of like when you finish a test and you suddenly forget all that information you crammed the night before. I could sense the strength radiating from him. No! Not like a freaking teen movie. I could sense that he had power. Sort of like nobility, he had that raw, undeterred power that seemed to be flowing out of his skin. Something I never noticed before but it was instantly attractive.
I couldn't see another day without him. There was no way I could leave this spot, not even the wind would blow me away. Not even Zack-oh crap. Zack. My life flashed again, but now the fight was almost too much. Even mentally pulling away from him gave me a headache and the sense of immense loss that could leave me depressed.
"I love you," He said out of the blue. I could feel hot tears rolling down my cheeks. My head was really beginning to hurt and I felt like I was on my period with this wild range of emotions
"Rita," His eyes widened, his face exclaimed a sudden shock and bewilderment of my expression. "Why are you crying? This is supposed to be the best day of our lives!"
"Don't" I cried harder. "I can't do this right now, I'm sorry."
"Don't cry," He tried to stroke my hair, my face, but I pushed him away, my headache intensifying. "I'll fix it! Whatever is wrong, I'll fix it for you."
"I'm sorry," I kept crying. I ran as fast as I could in my human form back to the house. I knew he stayed, dumbfounded. I slammed the porch door and pushed past my little brothers to my room to call Debbie. I couldn't even stay in my own home for ONE DAY!
"Hey Ritzy," Mickey answered, with Debbie's laugh in the background. "I thought I called Debbie today!"
"Mickey," I cried, trying to blubber out my apologies and pain in the same sentence.
"Hold up, hold up, hold up!" He became serious. "I can't understand her."
"I'm sorry," I bawled into the phone, ignoring my mother's knock at the door.
"Rita?" Debbie shouted into the phone. "Rita, come over! Right now, Ritz!"
"Ok," I whimpered.
"I'm serious, Rita," The knocking turned into a door opening. "Get your stuff and come back. I'll see you in five!"
We hung up. My mother let herself into the room.
"Oh, baby," She crooned, getting onto the floor with me and holding me in a tight hug. "Fighting it hurts, I know."
I cried into her reddish curls, not caring whether she really knew how I felt or not. She was the only thing stopping me from taking my bag and bolting out of the house for good. I would still do it, but not until I could cry most of my feelings into numbness, with her slowly rocking me like a baby. This is why I love my mother.
*Chris*
The spot between my chin and neck felt warm, from where her hand rested when I kissed her. I know I messed up when I got married, but I thought I was doing everything right. I told April to go home, that she could stay in the house and I would continue to support her, so that I wouldn't feel guilty later. Then I confessed it all to Rita. I laid out all the cards I had to show her I was sorry for making the stupid mistake of marrying my dead best friend's wife. Besides, I never loved April more than a friend. I suppose I did kiss her and express my love to her children, whom I do love as if they are my own, but none of it was anything compared to how I feel about Rita DeLuca. Rita was beautiful, because of her beautifully dyed blonde hair that would probably look even more incredible in its natural color. Her eyes are beyond words, I can only say they are a rich brown with thick lashes. Even her Italian bone structure was beautiful, with her slightly large nose-it was something to adore! I sounded sappy and lovesick, but I'd never felt as a young man until I found Rita.
I couldn't believe that I met her at all, let alone in the sticky situation we faced. She left me in the cold autumn winds, with the forest behind me and her home before me. What did I do wrong? Perhaps it was the combination of both my marriage and my age. I'm almost twenty years older than her, sixteen actually, but isn't it always said that age doesn't matter when it comes to love?
Whatever the reason, I resolved to be the man she wanted me to be. I would change anything to be with Rita, that's what my instincts told me was right. That nothing was more right than standing close to her, knowing she was in the same room, feeling the same feelings. And without her, a strange hollowness came about that made me... hungry?
A/N: Woah super long chapter, at least for me. They've all been about 3 pages, this must be a record XD. So NOOOOW what do you think about Chris? I'm still in love with Mickey, don't ask me why, I'm still figuring that out. Thanks for continuing to support me and this story! Now pleassssse comment yo! (I'm not gangster, sorry for trying.) I love hearing insights more than getting reads or votes. Thanks again, off to write some more :) By the way, added a picture of Rita and Chris on the side, made by @cupcakecutiepop, who made this awesome banner :) I think I'll have one made with Rita and Zack next.