Dad: Close the door please.
Me: *deep breath*
Dad: What are you doing.
Me: OH, WELL IMAGINE,
Dad: Please don't
Me: AS I'M PACING THE PEWS IN A CHURCH CORRIDOR
Dad: This is the third time this week
Me: AND I CAN'T HELP BUT TO HEAR
Dad: Oh goodness
Me: NO I CAN'T HELP BUT TO HEAR AN EXCHANGING OF WORDS
Dad: What are you doing.
Me: WHAT A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING, WHAT A BEAUTIFUL WEDDING,
Dad: No
Me: SAID A BRIDESMAID TO A WAITER, OH WHAT A BUT SHAME, WHAT A SHAME THE POOR GROOMS BRIDE IS A -
Dad: I JUST WANTED YOU TO CLOSE THE DOOR
Me: I CHIME IN WITH A HAVEN'T YOU PEOPLE EVER HEARD OF, CLOSING THE GODDAMN DOOR!