‘C’mon, Remy, don’t make this anymore harder for the both of us.’
I still look down pretending that I didn’t hear him though he knew me too well and put his hand out toward me. Any other time I would’ve taken it, but I want to be strong and show him I didn't need them or most of all – him.
‘Remy. Please!’ I look up at him and shake my head slowly before looking back down avoiding the both of them. Daniel loses his patients with me and bends down, close, almost practically on top of me, but I kept my guard up and didn’t move an inch.
‘Remy, if you don’t come you know Nick will make you, you can’t stay here. They don’t trust you,’ he says both a plea and order. I look at him, the same soft grey-green eyes that I remember every detail of him still the same – not that I thought anything would’ve changed.
I don’t answer; the three of us there in awkward silence. I see Jack knows nothing about Daniel for I can see that he keeps looking at him as if he were to say just leave her be, but he knew best to keep quiet, especially as Daniel started to get irritated.
‘Remy…’ Daniel mumbles and groans, he gets back up and thrusts his hand out in front once more, but once again I don’t take it because I know once he gets hold of me he won’t let go. He shakes his head in exasperation and walks over to Jack whispering something softly so that I couldn’t hear, Jack nods and comes and walks over to me, face blank.
He looks at me and kisses my forehead long and soft and it made me want to cry and hold onto him, but I felt like I couldn’t cry anymore. Before I knew it he gets up and leaves with no goodbyes or backward glances.
I felt as if someone just ripped my heart straight out without a care in the world. I looked down and felt my breath turn uneven, feel my cheeks going hot and wet only realising that I was crying silently, shoulders slumped in defeat.
Now it’s just Daniel and I; me on the floor crying and Daniel standing there just letting me cry it out, he knows too well not to bother me while crying especially when I’m angry.
I finish weeping now lying on my back again staring into the sky like the time Daniel and I was in the middle of nowhere, when I tried to run but instead I fell and just lied there for a while…
‘Remy, swe-’
‘Don’t call me that!’ I cut him off still gazing at the sky.
‘Remiah,’ he says slowly through gritted teeth, just like Nick would when he starts to get really irritated with me. ‘We must leave as soon as we can.’ He utters now looking at me from above, I ignore him and sit up now looking deep into the dark forests wanting to run away and never be known or seen by anyone.
He tells me ‘we need to go’ about five million times though I ignore him and he starts to really get irritated, he yells at me once more but still I don’t budge.
After a while Daniel calls someone on his phone and five minutes later a van pulls up near the front and out comes the really tall man; mean, tough and scary looking. He walks towards us and Daniel takes a couple of steps back, and then looks at the tall man now facing me with his black sun glasses covering the emotions and thoughts from his eyes.
Daniel tries to persuade me a few more times and I ignore him just as usual, the tall man just observing the both of us. In the end the both of them give up and Daniel gets the tall guy to pick me up, I hear him and lie down. Unfortunately it doesn’t work though; the tall man bends down and pulls my arm upward making me sit up, he then holds my hips and throws me on his shoulders as if I were just a rag doll.
‘Ow! Watch it!’ I yell at him as I just hang there on his shoulders like a sack of potatoes swaying about. ‘Put me down at this moment!’ I start to yell and yell hit and kick but neither of them takes notice. Instead of walking into the woods they walk to the front of the house. When I turn my head around to see where we were heading tall-guy over here drops me into the van and they both just stand there staring at me, waiting for my next move.
My bottom started to sting and hurt as well as my back but even so I slowly try to slip out of the van with the both of them still standing there hoping that they’ll let me go. Ha! As if! I laughed to myself.
The tall man is closer to the van and I than Daniel and as soon as I put my legs on the ground the tall guy shakes his head, I don’t take any notice and keep sliding slowly out of the van; Daniel stands there watching me, intrigued.
When I’m finally on my two feet the tall man holds my wrist slightly telling me to sit back down his voice not even changing as if he were some emotionless-robot. Daniel moves up a bit closer watching more carefully now, I pretend that the guy wasn’t holding me and try to shrug him off but as I take a step his grip tightens yet I continue. As soon as I take at least one step away from the van and try to pull free and run off I shriek loud as he squeezes my wrist tightly and pulls it down a little forcing me to fall onto my knees tears swelling in my eyes not long after. He holds my small wrist firm and tight in his broad hand as I try to struggle free, trying to stand up on my feet and wriggling my small wrist in his strong hand.
I look up at Daniel watching me, pleading for his help. For a moment he just stands there an extra longer as if debating whether I had enough or not, he then nods his head at the tall man and finally the giant hand lets my wrist go. I rub the red hand mark, the bruises of his fingertips already appearing in crimson.
Daniel bends down next to me and lifts me back into the van; I let him without a fight still rubbing my wrist in pain, groaning, tears still in my eyes.
I told them I hated them all a million times like I was a little kid – Daniel, Nick, The Warden the men in black, all of them.
We drive into town for a bit and then we stop – the tall man and Daniel walking into a little shop casually as if they had every right to be there.
I sit up to see anyone that I know – that would actually help me and not make a scene.
Almost 20 minutes later I happen to see Billy walking around near the van, I really didn’t want him to help but I guess he was my only choice; I knock on the glass and yell out his name. He looks around dumb-founded, and then finally notices I was in the van. He jogs towards me and stands in front of the small round glass. I told him I needed help and that he needs to open the doors – I couldn’t because there were no doors inside only outside.
‘What’s in it for me?’ he teases with that cheeky grin of his.
‘Billy, please!’ I plead.
‘Alright, alright, calm down.’
When he opens the door I jump out and say thank you. I grab his wrist and walk away fast from the van and before I knew it we were pretty much sprinting as soon as I hear Daniel scream out my name.
We run and walk for a long time before stopping at a park I have never been to, although it did seem familiar. We sit on the park bench and just sit there in silence watching children play in the huge grassy park with trees all around.
‘You okay?’ he asks turning his head and looking at the side of my face. I stay quiet for a while still angry about what happened last night. ‘Look, I just want you to know that I haven’t forgiven you just yet, cos what you did… it was… wrong.’
‘Oh, so taking you out of a locked van wasn’t enough for you?’ he jokes but his eyes were questioning and searching my face. Anger bubbled inside me again as his innocent smile ligers on his face. ‘It’s not about “what’s enough” Billy, there’s no repaying for what you did,’ I say doing my best at keeping a neutral face.
He stops smiling and looks at me more serious, ‘I know and I’m sorry. I just thought… I thought you wouldn’t have mind after that night in the shelter… you know – before Jack and Luke walked in.’ He says and instead of an innocent smile his eyes played innocent as he searched my face once again. I felt my face flush and I look away straight after, ‘nothing happened that night Billy.’ I say, but even I didn’t believe myself as I said it. Was that what would have happened if Jack and Luke hadn’t walked in? Did I want it to happen?
‘Come on Remy; don’t play riddles and lies with me.’ He says now looking at green oval as well. I felt my jaw tense, ‘just don’t, Billy. I don’t need this right now.’ I say refusing to say please which was right at the tip of my tongue.
He looks at me again and softens his face, his features more forgiving and gentle – more appealing than usual. I look away before anything would happen. If anything would happen. And felt my stomach clench.
I stand up and go to walk away not wanting to deal with anything right now, but Billy grabs hold of my hand firmly but not tight so that I had to look him in the eye. ‘I’m sorry Remy,’ he says quietly pulling me closer toward him without a thought. Before I knew it I was in his arms and even though I wanted to hate him, I did – I do. I just couldn’t pull away even as he let my hand go and just stood in front of me.
Before the sun started to set we headed for the meadows where we ended up on the festival night. He explains that I wouldn’t want to go to his house because he didn’t really have one instead he lived in a motel full of people I wouldn’t like, so he decided to come here to the shelter. I looked around and found a heap of blankets on top of a haystack and I couldn’t help but laugh.
We watched the sun go down and talked until we could see all the stars shining bright and the town start to quiet down sleep. We stayed up until it felt like heavy weights were dangling from our eye lids but still we kept talking and opening our eyes feebly. We finally lay on our backs now whispering to each other as we were too tired to talk aloud, we told jokes until all the jokes were shared, made up funny and scary stories until we couldn’t think of any more and before I knew it I was asleep.