OMG So this is the chapter ive been wanting to show u guys!!!
-Carmen Silvers Point Of View-
Although I did see Austin last night, as hard as I studied him he didn’t seem any difference than usual. Just a little tired. We didn’t really do anything last night besides kiss and talk for a bit before we slept…mainly because I wanted to make sure Austin was actually sleeping and not just lying to me and saying he was when he wasn’t.
But he did sleep, albeit somewhat restlessly.
So now, in my second period class where we were in a computer lab for a free period, I was attempting to Google different sicknesses with Austin’s symptoms. It was a pointless effort; nothing there matched.
So instead, Kayla, Lena and I decided to Google random stuff and see what popped up. Lena, who was sitting between us, searched ‘Different kisses’. She clicked on the first link that popped up and began reading.
She then started giggling and told us to read along with her. The website she had clicked on had a list of twenty different kinds of kisses, describing how to do each one and what they mean when you do them.
Some were kind of obvious like French Kissing, I mean seriously, who doesn’t know what French Kissing is? Others were kind of weird, though vaguely ironic like vampire kisses…which is basically what Austin and I do quite often.
But the one I remember most is the Breath Kiss. Apparently it’s more of a game than a kiss; you have to inhale deeply, kiss your partner then exhale into their mouth while they inhale so you’re like giving them your air and you just keep doing that back and forth until you run out of air or giggle.
We laughed so hard at that and we all vowed to try it at least once in our life for fun.
The rest of my day was pretty much boring after that, I had nothing interesting to do besides listen to teachers drone on and on and on about things that are pointless and useless to me.
The only two things that happened that brought me out of my bored mood were Austin and science class.
Science class was quite the…eye opener. We had continued watching the journey of sperm, seeing all the microscopic sperm swimming around uselessly for another twenty minutes before the screen suddenly flashed a bright white and suddenly all you saw on the screen was a woman screaming and sweating as she tried to push a baby out. Normally, that’d be okay. Except the camera’s point of view was right between her legs, so one you could see the baby coming out, two you could see her…area and how big it was while she gave birth.
As soon as that popped up on screen there were a bunch of startled cries and shouts of ‘EW!’ and ‘OH MY GOD THAT’S DISGUSTING!’ One guy even shouted, “IT’S SO HAIRY!” which of course made other guys comment on how the lady should have shaved down there before doing this video while everyone else burst out laughing.
{OMG ME WRITING ITS SO HAIRY WAS FUNNY]
Most girls and even several boys turned their heads around so they wouldn’t have to see it.
The teacher shushed us and everyone fell quiet although you could still hear quiet giggles.
I just gaped at the screen and got the sudden urge to giggle, so I turned my head, clapped a hand over my mouth and prayed to God that I wouldn’t laugh out loud.
When I turned my head I turned it towards Austin to see him doing the same thing as me. We both burst into the quietest laughter we could manage.
“That was so ugly,” I laughed, clutching my sides.
“I know,” he said laughing as well.
The lady was still screaming in the background, but if you weren’t watching the video it sounded really dirty all her heavy breathing and groaning and screaming.
After ten minutes of the screaming pregnant lady the video was finally over and everyone immediately talking about how gross it was and several girls were saying that they were never ever going to get pregnant and how some of them probably won’t be able to have sex anymore because they were so traumatized.
Of course, that might have been the point of making us watch the video… but I digress.
Austin and I finally calmed down and stopped laughing, only to have Austin start coughing. This was really starting to worry me; his coughs were deep and hoarse, wracking his entire frame and now they just seemed to be more and more frequent with every day that passed.
I watched him helplessly, wishing I could do something, anything at all even if it was just rubbing his back but knowing I couldn’t, not in front of everyone and certainly not in front of my pack.
Since the lights were still off I put my hand on his leg, rubbing his leg for a moment under the table. It was the best I could do given the circumstances while I waited for the coughing to stop.
When he finally did, his hands were shaking and he looked exhausted. Several people, actually most of the class, turned to shoot Austin a disgusted look.
We ignored them all. I chewed my lip as he cleared his throat.
“Are you okay?” I whispered.
“Yeah,” he croaked.
I felt my eyebrows knit together and he must have caught my look because he put his hand over mine, taking it for a moment as he squeezed it.
“I’m fine,” he said hoarsely, but I could hear how doubtful even he was.
I shook my head at him, pulling my hand away, “We’ll talk about this later,” I said as the lights were switched on, ending our conversation.
I saw his jaw tighten as he tensed in his seat, folding his arms as he stared with a blank expression at the front of the class.
For the remainder of science we went over notes and once the bell rang everyone jumped up and hurried out the door.
Kayla and Matt were waiting for me just outside the class and I joined them without once even glancing in Wyatt’s direction.
“Jeez, what is up with Austin?” Matt asked, frowning, “That was some pretty bad coughing.”
I ground my teeth together, “I know.”
“Are you okay Carmen? You seem kind of tense,” Kayla asked, looking worried.
“I’m fine,” I said, attempting to keep my tone cool. It’s Austin4 who’s not fine, I thought grimly as I felt a ping in my gut.
Her frown deepened as we went to English, but I ignored it. I was too focused on Austin. Why did he keep denying that there was nothing wrong, when something was obviously wrong with him?
I growled in frustration, internally of course or else I most definitely would have gotten weird looks from everyone in my English class.
Tonight we were going to talk about it; no distractions. I was fairly certain Austin wouldn’t be able to seduce me into going off-topic, but then again, who knew?
********
“So…when are you going to admit that there’s something wrong?” I asked, pulling away from Austin for a minute, breathing hard.
I was straddling him in my bed, like usual. And of course, since we were still slightly…starved, I guess you could say, from last week’s lack of physical contact with each other we had practically jumped each other when he came to visit tonight.
“What?” he asked, frowning.
“Something’s wrong,” I said, putting one hand on either side of Austin’s head, flat against my headboard while I straddled him. “Admit it already.”
He sighed in exasperation, passing a hand over his face, “Admitting it won’t make it go away,” he muttered.
“Ah-ha!” I cried victoriously, “I knew it!”
“Fine!” he threw up his hands in the air in a gesture of surrender, “Something’s wrong and it’s been bothering me for a while. Happy now?”
I stroked his cheek, “No,” I said softly, “Something’s still wrong.”
“I told you admitting it wouldn’t help,” he sighed, closing his eyes.
“Still, can’t we at least try and figure out what it is?” I asked, rubbing my thumb across his cheek.
“How?” he asked, “Going to see a doctor is out of the question and I don’t know any other vampires outside of my coven that went through this.”
I groaned, “I know, I know. But maybe the books have something about it.”
“I’ll have to remember to check them, but how do we know this is even serious? Maybe I’m just subconsciously bothered by what happened to you in that cave or something,” he said, opening his eyes.
“Austin23,” I said firmly, taking his face firmly in both my hands as I leaned close to his face.
“Something is wrong,” I said slowly, “Vampires don’t get sick, which means this is serious.”
His lips pressed into a grim line and he closed his eyes again.
I sighed, kissing him softly on the lips, “I’m sorry for bringing it up all the time.”
“No, you’re right to want to talk about it,” he said, shaking his head.
He looked so grim, so worried now that it made me almost sick to think that I keep bringing it up and making him that way.
I wanted to make him smile again.
“Do you want to try something?” I asked suddenly.
“Try what?” he asked tiredly, looking vaguely curious as he opened his eyes.
“Well, we had a free period this morning and Lena was looking up different kinds of kisses,” I said, “And we found one that was kind of like a game.”
“A game?” he questioned, arching an eyebrow.
I smiled, “Yeah. One person inhales then kisses their partner. The person who just inhaled exhales into their partners mouth while their partner inhales so you’re ‘passing’ your breath to them. Your partner does the same thing and you keep ‘passing’ the air back and forth until you run out of air or laugh.”
“You guys seriously research this stuff on your free time?” he asked, one corner of his mouth quirking up in a half-smile.
“Hey, that was Lena not me,” I said, chuckling.
He wrapped his arms around my waist, “Well, this should be interesting,” he commented. “You start.”
I scrunched up my face at him, taking a deep breath before I pressed my lips against his. His lips parted and I exhaled into his mouth. I felt his chest rise as he inhaled my air, and felt it fall as he exhaled into my mouth.
His breath tickled my mouth and I grinned, which made him smile, which made me chuckle. I pulled away, “That tickles,” I said.
“No kidding,” he said, inhaling deeply before he pressed his lips against mine and exhaled.
I inhaled his air, struggling to keep from smiling as I exhaled back at him. We did it a few more times before suddenly, as I was inhaling, Austin slid his tongue into my mouth.
I was so surprised that I choked on the air I just inhaled. I pulled away, choking and laughing while Austin just laughed at me.
“Austin!” I croaked, clearing my throat, “You made me choke!”
“Sorry,” he grinned impishly, “I couldn’t resist.”
I glowered at him, kissing him firmly as I bit his lower lip and ground the lower half of my body against him.
He moaned into my mouth, his hands gripping the back of my shirt in tight fists. I ran my fingers through his hair as he dropped his head so his lips were pressed against my neck.
“No hickeys,” I breathed as his teeth grazed my neck.
“No fun,” he said, sounding disappointed.
I chuckled somewhat breathlessly, “You’ll live.”
He growled playfully at me as I started to shift my hips so I was moving against him. He writhed underneath me, a moan passing through his lips as he kissed my neck.
I pulled my hands from his hair, trailing them down the sides of his face and neck, resting them on his broad shoulders before I slid them down his chest and stomach. I felt every tense muscle of his body as I gingerly grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it upwards.
He let go of my waist as I took his shirt off and as soon as I tossed his shirt to the floor he put his hands on my thighs, inching them upwards.
I drew one finger along his chest and he shuddered as he kissed me. I smirked, feeling his hand run along the back of my leg, lifting me up off his lap for a moment. I felt his hand slid between my legs, pressing firmly against me with only my underwear as a barrier between his hand and my flesh.
The hand that had been on the back of my leg trailed upwards, underneath my shirt and came to rest on my rib cage, his thumb resting on my breast as I moaned, arching against his hand.
So much for talking about what was wrong.
********
“Carmen,” someone said and I felt a movement behind me.
“Carmen, please,” the tone edged on desperate.
I squeezed my eyes shut tighter, “No, no please!” the voice said, and I heard heavy pants.
I rubbed my eyes, attempting to wake myself up as I rolled over and I struggled to open my eyes. I looked around the dark room, seeing Austin lying down, restlessly turning over, muscles jerking stiffly, “Carmen,” he said.
“What?” I whispered, noticing the sheen of sweat on his face because of the faint moon light shining on him through my window.
He didn’t answer, “Carmen, please,” he begged, “Save me.”
Fear shot through me, "Austin?” I asked uncertainly, reaching out to touch his arm.
He jerked away from me with a startled cry, “Carmen,” he begged again, “Don’t leave me.”
“Austin, I’m not leaving you,” I said desperately, trying to wake him up.
“Please, save me,” he begged, his body jerked, pain and fear clear on his face.
“Austin, wake up,” I said, reaching out to touch his clammy forehead. As soon as my finger touched his skin he shot upright, his hand grabbing my wrist so tight that I thought it might snap in his hand as he yanked me into a sitting position.
His eyes flew open, silver blazing wildly in the dark as his grip tightened on my wrist. A whimper sounded in my throat as he glared at me, his silver eyes darkening, turning a dark grey color, looking as hard as steel as they pierced me.
"Austin,” I pleaded, feeling tears sting my eyes as his hand twisted my wrist slightly too much than my normal range.
Something flickered in his eyes, and he shook his head, his grip tightening further on my wrist.
I bit my lip to keep from crying out, but a whimper escaped as several tears rolled down my cheeks from pain.
“Austin,” I cried, “You’re hurting me.”
His hand suddenly let go of my wrist, dropping it limply into my lap. I cradled my throbbing wrist, struggling to stop the tears from falling anymore.
“Carmen?” he questioned slowly, as if coming out of a daze, his eyes returning to their normal color but they remained unfocused.
I didn’t answer; I just squeezed my eyes shut tightly and I cried silently, cradling my wrist in my lap.
“Oh my- Carmen, I’m so sorry. I don’t-I didn’t,” he struggled with coherent speech. I saw his hand reach for me and I instinctively jerked away from him, stumbling back onto my sore wrist.
I cried out, biting my tongue to shut myself up. I bit so hard I tasted blood as I scrambled backwards, pressing against my headboard as I watched Austin wide eyed, tears still streaming down my face.
Hurt, guilt and fear were clear on his face and I felt horrible.
It wasn’t his fault he hurt me, he didn’t do it intentionally, so why did I pull away as if I was scared of him?
“I’m sorry,” he said softly, his normal silver eyes gazing at me sadly.
I watched him for a moment before I crawled over to him, keeping my right hand from touching anything since my wrist still throbbed painfully.
He held one hand up slowly so as not to startle me and I took it with my good hand, letting him help me to sit properly before his arms wrapped around me.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, Carmen,” he whispered, burying his face in my hair. I heard his desperate tone, and that just made me cry harder. Austin kept repeating it, over and over again, holding me tightly in his arms.
“Austin, stop,” I said hoarsely, squeezing my eyes shut tightly as I tried to stop the tears from flowing.
He fell silent, but held me tighter. He suddenly pulled away, picking up my wrist with his hands carefully.
With one finger, he drew it along the length of my wrist and hand, pressing harder in certain spots, making me wince or making my breath catch in my throat in pain.
He dipped his head, kissing my still throbbing wrist, before he looked me in the face, his eyes looking sad.
“Don’t say you’re sorry,” I said hoarsely, “It’s not your fault.”
“Yes, it is,” he said, taking my other hand in his, “I shouldn’t have spent the night.”
He shook his head furiously, “Something is wrong with me. I knew that but I tried to deny it. I knew about the nightmares but I ignored it.”
“What are you saying?” I whispered, gazing at him.
He cupped my face in his hands, “I’m saying that maybe I shouldn’t spend the night anymore,” he said, looking soulfully at me.
“No,” I said firmly, this time shaking my head at him, “No.”
"Carmen, I hurt you,” he said.
“I know that,” I snapped. I looked away for a moment, gathering my thoughts before I looked back up at him, “You could have hurt me anytime at all Austin, still completely by accident, but that doesn’t mean we should stop seeing each other because of an accident.”
“But what if it happens again?” he argued, keeping his tone low, but it was harsh and rough.
“Then it happens again,” I said, pulling my hands away from him, “People get hurt Austin, you can’t just give up because of it, things happen and you can’t stop them.”
“I’m not giving up,” he said, taking my hands back, “I’m just saying we shouldn’t spend the night together until I get this under control.”
He met my gaze with those sad eyes of his, “I don’t want to hurt you again, Carmen. My nightmares are getting worse and obviously I’m acting out because of them,” he squeezed my hands.
I winced in pain when he squeezed my right hand, sending pain through my wrist.
He must have seen my expression because he kissed my wrist gingerly and let go, “I promise we can still be together, just not in bed until I fix this.”
“You fix this?” I questioned, arching an eyebrow, “How do you plan on doing that?”
He was silent for a moment as he looked down at our hands, “I don’t know,” he admitted before looking back up at me, “But I will figure out a way to fix this.”
“Promise?” I asked, feeling tears prick my eyes again.
“I promise,” he said, sealing the promise with a kiss.
He cradled my face in his hands, wiping my tears away with his thumbs before he kissed my forehead. Austin pushed me down slowly, tucking me under the covers.
“Go back to sleep,” he whispered, brushing the hair out of my face.
“Don’t go,” I pleaded, trying to sit up but he held me down.
“I’ll be back tomorrow night, okay?” he said, forcing a smile.
I shook my head, wanting to protest but knowing it was useless. He walked away and I sat up as he picked up his shirt and pulled it on. He walked back to my side of the bed, kissing my forehead again as I lay down and he pulled my sheets up to cover me.
“Goodnight, Carmen,” he whispered, his breath swirling in my face before he walked away.
I couldn’t watch him leave; I just couldn’t. So I closed my eyes and heard his soft footsteps on the floorboards. I heard him hesitate at my window before he finally slid it open. I heard him slid out, sliding the window shut with a quiet click before I was alone in the dark.
His voice echoed in my head.
Carmen, please.
Carmen, don’t leave me.
I shuddered, remembering how dark his silver eyes had turned and the fear on his face as he slept.
Carmen, please, save me.
A tear rolled down my cheek and I let it. How can I save him when I don’t know what to save him from?
Please, Carmen, his desperate voice said in my head.
I whimpered in response as I drifted off into a restless sleep, images and sounds flashing past my closed lids faster than I could take them in.
I scrutinized him as he walked. He looked…uncoordinated. Awkward. At first, I thought maybe it was just my mind playing tricks on me since I was so worried about him maybe I was just seeing things.
But then he tripped.
Austin has never tripped.
His normally graceful way of moving about seemed awkward, as if he couldn’t quite get proper control over his body.
“I saw it through his eyes; it was as if I was Caleb. I felt so…excited causing you pain but at the same time I felt so sick with myself,” he shuddered, pain twisting his features.
“Then it changed again,” he said softly, “I saw myself killing him. Over and over again before it suddenly changed. Suddenly I was Caleb again, seeing myself kill Caleb through his eyes. I felt the knife pierce my throat and-” he stopped abruptly, probably at my horrified expression…
Caleb, I thought the name in my mind, disgust and hate oozing from every syllable.
And then suddenly the parade of images flashing through my mind stopped, resting on the image of Austin. He smiled at me and I walked towards him as he opened his arms and wrapped them around me.
“You’re next,” a voice hissed in my ear, “You will always be next.”
I stiffened, recognizing the words and voice from my nightmares. I pulled away from Austin, only to see Caleb standing there, his arms wrapped around me.
I screamed.
Carmen, save me, Austin’s voice echoed around me, and then everything went black.
________________________________________________________________________________
Gah! Cheez Wiz I feel so bad for Carmen and Austin DX
Damn, I feel so evil for creating so much drama, but then again it's kind of the point of the story so....not completely my fault.
By the way, funky little dream bit for Carmen O.o poor girl always has nightmares..though hers aren't as bad as Austin's anymore.
So i probably bored u guys but yeah this was the um chapter XD And
QUESTION
"wtf do you think is up with the nightmares"
HINT: Caleb ;)
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~Mahomie