© Copyright Nicole Nelson, 2011
Brandon's POV-
Gracie and I passed each other in the hallway and although our eyes met through the crowd we walked right by each other as we had been doing for weeks since I stormed out of her house. Paul, who had enrolled in another town's school after we returned to school, was no longer a problem and the coaches never found out about our fight. So the college football scholarship was still on. Todd and our teammate Adam were at my side discussing their excitement for college.
"I just can't wait to graduate! College is going to be great." Todd beamed. "Only one more month of this." He swept his hand out, gesturing the classroom doors we were passing and the other students.
Of course Todd was excited; he wasn't moving any great distance away from our hometown. Kristy wouldn't graduate until next year and he would never consider living anywhere without her. My stomach knotted at that thought. Adam slapped my back and jolted me back to the conversation.
"Come on, man. Imagine the college girls." He smirked, clearly baffled at my lack of excitement.
Adam was accepted into OSU last month and had been hanging around me and talking non-stop about college girls ever since.
"Yeah." I tried to fiend enthusiasm but failed miserably.
Adam frowned momentarily, obviously wondering why all of a sudden girls were the last thing on my mind. Todd, who seemed to understand my need to be left alone to my thoughts, engaged Adam in a discussion over which fraternity to join. I tagged along at their side and tried to force myself to feel excited about college and a new chapter to my life.
* * *
Time had really flown by. My summer classes along with college football practice would be starting in about six weeks and I would be moving into my dorm in about five. I chose to avoid prom and dad had bought two plane tickets for the two of us to tour my new campus together over that weekend. It was huge and I felt overwelmed, knowing I would be wandering around here lost for at least the first few weeks.
Dad seemed especially proud that we were there together and I didn't want to ruin the mood by sulking. We stayed at a Holiday Inn and returned home the next day. The trip did nothing but increase my edginess. On the plane ride there I looked out the window and let it impact me just how far away I would be moving.
The truth was, I was never the kind of kid who got homesick. If it weren't for Gracie I would be thrilled to go to this amazing school as far away from home as possible. And for that reason alone, I decided it was best to push thoughts of her to the back of my mind and get fully onboard with the end of high school festivities and the joy of college life that awaited.
Anxiety was faintly coursing through my veins thinking about how time to make things right with Gracie was running out like sand in an hourglass. The best plan of action would be to bury these mixed feelings deep down and move forward. I had already missed prom and I refused to miss any more events, most importantly the after graduation parties that were already being planned.
But the best plan wasn't the easiest. I could no longer ignore her or the feelings we both so clearly had. I was fed up with the awkwardness and the silent stares in the hallway; being around our friends in the same room but not acknowledging each other; fighting the urge to text her or drop by her house when I was bored or needed to talk.
I paced the floor in my front of my couch and decided it was time to come clean about how I felt.