Max's POV-
It feels like I've been here for forever. All I see is darkness, an endless void of nothingness. What happened? That's when I heard a voice that pulled me back to reality.
"She has to wake up. She has to," someone said, it sounded pained and forced.
"For one, Max wouldn't want to see you like this. You haven't left this room since you got back here. I'm hurt too, you didn't even stop by to see if I was okay," another voice said.
"I'm sorry Jacob... It's just Max has been in this situation so many times since I met her and she's been out for days," I can only assume Logan mumbled.
"It's okay, Logan. She's gonna wake up. When have you known Max not to fight?"
That seemed to shut Logan up for the time being. I heard him sigh and then move away. He got up and walked away, to where I have no idea. But I couldn't help but think of where I was and what had happened recently.
An obnoxious beeping sound that I just noticed started to beep louder and faster. I tried t open my eyes but it felt like they were cemented shut. I was getting frustrated that I couldn't open my eyes. I gathered up all the strength I had in me, which wasn't a lot at the moment, and forcefully opened my eyes.
The room was dimly lit. I looked around the room and no one was in the room with me anymore and I wondered where Logan went. Did he leave? I tried to sit up, but a pain shot through my shoulder. I winced slightly and gently laid back down.
I tried sitting up again, this time expecting the pain as I did so. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and realized I was in the pack infirmary. There was an IV in my arm, that I casually ripped out and stood up on wobbly legs. I didn't hear anyone come in the room, so I kept attempting to find the door out of here.
"Max!" I heard someone yell from behind me and loud fast steps following it.
I was engulfed in a huge bear hug and I just stood there shook at what is happening. I felt pleasurable shocks shoot through my arms and I knew immediately it was Logan. He buried his head in the crook of my neck and began to kiss my skin lightly.
"Logan, wh-what happened? Why am I here?" I asked him as cupped my face with his hands.
Just as he was about to answer my questions the door to the room burst open. A little girl ran in and up to me. She hugged my legs, almost making me fall to the ground, thankfully Logan caught me. I looked up at Logan confusedly, but he just nodded his head towards the girl.
I crouched down to her level and lifted her chin up so she would look at me. Her eyes. Her dark blue eyes. Lana. Everything came back to me. My kills... I killed again. I swore never to do that again, and yet I did...
Again, the door to the room opened and Jacob rushed in, and I noticed the slight limp and how his arm was in a way protecting his ribs. He stopped abruptly and stared at me wide eyed. I picked Lana up and handed her to Jacob, but not without promising her to see her later. Jacob thankfully seemed to understand what was about to happen and took Lana out of the room.
I turned to Logan and just broke down.
Tears streamed down my face as my my knees buckled from beneath me sending me to the floor. Logan didn't catch me and was quickly by my side on the floor gathering me in his arms. He took us back to the bed with me on his lap, trying to calm me down. his caring whispers and calming words didn't do anything, though.
I looked up to Logan to find him already looking down at me with his worried golden eyes. We always found ourselves in this position. I was always breaking and he was always trying to fix me. This was fair for him. He deserves better.
"Logan..." I whispered in a croaky voice.
"Shh, go to sleep. I'll take you home. Don't worry," he cooed and I did what he said, I went to sleep.
"Come on, sweetie. Just shoot him and you live," his voice sneered.
"And if I don't?" I dared ask.
"Then I shoot you."
I didn't want to die, not now, not like this. But why didn't I? I've been wanting to die for awhile, so why not now?
I look at the bloodied, limp figure in front of me. I closed my eyes and pulled the trigger to the gun. The loud shot went off, hitting the person in the head and they slumped to the ground with blood pooling around their head. I dropped the gun to me feet, I started at the dead man before me, lifeless... dead. I just killed a man. This man had a family and a life and I took that away from him...
I sank to the floor and continued to stare at the limp body of the man I just killed. My kidnapper patted me on the shoulder, as if showing pride of what I just did, and started to leave, but stopped to say something.
"You live another day, my little killer, but you may not get to tell the tale."
But I did, though I never did tell the tale.
I woke up screaming at the memory. I thrashed around in the bed but I couldn't move, I was trapped by something, something was holding me down.
My breathing were short forced gasps and I tried everything to regulate it but nothing. I was being held down. I was trapped. Trapped again. This can't be happening again. Nothing was helping, I was only making it worse.
The hold around me loosened and then completely vanished. I was staring at the dark ceiling and then a face appeared above mine. First thinking it was my kidnapper I screamed out, but then noticed the golden eyes telling me it obviously was him. I saw his lips moving but i heard nothing. Then it started to come through to me.
"Max, you got to breathe. Deep breaths! Look at me and breathe!" a voice that was so familiar yelled to me taking my face in his hands.
It didn't help, I was still hyperventilating and my eyes started to water now and black dots appeared. I didn't want to pass out again. That's when the man gripped my face tighter and brought his lips down to mine and the great sensation of warmth spread through me in a calming effect. It help... that has never happened before. My breathing became normal for the most part.
That's when I finally registered the man as Logan. He was still holding my face and his golden eyes were wide. He was obviously worried but he didn't know what to do what sit there and wait for me to come back.
Even when Logan thought I told him everything, I still kept shit to myself. I still kept secrets of my past from him. I was so ashamed of myself.
"L-Logan," I stuttered his name as I buried my face in the crook of his neck.
"Shh, it's okay, you're okay," he replies calmly.
"Am I okay?" I questioned myself.
Logan either didn't hear me or choose not to answer me, which I am glad for, because I am breaking... Falling apart more and more as the seconds tick by. This is exactly what I was scared of. This right here, me completely losing it and breaking down. Logan wanted to help, but he didn't know how and I didn't want him to. I didn't want him to have to go through this. He deserved so much more, so much better.
I untangle myself form Logan and walk to the bathroom to see if I can feel better after a take a shower.
Logan's POV-
I watched Max's retreating figure go into the bathroom.
I don't know what to do anymore. I can see her breaking faster and fast but she isn't letting me help her. I can see she wants me to, but something pulls her back to prevent me from helping her. She tries to put on a brave face and hide the fact she is falling apart, but everyone is beginning to see through it and she knows it.
I get up form the bed after awhile and go to the bathroom door and knock softly. I hear Max moving around but she takes a minute before replying.
"Yeah?" she whispered.
"I'm going to the kitchen, come down there when you're done please," I murmured through the door in an almost pleading voice.
I heard her say "okay," so I left our room and went down to the kitchen. I was glad I was met with everyone there, including my mom. Jacob and Geena were now sitting pretty close to each other now, but this was not the time to tease them. Macey was there but she was coloring with Lana so they weren't paying attention to any of us.
I walked over to the island in the middle of the kitchen and flopped down on one of the barstools and rubbed my hands over my face. I waited for the onslaught of questions.
"Is Max okay? We heard her scream and were about to go up there when, but then it stopped," Geena exclaimed.
"I don't know anymore," I started, "When we were at Alpha James' there was a rogue attack and Max being max went to help and was put at one of the safe rooms to protect, there were supposed to be a few more pack warriors down there to help but they never came so she was by herself. She had to fight off quite a few rogues and took them all down and got wounded pretty bad in the process. She blacked out there obviously and when she woke up here she wasn't the same."
"Wounded how bad?" Mom questioned next.
"Shot to the shoulder and graze to the size. They were coated with wolfsbane, and her being half werewolf the affects of the bane was pretty bad. She also had many claw punctures from the shifted rogues. It was bad and she almost didn't make it," I explained in a strained voice.
"S-she's okay now?" Geena murmured.
"Physically for the most part, yes. Mentally, I have not he slightest damn clue. Something at the rogue attack triggered something and I don't know what.
Geena was about to say or ask something else but stopped with her mouth open looking over my shoulder. Her eyes were wide with curiosity and worry. SHe quickly shut her mouth and I looked over my shoulder, too, to see Max standing in the doorway in sweatpants and a baggy long sleeve on. She looked at all of us and went over to the fridge.
"I know you were all talking about me," she stated quietly.
Nobody was saying anything. I was scared if I said anything she would be set off again and would break down.
It was a very tense silence as Max grabbed the strawberries and started to cut them on the counter besides me. Everyone in the room could feel it, even Macey and Lana. Both little girls looked up to the room and then slowly gathered their things and left without a second thought. I wish I could do that.
"Shit," Max said to herself.
Her finger was bleeding from cutting it. Max froze in her place, not even breathing. Her hand was held up to her face, to the blood was running down her hand and arm. I quickly shot up form my seat and walked over to her and grabbed her wrist carefully. I wrapped a towel around her finger to help stop the bleeding.
Max must've snapped out of what ever trance she was in. She tried to push me away but I didn't budge.
"Let me go," Max said quietly, but sternly, to me.
"Why?"
"Let me go!" Max screams and pushes me away.
I let her go and watched as she stumbled trying to get out of the room. I looked over to everyone else who had worried and scared expressions.
I ran out after Max, but I didn't make it that far becasue in the hallway right outside the kitchen I found Max sinking to the floor. She brought her knees to her chest and hid her face.
I walked over to her and sat besides her but she used one on her arms to push me away and scooted away herself away from me.
"Stay away from me," she demanded.
"Max-" I tried.
"Go away! You shouldn't want to be here!" she yelled in a hoarse voice.
"Why wouldn't I want to be near you, Max?" I asked.
Max raised her head and looked me dead in the eyes with broken eyes that tore me in half. All I wanted to do was hold her in my arms and take away her pain, but I know she wouldn't let me come near her.
"Because I'm a murderer..." she whispered.
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Hullo Giraffes!
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plz excuse mistakes =]
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