Fuck my life.
I've shifted and all my clothes have been shredded to pieces and I can't find my gun. Not being able to sniff it out isn't exactly helping either. As much as I would like to just leave it, I can't. There's too many trouble making youths these days and if a gun happened to land in the wrong hands, I would be the only one to blame. If a kid found it and played with it, out of curiosity, I could think of 101 different things that could happen.
Using my paws and snout, I searched through the leaves and bushes until something black and shiny caught my eye. Found it. I dug a small hole with my front paws, picked up the semi-automatic pistol with my mouth/snout, dropped it gently in the hole and covered it up with the soil I dug up using my hind legs. I ripped some flowers from the ground and matted them on top, so I know where to dig up once I've finished with my run.
I gave my wolf full control, hoping she won't go hunting for our mate so she could get jiggy with him. Yes ladies and gents, my wolf has an obsession with finding our mate. Me on the other hand... Blegh. I took off sprinting, for around four hours I forgot about all the worries is life. I just let go, ran all different directions, rolled around on my back heck I even tried to catch a butterfly! Okay it wasn't a butterfly, more like a moth. I couldn't care less, it felt the same, I felt like a pup again.
"Why can't you start searching for our mate?"
I sighed, "I would but... I don't want to."
"Grr "
"Bite me."
It was getting dark and I was getting tired. Luckily for me, I knew these woods like the back of my hand and I had wolfy vision to help. I trotted my way back to where the pistol was buried and I got control over my body again. I was just about to shift when I realised I have no clothes, this is why shifting out of anger is not recommended.
Some pack members must have left some clothes lying around somewhere that I can 'borrow' and not return.
***Jazzie's POV:
Where is she? Something bad could have happened; she could be too drunk to walk home, she might have been arrested again, gotten into a fight, for all I know she could be high on drugs. I've chewed all my finger nails down to the nub and have no idea what to do. Mom and dad aren't much help either because they both went out to their 'mates.' Mates are suppose to make our lives easier not worse! But everything happens for a reason, right?
I stopped crying two hours ago because if I think about it, I want my parents to be happy. It doesn't matter whether they're mates or not. I feel quite betrayed and hurt though and I bet Alexis does too, they told us they were mates since we were in kindergarten!
I kept trying to talk to Alexis using mind link but her walls are all up. I can't say I'm surprised though, she was always good at blocking the rest of the world. I love my sister yet I envy her because that's not the only thing she's good at; she's practically good at everything! Because of her behaviour, the school therapist suggetsted that she should join many clubs to occupy her time and distract her to keep her out of trouble.
She never really stuck with anything for too long though... She'd often set her self difficult targets for herself, most which could end up hurting her, complete it and move on to another sport or sometimes she'd get kicked out for being bad. Like in eighth grade she done gymnastics she her 'target' was to master a senior gymnastics routine, which she did! At the age of 13! In two and a half months! I guess you could call my sister a thrill seeker. While I was trying to get all my ballet routines close to perfection, she was out doing:
-Gymnastics
-Soccer
-Football
-Baseball
-Swimming
-Boxing
-Basketball
-BMXing
and the list goes on..
Ms Davis (the therapist) encouraged her to do sports because it's what she excelled in, what Alexis didn't know was that she was encouraged her to do sports because she thought the sports would tire her out and she'd have no energy left. That didn't work. Ms Davis was keen on her doing boxing because she thought it was a way of letting her get all her anger out on a punch bag (or someone who's geared up) rather than another student, not help her work on her punches. So that idea didn't work either.
I don't think Ms Davis is a therapist anymore...
She's even good at 'feminine' activities, as mom called it. Mom didn't want her rough housing with the boys, so she made her take cooking and dressmaking classes. Which she was actually really good at. But she wasn't in those clubs for long. She got kicked out of dressmaking because she kept pocking people in the bum with pins and she got kicked out of cooking because of the food fights. She even practiced at home but made me take all the credit because she said she doesn't want mom to make her be even more girly. I can't lie and say I didn't like the attention though.
There was even a time when we were twelve and mom made her take ballet classes with me. Madam Claudia was shouting at me for knocking over her 'star student,' Layla, Alexis took the blame and said that that she pushed her. She was getting screamed at for fifteen minutes straight, while I cried in the corner like the pathetic wimp I am. Alexis didn't cry, shout or even talk back in her usual sarcastic tone. She simply waited until she was finished shouting, spat in her face, walked to the front desk and asked the lady behind the counter to call mom and tell her to pick her up.
In all fairness Madam Claudia deserved it, as harsh as it may sound. The things she was saying was rude, too rude. But now she picks on me more than everyone else. I told dad once and he had a word with her but she just said that I'm one of the best little ballerinas but I need to work harder so I can be the best. Madam Claudia has always been horrible, she says she's 'pushing us to reach our best potential.'
Thinking of the old memories, like when Alexis tried to teach me how to throw a punch, bought a smile to my face but that smile was quickly wiped off my face when my body started to heat up. Again.
My heart beat accelerated as my whole body felt as if it was on fire. I fell to the floor with a thud and my vision became so blurry I could hardly see the furniture in my room. I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth, forbidding the scream to escape my lips. A small white thing came out of my mouth and fell on the floor. I guess I'm going to school with a chipped tooth tomorrow. I couldn't hold it in anymore I let out the painful scream that was full of hurt, anger, betrayal and sadness that I was trying to keep in. He was at it again. My mate was with another.
My whole body was sweating. A puddle of sweat lay around me, but this was not the end. This was the beginning. I repeatedly felt like someone was pulling my heart roughly but never pulling so hard that it would rip out of my body so the pain will not end. I needed to scream, but I couldn't. I wanted to vomit, but I couldn't. I wanted to die, but I couldn't. I should've the overdose when I had the chance, at least if I died I would be at peace in doggy heaven.
I've screamed the word help so many times that I can't scream anymore. My wolf was whimpering and howling inside of me, shifting would only make this worse, I learnt that the hard way. My chest was heaving up and down as I tried to catch my breath.
"FOR FUCK SAKE!" Someone screamed. Whoever it was knelt beside me, stroking my hair, repeating 'it's going to be ok,' I knew it was going to be anything but ok.
"This happened to few people I knew at school. Tense all your muscles and don't stop until the pain has all gone." The voice continued.
I done as I was instructed and stayed like this for what felt like 1000 years, while the the person kept saying soothing words and stroked my hair. I opened my eyes, trying to blink away the tears. Everything was still blurry but I could make out Alexis in a giant white tee stroking my hair. She looked pissed with a capital P.
"Just let me shoot him in his left eye."
"No." He's still my mate, despite what he's done to me, I'd forgive him in a second. Obviously it still hurts but I forgive him nonetheless,"you don't even own a gun." Why would she have a gun?
Her lips pursed in a thin line and she grimly nodded, "Your right, I don't own a gun. But say what you want, he isn't getting away with this. " I'm not happy with it. He's my mate and she's my sister. But I don't really want to disappoint my sister now do I?
"Come on then you can sleep in my bed tonight. By the way where the heck is mum and dad?" She asked.
"With their mates." At least they're happy, I reminded myself. Alexis' face went blank and she just shrugged her shoulders.
"You know I'm not going to live in the pack house right? If you go, I'll come and sleepover and stuff. But I don't want all these random wolves telling me what to do. I don't work like that. "
"If your not going, I'm not going. Simple" I grinned and she grinned right back, showing me her pearly whites.
***
We both got into our pajamas and were snuggled up under Alexis' bed cover, well I got into my pajamas and she got into some black jogging bottoms and a purple t shirt.
"Where's my uniform?" Alexis yawned.
"I put in in your closet; there's the blazer, shirt, tie, skirt, socks and shoes. The spare clothes are still in their packets in your drawers" I said sleepily.
"It's too cold to wear skirts."
"Girls aren't allowed trousers."
"Fuck that, g'night babe"
"Good night Lexis" I laughed softly.
I heard her lightly snoring, while I stayed wide awake. I really did miss my sister. Hopefully she won't get into any trouble and get me into trouble.
********
HI Wattpaders :)
Quick question, do you guys want more of Jazzie's POV of Alexis' POV in the future?