"Merry Christmas Alexandria!" my parents smiled brightly.
As we drove to the square down town, they sang along to the song that would get stuck in my head all day, Jingle Bells. I couldn't help but laugh and sing along while I jumped up and down in my seat. We all were so into the rhythm of the song, so happy and joyful, but it had to end in that moment like a knife jammed in my heart. It was the moment I had lost the two people I loved deeply my whole life. Our car slid on the slick, thin ice and my dad couldn't control the wheel, that was when we had the head on collision with a semi-truck.
I remember seeing fire, it was unbelievably hot that I was afraid that we would burn into ashes. The smell of gasoline filled my nose and I looked around me. Outside the window I could see the ambulance rushing towards our Acura. Realizing what had happened, I scanned the car for mom. There she was, unconscious and barely breathing. I screamed and called out for her, but her eyes never seemed to open.
The ambulance had found a way to open the door to our now burning car. They tried to pull my dad out first but he resisted and said that they needed to save his only daughter. It took a few seconds for them to comprehend and accept his request before they rushed to my side. They didn't even bother to grab my mother because her legs had been crushed. Crushed so much that nobody could do anything.
A woman and a man in their twenties lifted me up onto a gurney, coughing from the fumes coming from the car. All I could do was stare at the sky, how come the night sky was so empty? They probably ran away from the flames. I wish I could have been gone as those stars were that night, they didn't have to worry about things like death or losing someone they love. I began to smile for no reason but that smile that was planted on my face soon began to fade away, I gasped for air and all of the sudden it happened.
Boom!
People started to scream in terror, some of the EMT's ignored my parents and rushed away from the burning car. Pieces of metal flew everywhere, people shouted to get to safety. The two EMT's who were pushing me to the ambulance stopped to stare, and so did myself. My eyes widened from shock. There was our car. My father and mother, in flames, burning helplessly. Tears started to pour down my face as I screamed their names. I tried to pull myself up, but they held me down, telling me that there was nothing I could do, nothing to bring them back to my grasp. My tears turned into sobs and I couldn't control all the pain that was building up in my little heart.
"Mommy! Daddy! Don't leave me!" was all that could escape my mouth before everything around me went pitch black.
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I gasped for air, sweat trickled down my forehead as I sat up in my empty room. It was just a dream, I thought wiping my tears away from my face. I was only nine when the incident happened, and now I'm sitting here on the floor, eight years later. Having the same dream over and over almost every day kills me little by little, slowly. At that time during the accident I decided that I would never love a person because that would only bring me pain once again just like that time, but at times I think, how would it feel to have that warm feeling towards a person? Would I be happy or would I be sad?
"People believe that they are born with an invisible red string tied to their pinky finger. The end of that string is tied to the person one is destined to be with, but with complication of external push and pull, it's difficult to get to the end. The people who are tied together are entangled by the string and as it gets untangled, without knowing, we get to meet our fate."
This one little quote crossed my mind so many times making me wonder; if I did let someone come to my empty heart, would his red string be linked to mine?