ELISE
I met him behind the strip club. He wrapped his hands around my waist as we kissed, tugging on the waist of my skirt. I ruffled his hair, the brown locks falling back against his scalp. He mumbled something under his breath as he paused from kissing my lips, before diving back in. His red lips felt sweet under mine.
He smirked as he pulled away, wiping the red lipstick from his cheeks.
"How do I pay you?" He smiles, fishing into his pocket for his wallet.
"You don't. This was my choice, I'm not working." I wipe at my mouth, stumbling out into the car park. He begins to call out for me, but I choose to ignore him. My job is tedious, but sometimes it pays well. He was just a passing fling, and when I finished work, we met up for fun. I enjoyed it, but...I don't know. Something about this past week is a plague to my soul. I can't tell you that I feel okay, because in all reality, I don't. I'm drunk, I'm tired, these bags under my eyes aren't dissipating, and being a hooker isn't exactly a treasured career, as my dictator father continuously hurls in my face. People think I'm just some trampled whore, but I haven't always wanted to be here. I wanted a life, but when your father catches you in bed with his friend from work, there are only so many options left to a girl with nothing but the clothes on her skin. All I had before then was my father, but now I have no one. Not even a single friend.
So, I was forced onto the streets and I've been here ever since, weaving myself through the bustling nights and the seas of eager men. Losing everyone makes you see the world clearly, because there isn't anyone to lean on. Nobody is there, at all, and the world spins around you, and you're afraid. I wasn't even an adult yet. I stayed with my grandparents until I was an adult myself, and then I was on my own. Earning money the only way I knew how, by selling myself. I learned the hard way how life can treat you, because now I have no one. My grandparents only let me see them once in a while, mostly on my father's request, and my mother is gone. I have no one to lean on.
Leaning on my car door, I picked a cigarette from my pocket, lighting the end. The trail of smoke left my body as the misty autumn air whisked around my body. The simplicity of the current state was enough to bring my emotions to a steady state. I don't need to cry right now. I don't need to scream at myself, the pain I'm inflicting burning inside. The atmosphere is practically perfect. Practically.
Someone interrupted me, their harsh voice waking me from the daydreaming. "Hey, I need a favour." He spoke, stretching out his feet and smiling. He stood tall, moving closer towards me.
"What do you want, Brady?" He sighed as I spoke, lifting my head to see him. His hair was messy, and he had a scar on his left arm. He didn't look too comfortable. He began to distance himself, stepping further backward and staring around, afraid of someone. Or something. He cleared his throat, rubbing his Adam's apple slightly.
"I need your help, Elise. I messed up." He murmured, stepping forward once more. He scratched his scalp, running his rough fingers through his dirty brown hair. He scratched his eye, moving further beside me. Whatever he's done, why does he think I can help him?
"What did you do? I won't help unless you tell me." I breathed, before taking another smoke of the cigarette. He sighs, stepping further towards me. His face is mere inches away from mine. He frowns, shaking his head slowly.
"Elise, I nearly killed someone. Help me." He stopped, frowning. I stared up into his eyes, the shock in his eyes. He's not lying. He did nearly kill someone. What does he think a stripper can do to help him?
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ONE WEEK EARLIER
He stopped staring towards the ground and looked up, the creases in his frown forming. "I don't know why it keeps happening...I'm not letting it. I want to be happier, I promise to that." He lifted his head, glancing over towards me. His eyes met mine as he spoke the next line. "I don't want to hurt people. I couldn't see myself as what could be happening to me." He glanced over to the leader of the group, his frown beginning to melt away with his thoughts. I can't think of what he's going through, but it must be horrible. The past two sessions he's talked about not wanting to hurt someone, not wanting to be miserable and grey. All of the sudden he thinks he'll be a killer.
The group counsellor stopped in his movements and looked towards him only, his own frown forming. "Thank you, Brady. Thank you for sharing with us." For once, he lifted his head to smile, but it soon faded away, and he was left there, the frown seeping over his face. The leader turned towards me, his head lifting as he looked me head to toe. Most days, I'd show up in a short dress and heels, but today was an exception. It was my mother's anniversary, so I thought I'd remember her. When I was younger, she told me how she'd love to see me get married one day, and she'd smile every time I'd mention wedding dresses. Her and father never had much of a big white wedding, it was always meant to be a small ceremony for them, she'd claim. She wanted mine to be spectacular, so in tribute, I wore a black dress that reached just below my knees. She will always be in my heart.
He nodded towards me, awaiting a reaction. "Hello, my name Elise Bennigan, and...and today, today is the anniversary of my mother's death. They say...they say that when you lose someone.... your whole world...changes. Mine has. It's...it's hard for me to forget... forget her, but I'm surviving, so that's what matters, right? I'm living my life with her...with her in my heart, by my side. I know this place is for recovery, and...and I'm ready to recover, but...but I'm finding it hard to forget what I'm becoming without her." I pause, staring over towards Brady. He sat, listening intently, the frown glued to his cheeks. "I decided to dress nicely for today's meeting, not because you all wanted me to, but because she would have liked me to. My mother...she would have loved seeing my life...span out, but that won't happen." The group leader focused in, tilting his head.
"You can always change, Elise." He spoke, his calming voice carrying throughout the room. He picked up his pen and wrote silently in his notepad.
"No. No, I can't. I'm only forced to be a stripper." The room was filled with silence, my sudden outbreak leaving the others frozen and motionless. "I'm so sorry." The room was filled with a mutter of words as I slumped back in my chair, stunned. I had made a mistake coming here on her anniversary.
"Can I talk to you at the end, Elise?" The leader spoke, turning his head towards mine. I nodded simply, hoping someone else would soon speak and the room would forget about me. Am I forced to be a stripper my whole life? Will I be sleeping around when I'm forty? My life is struggling to keep up with the constant threat of losing out. A girl I hadn't seen before stood up, nodding her head towards the counsellor. She smiled, straightening out her light blue mini skirt. She flattened out her feet on the wood flooring, facing forward.
"Hi. My name is Faith." She spoke, her angelic voice whispered throughout the small room. She combed her chestnut brown hair back with her delicate fingers, and she drifted her gaze towards mine, smiling for a second towards me, before focusing her attention on the wider circle. "I'm lying to my best friend. It's plain for me to realise. For the past year, I've kept her in the dark about everything." She caught my gaze and smiled. "You must be wondering why I'm here, why I want to recover. I want to get over the lies, because I know better. I shouldn't be keeping this up." She frowned, pursing her lips. "I can't tell you what I've lied about." She mumbles, barely audible.
The leader sat forward, leaning his head into the conversation. She was free from the suffering I felt, I could see it. She hasn't lost someone she cared so much for. She hasn't been pushed away, or at least not that I can tell. She, however, has someone to lean on. Whatever she's done to her friend, she needs to work it out, because having someone with you is enough to keep you from falling into the pressures of loneliness. She sat down, comforting herself on the chair after she had finished speaking. The group leader nodded. The session continued.
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The session soon ended, and I was walking towards my car when he stopped me. "Elise, we needed to chat." His soft voice filled my ears as he pulled me around, stopping me in my tracks. "Can you tell me why you decided to blurt all of that out to us today in our session?" I froze, watching eyes dart around mine. I had been a fool to scream at this session, especially when I knew she would rather see my happy and free. I can't help it that I'm tied down to the same job while I'm free to change anything else in my life. This is how it will be.
"Yeah? I know I was upset, I know what I did was wrong, but can you blame me for all of this? When my father caught me....well, anyway, he threw me out onto the streets and left me alone. I don't have anyone to be with." I sighed, taking a cigarette from my pocket. He moved his hand into his own pocket, taking his phone out and smirking.
"You might not think you have anyone, but if you look around you, everyone that was here today will support you. Here," he replies, tapping into the small phone, "I want you to stay at my house. If you ever need a roof over your head, I have a spare room."
I smiled, as he passed the phone towards me. "Thank you. Last week, my only close friend kicked me out of their apartment. They left me with nothing, so this means a lot." He smiled, nodding towards the phone. I have no clue whose number this is. Seeing my confusion, he shook his head and began to speak.
"Oh, right. That's a career counsellor I know by the name of Annalise Putling. I know you said you don't think you could ever find another job, but she'll help, I promise. As long as you are willing to commit." He shook my hand, taking back the phone after I scribbled the number onto a small slip of paper. "Have a nice day, Elise." He smiled, he bright blue eyes flashing back towards mine. He ruffled his hair slightly, and I could say he was definitely attractive. Am I attracted to him? Oh god, the thought makes me weak in the knees. I can't fall in love, because I'm only destined for heartbreak. That's the one thing my father gifted to me.
Am I ready to move on? Do I have the strength to be more than an idling stripper with a list for sex? I don't know anymore, these thoughts rushing through my head. The strength to keep moving is numbing and disappearing each day.
I walk back towards my car, the smoke wafting into the open air. Suddenly, I see her, her brown hair now parted into a small bun, her light blue skirt dancing in the wind. She smiles when our eyes meet, and without words, I feel myself drawn towards her like a small bug to the light. Something between us drags my feet closer to her, edging each step I get.
"Hey there. It's Elise, right?" I nod, and she grins, her rosy red cheeks even brighter. She notices my cigarette as I lean against her car, and her bubbly smile disappears into a frown. "That'll get you killed." She turns her head towards the small trail of grey smoke, sighing.
"So will lying to your best friend." Her frown forms once more, and I can tell she's upset. Whatever she's done, there's ways to fix it. I'm positive. "You can make it up to her, I promise. She'll be supportive if you are."
"I know, it's just...uh, I'm so sorry for all of it. You know, if I had asked myself a year ago where I'd be, I wouldn't be thinking of some car park with a stranger, no offence. I'd want to be happy with...with her by my side." She smiled, reapplying her lip gloss. "Lying wasn't right. It never is, but I only thought the truth would hurt her." She sighs, turning her head towards mine. "Tell me what to do."
I want to help her, I truly do, but the thoughts rushing through my head aren't stopping. I want to make my life important, not just be some stripper paid for the night. I know I'm not stupid. "Faith, was it? You need to just let it all out. If she's a true friend, she won't leave you. She'll stay. She'll stay because she knows you're apologizing."
She smiles, nodding her head. "How do you know she won't hate me for all of the? That she won't see through the skin and call me out. That she won't complain that I did lie."
"It happened to me, too. When I was in high school, I had a close friend, Danielle. We were so close, but she went behind my back and lied to my face. I only forgave her because I knew she was sorry, and she truly was."
"Where is she now?" She smiled, turning her head back to face mine. I turned mine around, and I could see in her eyes how much she wanted to change. I don't know where Danielle is now. It doesn't matter, because even though I forgave her, we weren't destined for forever. When we graduated, we said goodbye and acted like the world had separated us and we weren't meant to know one another. I accepted it only because it didn't matter
"That doesn't matter. What does is that you let her forgive you." I dig my hands into my pocket and fiddle with the piece of paper. "She deserves a chance, and so do you." She smiles, moving closer towards me. She presses her hand on mine, the cold touch hitting my warm hands. Her lips move closer to mine, and she kisses me, only for a moment. Her chilling touch tingles my spine.
"That's for the advice. Here's some for you." She spoke, stroking my palm. "Enough with the smoking." She whispered, stepping away from me and waking towards the driver's side of her car. She smiles, glancing back up towards me as she clicked open the door. "I'll see you around, Elise."
"You too, Faith." I watched her disappear as she drove away. She left me alone in the car park, as I twirled the small slip of paper for the counsellor in my hand. I could only hope she would apologize to her friend. Just hoping that I would see her again.
-----
PRESENT DAY
"Brady, explain it all. Explain to me how you claim to have nearly killed someone." He froze, staring aimlessly towards me.
"I... I don't know. I messed up. One moment she was...fine, the next...her body was lying on the floor, and she was...screaming." He stopped, frozen in fear. Who is he talking about? Does he know her?
"Brady, tell me who she is." My voice became rough and irritated as he looked towards me, frightened and somewhat confused. He stopped his slight shaking to speak once more.
"Uh, she's in hospital now. Her name was...uh, her name is Faith Hyatt." I froze, collapsing to the floor. No, it can't be. One week ago, we met and we kissed and she promised she'd apologize. Now, she's in hospital.
Brady, what have you done?
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THIRD PERSON
He collapsed onto the doubled bed, drawing the sheets closer towards him. The other man, still hovering over him, smiled, moving closer towards him. The two kissed, and while only one of them seemed to enjoy it, both could not deny the chemistry between them. The man's naked body graced the pale white sheets as he moved over the other one, who clutched tightly to the edge of the thin sheet. A slight wind shuffled into the room, the window to the left of the bed left slightly open. The two men collapsed side by side, smiling.
"My wife didn't lie; you are heavenly in bed." He sighed, reaching for something on the bedside table. The other man, Jeremy, smirked, placing his hands on the other's body, stroking his chest.
"This was different." He spoke, continuing to stroke his chest as the other man took a sip of water from glass on his bedside table. Jeremy smiled, moving his hand closer towards the man's lower regions. The other man smirked, his eyes lighting up. Jeremy had a plan to escape the house, all he needed was to move in closer to the so called Hades and commit to this rough sex long enough to knock him out and escape through the slightly opened window. His plan was working, so far. He watched the man beside him smile and nod each time he did something shocking or right. He didn't care much for what he was doing with the man; he had never been into same sex relationships. He wasn't homophobic, just on the opposing side of their relations. Sometimes he'd be in public and he'd watch a gay couple show the slightest touch of affection and he'd feel sick at the sight of it.
He sighed once more as the man moved his head closer to Jeremy's legs. Now would be the perfect time. He reached towards the bedside table beside him for something to knock the ma our, and he found something perfect. A small ornamental duck.
"Now we wouldn't want that, would we?" The door burst open, and she strutted in, holding a small ornamental duck of her own. The two men froze, Jeremy retreating to hide the duck somewhere. The other man ducked his head up and covered himself with the sheet. "Next time you want to knock out my husband, use something that isn't equipped with a camera." She smiled, revealing the gun behind her back. "I wanted to torture you some more, but with you attempts to murder my husband, I see it fit that you die today." She grinned, loading the gun and aiming towards him. He froze, clutching onto the bare sheet as he recalled the fact that he was still naked. He would be dying naked today.
"It's been a pleasure, Jeremy." She spoke, and as she fired the gun, he watched the world around him fade into black. He was dead.