(Long(er) and werid chapter. Also couple swear words near the end.)
*STILL two days after the crash*
Wonwoo's p.o.v.
I don't know where I was going but I just needed to go.
I needed to be away from everyone and everything.
I wanted these memories out of my head.
I sat on my park bench and thoughts of some ways.
I thought of one thing that might work. You see people in moives do it when they want to forget things.
I pull my wallet out of my jacket pocket.
I'm lucky it was in there.
I check to see how much money I have.
I have a bit so it should probably be enough.
I checked to make sure I had my id and I did.
I had everything I needed so I made my way to my destination.
*20ish minutes later*
I stood across the street and looked up at the neon sign.
Was this actually a good idea? Would it actually work?
Guess I'll never know if I don't try it.
I looked up and down the street, waited for a few cars to pass, before I ran across the street and entered the building.
I entered a dimly lit room and looked around.
There were only a few people there, which made sense since it was about 4 o'clock in the afternoon.
I walked up to the counter and sat on one of the stools.
After a few minutes, a man came up to me.
"What can I get you?" He asked.
"Um..."I said unsure of what to get with it being my first time in a place like this.
"First time in a bar?" The man asked, probably guessing because I look young.
"Yeah." I awkwardly laughed and rubbed the back of my neck.
"Could I see your id?" The man asked. "Just to be sure."
"Of course." I said and fished my wallet out of my pocket and passed the man my id.
"Alright." He said and handed it back to me before walking away.
I wait a few minutes before the man comes back and places a dark brown bottle in front of me.
"Beer." He said as he did. "You may think it tastes gross at first but trust me, it gets better the more you drink it."
I nod and he takes a bottle opener and opens the bottle for me.
"Let me know if you want anything else." He says and leaves to tend to another person in the bar.
I look at the bottle a bit nervous to drink it.
I past the thought away.
Here goes nothing.
I pick the bottle up and take a drink of it.
He was right. It does tastes gross. How do people enjoy drinking this stuff?
I decided to take another drink.
I am paying for this after all.
The second time wasn't as bad as the first.
Maybe he was also right about it getting better.
As I continued to drink I thought about how S.coups would react if he knew I was in a bar.
At least I had stopped thinking about my terrible past.
After I finished the drink I figured I should leave so I called the man over I could pay.
"How was that?" He asked when he came over.
"You were right, bad at first but got better." I answered.
"Want another?" He asked.
"No thanks. I should get going." I said and he nodded. "How much?"
He told me how much I had to pay and I payed him and left.
I put my hood up so I wouldn't be seen.
As I walked down the street the memories slowly came back.
Maybe it didn't work.
I looked across the street and noticed a certain store.
Maybe I just needed to drink some more.
I made my way across the street and into the store.
I looked around and soon found the same brand that the man gave my in the bar.
I grabbed a package that had 12 bottles in it and pay for it.
I went to a quiet part of a park that was near the dorms.
There was only one couple sitting on a bench in the area so I just sat behind a tree.
I took out a bottle from the package and as a drank it I looked over and could see a playground that was filled with kids.
They all look so happy. Their lives are so simple. They don't have to worry about anything but the game they are playing.
I sighed and wished I was a kid again.
My life was so easy back then.
I didn't have to worry about people finding out I liked guys. Then when people find out I had to deal with how people acted.
People used to ask me, "Why are you so depressed? You have nothing to be depressed over."
Like, really, you try being mentally, physically, and sexually abused almost everyday day of your life and not get depressed.
A teacher actually asked me that question once, and I just said nothing and left.
I now wish that I had told him what was happening to me so it would have stopped.
I never actually really wanted to be an idol, I just auditioned hoping I could left my house.
I hadn't noticed untill now that I had started crying at some point.
I quickly wipe my tears and look down at my bag to see that I've already drank three bottle.
Oh well.
I grabbed another bottle and looked back at the playground.
It was a bit blurry but I guessed it was just the tears that were still in my eyes.
I don't know how long I sat there drinking but after awhile I got a text from S.coups telling me come back right away.
I sigh and started getting my stuff together.
As I grabbed my bag with the bottles in it, I noticed that there was nine empty bottles.
That means I've drank ten in total.
Damn.
I got up but soon fell against the tree. I felt my head start pounding.
I made it out of the park, only tripping over my own feet once.
I made it onto the crowned sidewalk and stumbled as I walked, actually running into a few people, who just glared at me.
I couldn't really see or hear well so when people would yell at me for running into them and I would just mumble a sorry and keep walking as best I could.
I finally made it back to the dorm and boy do I regret coming back.
"Wonwoo!" S.coups yelled as I stumbled in the door. "Are you ok?"
"I'm fine!" I said and laughed a bit.
Even though I wasn't.
S.coups looked down and noticed the bottle I was still holding in my hand. He grabbed it from.
"Give that back!" I said and reached for it but ended up tripping and hitting S.coups.
"You were drinking?!" S.coups yelled. "Are you drunk?!"
"Maybe." I said and looked at S.coups. "Probably am."
"Ou my god." S.coups said and walked away.
"Can I have it back?" I asked, which was probably stupid.
"Hell no!" S.coups said and continued walking.
I grabbed the last two bottles from my bag and hid them under my jacket that I was still wearing.
I walked into the living and past everyone, heading to the bathroom where I could alone and in peace. My head was still pounding and I didn't want to be lectured right now.
"Where are you going?" S.coups asked as I pasted the living room.
"The bathroom to piss." I said in a sarcastic voice. "Am I not allowed?"
"Just checking." S.coups said. "We need to talk."
"Yeah, whatever." I said and made my way to the bathroom.
I walked in, closed the door, and due to the fact the bathroom is small, I sat in the tub.
I pulled both bottles out of my jacket and set them beside me.
As I was sitting there I could hear S.coups and Mingyu talking.
"Hyung, here's his bag." Mingyu said.
Great, they're going through my stuff.
"Holy crap." S.coups said.
Guess he found all the empty bottles.
"What?" Mingyu questioned.
"There are nine empty bottles here." S.coups said. "Plus the one I took from him makes ten."
There was silence for a minutes.
"Mingyu, beer doesn't come in packages of 10." S.coups said.
I heard footsteps coming close to the bathroom. The door opened and Mingyu stood there.
"Oh go away!" I said threw the half empty bottle that was in my hand at him.
He dodged it and it smashed on my wall of the hallway.
Bad idea because next thing I knew S.coups was standing in front of me.
The bathroom door was closed behind him.
"What is wrong Wonwoo?" S.coups asked in a comforting voice.
I thought he would be mad.
I could take it anymore and broke down crying.
"I can't do it hyung." I cryed. "I just can't."
"Come on." S.coups helped me out of the tub and he sat on the floor of the bathroom, hugging me.
"I tryed to stay strong but I just can't do it anymore! I've done it for so fucking long and by this point I don't give a fuck anymore if people think I'm weak!" I yelled and cryed into S.coups's shoulder.
"You're not weak Wonwoo and I never want you to think you are." S.coups comforted me. "I don't know what happened in your past but I'm sure it was bad and nobody can stay strong and pretend nothing is wrong forever."
I said nothing and just continued to cry on his shoulder.
After a few minutes my stomach started to hurt and I felt extremely sick so I pushed S.coups anyway.
"What's wrong?" S.coups asked but I didn't replay.
I wrapped my arms around my stomach and started rocking back and fourth, hoping to make myself feel better.
S.coups noticed me do this and started rubbed my back.
"You shouldn't hold it in." S.coups said. "You'll feel worse."
I nodded my head and after a few seconds, I started vomiting in the toilet.
"You're going to feel like hell tomorrow." S.coups said and continued rubbing my back.
When I was done S.coups handed me some tissues and I wiped my face and flushed the toilet.
"How many did you drink?" S.coups asked.
"One at the bar, nine in the park, Half of the bottle you took, and half of the bottle I threw at Mingyu." I said.
"Evelen full bottles in total." S.coups sighed. "Where's the last bottle from the box you bought?"
I reached into the bathtub and handed it to him. "I'm sorry."
S.coups said nothing and just poured the liquid down the sink.
"Come on." S.coups said and held a hand out to me. "You should sleep."
I looked at S.coups's feet. "Hyung, I need help." I said and looked up at him. "Professional help."
→→→→→→→→→→→→→→→
I'm not even sure how I came up with this. It just kinda happend.
So Wonwoo admits he has a problem and needs help. Step one complete!
(He's gonna tell Mingyu soon, don't worry.)
I'm trying to get back to proper uploading. I've been really busy this past week but it's all over now and I can started writing again. Yay!
Hope you all enjoy the story!