Again, nothing really to say except, thank you all so much for the support of this story! It means a lot to me! (ha ha that is a song by day to remember- look it up if you have never heard it)
But yeah, we are up too over 9,000 reads which is huge! Thank you guys!
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Louis P.O.V
"Look Lou," He replied. "Something's happened. I think you should come to the hospital and see for yourself." Liam whispered on the other end of the phone.
I froze. I didn't reply; I couldn't. My breath hitched in the back of my throat. I opened my mouth, but no words came out. What could be so horrible that he could not tell me over the phone? Had Harry tried to kill him self? No! He said he wouldn't. He said that he would stop hurting himself- he said that he wanted to live. He want to live because I made his life worth living.
He wanted to live before I hurt him. Before I called him a stupid and pathetic. He wanted to live before I broke him.
I couldn't stay on the phone line anymore. The pain in my heart became more than what I could handle. I hung up and dropped to my knees in shame. Guilt hit me hard. I had hurt him and I ran. I ran because I couldn't look in his eyes and see all the pain that I had caused. I ran because I was a coward.
I had been no better than what had broken him in the first place. In my attempts to try to help him, I had just hurt him even more in the process. He must have done something horrible to end up in the hospital. Maybe he cut right in front of Liam or even over dosed. Or maybe he had tried to jump in front of a car and got hurt. How long had I been gone? An hour? Maybe two?
So much could happen in a hour, but I refused to think that Harry was dead. I cast that thought out of my mind. Liam over exaterated everything. I'm sure it couldn't be that bad.
I took in a deep breath. What happened between us? Harry and I had been like peanut butter and Jelly. We were inseparable. We were best mates. When did that change? When did it change where he had to hide everything from me? When did it change where he couldn't look me in the eyes and tell me the truth; where he couldn't tell me what was really going on inside that head of his.
Maybe he had tried to but I just missed it.
My stomach began to feel queasy and I began to feel nausea. My head hurt and my throat felt dry. I slid down to the ground. After I had said that to Harry, I just ran. I ran as far and as fast as I could. Now, where was I? I was alone, lost, had no friends left, and was left in what looked like an ally way of some sorts in a strange town where I had never been. I began to feel scared.
Is this how Harry felt every night when he would stay up slitting his wrists? Did he feel like no one cared for him? Is this how it feels to be alone?
I shivered at the though. Where was I?
I pulled out my phone to try to find directions or call a cab but the second it flashed on, it flashed shut. It had died.
I buried my head in my hands. Harry- he had been all that I had been thinking of these past few days. He was in my mind 24\7. I wanted him to feel loved. I wanted him to feel like he didn't have to fight his addictions alone. I wanted him to know that he was never alone. But after what I did.....he could never trust me again.
My mind wondered to the phone call. Liam had sounded desperate- almost as if he had been crying right before he talked to me. Something was wrong with Harry- something had happened and I had a feeling in the pit of my stomach that it had been bad. No matter how much I tried to deign it, I knew that something was wrong.
I got up off the ground and dusted myself off. My head hurt from thinking. I need to see Harry. I needed to tell him that I was sorry. I need to make him feel loved.
I began to run in the direction in which I thought that I had come from. I was unsure if I was going any where. I must have been down town because there were buildings surrounding me and the pavement was made of a cherry colored red.
I needed Harry. I had been so stupid to leave him. I had been so stupid to not get him help. I had been so stupid not to notice what had been going on. Or had I really noticed, but I was too naive to understand what it was?
*flashback*
I slam the door to my silver Chevy. Today had been awful. We were suppose to record our final track for our new album, but nothing seemed to work. To begin with, the microphone stopped working half way through Niall's recording session, and nothing could fix it. Someone spilled coffee on the controllers which made them short out, and Harry could barely sing. His voice had been sore and scratchy, and he sounded awful.
We had just come back from our tour in America, and we were suppose to have the new album out in two months. That was definitely not happening thanks to today. It seemed that everyone at the studio was pissed- well, everyone but Harry. Haz just seemed sad and kept apologizing.
"Lou," Harry said jogging up to me the second that I got out of the car, "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to mess up today." His face looked sad and innocent.
I turned around and glared at him. "For God's sake Harry, would you stop apologizing? You are getting so annoying!" I yelled at him. Venom hung off of my words, and I snared.
Harry just looked at his shoes. He just stood there while I began walking towards the house. He looked like he was about to cry or something, so I walked over to him. "Come on love; lets go inside". I said much more calmly to him. I grabbed his sleeve, but he just flinched away, and wrapped his arms around himself.
I begin to walk towards the house the second I see paparazzi arriving. Harry did too. He almost sprints to the door. Questions are spit at us from left to right.
"How's the recording going?"
"How was your tour?"
"Are you glad to be back home?"
The second we run inside the house, the noises stop completely. I sit down on the couch, but Harry just awkwardly stands there.
"Should we order something to eat? I'm famished." I proclaim. "Would you rather have pizza or Chinese takeout?"
Harry awkwardly shifts on his feet. You can tell that he is nervous about something, but I'm not sure what it is. "Um...well..I'm not that hungry." He states.
I give him a werid look and say, "Well Chinese it is."
I take out my phone and order, giving our address and my creit card number to pay for the bill. Then, I hang up. Harry goes to the bathroom while I just sit and wait for our food to come.
After about 15 minutes of staring at the wall, I hear the door bell ring. I get up and take our food, tip the man for delivering it, and thank him. He doesn't seemed too surprised that I, Louis Tomlinson, answer the door which shocks me.
I set the food on the table and notice that Harry still hasn't come out of the bathroom. I knock on the door.
"Harry, are you ready for supper?" I ask.
I hear shuffling on the other side of the door. It sounds like he is trying to put something away. "Yea. I'll be out in a minute."
I nod, and walk away from the door into the kitchen. I get out a movie to watch, and let the commercials play by while I set out our food on the coffee table. By the time that everything is ready, I see Harry come out of the hall. He walks over and sits next to me silently. I don't think anything of his strange behavior other than that he has had a bad day. Everyone has them.
We talk through the movie and eat our chineese. I snarf mine down, but Harry hardly touches his. When I ask him what is wrong he says that he just isn't hungery. I buy it.
It isn't until half way through the movie that I finally notice that something is wrong. "Haz, look. You're bleeding!" I say.
Harry looks instenctivly down to his wrist, and immedately covers it with his other free hand. "Um.....I got hurt. I..I'd b..better go take care of it." He says and runs away to his room.
I just sit there thinking that something is terribly wrong with him from the way that he was acting to now the mysterious blood that coated his sleeve. After a few minutes I decide that I'd better go talk to him.
I see that he is not in the bathroom, so I walk up the stairs to his bed room where the lights are turned off except for a single lamp. I notice that Harry has fallen asleep writing something in his journal. Almost every time that something special or exciting happens, he writes it down in his book, and when ever he is feeling down, he always reads those special memories to make him happy again. I smile at his sleeping face, and lean down to kiss his cheek. He looks so adorable as he sleeps.
I turn off the light and whisper goodnight before I close the door.
I decide that I will talk to him in the morning about what had happened tonight. He will probably feel better then.
The thing was, when I woke up the next morning, not one word of the nights events entered my mind.
*end flash back*
The signs had all been there. They had been there all along. It all made since now. The blood on his sleeve, him not eating, him being so depressed- I had noticed but yet I hadn't paid any attention to him.
Maybe he had wanted someone to notice that he needed help all along. Was he silently calling for help, and no one had heard.
I ran harder. People were looking and me weirdly, pointing, and staring. Photos were being taken.
I didn't look back. The only thing that was on my mind was Harry.
Could I save him, or was it too late? Only Liam knew that answer.
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So..................Louis thinks that he can save the day. Can he?
I know that many of you were not pleased about Harry dying, but all I am going to say is that you just need to keep on reading because surprises are yet to come. :)
Yep, so I am going to be gone all this week, but I will try to get an update in anyway.
Rate, comment, and vote below :)
Thanks for reading my little skittles