Listen to the song :)
Abrielle woke up to the sound of Shawn knocking on the pool house door before he let himself in.
"I'm sorry. You sleep," he realized. "I'll come back later."
She stretched and sat up, wiping her eyes. "What do you want?" she wondered. He shook his head, going back outside.
Abrielle got out of bed and padded to the bathroom to relieve her bladder. She could hear Shawn outside playing with Sapphire.
She showered and brushed her teeth, combing her hair before brushing it into a ponytail. She pulled on sneakers and went outside to see what Shawn wanted.
"Good morning, beautiful." He smiled in greeting. "Shayla is here."
"She's here? Really? Are you sure?"
"You'd think I would have a positive ID on the woman I put in my car."
Abrielle went into the house and saw Shayla sitting on the sofa with Evan's head in her lap, stroking his waves. He at least looked less tortured.
Shayla looked up at Abrielle with intelligent eyes and motioned her over. Abrielle couldn't help wondering if her sister-in-law knew something she didn't.
Evan sat up and Shayla got up to hug her sister-in-law. "How is my nephew doing?"
"Good. Nurse Carla said I'm putting on a good amount of weight and the swimming is good exercise. I've been trying to stay in good spirits. She says my moods can affect the baby."
"Oh. Yeah. I'm sorry about your dad, honey."
"Thanks. Um, I'll go make breakfast."
"Nope. We're going out. Shawn was just waiting on you."
"Oh. He's playing with the dog."
Shayla chuckled. Shawn had come in the house about a minute ago. In fact, he was upstairs.
"You need sharper hearing. He just went upstairs."
Abrielle went to look in the backyard, and sure enough, Shawn wasn't there and the dog was in her heated dog house.
"Hey, Shayla. Can we speak in private a minute?"
Shayla followed Abrielle outside, and Abrielle looked around like she expected Shawn or Evan to see them and start listening in.
"How come you talked less to Evan when he came to see you?"
"Oh, honey. You have to understand that my brother was out of the country. Looking for people who wanted to kill him. I talk to my son when I don't have to worry about his uncle. And look, I'm home now."
"I'm happy you're home."
Shayla just smiled and headed into the house. Shawn and Evan were about ready to go. Shawn put his arm around Abrielle and she didn't feel the need to shrug him off. She did, however, reject his kiss.
"It's been a day, Shawn."
He sighed as they got in the car and headed out to have breakfast.
Shayla kept her eyes on her son for a moment. She could tell he hadn't been sleeping. It was why she let her brother check her out of the hospital. She knew enough for now. And being home gave her time to decide what she would do with what she knew.
Even at home, she only spoke when she absolutely had to. And for Shayla to use a normal tone of voice was like she was shouting. It had always been that way ever since the first time that she legitimately checked into the mental hospital when she was nineteen. Sometimes, she did still have nightmares. But with time came healing.
Shawn made conversation with his wife. Now, when he feared losing her, he really was sorry.
Abrielle could see him trying to try. But he hadn't successfully been trying.
Shawn's way of apologizing, sadly, was through gifts. Abrielle tried explaining that it didn't matter what he gave her; she wanted to be respected, not to be covered in jewels. She thought that now, he might be actually putting himself on the right track.
Breakfast was mostly a quiet affair. Shayla and Evan both stayed silent; Shawn mostly made small talk with Abrielle that brought an awkwardness that had never been felt with the two. Even when he had kidnapped her.
After breakfast, they went back home, and Shawn took Evan outside. Abrielle went to play with Sapphire. And Shayla took the opportunity to go root through Evan's things.
She found his journals and she could see why he wasn't sleeping. He was getting premonition-like dreams. She looked at the illustrations and read what had been happening in his dreams.
My mom sits down to have her breakfast sitting in her window to look out at the creek. She begins to feel lethargic from the tranquilizer they put in her food.
The dosage is not deadly, but it's enough to weaken her. When the doctors hear her fork fall, they troop into the room, taking her by her hands and feet, tossing her roughly into her bed and wrapping her in the sheets like a corpse before they sneak her out of the hospital and toss her into the back of a pedo-van.
It's dark and she's doing her best to fight the lethargic feeling-
"What are you doing?" Evan asked, coming into the room, snatching the journal out of his mother's hands, feeling that she was already fragile enough.
Shayla just hugged her son, kissing his head. "I'm fine, son," she whispered.
"Now you're fine. You weren't fine before."
She held him to her, rubbing his back. Her poor baby. She knew he was close to breaking, and her Evan was never particularly fragile. But always a Mama's boy, worried about his mama.
"Don't touch anything else that doesn't belong to you, Ma," he told her sternly. She just nodded. But she would be right back looking through them later.
Meanwhile, Abrielle and Shawn were in the pool house with Sapphire. Abrielle had dressed her in a cute little Wonder Woman outfit in honor of Halloween. She had a ton of costumes for her to wear, leading up to the actual day.
"Bri?"
"Yes?"
"I was thinking. Actually thinking. If all I have to do to get you to stay with me is be faithful, then that's okay. Because if you not here, with me, then I' be real fucked in the head. Khadija don't mean nothing to me. Nobody else mean nothing to me. But you do. You matter."
Shawn had been honestly thinking about what he did wrong. He should have told Khadija that the reason he hadn't checked on her in four months was because he loved his wife and that was what was keeping him distracted.
He knew he was wrong from jump. But he was so used to having his way that he thought Abrielle would bend to his will like everyone else. But she hadn't. He had thought for a moment that he could keep up relations with both women. By no means was he in love with Khadija. But he felt a sort of sense of obligation to her. To keep her.
"And I realized why you didn't just let it go. You right. You deserve me to treat you the way I want you to treat me. And I don't want to ever think of no other man touching you. You didn't get married to the world, you married me. I want the chance to be a family. The chance to give our baby what I didn't have. And if we have to take it slow, I'll do that. I'll work my way back in because you're worth that to me. I never felt about no one else the way I feel about you. You make me want to be careful. You make me want to protect you and lay with you and hold you close to me at night. I used to sleep alone every single night. And now I hate it. I hate knowing that when I wake up, it's not going to be to your head on my chest and your hair all over everywhere."
That put a slight smile on her face, knowing that Shawn missed her too. Hearing him tell her how wrong he was. It softened her up like butter. But no one could deny her vulnerability at the time either.
"I want you to come back in the house, and I want us to share a bed again. I need you, Abrielle. I need you because I love you. And I promise, I'll do my damnedest not to fuck up again."
She put her arms around him, laying her head on his shoulder. That was all she needed.
He heard her sniffling and lifted her chin. "Why are you crying?"
"I'm. Always crying. I'm just. A. Big ball. Of tears!"
He rubbed her back, letting her cry on him. No one, not even his sister, had been allowed to cry on him before. But Bri was his everything.
"I really am sorry, Bri. I know I can't treat you like you mean less to me than what you mean to me."
He kissed her softly, wiping her tears. She managed a little smile. That was the first kiss they'd shared in a month.
"We're going to get your mom out here," he told her.
She just nodded. She hadn't mentioned it, but she didn't want her mother out there alone. Her brothers had to go back to their active duty.
"We have to get her today," he clarified. Abrielle nodded her understanding.
"So listen, your mom can stay out here, in the pool house, or she can stay in the main house."
"I'll just leave that up to her."
Shawn helped Abrielle up, his hand on her back, soothing her. When they got to the house, her mother was sitting on the sofa, staring at a wedding picture. She had lost the love of her life. The man with whom she had built a life with that had included a home and three children. Abrielle always knew her parents shared a love that was very real.
She sat beside her mother and took her hand. "Mami, listen. You're coming to stay with us."
Erma shook her head no, whispering in Spanish that she wanted to stay. Abrielle hugged her. It wouldn't be safe to stay.
"I can't lose you too, Mami. Just come stay with us. I need you to be there when I have the baby. Yes?"
"Okay," Erma whispered, her frail hand over her daughter's.
"What do you want to take? The wedding pictures, yes?" Abrielle asked. Erma nodded. "Do you want Papi's Navy uniform?" she asked her mother.
Erma only nodded. Abrielle looked up at Shawn, and he shook his head slightly for a moment. "Look, Ms. Chavez, you only need to take what is absolutely important at the moment. I can come back and pack up your other things later. Okay?"
Erma nodded, and Abrielle whispered in Spanish for her to go start packing up the important things and just mark what she wanted Shawn to take later. Erma got up and left the room.
Shawn looked at his wife then. "You too, Abrielle. I know you don't have all your stuff. So go get the rest of what you want. Or mark it."
Abrielle did as she was told, walking up the stairs into her room, immediately enveloped in a cloud of memories. She stood there a moment, remembering slumber parties with her friends, all the junk food and giggling. She remembered having very important and serious, totally embarrassing talks with her mother about puberty. She remembered when her daddy would come and sit in here and tell her about his time spent traveling the world in the Navy. Showing her pictures of his old Navy buddies and telling her about his job aboard the ship.
She went in the closet and pulled out a big keepsake box that she had in the back of yearbooks and photo albums. It had her prom and graduation DVDs in it. Every captured memory, she had in this box. Letters from her brothers while they were in the Air Force. She found the box with her quinceañera paraphernalia in it.
Reminding herself that she could look at these things when she got home, she started to lift the box and jumped a little to hear Shawn telling her, "I got it, don't worry about it."
He picked up the two boxes and she watched him as he took the boxes out to the trunk. He had her mother wait inside with her while he took the things out to the car. He could see from the car if someone went inside. But he couldn't see from inside of someone went to the car. She was safer in the house waiting.
When they had all the things that they were taking immediately, Shawn escorted both women out to the car and started for home.
Abrielle started speaking Spanish to her mother in a rapid pace and low tone, and Shawn wondered what they were discussing. He had caught the words, "La casa de la piscina," and he was sure that casa was house. So he knew then that they were discussing his mother's living arrangements.
Erma thought about it for a little while. She loved her daughter dearly, but she wanted the alone space. So she chose the pool house.
"She doesn't want to stay in the main house," Abrielle told Shawn.
"Alright."
When they got to the house, Shawn got Erma's things and showed her to the pool house, leaving mother and daughter alone. Abrielle showed her mother where everything was, including fresh linens and the panic room.
Abrielle helped her mother unpack her things and put them away, and then Erma asked to be left alone. So Abrielle left and went outside, where Sapphire immediately came running over, whining and pawing at her face. Abrielle picked the puppy up and nuzzled her.
Shawn stood in the doorway watching his wife and her dog. She didn't have to thank him. He knew she loved that dog now. It was evident. She didn't have to say it.
Sapphire licked Abrielle's face as she started for the house, finally noticing Shawn standing there.
"That never ceases to put a little fright in me," she told him.
"You should never have a reason to be afraid in your home. Especially when you have the knowledge that no one in it will hurt you."
She just nodded, and he followed her into the house as she made her way to the front room. He sat in the arm chair, watching her as she sat on the sofa, playing with Sapphire. The puppy clearly adored her human, playfully barking and jumping up and down, even managing to stand on her hind legs.
It was so good to see Abrielle smiling. It was his equivalent to the sun. He knew that he was too invested in her to ignore what she had told him. He didn't want to lose her. He wanted her right where he could always see her. In his line of vision.
Abrielle looked up and saw Shawn watching her, and she smiled at him a little bit. She loved him. But she loved herself more.
When Sapphire got tired of playing, she hopped up on a chair, pawed around in little circles, made herself comfortable, and laid down. Abrielle held her hand out for Shawn, and immediately the warmth of his fingers was soothing her skin.
Shawn took her into his arms and just held her for a moment, just standing there, holding her close to him, kissing her head.
They stood there for at least five minutes, her head on his chest, not saying a single word. Abrielle hadn't heard Shayla come down. But Shawn just didn't bother moving.
"I'll make lunch," Shayla announced, making Abrielle jump a little bit.
"Alright," Shawn told her, looking down at Abrielle as his sister moved along. "I told you that you shouldn't be afraid in your own home. Stop that jumping."
She only nodded, and he took her hand, leading her up to the bedroom they shared. He closed and locked the door before he took her to sit down.
"I know you not completely done being mad at me, Abrielle. But I just want you to know, I love you. I know I need you. I want us to be a family. And whatever I gotta do to keep you with me, I'll do it in a heartbeat. Don't nothing matter more to me than knowing that we can do this right," he told her. "I respect you. I know I fucked up."
Abrielle stood there a moment. How many times had he apologized today alone? Most people would read too deeply into it, but she read it just the way his sincerity made it: as him wanting to make it work and putting the effort into keeping his wife with him.
"I appreciate that," she told him softly, stroking his face, his beard rubbing against her palm. "All that I want from you is simple. I just want to receive back what I put in. Marriage is a business. What I put into it is my investment. No one likes making bad investments, Shawn. You know that better than anyone."
He nodded and leaned down to kiss her lips. She put her arms around his neck, returning the kiss. She didn't realize how much she had actually missed her husband.
She pulled away and looked up at him. "Today, we can start over. I'll forget that it happened. If you promise to make better efforts in the future."
"I promise to make better efforts in the future," he told her genuinely.
She stepped on her tippy toes to kiss him, pulling his face closer to her. He put his hand on her rounding belly, feeling where their unborn grew. He was still rooting for a little girl. He wanted her to look just like her mother and be smart and funny like her.
"I love you," she whispered against his lips.
"I love you too."
"Now, go get my shit from the pool house," she told him, pulling away, smiling wide, going to plop down on the bed. Shawn couldn't help shaking his head as he chuckled and went to do as he was told.