I unlock the main door to Maura's house and walk in to see a familiar pair of shoes. These looked like Niall's shoes but obviously, it could be anyone's since not only Niall wears them. I ignore the thought of Niall and walk in to see Maura sitting on the couch with the television loud while sipping on her tea.
She looks at me and smiles and I do the same. I walk pass her and into my room to find Niall sitting on the bed. Um? What is he doing here? I was sure that it was Niall because of the hair and the rusty colored sweater he wore. His back was facing me and I cleared my throat. "Niall? What are you doing here?" I ask, surprised.
"I came here to bake cookies since my oven at home wasn't working. What about you?" He rolls his eyes and I let out a fake laugh. I honestly don't feel like smiling right now because of everything that has been going on in my mind for the past few days. I just want to sleep right now and not wake up for ten years and so. "I have to tell you something." He says.
And suddenly, every single bad thing is roaming in my mind like how bees roam around honey. Is he going to tell me that he doesn't need me anymore? Does he not love me anymore? Maybe now that he has Eleanor, he doesn't want me? I wonder what does he want to say. I look at him questioningly, horrified of what he is going to say.
"The tour starts tomorrow." He blurts out and I feel my heart calm down at his words. Tour. Tomorrow. He isn't leaving me, he's leaving for tour. "I came here to see you one last time before I go. Are you okay with that?"
"One last time? When are you coming back?" I ask. I'm on the verge of tears. I don't want him to go.
"I'll be back in two months." He hugs me and I hug him back, tighter than usual. I wanted to ask him about Eleanor and him but I decided against it. I shouldn't ruin the moment by asking him about this now if not he'll be hurt and I can't afford that. "Are you okay?"
"Y-yeah." I speak but the throat hurt from trying to stop the tears so I let them go. I can't tell him that I don't want him to go. That will just make him stay and miss his work and I can't let that happen. I can't let him risk his career for me.
"Please don't cry, babe." He kisses my forehead and wipes my tears. "I'm here to take you on a date. Do you want to go?" He smiles
"Of course." I kiss him on the lips. Finally having them on mine feels good. It makes me feel like he's only mine and no one else's. We pull away and he grabs my hand and walk out of the room. In five minutes, we're out of the door and currently in his car. "Where are we going?" I ask, smiling for the first time in a day. I was too stressed out to even think about smiling at anything.
"You'll see." He winks and I sigh in annoyance. Sometimes I love surprise, sometimes I hate it. Right now, I hate it because if he's taking me to a fancy ass restaurant, I'm definitely not ready for it since all I'm wearing is a faded blue skinny jeans and grey top with brown boots... not even heels. What was I thinking? "Don't worry, we're not going to a restaurant." He laughs softly and I raise an eyebrow. "Even if we are, you look great."
"I don't"
In a few minutes, we arrive in front of my old house, where my mother and I used to live in. Why are we even here? I'd rather go to a restaurant than be here right now. This brings back all the memories I've had with mother and father and this makes me feel terrible thinking that I lost both of them in just in my teen years. "I don't want to be here, Niall. I don't want to go inside."
"We're not going inside." He frowns. We get out of the car and he pulls me towards the tree house. We climb up and I see several bags of food sitting on the wooden board. There were two pillows and blankets, placed neatly beside and I smile. So this is our date. "Do you like it? It's your favorite... Well, our favorite." He rolls his eyes and I smile even wider just thinking about eating our favorite food and just having conversations without anyone around us. It felt good to know that he thought of doing this before he leaves.
"Yes! I love it!" I pull him in and kiss him hard on the lips, kind of my own way of thanking him for this. In no time, we dug into our food, stuffing our faces. I didn't know that I was this hungry until I saw food. Niall's phone starts ringing and his expression changes in seconds. It went from happy and giggly to complete silence and worry. He cuts the call and goes back to eating.
The second time, his phone rang again, making him jump and anger written all over his face. He cuts it again and I could see him forcefully pressing the top button on his phone. "If it's important, you should take it." I say and he looks up at me.
"What?"
"The call. Don't cut it."
"It isn't that important." He laughs. More like fakes a laugh because it's clearly visible.
"Then why do you look worried? Is everything alright?" I ask, putting down the box of food.
"Yeah it is, why?"
"Um... because you look worried?" I say again. He sounds like he isn't paying much attention to this conversation so I decided to drop it. "Hey, if there is anything you want to tell me or you wish like sharing, you can tell me okay?" I assure him, smiling. I intertwine our fingers and he kisses my knuckles, signaling me that he appreciates it.
As soon as we were done eating, Niall gathers the leftovers into a box and places it outside so we'd have more space to sit and lay down. The tree house was surprisingly clean with not much papers and boxes around, enough space for us to just have an amazing conversation.
The sky was getting dark and it was almost nine in the evening. The rain has stopped but I could hear little droplets hitting the tree house roof. It is rather soothing. It wasn't hot, it was warm and I am with my most favorite person in the world. It was perfect. The time was perfect.
"Can I ask you something?" He asks, after an eternity of silence.
"Go on."
"Will you come with me on tour?"
"What?"
"Will you come with me on tour?" He repeats. Why is he asking me this all of a sudden? He never had anyone on tour so why now? I don't know what to say. I want to go but at the same time, I can't. I want to stay here and find out the truth. My anxiousness and curiosity is eating me alive. "El?"
"I'm sorry. I can't" I frown. When I was about to tell him half of the truth, something hit me... I have an exam. My midterm exams! Fuck! And I haven't studied shit for it. "I have my exams in two days." Or I don't know in how many days but I need at least a day to get my shit together, fly back to London, study for the exams and figure out the truth.
"I know, Reese told me but..." He stops. So it actually is in two days.
"But?"
"I don't feel close to you, El. I miss you. You were away from me for two days and the moment you left, I started missing you. I don't like being away from you because..." I could see him gulping hard before speaking again. "Because it feels like this will be the last time I see you and then it will all end badly." He frowns.
"Babe..." I hold his hand tight and sit on his lap, hugging him tightly and trying to calm him down. "You're not going to lose me and neither am I going to leave." I assure him, kissing his forehead. His back is leaned towards the pillow, giving his back full support as he holds me. Our bodies touching. We stayed this way for few more minutes until we pulled away.
"I love you." He kisses me, getting me off his lap and slowly pinning me to the ground. He was hovering above me, still kissing me as our lips move in sync. "I love you so much." He says, stopping for a second then continuing. It was weird that he didn't want me to answer to his 'I love you' because he always does. He stops and moves over to my neck as he slowly sucks onto it, leaving wet kisses on my skin. "You're mine."
"Mhmm."
He sits up and removes both our tops and I smile, running my hands on his bare body. I get on my knees and slightly push him backwards so now he's below me. I could feel him fidgeting with my bra and I laugh at his struggle. He finally unhooks it, smirking at me and I roll my eyes. I plant a kiss on his forehead, moving over to his cheeks and then lips as his hands cups my breasts.
Before I unzip his jeans, I look him in the eyes and kiss him one last time until I saw a white piece of paper shining under the moonlight. It was hidden under the wood board but I could still see it from a distance since it wasn't too far away from me. What on earth is that? Maybe what I am looking for could be somewhere around here! But... it's impossible because in the diary, Eleanor wrote that it's in her home. Home. Whatever it is, I have to check this tree house when Niall is asleep.
"What's wrong?" He asks and I shake my head, pecking him on the lips. My concentration isn't on him anymore and I feel bad about it. My whole mind is towards those medical reports and Eleanor. "You alright?"
"Yeah." I fake a yawn.
"Are you tired?" He asks and I nod. I feel terrible for faking everything. I wish I could tell him the truth but I can't. Not right now at least. "We can talk till you sleep." He smiles. His smile is sincere. I can know that he isn't feeling bad.
By the time it was pitch dark outside with only street lights on and no more car horns and such, I knew that it was the middle of the night. I look at Niall and he's fast asleep which means I can quietly find out where the reports are... or if they're even here.
I get out of the blanket and move a little closer to where I saw the paper. The wooden board was on top of the paper so I quietly moved it to the side and pulled the papers out. They were a set of papers but I didn't know what they were for. I could figure out that there were words on it but I didn't know what. I slightly moved myself towards the rays of the moonlight and saw the exact hospital name printed on the center of the paper.
Green Fields Mental Hospital
As I was about to start reading, I felt movements coming from behind, indicating that Niall was about to wake up and I immediately shove those papers into my bag and quietly slept beside him. Our naked bodies touching as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer.
I finally have those papers and tomorrow will be the day I find out what was wrong with her so I can at least get a step closer to why she killed my mother.
__
I woke up to car horns and plastic bags moving from the wind. Niall was dressed up in his clothes from last night and I smile at him.
"El? I have to go in fifteen minutes." He speaks and it took me at least few seconds to process this in my head that he has to go today.
"Can't I follow you back to London?" I frown.
"I'm not going back to London." He says and I sit up, staring at him as tears pooled in my eyes.
"What?"
"I'm meeting the boys in Michigan, we have a show tomorrow."
"Oh."
I immediately get dressed and met him outside.
"I'll send you back to the house."
"No! I mean, I'm meeting Mia in half an hour for some work. I'll go home myself." He assure him and he nods. "Are you okay?" I ask, pulling him into a hug.
"I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too. Look, you've done this for two years straight. What happened now?" I ask.
"I don't know. I... I just don't know." Without a word, I kiss him passionately on the lips, not making it seem like this is our last kiss but as passionate as our first kiss. I'm not going to lose him and neither is he going to lose me.
With that, we said our goodbyes and the car drove off.
I walk back up to the tree house to grab the set of papers from my bag but they were gone.
They were fucking gone.
What the fuck?