I place the black beanie my dad bought me yesterday on my bald head. I look in the mirror; I've lost a lot of weight and my face looks skinny and pale. My eyes have dark purpleish rings around them and look empty. I sigh as my reflection sighs back at me. I just wish I didn't look so freaking sick.
My dad drives me to school as I can't drive myself anymore.
"You sure you feel okay?" He glances at me.
"Yeah, I'll be fine. I want to go." I say back, looking at the school as we pull into the parking lot.
"Okay, well... Have a good day." He says, resting a hand on my bony shoulder.
I slowly climb out the car and pick up my seemingly heavy rucksack- although it's hardly got anything in it. Scott greets me as I shut the car door and my dad drives away.
"What're you doing here?" He asks, because I didn't even tell him I was coming.
"I was feeling..." I search for a word to fit my emotions, "... Okay." I settle with. He looks unsure but doesn't fight me on it.
No one's seen me (except those who were at my house the other day) without my hair yet, or looking so ill.
We walk into the school together in silence, which I hate. I just wish he would be normal around me.
"So... What'd you have first period?" asks Scott, desperate to make conversation. I fumble with my timetable.
"Er... Math." I say.
"Okay, and me." He says and we make our way to the classroom.
Eyes are laid on me as I walk in, everyone obviously knowing my hair fell out. I swallow, hard, and gently sit down in my seat.
We have a cover teacher today as our math teacher is on a field trip. She's talking lots although I'm not really listening, until she stands in front of me and begins to speak.
"'Scuse me, young man." She says, tapping her long fingernails on my desk. Immediately, I look up nervously at her beady stare.
"No hats indoors." She says, referring to my beanie. I gulp, and feel my hands become clammy.
Everyone turns around to see what I'm going to say, and watch as the teacher realises she was wrong.
"Um... I-er- have cancer..." I tell her awkwardly, trying to as peak casually.
She looks taken aback, her eyes wide.
"So, er... May I please keep it on now?" I ask, talking poshly, imitating her, "my head gets rather cold." I say, pointing to my head.
She stutters for a moment, unable to get a word out, until she says quickly "Why, yes, of course, I'm sorry." and rushes back to her desk.
Scott winks at me, and I do the same back.
When the bell goes, making me jump, we walk out into the hall.
"That was awesome, bro!" Scott exclaims, talking about the situation with the hat earlier. I laugh.
"Cancer perk." I say, referring to The Fault In Our Stars, a book I read at Lydia's persuasive recommendation. Although the word 'cancer' immediately makes his expression droop.
"Dude, come on, I'm fine." Assure him, weakly hitting his arm. He sighs.
"I know, you're being so strong... It's just, I'm scared. I don't wanna lose you." He says glumly.
"Nice of you to have belief in me that I can beat this." I mutter sarcastically.
"Stiles, I'm being serious," he moans, "I have every bit of faith that you'll beat this, but it's just if, say, the chemo stops working, or the cancer grows. Then what?" He asks, looking me in the eyes.
"Then I'll just have to fight a little harder. And I'm okay with that." I assure him, putting an arm around him.
Suddenly I feel a searing pain in my stomach and double over. Scott immediately grabs me, and holds onto me, his grip tight.
"Stiles? Stiles, you okay?" He asks, his voice loud in my ear.
"Yeah," I reply, clutching onto my stomach.
"Just get me to a toilet!" I plead, and Scott gently rushes me into the bathroom.
I lunge over to the toilet and vomit inside the bowl, coughing. Scott rubs my back in a circular motion, occasionally patting it.
"Here." He says, handing me a tissue to wipe my mouth with.
"Thanks." I groan, cleaning the disgusting mixture off my lips.
"You okay?" He asks, resting a hand on my shoulder.
"Yeah, I'll be fine. It's just the medication- sometimes makes me sick." I say, still knelt on the floor.