Song and Artist: "The Art of Anesthesia" by Saywecanfly
It's sad I'm sorry.
--
Where am I? Why am I here? Am I alone?
The confusing thoughts and questions ran through Johnnie's head like wildfire. He turned his head left and right, trying to see someone he knew in the waiting room. The familiar hospital smell and tiled floor confirmed him that he was indeed in a hospital's waiting room. Looking down, he saw that he was sitting on one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs of a waiting room in the hospital. He put his hand on his head, furrowing his eyebrows.
You know that feeling when you fall asleep sitting up, and then all of a sudden you wake up and open your eyes suddenly, confused of where you are or what you were doing? That's what Johnnie felt, confused and disorientated.
He got up from the seat slowly, stretching his legs. He looked around again, he was definitely in a hospital's waiting room. Why was he here again? Was he waiting for someone and just dosed off? Johnnie looked to his left and saw a nurse behind the check-in desk. He walked towards it whilst rubbing his tired eyes.
"Uh-hum, excuse me ma'am?" He asked politely. The lady kept writing away on her notebook, not acknowledging Johnnie. He raised a brow at how rude she's being.
"I said excuse me?" Johnnie said a little louder. Still, she said nothing and started typing on the computer. Johnnie scrunched up his nose a little, not liking her attitude. She sighed and looked up.
"Yes?" She answered. Johnnie relaxed a little and smiled.
"Yea, do you kno-"
"Thank you, I'm here for my appointment?" A man's voice said, making Johnnie turn his head to the man next to him.
"Yes, you can go right ahead inside." She said politely to him and gave him a sheet of paper. He took it and walked away, leaving Johnnie pretty pissed off.
"Hey, I was here first." Johnnie argued. The nurse continued writing on her note pad, not having a care in the world. Johnnie shook his head and started exiting the waiting room.
"How fucking rude," he sighed and rolled his eyes. Once he stepped outside and onto the hallway, he looked to his sides.
"Which way is the exit?" He thought to himself. He honestly doesn't know this hospital very well. Johnnie saw a couple of men in surgical costumes speed walk down the right part of the hallway. Dusting off his sweater, he walked towards them. Maybe they know the exit out of here.
"Hello! Excuse me?" He called out a little, trying to catch up with them. They were walking pretty fast, but Johnnie just wanted to go home. As soon as he finds the exit out of here, the sooner he can leave.
"Excuse me!" Johnnie called again, aggravated. He just woke up from a nap, of course he's going to be grumpy if everyone was so damn rude. Johnnie started jogging to catch up with them. The surgeons were walking to one of the emergency/operating part of the hospital. They eventually slowed down, making Johnnie slow down as well.
"Finally! Can you guys help me to get to the exit and-" The two men made a turn and opened a door and locked it, making Johnnie extremely angry.
"Oh for fucks sake! Why can't they-" Johnnie looked at the huge window on the wall in front of him, showing the inside of the room.
He stared with wide eyes, was he on drugs? What is he looking at? Who was he looking at?
He blinked a few times before taking a few steps closer to the glass and placing a hand softly on the glass.
He looked at the door and quickly put his hand on the handle and turned it. He didn't care if he was interrupting whatever those surgeons were doing.
He opened the door and walked inside, closing it behind him. The doctors didn't even flinch when he came in. Johnnie took a few steps closer and peered over the crowded doctor's shoulders.
Johnnie saw the patient laying there, the doctors working on the patient in various places. The person was laying on the table, looking up at the ceiling, sputtering out incoherent words quietly. The patient was hooked up on the machines behind him, various needles here and there.
Johnnie saw their face and right away he couldn't speak. He felt frozen in place. He felt his blood run cold and eyes widen. He choked up on his own breath, not understanding what the fuck was going on.
The body on the operating table was him.
"W-what? N...n-o, this can't..." Johnnie backed up a bit, putting both his hands on neither side of his head. He looked up again to see the doctors working on... on him. A surgeon got out of the way, letting Johnnie have a clear view of himself.
He stiffened as he saw himself shaking on the operating table, his eyes closed and his hair a mess. Johnnie looked at his other self's stomach, a heep of blood and his stomach's guts everywhere. The doctors and nurses in the room were doing something to him, the Johnnie in front of him.
"No! N-no, I don't understand, I-I... that's... me?" Johnnie questioned himself. He looked down on his own body and arms, he feels and looks alright. But what about him? That guy, the Johnnie on that operating table, the Johnnie that the doctors are desperately saving? The Johnnie... right in front of him.
"Nurse! Give me the shot!" "We need critical help!" "Pass the scapel to me," "The papers, give me the patients blood levels!" "More blood and IV!" "We're losing him!" The doctors and nurses yelled here and there, running around and about the room.
Johnnie backed up and looked down, putting his fingers through his hair and pulled it.
"This is a dream... This is all a dream..." Johnnie whispered to himself, trying to reassure his sanity. He shut his eyes closed and opened them again. He looked up to still seeing what was there before. He shook his head again.
"Johnnie, wake, the, fuck, up!" Johnnie yelled as he covered his ears, blocking the sounds of the doctors talking and the beeping of the machines. He slapped himself, trying his best to grasp an actual reality.
"Wake up, damn you..." Johnnie whispered in a high pitched voice as he leant against the wall.
He felt so lost. He felt so confused. He feels so scared, what was going on?
This isn't possible. This isn't really... happening, was it? No. It can't be real.
"Get out of the way!" A higher pitched voice shrieked. Johnnie looked up as the doors flew open.
"Johnnie!" The voice screamed in anguish. Johnnie stared at the girl being pulled back.
"Get her out of here!" A nurse yelled.
"Alex, no!" Bryan tugged at her arm as a nurse tugged at her other arm. Alex had tears flowing down her face, her make up a mess and her face and ears red.
"Don't you dare hold me back! My boyfriend is on his damn death bed right now! Let me the fuck go, Bryan!" The way she screamed sounded like her voice would've been gone by now.
"Alex?" Johnnie stood stiff again. He was utterly speechless.
"Come here, now." Kyle's voice spoke angrily. Kyle pushed Bryan and the nurse away as he wrapped his arms around Alex, lifting her out of the room.
"Kyle! Damn you!" Alex held onto the door frame. Johnnie snapped out of his daze.
"Alex! Guys, I'm right here," Johnnie spoke with a quiet and broken voice and started walking towards them.
"Guys, see? I'm right here, you can see me, right?" He whispered with a few tears flowing. Something grabbed his ankle, making him stop in his tracks.
"Wha-?" He turned his head around in a panic, not understanding what's holding him back. His eyes widened as fear consumed him.
The wall wasn't even there anymore. It's just a deep black abyss of nothing but darkness and black. A black coloured shadow was wrapped around his ankle, pulling him in.
"No! No, let go!" Johnnie tried pulling away, but it brought him to the floor. Johnnie dug his fingernails on the tiles of the operation room's floor. He looked up at the doctors and to his friends.
"We're losing him! Hurry up!" The doctor yelled. The beeping of the heart monitor was gradually slowing down. He heard Alex's piercing scream echo throughout the room, making Johnnie stop struggling and instead just watch everything happen with wide eyes.
He felt himself being pulled into the abyss of black easily. Whatever pulled him down here stopped pulling him all the way in, letting Johnnie see the last of what was happening.
Alex stopped struggling as Kyle put her down. She fell to the floor on her knees, her eyes wide and her limbs fell loosely on her sides. A nurse came over to her and took off her blue latex glove, rubbing Alex's shoulder in sympathy. Alex's face slowly scrunched up into a frown, her eyes squinted tight as tears slipped and fell down her face. Her shaky hand slowly brought themselves up to her face, covering her mouth. Kyle stood there shocked, tears slowly falling down his face.
Bryan shook his head and closed his eyes, turning around and away from everyone. He turned back around and then Bryan's face turned very red as he closed his eyes shut again, tears slipping through. Bryan opened his mouth and inhaled deeply, and then screamed loudly as he banged, kicked, punched and scratched at the door and wall violently, swearing in between grasping sobs.
The doctors took off their mouth masks and shook their heads. They moved aside as the heart monitors slowly fall into a red line, a long beep taking over the room. Johnnie saw himself on the table, his own blue eyes stare into the ceiling blankly.
Johnnie's mouth was open a gap as the flat heart beep was the only thing ringing in his own ears. The black slowly came into his vision as he saw everything start to get further and further away from him until the darkness consumed his vision.
--
Johnnie looked out of the window sitting on a wooden chair. It was sunny outside, breezy too. The tall, luscious green grass of the meadow he saw outside rustled from the wind, the only sound Johnnie heard. He just looked outside with his blue eyes, not feeling anything. He couldn't recall why he didn't and why he can't move at all. He always felt tired though. But, nonetheless, it was such a pretty Sunday afternoon. The afternoon sunlight was the only light coming through the window of the empty wooden western-like house.
Johnnie looked to his left, where there was just pure darkness of the house, the only part the sun wasn't hitting. Johnnie looked back to his right, looking out the window again. He liked sitting next to the window. It's always so sunny. The rest of the house is always dark, but it's very nice and relaxing watching the outside. He looked down at his lap, where his hands where resting. He closed his eyes and breathed before looking back out the window.
-
Alex walked up the hill, wrapping her sweater tighter around her waist. The Autumn season's cold air nipped at her skin, making her shiver. But she made it to the top of the hill, catching her breath a bit. She looked down on the ground and then held up the red rose she held between her fingers.
She twirled the flower in her hands, staring at it solemnly. She had her eyes downcast, her heart having a sinking sensation. Her chest tightened as she pursed her lips. She knelt down on one knee and placed the rose nicely on the ground before standing straight again. She smiled sadly and wiped an oncoming tear from her eye.
"Two years. Bryan misses you the most though, but I miss you as much and so does everyone else, and your mother and Margret and your brother, too." She spoke quietly. Her hair rustled from the wind as she stood there, staring.
"The car crash was just... inevitable. I wished it didn't hit you, I wished the car never hit yo-..." She sighed and blinked a few times, containing herself.
"I love you," She said and turned around and walked down the hill, leaving.
The beautiful rose lay in front of the gravestone engraved "Johnnie Guilbert" as the sun set behind the hills of the cemetery.