I lay next to Daisuke's cold body, my head resting on his chest. I felt no comfort in this cold embrace, because there was something missing.
A heartbeat.
I stare up at the falling sky, blinking as the raindrops fall on my face. My world had been slowly piecing itself together. I was going to escape my parents. I was going to live with Daisuke and his family. I was going to be happy. I was going to fall in love with Daisuke, and finally let him take me on a date.
And now my world was being torn apart.
I don't know how long I lay there, not shivering, but slowly growing colder. I held into Daisuke tighter as thunder rumbles overhead.
Already I missed him. I missed his laugh, his sparkling green eyes. I missed the flutters in my stomach I always denied when he came close. I missed catching his eye accidentally and not being able to look away. I missed his long eyelashes that would part so slowly when he awoke. I missed the way the wind tugged at his hair. I missed his idiotic attempts for a kiss or a date.
I missed him.
I lifted my eyes to his face, so small and pale in death. It was so different from when he was alive. When he was alive it was so vibrant and vivacious and full of life and love and now he was empty.
Suddenly I hear shouts, but I can't even bring myself to look up. Even as footsteps surround me, pounding into the earth. I can't bring myself to even respond until someone's hands are on me, pulling me away from Daisuke.
"No!" I shriek, clinging to him, "No!"
"She's alive!"
Immediately there are several more people around me, tugging Daisuke and me apart. I struggle.
The last thing I see before the darkness gripped my mind was Daisuke face, so small and pale in death.
***
There was no moment of blissful ignorance when I woke.
I knew immediately what had happened, why I was in the hospital, and an inhuman cry tore from me.
I ripped at the monitors, ignoring the machines' screeches of protest as I tugged needles from my skin. I tore at my clothing, at my hair, trying to find some way to ease the pain that was all I was. All I had become. Pain.
Doctors rushed in. People were shouting. Ice entered my veins and then I was once again blissfully unaware.
***
When I next awoke the pain still stabbed at me, but I had it under control. It was like trying to contain an atom bomb exploding in my chest. I felt as though I would implode, fall apart, die at any moment. The pain that I was trying to live with was unbearable, and I'd only just become acquainted with it.
A nurse was there.
"Good news!" She said cheerfully when she saw I was awake. How could she be cheerful? How could anyone in the world be happy again? How could everything keep going as though nothing had happened?
"Your Sensei pulled through!"
Mind numbing shock rips through me. Sensei... Was alive?
"He was in a bit of a mess when they found him," she informed me softly. "We weren't sure he would survive. I mean, he'd lost so much blood, he'd been stabbed through the stomach, his internal organs had been virtually destroyed... But somehow we managed to stitch him back together."
"He's... Alive..." I rasp, barely able to get the words out of my dry throat.
The woman hands me a glass of water. "Yes," she smiles. "Your Sensei survived. But... I'm afraid that was the good news."
And now the pain was dragged back to the forefront of my mind. Daisuke, Shun. Oh God, who was going to tell Mizuko? Who could break that to him? Who was going to tell Daisuke's parents? Or... They probably had already been informed by an emotionless face and a piece of paper. His... His body would be released after autopsy.
"Your teammate, Shun... Well, he's... He will never be able to perform ninja duties again."
I blink in surprise. "What?"
"I'm sorry. They tried to save his leg, and they managed, but they couldn't regain full functionality. His knee is destroyed, several ligaments were snapped, and one part of a muscle had to be removed due to the extensive damage. He'll be crippled for life. He'll need to use a cane to walk. And he'll never be able to perform ninja duties."
"He's alive?" I gasp. "He's alive?!"
She smiled at me. "Yes," she nodded, eyes bright. "He's alive.
Sudden hope surged through me. What if I'd been wrong? What if he... What if Daisuke...?
"Daisuke?" I ask, searching her eyes, "What about Daisuke?"
She closed her eyes and looked away, and that's all I needed to know.
"He was pronounced dead at the scene," she tells me. "His neck was broken."
"Daisuke is dead."
***
Daisuke's funeral seemed unreal.
It was ridiculously beautiful for a funeral. The sun was shining, the bird were singing, and there was the slightest spring breeze whispering through the blooming trees.
Daisuke's mother was sobbing too hard to say anything other than a barely choked out "I love you." It was his father who had to say how strong Daisuke was, how he was vibrant, vivacious, full of life. How he spread his joy to others in the most beautiful way. How he meant the world to them, and would always hold a special place in
everyones' heart.
But no one would ever know just what he meant to me.
How he held me as I cried. How he'd promised to do anything for me. Anytime. Anywhere. Anything. How he'd sworn to protect me, to take me away from my parents and love me forever.
No one would ever know that I loved him back.
I glanced over to Sensei, who'd appeared for the funeral, bent over from the pain of his stomach. His eyes were dead to the world, and it hit me again, how young he was. Seventeen. Seventeen years old and watching his student's funeral. Seventeen and he'd seen so much.
I watched him as he watched Daisuke's father wrap a comforting arm around his wife. Sensei's eyes were dead, emotionless, yet holding an ocean of sadness and guilt and depression at bay.
I turned my head to Shun, who was pressing half his weight onto the cane by his side. He would never be able to be a ninja again. His knee had been destroyed, shattered, the ligaments snapped in ways that were untreatable.
But he'd survived.
Daisuke mother was suddenly in front of me. "Fuzen?"
I nod numbly.
"Oh, Fuzen, thank God you're not hurt. I can't imagine what you must be going through."
I stare at her, confused. She was his mother. How could she possibly care about what I was feeling right now? How could she possibly care that I was physically unharmed other then slight hypothermia and a few scrapes and bruises?
"Daisuke talked all about you, about you and Shun and Sensei. I'm glad..." Her voice chokes off for a second, then she continues. "I'm glad you all are okay."
I stare, not answering her. Okay? Not hurt? We'd been torn apart. I was in more pain than I'd ever experienced. This was more painful than any whipping, beating, bullying, anything I'd ever gone through.
And it would never get better.
But instead of voicing any of the roiling emotions that tore through me I simply nodded, my thoughts mute to the world.
As she turned away Shun walked towards me, Mizuko on his arm, making sure he didn't fall. Every step elicited a grimace of pain, but he continued.
"Fuzen."
"Shun."
There was something broken here in this moment, something broken in the world without Daisuke.
"You got an apartment," I stated.
"Yeah," he nodded awkwardly. "Mizuko and I are roommates. And he helps me down the stairs," he laughed, but the pain made itself clear in his eyes.
The glance they shared made it clear they both hope for so much more than to be just roommates in the future.
I had to look away from them as I realize my chance at something like what they had died when Daisuke did.
"Come to us whenever you need anything," Shun invited. "Team Eleven may be officially dissolved, but you and I both know it will always exist."
"Team Eleven died along with Daisuke," I choke out.
Shun smiled sadly at me. "Maybe it did, a little," he conceded.
I blink rapidly. "I'll see you soon, right Shun?"
He smiled again. "I'm thinking about opening up a bakery. Apparently Mizuko can cook some amazing cookies."
I can't respond, but Shun seems to understand. He places a hand on my shoulder and squeezes before turning away and limping from the funeral.
How could life go on?
***
"Fuzen."
My stomach clenched at the sight of my father. Only a single week had passed since the mission that went so horribly awry.
"I think you've spent much too long moping around. You were never that good of a ninja and now this happened. I think it's time you focused yourself on business."
I don't respond, and he watches expectantly.
"I don't think I can do that, father," I reply emotionlessly. I can see mother's eyes widen from her seat next to father and I spare her a quick glance.
Father's eyes narrow. "Fuzen, this isn't a request," he warns softly.
"And my answer wasn't up for debate," I reply, equally softly.
I look up at him, and I knew as soon as I looked into his eyes: what I was doing here wasn't bravery at all.
I just didn't feel as though I had something to lose.
I had absolutely nothing left to lose.
__________________________
Okay, this was a quick update for two reasons.
One: OMG YOUR COMMENTS ARE SO INSPIRING GAHAHHHHBHHSHX SKZKSJSBDB. Seriously, in one day we've had over 200 comments. THAT is how you get me to update quickly XD
Two: we are reaching the end of the book. (I know, cry with me). I always tend to write more quickly when we reach the end of a story.
SO YOU BETTER COMMENT A TON IF YOU WANT ANOTHER QUICK UPDATE!
ALRIGHTY.
So, you all should have mixed feelings about this chapter XD Shun is alive, but horribly crippled. Sensei is alive, but this is a crushing blow for him. And Daisuke...
Well, I am terribly sorry to sink that ship.
NO DEATH IS WITHOUT REASON.
I promise XD I don't just kill characters off for the feelz lol
That being said, how do you like this chapter?
Boring info time!
I transferred the story,The Frailty of Genius, from my shared account Insomniac_Lullabies to quotev! So if you prefer to read on quotev or whatever check it out there! The account is InsomniacLullabies!
Okay then!
Comment! Vote!
Bye!
gaara119