A/N: Hi guys! A little warning, this story is unedited, so sorry for any grammar mistakes or typos! But other than that, I hope you guys like this chapter!
I dedicate this chapter to one of my sweet readers ;)
Cutie Dan. I mean, look how cute he is. I'd pay to watch him having sex with another guy -->
Dan's POV
"Ssshh, Dan. Quit crying now, I promise we'll find a way to end this nightmare."
I don't know for how long Ash and I lock ourselves in the toilet, I just know that the bell of the first period has rung but none of us have moved from our spot. I'm very shock that I've stopped crying, and now I'm only staring at the wall vacantly.
"I don't know what to do, Ash," I whisper brokenly, "can we get out from here? I don't think I can face other students."
"Sure," he scrambles to his feet, "come on, you can come to my house. There will be no one there, so you can cry your eyes out without anyone watching."
He tells me to stay inside the toilet while he checks the hallway, making sure that everyone has already gone to their class so that they can't see us scurrying to the parking lot.
"Wait, who's going to pick us up? Jared drove me this morning. I don't have my car with me," I ask him, completely terrified that a teacher might catch us in the middle of parking lot and force us to get back to class. The last thing that I want right now is to spend a day in this hell hole with bunch of kids who have seen me having sex with Ryan.
He smiles like a Cheshire cat, "I've sent a quick text to Clayton, telling him that I suddenly feel bad and want to go home. Considering that he's the most paranoid man on the planet, I'm sure he'll be here in five minutes."
True to his words, four minutes later, I can see Clayton's flashy car comes to our direction fast.
"Hi Clayton!" Ash greets his husband cheerfully, completely ignoring Clayton's worried expression.
"You told me that you're not feeling good, but your face shows the opposite," he says coldly after he gives Ash a once-over look.
"Well, actually, it's not me who's not feeling good. It's Dan. Can you please drive both of us to our apartment?" Ash gives him a pleading look that resembles a puppy so much. He knows that Clayton will give him anything when he has that expression on his face.
"I just cancelled a meeting just because you want me to be your personal driver?" Clayton narrows his eyes, looking unimpressed with Ash's antics.
"Please, Clay. It's urgent."
Clayton must hear something in Ash's voice as he darts his eyes on me. His eyes linger a little bit longer at my puffy eyes and disheveled look. "Get in then, I don't have all morning. I have another meeting one hour from now."
"Thanks a lot, Clay," Ash fastens the seatbelt and plants a quick kiss on Clayton's cheek.
"You're paying me tonight sweetheart. That peck doesn't cover the time that I've wasted this morning for you. You'll do things more than that later today." Clayton's whisper is probably only intended for Ash to hear, but I'm unfortunate enough to hear that also.
Some people might find it hot to see a very handsome man like Clayton making sexual innuendos, but right now, even his brief mention of sex makes my stomach churns uneasily. I think it will be a long time for me to think about sex without having an urge to vomit...
"So... what happened?" Clayton asks after five minutes of driving. He darts a quick glance at me from the rearview mirror, looking slightly disgusted when I blow my nose to my sleeve.
"Nothing happened," Ash answers quickly. My poor friend is probably trying to protect me.
"It's okay, Ash," I chimes in tiredly from the backseat, "there will be no difference if you tell him. There are hundreds of people out there who have watched that video anyway."
Ash looks at me one more time to make sure that I'm completely okay with him telling Clayton what happened. After I give him a little nod, he then tries to tell Clayton the whole story without embarrassing me any further. He doesn't have to censor the story though as I'm sure I can't be any mortified than I am right now.
Clayton stays silent for a long time after that. He's probably judging me silently or something, I just could care less of what he thinks.
"You shouldn't be worrying about what other people think. If I were you, I would focus more on finding the person that leaked that video," he says grimly, his eyes blaze with anger, "I know a man that's very good at this. If you want, he can trace the IP address of the person who spread that video in no time."
"You know a man like that?" Ash chimes in before I can answer.
"He works for me. He was the one that gave me all of your personal information actually back then when I stalked you before we got married."
"WHAT?" Gasping in shock, Ash slaps his husband's arm. Clayton doesn't even budge.
"I know that Connor O'Malley was your first kiss. I threatened him not to contact you again two weeks before our wedding," he says nonchalantly as if his creepy stalking habit were normal.
"Thanks for your offer, Clayton. I'll think about that," I say hurriedly once I see Ash's face. His face is so red he looks like he's ready to explode.
"You should tell your brothers. I'm sure Cooper will sue that person's ass and makes them rot in prison," he advises me while dodging Ash's arms that hitting his shoulder.
"NO!" I yell almost hysterically, making both Ash and Clayton freeze in complete surprise. The idea of my brothers finding out what happened makes my blood runs cold,
"please don't tell any of them. They can't find about it. Ever."
Clayton shrugs his shoulders. "Well, it's not my secret to tell. But let me tell you, hiding it from your brothers is a very stupid thing to do. They will find out eventually, and they will get much angrier later than now."
I gulp nervously, knowing that what he said is true. But I just can't face their rage right now. Or even worse, their disappointment. They don't know in the first place, for God's sake, that I've had sex with Ryan. They will lost it if I tell them that not only I've lost my virginity, but also the whole school has seen the process of it.
The whole fiasco about my dad's sudden death and the appearance of his new wife have created a very tense atmosphere in our house, God knows what would happen if I made it worse by telling him about that goddamned video.
True to his words, Clayton only drops us off at his and Ash's apartment before he drives back to his office. Once we get inside, Ash hands me a large bowl of ice cream wordlessly. After years of our friendship, he knows that ice cream is the only thing beside himself that can console me.
"Thanks, Ash. You're the best, you know?" I tell him as I scoop a spoon of Ben and Jerry's.
"You'll probably take back that statement after I say this," he twiddles with his fingers nervously, "it's just that I kinda agree with Clayton. It makes sense that it'd be the best if you come clean with your brothers. I know that they will appreciate it more if they know about that video from you."
Deep down I know that what Ash tells me is true, but I'm a coward and I'm afraid to face my brothers' wrath. I know that they will instantly blame Ryan since it's the most logical explanation that Ryan is the one that leaked it. Although no one has said it out loud, I know that their main suspect is Ryan. But somehow I feel like it's not him. I can't tell you how I know, I just know.
But of course my brothers won't listen to me, and they will beat him and sue his ass before it can be proven that he really is the one who spread the video. This is why I want to find out first who leaked it before I tell my brothers.
I tell Ash about this, and he appears to understand why I'm reluctant to tell my brothers. He knows my brothers' temper after all.
"But are you really sure that he's not the one who did it?" He asks me skeptically, "I mean it's a well-known fact that he's a jerk. No one will be surprised if it turns out the he did it."
"Yeah, I know," I answer dejectedly. I've accepted the fact that Ryan is a douchebag and there's nothing that I can do about it. But like I said before, my heart just tells me that he's not the one who did it. "But I just want to make sure Ash, or it will haunt me forever."
"I'm just afraid that you're being too gullible right now, Dan. I mean the video was taken from the room where you two had sex. Who else had the access to put a hidden camera in that room if not you and him?" he explains carefully, "you didn't give him the consent to record the whole thing, did you?"
"Of course not! I'm not interested on becoming a porn star!" I retort hotly, "oh God, do you think the whole school thinks that I purposely record that damn video? I didn't even know that we were being recorded!"
I start sobbing all over again thinking about how slutty I must be now in the eyes of other students. How could I be so stupid? How could I not realize that there was a camera near us?
Ash sits by my side in a flash. He rubs my back as I cry my heart out into his shoulder. At times like this, I'm really grateful that I have someone like him, someone that I know I can always rely on.
"Dan, I know that this is probably not the best of time, but I've noticed that Ryan has been calling me nonstop for the past hour. He's sent me like ten texts asking me where you are. You should probably check your phone," he informs me, his eyes darting to my phone.
Sniveling, I reach my phone and turn it off. Right to Ash's words, tons of texts start pouring into my phone, and all of them are from Ryan. He also left me lots of voice mails, but I'm too scared to open any of them. While I'm staring at my phone, having no idea what to do with all of those unopened texts, Ryan calls me again. It's like somehow he knew that I have my phone with me now.
My first instinct is to reject the call, but I know that I won't be able to avoid him forever. It's better if I face him now and end this nightmare as soon as possible. So with a sigh, I answer his call.
"Where are you?" Ryan barks from the other end of the line before I can say anything. Neanderthal much?
I glare at my phone, but then I realize that that stupid guy can't see my angry face right now, so I retort harshly, "As far away from you as possible!"
"I'm being serious here, answer me now!" he growls like some sort of animal.
"Do you think growling like a rabid dog will make me tell you where I am? You're only making me want to call the animal control or something!"
"Dan, this will only get worse if you two start fighting instead," Ash reprimands me from beside me.
"You're in Ash's house, aren't you? I'm on my way, and don't you dare move an inch," Ryan ends the call abruptly. He must have heard Ash's voice in the background and guessed that I'm in his apartment.
"Crap, he's on his way," I throw away my phone in frustration.
"Isn't that a good thing? You can demand the truth from him now."
"Yes, I know. But I'm not ready to see his face. It will just remind me of how stupid I was that night. God, what should I do now?" I rant as I walk a hole in Ash's carpet, "I know that we won't have any mature conversation as it's very likely that I'll skin him alive once I see his stupid face!"
"Please don't do that in my apartment. Clayton and I just changed the carpet last week." Typical Ash. He's more worried about his carpet than Ryan's life. I have to admit though that his carpet feels really nice and soft.
I'm angry, confused, and terrified at the same time, but I can't do anything about it. I know that Ryan is coming, and running away is not a choice since I know that Ryan will barge into my house if he doesn't find me in Ash's.
"The doorman just texted me. He said that there's a 'rugged, young man who demands to be let in'. He said he looks like a 'caveman looking for his mate'. I don't know whether I should laugh or bar the front door," Ash chuckles lightly as he reads me the text. Good to know that my misery is his source of happiness.
"Can you buzz him in or something? I want to get over this as soon as possible."
With a resigned sigh, I walk behind Ash and wait as he unlocks his door. Ryan is jiggling his car key impatiently, and he raises his eyes once the door is opened. He stares at me unnervingly for five seconds, his eyes linger on my red, puffy eyes. The next thing that I know is that he pushes Ash aside and envelops me in his arms.
I struggle desperately to get away from his arms, but he only tightens his hold, making me unable to breath.
"Let me go, you bastard!" I push his chest with all my strength, but the Neanderthal doesn't even budge. "LET. ME. GO!"
I feel claustrophobic being swallowed by his arms. With my arms trapped between our bodies and my face smushed against his chest, I basically have nowhere to go. Feeling like a cornered animal, I do the first thing that crosses my mind to break free from his arms.
I kick his nuts.
His reaction is instantaneous. He yelps like a five-year-old and clutches his crotch as if his life depended on it. I cringe a little as I watch Ryan groaning on the floor. Brock once got his nuts kicked by his ex-girlfriend, and he told me that the feeling was equivalent with the pain of labour pains.
Well, if my hunch is wrong and Ryan is indeed the one who spread the video, then he deserves that painful kick. But if it wasn't him.... Oh God, what if I accidentally made him permanently impotent?
"Are you okay?" I ask him innocently while he rolls around in pain. It makes a really funny view actually.
"I don't know, you just kicked my nuts like it were a soccer ball and you were David Beckham," he hisses sarcastically.
Ash, who has been watching us and guffawing in the background, cackles with laughter, "That will remind you in the future not to mess with him."
Ryan shoots us an angry glare while he's trying to get up, wincing every second while doing that.
"Can I talk with you in private, please? But please don't kick my precious part again this time." He keeps looking at my feet apprehensively, afraid that I might attack his crotch for the second time.
"Excuse me, did you just kick me out in my apartment?" Ash's huffs, narrowing his eyes at Ryan's bossy attitude.
"Could you please give us a moment? I will appreciate it very much," Ryan gives Ash his famous charming smile. I shake my head in disbelief as he uses his charm to my friend, and I get even more disbelieved when Ash falls for it. I have to admit though that Ryan can be a charming motherfucker when he wants to, and I also know how dangerous that special trait of his.
"Well, if Dan doesn't mind, then I won't," Ash says slowly, his eyes look dazed after Ryan flashes him his winning smile.
Ash, you moron. You've been telling me not to fall for Ryan's charm. It's easy for you to say that since you had never experienced it by yourself until now, right? It turns out that one smile from him can turn you into a mush.
Ryan has always teased Ash mercilessly, especially after he got married in such young age. He never really shows his charming side to him, and it kind of disappoints me how my friend is no different with his other victims. With me.
"Clayton won't be happy if he sees how transfixed you are with other man's smile," I comment dryly, making Ash blushes in embarrassment.
He quickly darts out of the living room and go to his bedroom to save him from further embarrassment, leaving me alone with Ryan even before I tell him whether I'm okay to be alone with him or not.
"What do you want, Ryan?" I ask unenthusiastically as I plop my butt to Ash's comfy couch. I may look calm and uninterested on the outside, but inside, I feel so nervous to what Ryan will say.
Ryan doesn't answer me at once. He walks towards me and sits on the on the other side of the couch cautiously instead.
"Based from your red rimmed eyes, I assume that you've seen the video. Are you okay?" He looks at my face carefully, his eyes are filled with worry.
"I don't know Ryan. The whole school has seen us having sex. You tell me if I'm okay or not." I don't realize how much I've suppressed my sadness and fear until now. Now that I'm going to have a real discussion about it with Ryan, the dread feeling that I've successfully concealed starts coming to the surface.
Ryan scoots closer to me slowly, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked you that."
"Just tell me, Ryan. And for once, I'm begging you, please tell me the truth!" Ryan looks startled when I start yelling.
"What do you want me to say?" he asks me gently.
I take a deep breath before I finally say, "Did you spread the video?"
He doesn't take his eyes off me as he answers my question calmly, "No, I didn't."
It's funny really that his calm demeanor somehow convinces me that he's telling the truth. If he started yelling and getting all defensive, I would know instantly that he's indeed guilty.
"Okay," I take a deep breath, "but you did record us having sex, didn't you? After all, there was no one but us in that room! Why the hell did you do that, you jackass!" I bombard him with accusations, punching his chest as my tears pour down my face. Ryan doesn't do anything while I make his chest my personal punching bag.
"Dan, will you kick my penis again if I touch you again?" He asks me as his hands slowly creeps closer to my arms.
"Your penis is the last thing you should be worried about since I will sue your ass if you really video taped our whole night!" I scream hysterically.
"I didn't tape our night, Dan. I swear. Even if I wanted to do that, I wouldn't violate your privacy and do that without your concern! Besides, I'm not stupid. If I had recorded the whole thing, I wouldn't have been so careless that other people could see it," he explains in a collected manner, "please believe me, love. I wouldn't do that to you. You should have known by now that I'm a possessive guy. I won't let anyone see you in that state."
His last sentence brings back my memory of that video and how slutty I acted at that time. How I moaned and groaned as Ryan pummeled me... I'm once again hit by waves of shame and embarrassment, making me cry even harder.
"Why didn't we notice that there was a freaking camera near us?" My question is barely intelligible for my body is racked with sobs as I deliver it.
Ryan seems not to care anymore if I will kick his nuts again or not since he engulfs me in his arms. I try to squirm away, but my crying has taken all of my energy. Once I've stopped struggling, I start to realize how comforting his hug really feels. For the first time today I actually feel save, like no one can touch me.
Don't forget how he abandoned you during the toughest time of your life. Remember how he ignored you for days. Remember how he told you to fuck off. Remember how he let Mandy draped all over him when you two were still dating. Remember and never forget.
With a new determination, I push Ryan off me as best as I can. He finally lets go once he's realized that I won't stop squirming until he takes off his arms of me.
"Why won't you let me comfort you?" He looks hurt when I scoot back as far away as possible from him.
Don't fall for it. His expressions are never sincere.
"Because it's not your job to do that," I say curtly.
"I'm your boyfriend, of course it's my job!" He looks at me incredulously.
"You're not my boyfriend," I tell him without looking at his eyes.
"What do you mean I'm not your boyfriend?" For the first time since he stepped into Ash's apartment, Ryan is losing his cool.
"We were done the moment you ignored me for days. We were done the moment you came to school and treated me like I was dust on your shoes. We were done the moment you let Mandy sprawled all over your lap in the cafeteria. We were done the moment you texted me and told me to fuck off. We were done the moment you punched Sebastian, the person I can count on." I spit out vehemently.
Ryan looks as if I just dumped ice cold water on top of his head. I notice that his hand clutches one of Ash's throw pillows so hard that his knuckles turn white.
"You know nothing, Dan," he seethes between his teeth.
"Really? Because the last time I checked, I'm not Jon Snow!" I sass back like a queen that I am.
The furrow between Ryan's eyebrows gets even deeper. When I think that he will punch Ash's coffee table or kick the couch, he chuckles softly instead.
"You're too precious for me to let you go, you know that Dan Sanders? It was not me who sent the text. It also wasn't me who recorded or spread the video. You might not believe me now, but you will. I will find out who did all of those things and prove you that I'm a good man."
"You're not a good man. Even if you didn't do all of those things, that doesn't change that you've done other horrible things to me."
"Yes, I was a jerk. But you have to know that I was confused and afraid. It's the first time for me to feel this way. You're the first person who gives me these mixed feelings. Sometimes I want to kiss you so bad, but sometimes I want to strangle that beautiful neck of yours. Like that time when you laughed at Sebastian's joke." His face turns dark when he mentions me laughing with Sebastian.
"That doesn't impress me. In fact, your speech only makes you sound bipolar."
Ryan smiles gently at me and slowly caresses my cheek, totally unfazed with my sarcasm. "I will show you that I've changed. I'm a better person now. I'm not confused anymore. Seeing you with Sebastian yesterday made me realize that there's nothing that can make me let you go. Not even my own stupidity."
"Yeah? Well, you've let me go. And there's nothing that can make me fall for you all over again," I retort harshly, mimicking his exact words.
Ryan's smile doesn't even faze. "Watch out, Dan. I'm going to get you back. You're about to get wooed."
He gives me one last charming smile before he struts out of Ash's front door.
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