Tahimik lang ako buong byahe at ganoon din naman si Luke Dashiel. Mula nang isakay niya ako sa sasakyan ay hindi na ako umimik.
Our fight was still fresh in my mind. My tears felt fresh too. Nahihiya ako dahil sa naging outburst ko.
"Where are you taking me?" tahimik na tanong ko.
"Sa condo." he shortly answered. I pursed my lips. I have my key with me pero bakit kami pupunta doon? Paano yung party niya? Paniguradong hahanapin siya doon.
"We should go back. Kailangan ka sa party."
"No." hindi niya ako nilingon kahit na nakatingin ako sa kanya. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were sharp and alert.
"Party mo 'yon."
Luke Dashiel's jaw ticked, throwing me an annoyed look. "You think I care?"
Damn this kid. Whatever then. Seryoso siya sa sinasabi kaya hindi na ako sumagot. Tumingin ako sa labas ng bintana at hindi na siya nilingon.
Nang makarating kami sa harap ng isang malaking building ay napakunot ang noo ko. Ngayon ko lang napansin na nasa ibang lugar kami at hindi pamilyar ang pinasukan niya.
Ihininto niya ang sasakyan sa nahanap na parking space at pinatay ang engine. Walang isang salita na lumabas siya mula sa sasakyan at pinanood ko naman siya na umikot para pagbuksan ako ng pinto.
Hindi ako lumabas at blangko na nakatingin lang sa kanya. "This isn't my building."
"Yup. It's mine." tiningnan ko lang siya at hinintay siyang magpaliwanag ng kusa. Nagbuntong hininga siya. "It's a gift from my parents. Let's go."
Kinalas niya ang seatbelt ko. Inabot niya ang kamay sa akin para alalayan ako sa pagbaba. Hindi ko iyon pinansin at bumaba mag-isa. He gave me a wounded look because of that but I just rolled my eyes at him.
Huminga muna siya ng malalim. Isinara niya ang pinto at binuksan ang nasa backseat. Kinuha niya ang pamilyar na paperbag mula doon. I eyed the paper bag and realized that it was my gift.
Nang maisara na ang pinto ay pinatunog niya ang sasakyan. Lumingon siya sa akin at inaya ako. Hindi ko na hinintay pa na abutin niya ang kamay ko at nauna nang maglakad.
Sa elevator ang tuloy ko at hindi na nag-abala pang dumaan sa lobby para mag sign in bilang bisita. Nakasunod sa akin si Luke Dashiel nang pumasok ako. Walang imik na tumingin ako sa pasarang pinto ng elevator habang ang katabi ko naman ay pinindot ang button na may number na twenty.
The elevator dinged. He stepped forward to lead the way when the door opened. Sumunod lang ako sa kanya. He stopped in front of a door and opened it with a key. Ibinukas niya iyon at pinapasok ako.
I walked in as I carefully scanned his new condo. It was spacious. Kompleto na siya sa mga gamit at mukhang mamahalin ang interior design. Neutral colors lang ang nakikita ko kaya nagmukhang mas panlalaki ang buong unit niya.
Nilingon ko ang pinto na mukhang papasok sa kwarto niya. Nang tumingin ako sa likuran ay wala na siya doon. He's by the kitchen counter. Naglabas siya ng baso at kumuha ng tubig mula sa refrigerator. Umupo ako sa couch at inilapag sa tabi ang dala-dalang sling bag.
Dinala niya ang baso na mag tubig at naglakad palapit sa akin. He handed me the glass of water and I accepted it. I was parched, anyway.
Napangalahati ko ang tubig bago ibinalik ko sa kanya ang baso. Inilapag niya iyon sa rectangular glass table na nasa harapan ng couch.
Walang nagsasalita sa amin kaya sobrang tahimik. Hindi ko magawang tumingin sa kanya kaya tinitigan ko na lang ang baso sa ibabaw ng table. Naramdaman ko ang pag galaw ng couch sa gilid ko at ang init na nanggagaling mula sa katawan niya.
"I'm sorry about Nadine." He quietly uttered, breaking the silence.
Inangat ko ang mukha ko at tiningnan siya. His eyes were sad as he stared at my face. Bumagsak ulit ang mga mata ko at kinagat ang ibabang labi.
Bigla akong nakaramdam ng guilt dahil ako naman ang may kasalanan sa away naming dalawa. Maliit na bagay ay pinalaki. I was being completely immature. Noong kami ni Logan ay hindi naman ako ganito. Hindi ako ganitong...
"I'm extremely possessive. I feel propietary over you. Pakiramdam ko akin ka lang. Hindi yon tama. Hindi dapat ganon." I said as I realized.
Lumabas ang takot sa mukha niya. His eyes became wild and desparate.
Umiling siya sa akin. "I don't care. I don't care if it's wrong. I don't care if you're possessive. You own me, Avis. You've owned me even before you knew it."
"That's destructive, Luke Dashiel."
"Hindi pa ba malinaw sa'yo?" maamo niya akong tiningnan. Ang mga mata niya ay nanatili sa mga mata ko. I was melting under his stares. Sa bawat segundo na tumitingin siya sa akin ay naauubusan ako ng hininga. "I don't care if this love
will destruct me. If that's what it takes to love you, then go and destruct me all you want. I don't care."
Tumalon ang puso sa loob ng dibdib ko at para naman akong nalagutan ng hininga. Hindi ko nakayanan ang bigat ng nga titig niya kaya bumagsak ang mga mata ko. Kung saan na ako tumingin basta maiwasan lang ang mga mata niya.
I burned from the spark that his skin caused when he cupped my chin with his hand. He tipped my head to make sure that I was looking at him directly in the eyes.
"I don't care, Avis. I don't." bulong nito. Malapit ang mukha niya sa akin. He was piercing my soul through his stares and I couldn't calm my heart. His face was close, he was looking at me so intently.
I closed my eyes. I was overwhelmed by the feelings that were waving through my chest. Sa sobrang umaapaw ang nararamdaman ko ay damang-dama ko ang pagkirot 'non. Sa sobrang sakit ng puso ko ay pakiramdam ko sasabog na lang ito bigla.
My heart beat quickened when I felt Luke Dashiel's warm breath fanned my face. It was a combination of his usual minty breath and light alcohol. He's going to kiss me. Nanatili ang pagkakapikit ng mga mata ko kagaya ng pagnanatili ng kamay niya sa baba ko.
Something ricocheted inside me when his lips softly pressed against mine. I almost moaned, pained with a very unexpected need. I didn't realize I was longing for this until this very moment.
He took his time tasting my lips. He was licking my upper lip with precision and care. He tongued my bottom like it was delicate. I felt his tongue slide in my mouth. He brushed his tongue against my own, teasingly and with ease.
His hand slipped on my waist while the one holding my chin pressed flat against my cheek. His palm was warm and so was my face. My body heat was raising with every passing second. My hands situated on his back, clawing against his shirt.
I felt his thumb brushing against my bare back. I wanted more of his skin on me. Badly need to. "Your dress is so tiny, Avis..." he whispered against my lips. I didn't say a word and kept on kissing him. I wanted to kiss him harder, with desperation, but I also want him to take control.
Luke Dashiel's kisses were slow and deep, every graze of his tongue sends immense gratification in my body. His hand moved from my lower back, carefully inching towards my nape. His fingers fumbled on the lock, unclasping the material from my neck. The top part of the dress fell on my waist and now my breasts were exposed.
He broke the kiss. He gasped when he realized that my upper body was free from any barrier. His eyes darkened as he raked my body with his lustful stares. He licked his lips and returned his eyes on me. He was breathing hard.
"God, Avis." he grabbed me by the waist with his both hands and easily straddled me on him. His hands were fast to grab my head to mesh our lips together. The slow kisses of Luke Dashiel became desperate, hard and needy.
My heart pumped fast in excitement when I felt his hardness poking me. I needed to feel him. I got to feel him. I grind myself against him, hard and slow. My body tingled at the taste of pleasure that I will receive if I continued what I was doing. He stiffened under me, his lips stopped moving as a feral groan torn out from him.
He heaved, his length thickening underneath me. Damn it. I want to feel him in me. Now. I knew I could take control if I wanted to, but I wanted him to take the lead. I must constrain myself.
Luke Dashiel recovered and his hands left the back of my head and gripped tightly on my waist. l shortly squealed when he stood up with me still straddled on him without a warning.
He didn't say a word and kissed me as he walked. l clung my arms on his nape and lifted my body to kiss him like I'd die any second without it.
"Hold on tight," his voice was thick and different. I followed his command and latched unto him, my legs wrapped tighter on his waist, not ever wanting to let go. He went back to kissing me even when his hand left the back of my thigh.
I heard him open the door, probably to his bedroom and he entered then kicked it shut. My lips were already tingling from the kisses but I didn't want to stop.
He tugged my bottom lip with his teeth, suckling on it hard that it felt like it already ran out of blood. He broke away from me again as he laid me gently on his king size bed. I took that time to breathe and see him.
His lips were very red and sullen, his eyes were sharp and focused. He was breathing hard like me as he watched me from his bed. He bit his lip when we were both done watching each other and our eyes met.
I held his muscled arm, silently pleading for him to kiss me again. I clenched on it before brushing it to the back of his head. I urged him closer to me and he followed and leaned towards me, placing his hands on both sides of my body against the mattress to support himself.
He placed another kiss on my lips, shortly passing by my jaw and then took his time on my neck. I felt him lick my neck with his tongue and l moaned.
My body arched, my breasts brushing against his clothes. My nipples hardened at the contact. I want him bare. God, how I want him bare so badly.
I traveled my hands to his chest and undid the buttons of his long sleeved shirt fast. I pushed my hands on his chest and he raised his body away from me as I removed his shirt for him, throwing it somewhere on the room.
Luke Dashiel moved his body and aligned his face to my chest before quickly taking my right nipple on his mouth. I took a sharp breath, my fingertoes curling inside my stilettos.
He placed a hand on my free breast, massaging it in a circling motion as he tongued and sucked and tongued my nipple simultaneously. My head thrashed as another moan escaped my lips.
I want his tongue on me. On me. I raised my hips and pressed it against his stomach, rubbing myself on him. He must have sensed my desperation for contact because he let go of my other breast, and used it to completely remove my dress off me.
His lips left my breast as he lowered his face, placing butterfly kisses to every area of skin that he was passing by. Luke Dashiel's breath rags as he nears the top hem of my underwear.
"Avis, I want a taste..." his voice was needy and pained. Damn it. I think it made me wet, if I wasn't already. His need for me completely turns me on.
"I'm not stopping you." my voice was non existent. I sounded rasp and breathless.
I tugged my bottom lip with my teeth and waited for him to remove my underwear. It was so quiet in the room that I heard a loud swallow from him as he hooked my pantie with his fingers. Even the small tip of his fingers grazing against my skin sent me pleasure.
My brain exploded into unrecognizable pieces when he swiftly placed his mouth on me. I gasped when I felt his tongue stroke my clit.
My eyes closed tight. I shivered, already wetter than ever with just one stroke. Damn it. Damn it.
"Luke Dashiel..." l moaned loudly in the room. I reached for his head and managed to grip on his hair. I pushed his head forward as I lifted my hips to press myself closer.
I bent my knees up as he held my thighs to keep me in place as he continuously flicked his tongue on my mound.
Luke Dashiel's firsts are all mine. And my every firsts that matters are to him. I know this is his first time, I'm sure, but his goodness at pleasuring me with his mouth was too exquisite that makes me wanna have second thoughts. He was too good.
I don't want to think anyone but him at this moment but I couldn't help but compare. I've never liked Logan going down on me because it made me uncomfortable, but with him... I wanted more. I crave for more.
"Avis, you taste so good... Really good." he mumbled as he ate me whole.
He motioned his tongue in a circular motion and I gasped once again. He suck, flicked, and teased that it didn't take long when I finally reached my peak and shuddered into orgasmic bliss.
"Shit. I need to be in you." he hissed. I was still trying to recover from the heaven that I was sent into that I didn't notice him take off his pants and boxer briefs.
"Condom." I demanded, even when my head's still reeling from what he did to me. We need to be safe. We can't risk having another pregnancy scare.
I heard a drawer open and then close. A ripping of a foil echoed in my ear. Few seconds later the bed moved and I finally had the energy to open my eyes and watch him.
He was quick to align himself on me. He parted my bent knees wider, positioning his raging member against my heat. My heart was pounding in my ears.
He placed his body on top of me, his chest brushing my breasts. Luke Dashiel pressed his lips again mine, covering my loud gasp when he entered my hole.
Ahhh..." my mouth opened even with his lips on mine. He captured my tongue and sucked it once. My eyes closed at the second penetration and it was his turn to groan.
He removed his mouth from my lips but pressed his forehead on mine. I could feel his burning stares through my eyelids. My eyes fluttered open to confirm my feeling and l was right.
His eyes were filled with mixed emotions. His gazes shouts adoration as he worshiped my body with every thrust. He cupped my face with his hand, his hips still continuously moving.
He brushed my cheek as he pushes himself down and deeper. My inner wall contracts around his thick length whenever he slides inside me. Luke Dashiel watched me the whole time, never leaving my eyes for a second. Not once did he looked away from me.
He hit my most pleasurable spot. I mewled, my hands reaching for his back as l raked his skin with my nails.
"God. I'm close, Luke. I'm close."
The pumping of his hips kept the same slow pace but every pump became harder and harder each time. I could tell that he's about to come too because his eyes were tightly shut. He growled and kissed me on the lips.
"Go faster, please." I ordered when he released my lips and he shook his head, still eyes closed.
"No... I want this slow." he moved his hips again, twice, and it was on the third time when I finally raised my own hips to meet his every hard thrusts.
My entire body suddenly tensed. My head spun and I think I just saw stars. I climaxed, reaching my peak as l moaned freely and without any inhibition.
He placed his mouth near my ear as he breathed hard, he was still moving his hips-pushing and pulling as he rasped, "I love you so fucking much, Avis. I love you. Damn. I can't lose you anymore. I won't survive it."
He froze on top of me as he gave me a one last thrust. "Fuck!" His body shook hard as he released everything.
Luke Dashiel buried his face on the side of my neck. We were both hot and sweating, his warm and heavy breath fanning my skin.He kissed the side of my head. A tight clench made its presence known in my heart. He whispered again. "Mahal na mahal kita."
Narinig ko naman na sa kanya iyon dati. Alam ko na rin na ganoon kalalalim ang nararamdaman niya... But God... This is all fucked up because I'm so damn in love with him too.