---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------TRIGGER----------------
-----------WARNING---------------
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I hate everything,
I fucking hate everything!
I walk in the bathroom, and sit on the toilet.
Flashbacks just fill my mind.
My dad on his knees, begging me to stop hurting myself.
I fucking hate everything!
My dad beating me for no damn reason.
I fucking hate everything!
Him hitting me just because he was pissed off a something.
I fucking hate everything!
Him hitting me just because he felt like it.
I fucking hate everything!
I can't do this anymore.
I fiddle the blade between my fingers.
I fucking hate everything!
I'm not suppose to do this,
I'm not suppose to fucking do this.
I fucking hate everything!
I promised him.
I can't help it.
I have to do this.
I fucking hate everything!
"I'm sorry." I whisper.
I'm always sorry.
I grab the blade tightly and cut my arm, once, twice, three times.
I fucking hate everything!
I let the blood come out.
I've missed this feeling.
The pain.
It calms me down.
I fucking hate everything!
I make a few more,
But then I realize the blood is quickly coming out.
I hurry to the sink,
And wash the the blood off.
I stand their for awhile focusing on the pain.
'A few more.' Something in my head tells me. 'A few more.'
"No." I tell it. "I can't, I promised."
'You already did it, why not?" The voice says.
"No." I raise my voice. "I'm sorry, I promised."
"Do it." It says.
"No, no, no, no, no, no." I repeat. "I'm so sorry. I'm so fucking sorry." I say. I collapse on the floor. Not really knowing who I'm talking to.
I really fucking hate everything!
(I don't know what this is...... a poem, I guess. Well, yeah)