Whrath
I don't know how much longer I could do this. Working myself to the bone. Forcing myself not to drop to my knees at his feet and beg. But I was fed up. Frustrated and angry. Couldn't he see that I was protecting him. Saving him the heartache.
I watch him talking with my family. Laughing with them. And not with me. I can't take it anymore. That's what had me here. With a knee to my gut and a pissed off angel cussing me out. It could have been the demon juice too. Father always says overindulgence gets you in trouble.
"What the hell Whrath! You can't just throw me over your shoulder like some sort of caveman and drag me to your lair! I'm not some helpless damsel!" I stood. Somewhat more sober. I think. He just looks so beautiful.
"Ascari." I whispered. Staring. They were all staring. I don't care.
"We have things to talk about." at least I'm not slurring my words.
"Like what? What Whrath? What do you have to say? What do you want?" he looked at me like the ugliest thing he's ever seen.
I open my mouth but they don't come out. The things I want to say. I try again. My heart picks up its pace and suddenly I'm stone cold sober. What do I say? I hang my head and let out a breath.
So many things indeed. I want you. I need you. I hate that bed without you in it. I can't sleep unless your scent fills my nose and you are in my arms. I wish you would smile at me. I want it all with you. You are mine. My friend. My lover. My angel. My mate. I miss you. I love you.
But I don't. They never left my lips, those words. I fidgeted. We look at each other. Each sizing the other up. I look at his face. This is what they mean when they say the face of an angel.
Ascari
I see him fidgeting. His family quiet. Shocked. I wait. Then wait some more.
Then it hits me. Things I never knew. Truths I didn't want to see.
"You are a walking contradiction. All that bullshit of wanting deeper. You don't know what you want do you Whrath?" I accused. We both know it's true.
"Ascari."
"Shut up! You had your chance to talk. Now it's my turn. You're a liar." his eyes flickered.
"I know."
"You're a coward." he flinched. My voice hoarse. Shocked because I see it now that I've voiced it.
"Yes." he said looking me in the eyes then looking away.
"You're afraid. Scared of me." I whispered in disbelief. He dropped to his knees. Hands hanging by his side.
I want to drop there with him. Hold him. Let him hold me. But I don't. Instead I approached him. Taking his face in my hands. The stubble of his four o'clock shadow scraping against my palms.
"You know what we had. What we could be Whrath." he took my wrists.
"Yes... Incredible." he whispered.
"Incredible." I confirmed. Then I do. I drop to my knees in front of him and held him as he held me. Two fragile souls. Then I let go.
"You always told me I was strong. I never believed it until now. I am strong. It's you who is weak. And until you conquer your fear we can't be anything." his eyes turn that electric blue, tears swimming in those eyes that holds me captive.
"It's deeper or nothing Whrath." I closed my eyes and rest my forehead against his for a moment. Then I stand. Holding my head high. I leave him there. Half expecting him to try and stop me. A single tear rolls down his cheek and I run. I run away because I would have ran towards him.
I don't want mediocre when we could have incredible.
A/N
Shout out