A/N Sorry, another lengthy delay, had a family trip...back now. Next chapter tomorrow. Promise. Thanks for the patience, MZ
Chapter Thirty Six
"You're going back?" Freya's mother looked sad. They'd had a brilliant week in Spain, and a wonderful six weeks before that. But she'd been gone for almost two months, and whether or not she wanted to go back to that upstate New York town, the fact that Simon was about to be sentenced after his guilty plea, meant that she had to go back.
She'd wondered if Mitchell Cooper would contact her during her time away, but he hadn't. Not until today, the day she'd decided to go back anyway. The email still sat in her inbox glaring at her, but she couldn't bring herself to open it. Her mother had been a huge help in keeping her distracted, and when she wasn't directly focussing on him, life was easier, but at night she couldn't fight it. She wanted to hate him, wished she could say that she never wanted to see him again. But she couldn't. She missed him like hell, they'd spent so much time together, he got her, in a way that she only thought academics could. No one had ever made her laugh like he did, or made her feel appreciated, or cooked such perfect steaks. But he had lied to her, she couldn't deny that fact, and she wasn't about to roll over and make things easy for him. Despite her feelings, she wasn't about to pretend that it was all good; she'd been a doormat with Simon, happy to suffer painfully waiting for him to throw her some crumbs. She'd been sad and deluded and he'd lied to her to. No more. She was going to attack him, force him to admit to why he was being so emotionally inept, it had been good between them, better than good, despite her inexperience she knew that it was. So he had to tell her why he was about to throw that away, right after she punched him in the nose for the lies he'd told her. That was her priority, right before she sat in the gallery in the local courthouse and watched Simon sentenced for his assault on her and Mitchell Cooper. He'd pleaded guilty, so his charges were dropped from kidnap and attempted murder, which seemed a little excessive by Freya's standards, to some form of assault, but it was serious enough to see a term of imprisonment.
The fraud, conspiracy and industrial related charges were only a matter of time. And they could add to that, she felt a little pity for him, he hadn't been a bad man, she'd known him for years, the last few months...well they were out of character. Then she thought about the way he'd spoken about her, the way he'd wanted to implicate her in his deceit, the time in the house...the state of Mitchell Cooper's head after he'd attacked him. Whether it was out of character or not, she wanted nothing to do with him, and had to remind herself that he could have killed her, or her landlord, and she couldn't bear thinking about that. No, he'd brought everything on himself; she had no reason for misplaced guilt or concern for him, if anything she should hate him.
And she still had to face him in court, give a victim statement, tell the judge the impact his attack had had on her life. She'd never known true fear until he had grabbed those kittens, and that was only superseded by the silence after she escaped, the concern at what he may have done to Mitchell Cooper...what he had done.
So she was going back?
She looked at her mother and nodded, "I have to deal with things, unfinished business."
Nodding, her mother sipped at her tea joining her daughter's perusal of the view from the landscaped garden of their home, "I get that...though I sense it's a lot more than just this court case."
Instantly defensive Freya shook her head, "of course it's more than a court case, that man has ruined everything I had, everything I am." She took a steadying deep breath, "THAT is what this is about."
Smiling knowingly her mother patted her hand, "if you say so darling, but since you came back, on this trip...you've been more settled than I've ever seen you. You seem distracted, but you're not going on about work, you've not mentioned how bereft you feel without the mind fuel that you've always needed. Yet you are sad...about something."
Freya knew she was blushing; her mother had kind of summed up the whole situation perfectly.
Lifting her head, she sighed, "how do you know?"
"About all this?"
Freya shook her head, "no, if it's the right person...with Dad..."
She hadn't shared emotions with her mother for as long as she could remember, but suddenly it seemed like the right thing, the right time...she was floundering with her decision making, she had no experience with men, with friends...with most social situations.
"Your father?" he mother stared at her for a moment. "How did I know he was the one for me?"
Freya hated that she was blinking back tears as she nodded, she wanted to know what to do about Mitchell Cooper, she had no one else to ask, and she was going around and around in circles, wanting to hit him, call him, cry, scream. She was a swathe of emotions and she needed something.
"From the moment I met him he charmed me. Nothing was ever too much...though he never made me feel less equal than him, he was chivalrous without being domineering, and he wasn't too scared to say he loved me. He was open with his feelings, didn't care who knew what was happening, how he felt. I loved it; I loved being loved by him. And it has never changed." She reached out to take her daughter's hand, "you'll know when you meet someone who makes up your other half, that makes you laugh, that takes time to know what you like...that treats you as you deserve to be treated. Have you?"
Freya blinked; swiping at tears then gave an immature shrug, looking away.
Her mother took her hand, "demand the best Freya, you are beautiful, you are intriguing, hard working...brilliant. You deserve the very, very best. ok. Don't ever settle for less, but men are stubborn, thick headed, sometimes they don't know what's in front of them till it's gone, and sometimes you have to make them realise..."
"What do you mean?"
She laughed, "well, whilst your father worshipped me, he still loved to play football, to hang out with his friends...but you know I just used to give him little visual or verbal reminders as to why I was a better option for an evening than his mates." She smiled, "underwear...little notes..."
Freya blushed, "mother, this is really crossing boundaries."
Again she laughed, "who cares? All I want is for you to be happy...if it works out in the States...can I come visit? Meet this man?"
Freya rolled her eyes and turned back to her mug of coffee. She was going to miss her mother, and for as long as they were talking, laughing...she didn't have to think about the email waiting in her inbox.
"What did you expect? An instant reply? Her to gush with gratitude?"
Coop watched as Natalie burst into laughter, "I emailed her, I apologised...profusely..."
Again she laughed, "two months after the event! She's hardly about to email you straight back forgetting what a dick you've been."
"I am NOT a dick."
"Really? You turned her over for no reason. Or not one that you have the balls to admit to." She continued cleaning the bar, "and now YOU are pissed off that she hasn't replied to your email? Listen to how that sounds."
He hung his head for a moment, "I don't know what to do. You make this sound simple."
She shook her head, "I'm not expert on all this shit Coop, don't ever think that, but I do know that you should have apologised a long time ago. You'll be lucky if she talks to you ever again..."
He groaned, "so what do I do?"
"Beg? Grovel? I don't know. But sitting here in denial that you've done anything wrong, feeling sorry for yourself, that doesn't help anyone. Do you WANT her back in your life?"
He shrugged, "I need to see her, need to talk to her, more than anything."
"Then tell her that, and make it so that she can't NOT listen to you. You have to make a gesture."
Staring at her he shook his head, "I can't do this Natalie, that is the whole point."
"Then say goodbye to her, cos you don't deserve her."
She disappeared into the storeroom leaving him to draw a blank. He had no idea what he should be doing; he hadn't ever cared about anyone before, not like this, not friendship, not needing someone. Not even Michelle, they'd never had that sort of relationship, they'd not had a relationship at all, not really, he could see that now. She'd been self centred, loved his status and his money, she'd never cared for him half the amount that Freya had in their brief time together. There was a sign that there was more; that there was something good between them, not the sex, though that was spectacular, no there was a connection between them, more than passion, more than lust. He needed her like oxygen, the pas two months had proved that he was unable to function adequately. If Natalie hadn't taken her new manager role to heart then he'd be up shit creek with his business, the way his life was.
"You need to find her, Jesus Coop; I can't do this FOR you. You need to find her, tell her that you miss her."
He looked up, "I know where she is, her parents..."
"So get their number from her brother."
He shook his head, "he doesn't want me anywhere near her. He hates me; he doesn't want me to touch her."
Natalie laughed, "ANOTHER excuse Cooper. What the fuck is wrong with you? So you piss him off. So what?"
Coop jumped to his feet, "you're right. He knows where she is. He can tell me. Thanks Natalie!"
Oscar was packing a bag when he got back to the warehouse, the atmosphere between the two had been worse than frosty since he'd come back from the cabin, but Coop knew he couldn't worry about that...he didn't worry. He REALLY did want to find Freya, that was his priority.
"You going somewhere?"
Oscar looked up and then nodded, "yup. Hawaii, big problem in the flagship hotel there."
"Sounds like a hardship," Coop offered. That got a smile from Oscar, finally. "So...I need to get hold of Freya..."
"Fuck you!"
He took a deep breath, watching the anger contort his friend's face, "she was an emotional wreck...YOU...you made her like that. I trusted you to look out for her and what the fuck did you do? She said that nothing happened, that you looked after her, but she was a shadow...pale, troubled...and she had all that shit to deal with too..." He shook his head, "you are a bastard and I am just as likely to cut off my right testicle as give you any way of contacting her."
He threw a few more things into his back, head dropped as Coop formulated a response.
"She's special Oscar, and I miss her..."
"You miss her?" He stood up, squared up to him, "don't push it, because I am an inch away from ruining your face."
Coop ran a hand through his hair, "is she coming back? I mean all her things are here. I need to talk to her, that's it, that's all. I swear."
Shaking his head he zipped up his bag, "talk to her? You? I have known you years and I've seen you fuck and dump hundreds of women, she will NOT become part of this, ok? You will not ruin her with your inability to commit to anything, fuck Coop; you don't even have a debt to your name. You have NOTHING holding you anywhere, you can disappear like that..." he clicked his fingers. "She needs someone with time, who wants her, cherishes her, THAT'S what she deserves, so like FUCK will I give you a number or a detail to get hold of her. Got that?"
"Give whose number?"
The voice from behind them was so, so familiar that Coop felt his knees weaken as he spun around to face her, the woman he hadn't been able to get out of his head. Freya was back.