"Avis!" rinig ko ang boses ni Luke Dashiel mula sa malakas na tugtog pero hindi ako huminto. Halos itinakbo ko na ang resort para lang hindi niya ako maabutan.
Nang makarating sa lobby area ay saktong bumukas ang elevator. Tatlo lang ang floors ng building pero malawak iyon kaya marami pa ring rooms.
Hindi ako naabutan ni Luke Dashiel sa elevator. Pinindot ko ang third floor. Ang gusto ko lang ngayon ay maligo at pagkatapos ay matulog.
Sa room ang deretso ko. Nang makalampas ako sa hagdan ay narinig ko ang mga hakbang ni Luke Dashiel. Tinawag niya ulit ang pangalan ko kaya binilisan at nilakihan ko lalo ang bawat hakbang.
Ipinasok ko ang susi sa door knob at mabilis na ibinukas ang pinto para makapasok. Itutulak ko pa lang pasara ang pinto ay napigilan agad iyon. Napasinghap ako nang makita si Luke Dashiel na nakahawak sa pinto.
"Avis..." his voice was pleading.
Hindi na ako nag-abala pang makipagtulakan sa kanya. Binitawan ko ang pinto at hinayaan siya sa gustong mangyari. Tumuloy ako sa paglakad sa loob ng kwarto. Inalis ko ang damit na nakatali sa bewang ko at ihinagis iyon sa tabi ng kama.
"Let's talk please,"
Sinamaan ko siya ng tingin. "Ayaw kitang kausapin. Why don't you go and talk to that girl?"
"Avis naman..." mahinahon na sambit niya.
"Ano? I'm mad at you and I don't want us to talk. Hindi mo na nga sinunod ang sinabi ko sayo kahapon, pati ba naman ito, Luke Dashiel?"
"I don't want this night to end with you mad at me." malungkot na sambit nito. "I don't want you mad."
"Then quit doing things that'll make me mad!" hindi ko napigilan ang sarili ko sa pagsigaw. My heart was racing and I could feel the adrenaline that was rushing in my veins.
"Hindi ba sabi ko sayo, hindi ka pwede sumama? I thought we already talked about this yesterday? You went back on your words, Luke. Sinabi ko na sayo na may pasok ka bukas and I don't want you to miss your classes because of me pero itinuloy mo pa rin ang gusto mo!"
Wala akong plano na pakinggan ang sasabihin niya. This is my time to talk about my issues. I'm not asking for his explanation. I'm the one who's gonna do all the talking here. Hindi ako titigil hanggat hindi ko nasasabi ang lahat-lahat.
"Ang hirap kasi sayo, hindi mo ako naiintindihan. I just don't want you to slack because of me. Ayaw kong magmukhang bad influence sa'yo. I know you want to spend time with me, and I want that too. I so badly want it that it feels insane."
"And now what? Were you trying to make me jealous?" nag-iinit ang buong mukha ko sa sobrang galit. "I told you I don't like seeing you with other girls! I hate it. God, Luke Dashiel, you don't know how badly I want to pull the hair of every girl that you've been with."
Nanatiling walang imik si Luke Dashiel at mukhang hindi alam ang isasagot sa lahat ng sinabi ko.
"Are you even really mine?" bulong ko at halos pumiyok ang boses ko sa pagsabi 'non. Mariin na pinikit ko ang mga mata at nahihirapan sa sariling nararamdaman. Kumikirot ang puso ko.
Ayaw ko nang magsalita pa. Ayaw ko rin na marinig ang maaring sagot niya. I shouldn't have gushed out like that. I've said too much.
"Avis... I don't know that girl. Wala akong pakialam sa kanila. Ikaw lang-"
Iniling ko ang ulo ko at iminulat ang mga mata. Tumigil si Luke Dashiel sa pagsasalita. He looked so unsure. Maingat ang ekspresyon sa mukha niya habang bakas naman ang pag-aalala sa mga mata niya.
I love his eyes. It was expressive and deep, I want to drown in it. His whole face was slightly red. Hindi ako sigurado kung dahil sa alcohol o dahil sa pag-uusap naming dalawa. His lips were luscious red and tempting. I wanted to taste it. Terribly so.
His jaw was still lickable. His neck, it was enticing me to take a bite. Sunod na bumaba ang mga mata ko sa hubad na itaas na bahagi ng katawan niya. There were firm and defined muscles everywhere. Hindi ganoon kalaki ang muscles niya pero sapat na iyon para maglaway ako.
I now know what I wanted earlier. Why I was so disappointed when Luke Dashiel backed away. I was craving for him. I wanted his kiss. I was aching for his touch. I feel frustrated right now. I shouldn't be lusting over him. It's wrong but I couldn't stop myself even if I wanted to.
Something was building inside me. A primal urge was building up from within me. There's a longing too, a void that needs filling. Kahit anong malamig na titig pa ang ibigay ko sa kanya ay ramdam ko pa rin ang nag-iinit na katawan ko.
I could deny all the affinity that I want but I can't hide the fact that it's there.
"You need to leave." my voice was thick. I sounded needy but miraculously restrained.
"No..." umiling si Luke Dashiel. Seryoso at buo ang boses niya. He sounded resolved. "You're still mad. I'm not leaving until we're okay."
"Luke Dashiel please..." my firm walls were starting to crack. I was scared to witness it fall, or what will happen if it comes to that.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I came here when you said I can't. I'm sorry if I made you jealous. I don't want any girls but you, Avis. I only want you. I want us together."
Kinagat ni Luke Dashiel ang ibabang labi niya. "Can we be together? Officially? Kahit tago, Avis... Pwedeng tayo? Sayo lang ako. Pwedeng akin ka?"
Nanikip ang dibdib ko at halos hindi alam ang sasabihin. Ibinuka ko ang bibig para magsalita pero walang kahit anong lumalabas doon.
I've already asked myself if I could try being with Luke Dashiel days ago. My answer was maybe. Hanggang ngayon ay hanggang 'siguro' lang ako. Dahil alam kong hindi pwede ang 'oo'. At kung posible nga bang dumating ang panahon na magiging 'oo' iyon.
Ang tanging alam ko lang ngayon ay hindi ko kayang layuan si Luke Dashiel. Ilang beses ko na sinubukan lumayo sa kanya. Ilang beses ko na rin siya pinagtulakan pero kung hindi ki siya hihilahin pabalik at kusa naman siyang lumalapit. Kahit anong gawin ko ay sa kanya pa rin ang bagsak ko.
If I say yes to him now, I could only wish that it would last. Kahit na alam ko na imposible ay hihilingin ko pa rin. All I could do is hope.
At kung hindi man ito magtatagal ay magpapasalamat na lang ako na kahit saglit ay naging masaya ako kasama siya.
Huminga ako ng malalim. Pumikit ako at pinag-isipan mabuti ang gagawin. Idinilat ko ang mga mata at tiningnan ang umaasang si Luke Dashiel.
Kinagat ko ang ibabang labi bago inangat ang kamay ay inabot ang string na nakatali sa likod ko. Hinatak ko iyon at na-estatwa si Luke Dashiel sa kinatatayuan.
"Avis, what are you doing?" Paos ang boses niya nang nagtanong. Sinunod kong tanggalin ang tali sa batok at tuluyan nang bumagsak ang bikini top ko. Napasinghap siya at mabilis na inilagay ang tingin sa nga mata ko. Na-estatwa si Luke Dashiel sa kinatatayuan niya.
Hindi na ako nag-abala pang sumagot. Hindi ko na rin hinintay ang susunod niyang sasabihin at hinakbang na ang pagitan naming dalawa. It only took me two steps to reach him, two seconds to slip my arms on his nape, and one second to occupy his lips with mine.
Luke Dashiel gasped when our lips connected. I used that moment to slide my tongue inside his mouth. I kissed him with my all and prayed for him to kiss me back. I leaned my head to the right, playing my tongue against his. A moan escaped from my throat when he returned every passionate kisses.
My fingers buried its own on Luke Dashiel's hair. I shivered when the warmth of his palm flattened against my back. He caressed the side of my body, tracing my curve with care. Luke Dashiel pulled me to him, my breasts pressing hard across his chest. My center pulsed at the sensual contact and I instantly crave for more.
It never felt this good before. We haven't done anything but kiss and yet it already felt so much more. My inhibition was lost, all I could do right now was feel and cherish. I tipped my head back when Luke Dashiel moved his mouth to my jaw, kissing every inch until he reached the side of my neck. I mewed as I rolled my hips, desperate to feel him on me.
"Bed," I whispered, my voice didn't sound like mine. It was laced with need and lust.
I held the side of his head and moved my face to capture his mouth again. I need his kisses. I want everything that he could give me in this very moment.
I pressed both of my hands on his chest, pushing him backwards without breaking our kiss. I pulled away from him when the back of his knees hit the bed side. Luke Dashiel's eyes were filled with desire, exactly like mine.
Luke Dashiel's back was on the bed and I didn't waste time, straddling him on his stomach. He raised his upper body to reach for my lips again. He kissed me like my kisses were his version of air and that he couldn't survive without it.
"Touch my breasts." I murmured between our kisses, reaching for his hands to guide it on my chest. I bit his bottom lip when he lightly squeezed each globes on his hands. I was burning inside and out. I could tell that I was already wet and ready. It would be so easy for me to remove my bikini bottom, slide his shorts off and ride him but I want us to take our time. I want this to last.
Luke Dashiel gently chewed my lips. I released his hands and let him massage my breasts on his own. A satisfied hum vibrated from my chest. My eyes shut close. This was heaven, having his hands on my body made me wanton.
I reached the back of his head, pulling him close to my chest. I used my free hand to shove his hands on my breast and lead his mouth to my bosom. I didn't need to tell him what to do, Luke Dashiel immediately suckled my breast. My body arched at the incredible sensation.
Luke Dashiel followed suit even when I leaned back. His tongue still playing with my left nipple while his other hand played with my right breast. I moaned out loud, moving my hips to grind against him. His members was pressing on my center, extremely hard and warm. He released a groan when I grated hard and slowly against him. I felt pleased, hearing him moan and being the one to cause it.
I placed my mouth on him again, kissing him hard and fast this time. I'm bursting with need. I'm dying for him to fill me. I want him terribly.
"I need you, Luke Dashiel. I want you in me." I begged, reaching for his shorts. I undid the button, pulling the zipper down before taking it off of him. Luke Dashiel gasped and sat up straight, reaching for my hands to stop me.
"Avis," Luke Dashiel was breathless. "I-I've never..."
Namula ang buong mukha ni Luke Dashiel at hindi ko mapigilan ang paglabas ng ngiti sa mukha ko. He looked damn edible. Hearing him admit that didn't lessen his appeal on me. It made me want him even more than ever, if it's even possible to want him this much.
Kahit anong pilit na alis ang gawin ko sa ngiti ko ay hindi maalis-alis iyon. Umiling-iling ako at inilapit ang mukha para siilin ng halik ang mga labi ni Luke Dashiel. Madiin at matagal ang halik na iyon. Itinigil ko ang paghalik at inilapat ang mga kamay sa magkabilang pisngi niya.
Idinikit ko ang noo sa noo niya at saglit na kinagat ang ibabang labi ko bago nagsalita. "I'm happy."
Lumabas ang nag-iisang dimple sa pisngi ni Luke Dashiel na laging nagpapahina sa akin. Naglaho ang ngiti niya nang inilapat niya ang mga labi sa akin. He kissed me with the same passion, slower this time. He was the first one to deepen the kiss by inserting his tongue and clashing it with my own in my mouth. He was taking the lead and I'm more than willing to let him.
We managed to switch positions without separating our lips. He was now on top and he was pressing his hard member against me. Luke Dashiel once again placed his mouth on my neck, gritting some skin between his teeth. I moaned and grabbed his waist to push him closer to the part that I want him the most.
"Luke Dashiel... In me... Now. Please..." I breathed out. He was doing the things that I've taught him earlier. He brushed his palm against my chest, then to my stomach. He hooked my bikini bottom with his fingers to remove it before throwing it somewhere in the room.
I was now naked at his mercy. Luke Dashiel froze on top of me. I opened my eyes to look at him and saw him intently observing me with his fiery and dark eyes. The way he looked at me was so intense and careful that I could almost feel it touching my skin.
"I'm dying here," I croaked.
Luke Dashiel sharply took a breath. He pulled himself up and kissed me on the lips. "You're so perfect, Avis. Fuck."
I giggled at his reaction. "Alright, get in me now."
He nodded, removing his shorts and boxer brief in a one swift motion. I placed my hands at the back of his head once again and brought his face to mine and taste his lips once again. I think I'm addicted. I could never get tired of kissing Luke Dashiel.
The heavy tension was building up between us again. Luke Dashiel's hands were all over my body while my brain's all over the place. I couldn't think of anything but this moment and every detailed part of it. Like the way his chest was brushing on my breasts as he kissed me, like how Luke Dashiel groans whenever I pull his hair. Everything was vivid and delineated.
I reached for his thick length and squeezed it on my hand, giving it a long and hard stroke. That earned me a loud feral groan from Luke Dashiel. Hearing him react with everything that I do to him arouses me completely.
Luke Dashiel positioned himself on my core. I kept staring at his face, waiting for him to bring his eyes on mine. My lips parted when I felt the tip of his member sliding inside me. He hissed as he slowly pushed himself in. A cry tumbled from my lips in pain. Luke Dashiel froze, worry etched on his face as he looked at me. His eyes were searching my face. "Are you okay?"
I bit my lip, still refusing to close my eyes. I nodded at him. "Deeper, Luke Dashiel."
He didn't say anything but did what I wanted him. I cried again. I was ready but it doesn't change the fact that it's been so long and that I'm tight.
Mabagal ang kilos ni Luke Dashiel. Alam kong nag-iingat siya dahil ayaw niyang saktan ako. Pero lalo lang akong nasasaktan sa sobrang frustration dahil gusto ko na siyang maramdaman sa loob ko. I held his back and pushed him in me hard and fast. My inner muscles clenched around him.
Luke Dashiel growled while I groan in both pleasure and pain. His lips found mine, tasting and sucking. He's trying to distract me from the pain. Seconds later, I felt Luke Dashiel's hips moving. I gasped at the building pleasure inside me.
He started slow, his movement was measured and careful. Then pace of his thrusts became normal. I clawed Luke Dashiel's back as I stared back at him. His eyes that were darkening every second never left mine.
"Fuck..." he groaned as he plunged in me deeper and harder every passing time. I moaned his name out loud and he caught it with a kiss. I met his every thrusts, raising my hips in synchronize with his.
"Faster, please... Ohh." I plead.
Another curse flew from his mouth. His body slamming against me with precision and a lot faster than former. My head thrashed as I felt it. I was going to come. I'm damn close, so fucking close. My lips parted as I let my moans take over the room and mix with his groans.
Luke Dashiel reached for my breast and pressed it hard, tweaking my nipple with his two fingers. I exploded. My eyes were shut close and I'm seeing stars. My head was spinning with pleasure and bliss. Luke Dashiel thrusts in me one last time, hard and slow and then his body shook as he filled me with his seeds.
His body dropped on top of mine and I was weak too. My blood flowing inside my body was ringing in my ear, our ragged breaths are the only noise in the room. Luke Dashiel kissed me on my ear and whispered. "I'm ruined. You ruined me for anyone else, Avis."