LXVIII. leehaechan┊𝙽𝙲𝚃 .
────❝[ time for a break ]
Onyourm__rk
Hi Jia
02:56
Oh.. hey Mark
I really don't want to stress you yk..
Especially because it's so late right now
Uhhh okay....
I'm scared
It's Donghyuck
He's like... Man idek, I guess you can say
he got scolded by the instructor and he didn't take it well..
I can tell he's hurting and his eye bags are worse than ever
I know he won't open up to us, I mean maybe me?
But you know him, he feels like a burden to everyone..
Maybe you could talk to him?
Oh gosh
Does he seem okay?
I'm omw right now
These past couple days he's seemed a lot more dull,
And way more tired than usual
I don't think he's sleeping proper hours
The fact that we don't have roommates anymore makes
Everything worse
I'll be there really soon
Thank you for telling me
Ofc
Lmk if he's okay because we're all super worried for him
But we don't want to invade his privacy
Yeah of course, I'll text you later :)
˖ ̨𖥔 ִ ་
She practically rushed into the house after the news. Of course she drove safely, maybe a little fast, but safe. As soon as she pulled up she ran up the stairs, not even caring to wait for the elevator.
She was so worried about Donghyuck, she wanted to see him as soon as possible.
It was nearly 3 am, she wasn't sure if he went to bed yet, but even if he did, she was planning on sitting there with him until he woke up, making sure he's okay, talking to him, letting him let everything out.
All the members seemed to be in their own separate rooms since the living room was empty, lights were off and doors were closed. It was late anyways, most of them were probably trying to sleep.
She ran up the stairs to Donghyuck's room, the hallway dark. Not even a little sound to be heard.
She was scared, she didn't know what would happen when she opened the door, all she hoped was that he was okay, and he wasn't hurt.
She slowly opened his room door, the room also pitched black, curtains open nonetheless, the only thing lighting up the room was the shining moon.
Donghyuck was sat on his gaming chair, facing his bed, his knees up on the chair and his head in his knees, small sobs could be heard from him. Her heart shattered into a million pieces. His broken sobs broke her heart.
He didn't seem to notice her until he felt a warm comforting hand on his upper back, raising his head slightly. She almost missed the way his eyes were red, his face puffy with warm salty tears flowing down his face with no intention to stop.
Seeing Donghyuck like this genuinely hurt her.
"It's okay... you can cry... I'm here for you." She whispered endearing words, to make him feel a little better. To help him open up, to let him know she was there for him.
She softly grabbed his hand, holding it tightly. Gently pulling him up to the bed.
She sat down first, letting him sit down after her, his head falling in the crook of her neck, his arms wrapping around her neck.
His cries never halted, there seemed to be so much bothering him, so much that he hid, so much pain that he had to carry on his back himself. She couldn't imagine how hard it was for him, to have everything bottled up inside him, reaching his breaking point.
She rubbed his back gently back and forth, whispering warm and touching words to calm him down, his body practically shivering in her hold.
It took quite a while for him to calm down. His sobs slowly stopped although his tears didn't dare.
Her gentle hold and comforting words helped him calm down, his cries slowly turned into heavy breathing, as small tiny tears fell down his cheeks.
"You don't have to open up to me unless you're ready.. but I want you to know I'm always here." She continued to rub his back, despite his sobs stopping, she allowed him to stay there in her warm embrace, comforting him more.
"I-..."
"There's just so much...." He managed to get out, his body slowly growing tired, his puffy face starting to swell from all the tears.
"That's okay... if you want to tell me later that's alright."
"To he honest.. all I want to do is sleep."
"Then let's sleep." She smiled, helping him properly lay down in the bed. She closed the curtains so that the morning sun didn't disrupt him.
She locked the door before joining him in the bed, his body immediately clinging to hers as his head stayed resting right on her chest, slowly slowly falling into slumber while listening to the girls heartbeats.
˖ ̨𖥔 ִ ་
The amount of times Donghyuck woke up during the night drove him nearly insane. There was always a problem, either he needed the bathroom, or he felt too hungry to sleep, or he'd developed a headache from how much he kept waking up, the world just seemed to not be on his side.
When he finally found himself falling back asleep for good, was when Jia woke up. Around seven in the morning.
She was confused if Donghyuck had schedules and or if he was even going to go if he did since he was sleep on the girls chest.
Although it was morning his room definitely didn't show that since his room was still pitch black, his curtains closed and door locked.
Her bright phone almost blinded her before she turned it down, opening her and Mark's dm's to ask him about her confusions.
Onyourm__rk
Hi mark
Sorry for the sudden text but I have a question😭
Should I be waking Donghyuck up for schedulesss??
Oh no it's okay
We don't have any schedules today
Is he sleeping well?
How is he?
Oh okay, he's sleeping pretty well right now
He... he cried, a lot
I don't even know what he was crying about
He didn't tell me.. he said he'd tell me later
By the way he was crying I think it was definitely more
than just the instructor's words
Probably..
Take good care of him please
I don't know what made him so upset but
We really are extremely worried about him
Yeah okay
I'll update u later
Okay thank you
Donghyuck stayed asleep for a couple more hours, really taking advantage of the sleep that he missed out all night.
Jia did end up getting up and getting ready for the day, eating breakfast and changing before hopping back into bed where Donghyuck was still sleeping.
Unconsciously in his sleep he shifted closer towards her, nearly knocking her phone out of her hand while reclaiming his spot back on her chest, making her chuckle slightly. Her hand reaching up to caress his face softly.
They stayed like that for another hour before Donghyuck's breathing calmed down, evening to a more quiet and steady pace, and his body shifted, stretching his strained and sore muscles.
Her eyes immediately dashed to his face once he was woken up, his face puffy from all the crying he did last night, tired flashed all over his face.
He laid there for a while, zoning out while staring at the very familiar things in his room, the topic of yesterday still lingering in his mind. He didn't want to talk about it nor think about it, he wanted to shut it out from his mind completely, he wanted to just forget about it and move on.
He didn't want to open up, he was afraid. He didn't want to talk about his feelings, he was scared and awkward.
He wasn't used to this opening up thing. He knew it came with the relationship, to share your feelings and grow past it together, but he just never experienced it, feeling uncomfortable by just the thought.
So as he laid on the girl, he knew she was waiting for the right time to ask him about what happened, and he wasn't upset about it. If he walked into her just crying like that, and didn't tell him a thing he knew he would be equally as worried, or maybe even more.
"Good morning." He started off, moving closer to her, still sleepy. Cuddling more into her neck. He moved to lay on his stomach, his arms wrapped around her waist as he tiredly kissed the skin at her lower neck gently.
"Are you going back to sleep?" She asked, rubbing the soft skin of his back due to his shirt rolling up. "No, although I'm still tired." He closed his eyes, more to rest them than to fall asleep.
"Hmm.. okay." Her hand moved to his head, massaging his scalp softly, he swore if he didn't feel bad for sleeping so much, he would've fell asleep right there again. The feeling so comforting and gentle.
"Our roles are like reversed." He chuckled, usually it was Jia who was lying on Donghyuck. But for the last few days the roles seemed to be reversed between the two. "I like it better this way though." She kissed the top of his head, his clean lavender scented strands brushing against her face.
"About yesterday— I'll tell you now."
"If you're not ready.. I'm not pressuring you to say anything."
"No it's okay, I want to tell you." He reassured her, continuing on with his explanation. "I guess there's just a lot going on... I seem to be 'holding my group back from their full potential.' And my group apparently would do way better without me. With this whole public relationship too, our name seems to be dragged so easily.
There's so much more hate, and it's all people who are just jealous of our relationship. There's not many nice comments, and ever since we announced our relationship they've been picking on everything and anything about me, it's so tiring.
Last night was the best I've slept in months, since the dream show started I haven't had proper rest, my schedule is so packed I barely even have time to even call my mother anymore. I'm so tired, if I knew life would be this hard ten years ago, being an idol would never be the path I chose."
He sighed, almost feeling the tears resurface back to his eyes. If it wasn't for the fact that he didn't like being so vulnerable around people he would've been seconds away from bawling again.
"And as much as I love being able to flex having a beautiful and caring girlfriend all over social media, it seems like nobody else does, because as soon as we show any time of public care for each other, we're the 'untalented' 'annoying' 'obnoxious' couple."
"I feel so out of touch with everyone, I feel like my whole life has become work. I don't even feel like Donghyuck anymore, I'm just Haechan now. I haven't talked to my family in ages, and let's not talk about the last time I actually seen them. It's been months.
I don't feel like myself anymore. It's so hard putting up a fake persona for social media, like I'm not that 'always happy member' that everyone puts me out to be, I'm a human being and just like everyone I have my ups and downs, but for some reason the second I show any sign of being 'down' I'm the problem."
Donghyuck seemed to be finished speaking as he didn't continue on again, the whole topic seemed to ruin his mood all over again.
"I'm sorry.. this is all because of our relationship.. you were always so worried, and so quick to defend me when I was feeling down but I didn't even bother asking you."
"No it's not you, it's the media, they're strict and hard to please. Yes the hate will die down with time but it'll never stop. In a way I feel like I let them down, because I went from someone they looked up to, to someone they're disappointed in.."
"But the media is never ever going to be pleased, they'll find something that they hate about you, there's no way you can 100% please them."
"Exactly— and my job is a job where I have to, and if I can't even please my dance instructor at practise, how will I be able to please them?"
"That shouldn't be your concern, if they don't like what you're willing to give them, then simply fuck them."
"That sounds really wrong." He chuckled, causing her to really lightly hit his head, "we're talking seriously right now dummy." She rolled her eyes at his nonstop playfulness.
"But anyways, it's not that easy to 'not give a fuck' when your whole career depends on if they like what you're willing to give or not, and with our relationship, they seemed to really not like anything about me anymore."
"What are you indicating?"
"I'm not indicating anything, I'm just saying that we knew it was going to be hard, but I think we revealed it too early. My schedule is packed for this upcoming comeback, and we want the fans to like it, but with the publicity of our relationship they might just hate for no reason."
"But— that's nothing we can control so I guess I'm just overreacting to everything."
"I'm sorry you have to go through this, it's way harder for you than it is for me, I wish we could just take everything back." She sighed, feeling so extremely bad for the boy.
"It's fine.. we knew it would be hard, and we knew that this would happen, we just have to fight through it, together." He leaned up to place a kiss on her cheek, going back to his original position.
"I love you.." she rubbed the warm skin of his back, under his shirt. The hotness feeling nice on the palm of her hand. "I love you too Angel."
˖ ̨𖥔 ִ ་
JJJIMM
I think I'm overthinking but
I think me and Donghyuck should.. go on a break
hwajung.kang: girl WHAT???
park.soul: JIA TF R U TALKING ABOUT?
seo.minnie: what happened to JIHYUCK????
eezul: what the fuck
Idk he's so stressed right now,
And our relationship being public is the biggest part
about it..
I'm not saying we should break up, never
but I'm saying maybe a break would help him a bit.
They're having a comeback soon, like maybe until
The end of their comeback week yk..
gyeom.minjee: that's like almost two months from now..
eezul: Jia are you really doing this.. think about it
hwajung.kang: don't you think it'll make it harder for him?
How so..??
park.soul: because who will he have to talk to?
gyeom.minjee: we all know Donghyuck, that boy does not
open up, to anyone. Only you or mark
Exactly, he'll have mark
I just— don't want to take away from his full ability
They way he was yesterday,
guys it genuinely shattered my heart.
I think it's best if we do, just so that he can have a little
break, and focus on having his full potential this comeback
hwajung.kang: so is it my turn?
Junghwa not the time
I'm in a relationship & u need to be a bit more respectful
about it
hwajung.kang: it's just a joke, chill
eezul: Junghwa just stop rn
gyeom.minjee: I mean.. you know what's best for your relationship
park.soul: if you think he needs it, by all means do it
I think I might
It will be the worst month or two ever tho
eezul: my parents r breaking up :c
Ur my brothers gf stfu
park.soul: we will miss Jihyuck 😔
I will too
˖ ̨𖥔 ִ ་
notification center
[ [ imessage ] my angel ❤️ ]
[ Hyuck.. I think we should go on break.. ]
"What the fuck.."
˖ ̨𖥔 ִ ་
Um hi!!!!! It's yeona🥰
Let me not beat around the bush uh, hey!! It's been... a while but IM BACK I SWEAR.
Consistent Yeona is COMINGGG !!!!