" Don't get to close, I fear I might show you the fear behind my eyes and then I'll have to see the pain behind yours" ~ Laughing Wolf
Powerful hands beat with a steady pounding rhythm against a black heavy weight sand bag. Sweat runs down a blonde hero's face and bare chest while music floods his ears through his earbuds.
It had been a few days since Katsuki's run in with Izuku and that no good shit who he's dating. He's been moody ever since, nightmares and lack of sleep not helping the situation.
Dating.. the word throbs in Katsuki head like a migraine that bangs around inside his temples making him feel sick and uneasy.
He was foolish to think Izuku wouldn't move on the way that he hadn't in two years. He should have known someone would try to take his place next to the greenett who had so much to offer you needed an entire notebook like the ones that nerd scribbled in to list everything. Izuku had always been perfect in his eyes even when he acted otherwise, it was only a matter of time before someone else knew and acted on that.
He shouldn't be angry, shouldn't be hurt or bitter, after all he's the one who broke things off in the state he was in and walked away for two years without a word.
Yet he is all of those things. All of things that twist inside his chest daily causing a storm to brew.
His mind shifts suddenly, thinking about that boy wonder fuck off that Izuku is hooked up with. He doesn't like him, of course he doesn't, he hates his very existence, hates the air he breathes and if he's being honest he'd love to set that air on fire with a mix of nitroglycerin and fire blast then shove it down his throat till his lungs implode. He loathes him, his face, his voice, his presence. Hate isn't a word to be thrown around lightly but Katsuki knows beyond the shadow of a doubt that he hates him.
Heavy hands wrapped with workout tape begin to pound and wail against the black punching bag hanging from his ceiling even harder as these thoughts shift and churn in his mind.
A racing mind then shifts to the other day at lunch and a shitty boy wonder who was being pushy with Izuku, telling him where to sit, what to eat, what not to drink like he had the right to. This little bitch sat there and tried to tell that green-eyed hero what he would be doing at work and then after.
Exhausted green eyes flash in Katsuki's mind as he punishes the weighted bag with heated hands and hefty punches.
He sees him, sees the tired greenett walk carelessly out into traffic. He can hear the horn blare in his mind, sees himself lunge forward gripping a green hero suit just in time to snatch him back into his arms before impact could be made. He can see those tired eyes that looked up at him in surprise but relief, an apology on his tongue. Telling Katsuki he was sorry, sorry for the scare, for the trouble but that he was just so tired.
Punches are getting harder, tape wrapped around strong hands starting to warp and burn under the heat rising beneath it.
A question begins to bang around in an already overworked mind.
Why, why was that nerd so damn tired, and why the fuck didn't that bastard he was with notice? Or did he just not give a fuck?
A different sight flashes now in an anger-filled mind. He sees that fuck-boy wonder come back after the damage was almost done, asking Izuku what happened, which he should have known if he had stayed beside him, but he rushed off ahead leaving Izuku open to danger something that's making hatred burn in crimson eyes.
One last slam into the black bag causes it to tear open spilling sand across his bedroom floor.
He steps back panting heavy as he wipes the sweat from his forehead cursing at the mess he made not even realizing how angry he was getting.
Crimson eyes shift to the clock as he wipes down the sweat from his neck and face seeing that he has a patrol shift to get ready for. He has an evening patrol tonight one he needs to get ready for.
After a shower and a clean up of sand he's at the agency finishing up getting his hero suit on.
Behind him a monotone voice is heard.
" So, I guess it's you and me tonight Bakugo."
Katsuki turns around as he adjust the belt on his hero suit to see Shoto standing there waiting with just a hint of a smile on a mostly unemotional face.
The blonde smirks rolling his eyes.
" Great, they put me with your weird ass today?"
Shoto nods, that slight smile growing.
" Right. I missed you too, let's go."
The blonde shakes his head with amusement as they head out on evening patrol.
They walk the streets in silence at first keeping an eye on things before Shoto beings to make conversation.
" You find an apartment yet? I'm sure you'll be ready to live on your own again."
The blonde hero nods.
" Yeah actually, found something just yesterday. Place will be ready to move into this weekend. Definitely ready to get out from under the Hag, damn I forgot how annoying she was."
Shoto chuckles slightly.
" She probably thinks the same thing about you."
The blonde looks over at the bicolored eyed male with a raised brow then a slow smirk forms.
" Damn Icyhot, I didn't think you had it in you. I'm a little fucking proud right now, shit."
Shoto laughs lightly.
" Thanks, I'll try and keep up with your insults tonight so I don't fall behind."
The blonde breaks into a laugh.
" About time your expressionless ass got a sense of humor.".
They both laugh slightly until crimson eyes land on a slight that makes every muscle tense under his skin. When Shoto smells nitroglycerin his own sights search for what the trigger is but when he sees his best friend and Ethan walking on patrol together on the other side of the street he doesn't need to look much further.
He glances at the blonde who's jaw is clenched tightly with dangerous eyes locked on. He sighs putting his hand on Katsuki's shoulder.
" Sorry. I'm sure that's difficult for you."
The blonde meets his eye briefly as they keep moving on their route.
" Yeah, you have no damn idea."
There's a beat of silence before Katsuki speaks his mind.
" Oi, Icyhot, you're Deku's best friend, what do you think of that fuck face he's hooked up with?"
Shoto keeps his eyes ahead, a slight smile on his lips.
" You mean Dash?"
Katsuki shrugs
" Like I said, fuck face."
Shoto chuckles.
" Honestly, I'm not sure. I feel like none of us know him really well. After you left Dash kind of made his presence known but only to Midoriya. At the time Midoriya was so upset over you leaving that he sunk pretty low. I notice Ethan starting to talk to him during that, almost constantly but it seemed forced at times like he was forcing Midoriya to talk to him about it but only him."
Anger begins to twist in Katsuki's chest.
" What do you mean only him?"
Shoto shrugs.
" Like whenever Midoriya's friends, including me would try and help him Ethan would butt in, almost pushing the rest of us out. Anytime we wanted time with him Ethan always claimed they had plans, Midoriya was so worn down from being upset he just went along with it. Sometimes I feel like he's still stuck in that rut. I think Ethan is controlling in a lot of ways but he covers it with displays of over the top niceness."
Katsuki stops walking. Eyes full of anger.
" What the fuck. Have you told Deku you don't trust this guy??"
Shoto meets angry eyes.
" I told him I didn't think they made a good match. But I think Midoriya already knows that. I think he's continued to see him because Dash makes him feel guilty. Once you came home I figured things would eventually work themselves through on their own."
Katsuki raises a brow.
" What's that mean?"
Again there's an ever so slight curve of a smile on serious features.
" Means I want Midoriya to be happy, I think there's only one thing that can make that happen. I don't need to tell you what that is, you already know. Things have to go through a process to get there though and I have a feeling it might get ugly before it gets better but I have no doubt it'll work itself through."
Katsuki studies this male on the sidewalk in front of him taking in everything he just said. He smirks finally a chuckle in his throat that echos through the evening air.
" Geeze Icyhot, for a guy who hardly ever really says anything you just said a hell of a lot didn't you? And am I fucking crazy or are you rooting for me to get back together with Deku?"
Shoto smiles now, one that shows itself as he puts his hands in his pockets and begins to walk again as he answers.
" Like I said, I want Midoriya to be happy, let's go."
The patrol goes on and to Katsuki's surprise he doesn't hate this in fact he's enjoyed talking to this half and half freak more than he thought he would but things take a sudden turn for him that he didn't expect.
The sky suddenly opens and a heavy thunderstorm begins to tear through the sky.
The sound of the thunder crashing mixes with the lightening is making parts of a broken mind flash back to a battlefield two years ago.
Katsuki's heart begins to hammer against his chest while his eyes go wide and sweat breaks out while his core starts to tremble making him unsteady on his feet.
The thunder sounds like the endless explosions of that day and the lightening makes him think of when he was struck down on the field, his eyes were closed but he could see flashes behind them, of green and yellow, Deku had been on the scene somewhere that dreadful day going into full feral mode when he saw Katsuki on the ground. Dunce had also been there, electric in the sky trying to keep the damn city from falling down around them with a force field. It had rained, he remembers because minute's before he lost consciousness he felt it falling on his skin. It cooled the burning but he cursed it in a semi-conscious mind because it would weaken his quirk.
Shoto sees it, he's been calling the blonde's name but he knows Katsuki is buried someplace in his mind that he can't reach. He does his best to lead the shaky blonde into an empty ally away from prying eyes as he tries to assess the situation.
Katsuki looks lost, eyes wide but empty on the outside but Shoto knows there's a war going on behind those eyes. One where he's trying to sort out what's real and what's not.
Bicolored eyes shoot down the ally when he hears a familiar voice. By amazing luck he sees his best friend across the street getting ready to walk into a coffee shop.
He looks at the lost blonde.
" Bakugo, I'll be right back, you're ok, make sure you stay right here."
With that he races from the ally into the rain across the street where he grabs Izuku by the arm before he can fully make it inside.
Green eyes snap to his best friend who's drenched with rain.
" Sho! Come inside and let's get out of the rain till it calms down a little."
He watches Shoto shake his head.
" No, I'm good. I was having a small issue in an area close to here and I'm not having much luck with it. It's a stubborn child and I think it's more in your skill set to handle.", he lies so that Dash won't question it.
Izuku raises a brow with worried eyes.
" A child out in this?! They must be terrified!"
Shoto nods feeling an ache in his chest at the accuracy.
" Yes. He is, he is terrified. I feel you are best suited for this. I will take over your patrol with Dash while you handle it."
Ethan frowns.
" I can help. I'll go with you."
Shoto grips his arm his eyes going cold and serious. There's a trace of anger in a monotone voice.
" No, the child is frightened enough, too many people around are going to make the situation worse. Midoriya has a soft way when it comes to things like this, he can handle it on his own. I will patrol with you until the situation is resolved."
Izuku nods.
" Yes, he's right. I will go right away. Just give me the coordinates."
" Sure, come here and I'll point you in the right direction."
As soon as Izuku is out of ear shot of Dash Shoto quickly tells him where the issue is but just as Izuku is getting ready to fire up his quirk to race in the direction Shoto leans into his ear and whispers something that causes wide green eyes.
" It's Bakugo. Hurry."
Not a minute more is wasted before Izuku darts to the location with his heart in his throat.
As soon as he hits the ally he sees a sight that makes tears fall immediately.
Katsuki is crouched down against the wall, his hands over his ears and his head down. Blonde spikes are dripping with rain water and a black and orange hero suit is soaked. He's shaking something Izuku can see from where he stands. He begins to approach him, slowly even though his feet beg to run to the broken hero.
He begins to speak softly praying the words reach their target against the rain and war inside a blonde hero's mind.
" K-Kacchan. It's Deku. Can you hear me? I'm here with you, you... you aren't alone."
He doesn't get a response only watches Katsuki begin to rock back and forth eyes closed, hands still clamped over his ears.
He's in front of him now, tears falling from emerald eyes as well as rain water down fair cheeks. He drops down slowly, kneeling in the wet ally as he reaches out slowly with a trembling hand.
" Kacchan. Please, please open your eyes. It's ok, I.. I promise. You aren't alone. I don't know what you're seeing but.. but it's not real. Kacchan.. please, please open your eyes and see me. See that this is just a storm."
As soon as Izuku hand touches Katsuki's arm with a firm grip crimson eyes snap open and sharp reflexes immediately push the greenett back knocking him back off his knees.
Katsuki is wide-eyed with fear, panting, his heart aching against every beat. He's still blinded by the image's in his mind. A soft voice pushes past trying again.
" Kacchan. Kacchan.. look.. look at me. Really look at me. It's Deku, you're on patrol, this is just a storm. I'm with you, you're.. you're safe. Everything is ok. Kacchan...look at me, focus on my voice and look at me."
A cloudy mind slowly begins to clear. A voice he would know anywhere, in any lifetime begins to break through the darkness, pulling him back to the surface of light.
He blinks back rain water, seeing green eyes staring back with fear and worry. Reality slowly starts to take hold as he keeps his eyes on a soaked hero sitting in a puddle in the pouring rain.
" D-Deku?"
Izuku nods with a small sense of relief.
" Yes Kacchan. It's me. Are.. are you ok? Do you need me to do anything for you?"
Katsuki feels a rush of relief but also sheer embarrassment. He gets to his feet slowly taking a step to Izuku as he looks down at him.
The greenett looks up from his spot on the ground, happy Katsuki can't tell he's crying because the rain water masks his truth.
A large hand reaches down, one Izuku takes immediately as he feels a strong grip pull him to his feet.
Crimson and emerald eyes are focused while Izuku stands with his hero gloved hand locked still in an orange and green gloved one.
There's no words yet, just heavy rain water and distant thunder of a storm that's moving away as another kind of storm swirls in two hero's chest.
Katsuki isn't sure what to say, isn't sure how to say it either. He wants to both thank Izuku and run from him, both feelings equally banging against his chest. He fights it and stands his ground even though his legs feel unstable.
There's water down sharp features, both rain and tears that he curses himself for.
Izuku is close to him. Close enough to smell Katsuki's soap and traces of his quirk even in the storm. His heart speeds up a reaction the blonde always pulled with ease.
Both of them are unmoving, locked in some kind of trance feeling as tho the ground might swallow them if they take a step away from each other.
Izuku stares up at him, looking into sharp crimson eyes that a black hero mask is pushed up away from. He studies those eyes that seem to be screaming a million things that Izuku is begging to hear.
Just as the greenett is getting ready to ask if he's ok again Katsuki speaks.
Four words only.
" I hate the rain."
It's whispered, but yet somehow powerful and strong. Izuku struggles to nod because he knows that and the voice used to say those four words feels like it could drop him where he stands. He can feel them against his skin somehow, making him tremble slightly something that Katsuki can feel.
" Y-yes. I .. I know you do. You always did, even as kids you hated it be...because it cools your skin and won't allow you to sweat, so.. so it interferes with your quirk."
The blonde doesn't say anything at first only let's crimson eyes look closely into the large emerald ones looking at him that are hardly blinking.
" Yeah, but my skin doesn't feel so cool right now huh?"
It's husky and molten and seeping into a green-eyed hero's mind making it swirl.
Izuku is caught up, so much that he's hardly aware of his actions as he lifts his other hand that's not in the blonde's grip and reaches for a scarred cheek.
Katsuki quickly turns his face before it reaches its destination making Izuku's heart sink. The blondes eyes shift to two sets of Hero boots standing in a puddle. He shakes his head.
" No, don't do that Deku. For so many reasons don't do that."
A sharp pain hits both chest like an arrow that plunges through them both.
Izuku let's his hand fall away as he slowly retracts the other from the blonde's grip. He takes a step back, tears on his cheeks that he knows are there a cracking voice that he can't hide.
" I.. I should have known you wouldn't let me. I don't really know why I keep trying. You.. you wouldn't even let me hug you after the war. Your.. your heart stopped and...and all I ever wanted to do was hug you so.. so I could hear it beat.. so.. so that I knew .. so that I knew you.. you weren't dead like.. like they told me you were! But.. you.. you wouldn't let me!"
He's not sure why he can't stop himself, he should stop himself but his heart is pouring all over the wet ally like sand slipping through his fingers.
Katsuki watches the breakdown, sees the pain and anger at the surface. He's frozen letting the words hit him like daggers because some part of him knows he deserves this.
He's unmoving until he sees Izuku get frustrated with his own emotions and Katsuki's lack of words. Unmoving until he sees pain-filled green eyes turn away from him and start to walk away.
He reaches out swiftly gripping Izuku's arm, spinning him back around and pulling him hard to his chest. Strong arms engulf the smaller male, a large hand is placed on the back of wet green curls as he pulls his head to his chest over his heart and holds him there.
Izuku goes wide-eyed at the suddenness of the action. Then he hears it, hears it against the rain, against his tears, against a strong chest, he hears a sound he's waited to hear for two years, the steady hard beat of Katsuki's heart. He breaks into a sob, throwing his arms around the blonde, clinging to a wet hero suit with his ear to the sound he can feel against his face.
Katsuki holds him there, in a wet ally, rain coming down in buckets over them both. He doesn't dare move, wouldn't dare try, instead he lets a tear slide from his eye falling into soaked green locks.
Izuku listens, listens to each thumping beat that he doesn't realize beats his name and only his. He closes his eyes cold from rain but warm from arms that have the power to both heal and break him.
He's lost, completely and if he could he'd stay like this forever but reality strikes them both down hard when Izuku's hero raido on his belt crackles to life with a voice Katsuki loathes with all his being.
" Izuku? It's Dash. You been out there a long time. I see your location on the radar, I'm headed in your direction."
Izuku quickly looks up meeting crimson eyes that look both hurt and pissed off.
He stays in Katsuki's embrace as he speaks.
" Kacchan.. I'm.. I'm sorry."
Katsuki forces a weak smile.
" It's alright Deku. Go on, I'm in no mood for boy wonder, if you don't want his dead body laying in this ally you better go. I'll see you later."
As soon as Katsuki releases him Izuku hates it so does a blonde hero who doesn't admit it.
The greenett begins to walk away slowly but then he hears a voice behind him in the rain.
" Oi, don't forget you owe me lunch this week Deku. I'm holding you to it. I'm on night's all this week, find me."
With that he's gone but the feel of him is lingering on a soaked green hero suit.
A/N
Oi...I loved this chapter
Our tale continues