A/N ~ Thank you so much for the votes, comments and thanks for reading. I hope you guys liked the story so far... Alan has been so so so cold right? I guess its time to see him smile?
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The next day, there wasnt a single sight of a journalist in front of the hospital.
It looks like the fuss about Pit Babe has finally calmed down.
Thats a relief. Yesterday I wasnt sure of what would happen.
"Good morning."
I say hello to everybody and am about to continue on my way as usual.
"Dr Jeff. Good morning," Nurse Sonic greeted with a big smile. "Did you get home safely yesterday?"
"Yeah and thanks again. I'm happy to see that the press is no longer here."
"Well, you know what they say, out of the frying pan and into the fire."
"Did something happened?"I asked curiously.
After you left. A man came saying that he was a fan of Pit Babe. He made it all the way here to the nurses station."
"What?"
"That's not all. The guy saw Alan speaking to Pit Babe and went beserk. So he grabbed Dr Alan and said stuff like 'Are you seeing my boyfriend?'"
Wow, that was all yesterday...
Well I suppose that's what happens when the Director tries to turn the hospital into a name brand by calling in celebrities.
"Eventually, Dr Alan ended up with an injury,"he said in regret.
I was shocked and panicked. Alan's injured?
"He was? How badly?"
"I dont know....he says that he's fine but there was a lot of blood on his right hand."
But he's right handed.
Alan... He's not here in the office. I suppose it would be a good time to take a day off.
Way is on the phone. I approach him after waiting for him to put the receiver down.
"I heard that Alan is injured.,,"
Way looked sad at the mention of him.
"Yes, I examined him."
"Is it bad?"
He pinched the bridge of his nose."Luckily there was nothing to worry about, no damage to the nerves."
I felt relieved. He wasnt hurt too badly.
"Oh good."
"Still he needs some time to rest. It was his right hand. We have to rescheduled his upcoming operation.."
Representative Bank Thanatip is scheduled to come in tomorrow."
"That's right and he's arriving at the hospital this evening. We made a call to Dr Pop but he's been away visiting his family. He's been asked to come as fast as he can."
Pop....I heard that name, he's always acted as Alan's first assistant during an operation.
"I'm going to talk to the Director but if the Representative can be persuaded, it is likely that Dr Pop will take place of Alan during the operation."
"Why not you?"I asked.
"Unfortunately I have a conference to attend in US. My flight leaves tomorrow morning."
"I see."
"Regardless, you'll be there. We'll continue with the preparations with that in mind."
"Okay. By the way is Dr Alan out today?"
Way face turns to angry. "That man is totally ridiculous. You know I told him to stay at home but he said there was plenty of things he could do outside of the actual operating. He wouldn't listen to what I had to say."
That sounds like Alan all right.
"If you see him, please encourage him to take some rest."
"I will."
There is no reason for him to work himself like this when he has an injury. He cant operate for a while, maybe he
feels responsible for putting himself out of commission..
As I make my rounds, I quietly keep an eye out for Alan.
Where could he be?
Maybe he's tired and fell asleep.
He's not in the room either.
I suddenly remember him standing alone in the stairwell out of the back door.
I wonder.......
*Creak...*
I opened the rusted door.
I smell cigarette smoke....
I look up at the stairs. Alan is there.
I was right!
Maybe I shouldnt intrude...
I resist calling out to him.
But Alan can perceive my presence and looks toward me.
"You again..."
"That should be my line. You're out here again."
I climb up the steps to stand by him.
"You come here often?"
"I can smoke here anytime I like,"he said coldly.
"There's a smoking area closer to our floor,"I pointed out.
"Too many people."
"You really dont like being around too many people huh?"
He didnt respond.
"Is this place like your own private hideaway?"
"I dont know."
With some difficulty, Alan puts out the cigarette with his left hand.
Its painful to look at the bandage at his right hand.
"How's your hand?"
"Fine."
"Everybody's worried about you. You should have taken the time off, even if its just for today. I.."
He cuts me off."'There's no time for that. Mr Bank.Thanatip's coming in tonight."
I couldnt help but worry.
"That's true but...Is everything to go according to the plan?"
"What do you mean?"
"Mr Lee. He's coming in tomorrow because he wants you to be his surgeon right, but if you cant operate...."
"I will be present at the surgery of coz, there shouldnt be a problem."
I didnt respond to that.
"Not confident?"he asked suddenly.
"Its not that...I heard that Dr Pop will take your place. Way told me."
"Isnt Pop with his family?"
"Apparently they called him back."
"Oh..."
He looked at me."You should perform the operation."
"Me?"
"I'lll talk to the Director."
"Um..but."
"Its not an easy operation that we can just summon Poo out of nowhere and expect him to do it,"he explained.
"Perhaps but..."
"If you understand what I'm saying, there's only one thing to say."
Alan walks away ending his speech just like that.
"Hey wait..!"
What is this? I cant operate in place of Alan...
Oh well, I doubt the Director would never let me be the surgeon on such an important operation.
Alan sits down on the steps and lets out a deep breath.
I get it though.....There is something relaxing about this place... Alan's secret hideway.
I'm the only one who knows about it. Alan's secert place..........
"Dr Jeff, perfect timing,"Nurse Tul said.
"What is it?"
'The timing of Representative Bank Thanatip's arrival has been decided. Here's the schedule for his examination and the operation."
Nurse Tul handed me a printed schedule.
'Jeff Thanapon' is written under the word 'Surgeon'.
"This........."
"You should be proud of yourself ....that Dr Alan designated you as the operating surgeon. Good luck tomorrow."
"When you say he designated me...does the Director know about this?"
"He's given his approval," Alan said, appearing out of nowhere.
"Dr Alan...."
I cant believe this. I never thought the Director would give the OK.
"What about Representative Bank Thanatip? Have you persuaded him as well?"
"I'll explain the circumstances. Come with me when he arrives."
Impossible.
"'You'll be busy once he's here. Now's your last chance to review the operation."
Alan and I reviewed the operation many times over.
"All set right?"
I didnt reply. Everything is like a sudden.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing."
Theres' no turning back now.
Is it really ok for me to be doing this?
"You all right?"
I nodded.
Actually no........
Yet if I can pull this off, I will gain the trust of both Director and his son.
And opportunities for revenge will open up more to me.
I have to do this!
I forced a smile.
Alan stares at me.
"Jeff...."
"Yes?"
He's about to say something when...........
*knock knock*
"Dr Alan, Dr Jeff, the patient has arrived."
"Thanks, let's go."
What was he going to say.
"Dr Alan wont be performing the operstion? What are you talking about?"Mr Bank demanded unhappily.
Alan bowed. "I am sorry but I suffered an injury, "he explained.
Mr Bank is still not satisfied. "You're supposed to be my surgeon, what is going on?"
"I'm sorry."
"Enough, I dont need to hear it! I'm not ging to have the surgery here if you're not the surgeon!"
I knew this would happen.
"Delaying the operation will only put you to a greater risk,"Alan explained in a matter of factly tone. "We should operate now."
Mr Bank hesitated. "But you say that the you arent doing the operation. I dont want any other."
He doesnt trust me...thats fair..
"He is our finest surgeon. I personally guarantee it."
Alan......... me. he....he totally surprises
"I would never entrust any of my patient to a person I didnt trust."
He got me again.
Mr Bank fixes his eyes on my face like a hawk.
After some time, he said okay.
"Your name Jeff, wasnt it?"
"Yes, sir."
"If he's going to go that far, you can cut me up."
I smile as best I can. "Leave it to me."
"I'll support him to the best of my ability."Alan adds.
"Thank you,"Mr Bank said.
We both left the room and walk together. Saying those things to Mr Bank...
"Patients can feel their doctor's anxiety," he said suddenly.
I look to his handsome but no cold face.
"Be nervous if you want but dont make the patient nervous!"
Ugh...Caught again...
"I'm sorry."
His voice toned down. "You have the procedure down perfectly. There shouldnt be any problems."
"I know but...to think that I'm fit as your substitute."
He look angry again.
"You're not a substitute, This is your operation."
"Dr Alan.."
"Just do what you always do. No more buts and I've already told you that I trust you. Its not a lie. You can do it."
I nod.
The next day...
Alan's instructions were precise and I completed the operation without a hitch.
All my anxieties melts away as soon as I leave the operating room.
I lower myself to the floor.
What a relief. I did it.
"You okay?"
I didnt have to look up to know who is asking me that.
"I am."
I hasten to stand up and Alan hold out his hand to me.
I took hold of his hand and stand up.
"You were amazing,"he praised.
I shake my head in denial."I owe it to your precise instructions."
"It was your skill that accomplished it."
He smiles at me. "I'm glad I believed in you."
Oh god, Alan smiles at me.
He has such a gorgeous smile. He has dimples...He look so handsome and yet sweet.
I desperately suppress the feeling of happiness welling up in me as I watch Alan's back shrink into the distance.
"I can see hearts practically popping out of your eyes...."
Who..?
Startled, I turn to the side.
I hadnt noticed that Benz had come to stand beside me.
Why are you always up here?"
Benz looked hurt. "You say always like I am some kind of a stalker. I'll have you know that the Department Of Internal Medicine is at the far end of this floor."
"Ah..I see."
That explains why we're always meeting like this.
"Looks like things are going well with you and Alan eh..."
"Um. Yeah.."
"Before you were like 'He's so cold' but I guess I dont stand a chance after all. Men..pfft..."
"What are you talking about? Crazy."
He smiled sheepily. "Oh really? You looked happy just now when you're looking at Alan."
Did...did I really look that happy?
He chuckles, "See? I was right."
"Maybe I did look happy. But its not like what you thought it was."
"So, why then?"
"Well....its a secret!"
"Why so mysterious? Not fun at all."
"I was kidding. Its work related actually."
Of course, its really work related, I have finally gained Alan's trust.
Means more chances to get close to Tony.
"You're boring."
The boredom shows in Benz's face and he leaves.
My quicken heartbeat finally calms down...
I am only here for revenge and I should not be interested in anything else.
Several days later...
Alan and I were called in by the chief surgeon.
What could this be about?
It always feels like the chief surgeon's position is effectively held by Way.
He seems so full of energy with Way away at the conference.
It must be difficult for him but since Tony likes Way, the poor guy cant say anything.
"I called you both in because I had no other choice, There's an operation I'd like you two to perform."
We both listened.
"To tell you the truth, the patient originally requested the operation be performed be performed by the Director. However as you are aware, the Director hasnt held a surgiucal knife in some time. So I was assigned the task of handing the case over to a well-suited doctor."
So why didnt the Director just ask his son himself?
The chief surgeon hands us each a copy of a medical chart.
Ratna Supassit, age 44..wait isnt this surgery,
"Its not an especially a difficult operation. But still you will be taking the Director's place as surgeons so I want to play it safe with this one, which is why I am asking the two of you to do it. What do you say?"
Even if he was active as a surgeon, Tony shouldnt be performing this operation.
She's coming in for the same surgery as my mother did.
He told us the same thing back then 'Its not a difficult operation'.
But its the same operation that he performed and resulted in the death of my mother.
"So..."I look at Alan.
But the always calm and composed Alan looked worried, like something is troubling him.
"Could you let me think about it?"
What?
"Dr Alan?"
Its not like to hesitate over performing a surgery.....
"You should do it,"he told me.
"But.."
'It'll be good for you. You can gain experience."
"All right Alan, I will wait for your answer,"the chief said.
"I'm sorry."
Alan bows his head slightly, then leaves.
Why is he responding this way?
Could it be that his father's failure is making him reluctant?
So I will be performing the operation that my mother underwent..
I became a surgeon, so this is inevitable but can I stay calm and get thru this?
"Dr Jeff, Dr Jeff!"Nurse Winner calls out to me. "Are you okay? You seem out of it."
"Sorry I was just thinking of a patient."
This is terrible, I cant stop thinking about the operation.
"You dont think your patient load is too heavy? You've taken on a lot of patients recently. If you push yourself too hard, you'll end up sick yourself," he said concernly.
"You're right but I'm okay. Thanks."
He smiles."All right, I'm going to change the IV bags."
I look at the notes he gave me.
"Okay, thank you."
I return to my desk and look at the huge stack of my patient's medical records.
He's right, I'm handling a lot right now. I need to get organized.
I finish everything only to realize that it was midnight.
When did it get so late?
I stand up to leave.
But Ms Ratna's chart on my desk caught my eye.
My memories of my mother came back.
My hands....they are shaking...
I cant do this after all, What if my feelings take over and I cant save Ms Ratna?
Then I would be............
*creak*
Before I know it, I find myself out at the back entrance.
I look up at the stairwell.
He's not here.
Well, I guess its for the best.
Even if I did find Alan here, what could I possibly say?
I left and started to walk in a daze without any place in mind.
I chanced upon a bar.
There is a bar here near the hospital?
Wow, I never knew.
Maybe a drink will distract me.
I open the door..
"Welcome. One?"the bartender asked.
"Yes,"I replied.
The only customer in the dimly lit bar is a man sitting at the counter.
The bartender seats me three stools away over from him.
As I take my seat, I inadvertently get a look at the other customer.
Alan?
Alan slowly raises his face.