Jaywon AO3 stories :)

Say Dont Go (Jay and Jungwons Version) ; swtblossom

This was sad. But there's a happy and smexy ending!!!
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Say Don't Go (Jay & Jungwon's Version)
swtblossom

Summary:

Jungwon feels hot - both because of his flushed cheeks and because of the sudden panic in his veins. He's pretty sure he feels the same...right? He likes being with Jay; he loves it more than anything. Jay makes him happy. Jay makes him feel safe and loved. Jay is always there for him, through the good and bad. And looking back at how ecstatic he felt whenever he was with the latter, maybe Jungwon realizes that he wants to do more than just hold hands, lean on his shoulder or hug his arm. Maybe he wants to kiss him and go on silly little dates. Maybe he wants to say "I like you too".

But his brain was screaming "ABORT MISSION!" again and again.

His brain was whispering doubt and fear, telling him that one wrong move and it's not just a relationship that would be ending, but also their so-very precious friendship.

And Jungwon couldn't have that, never. His friendship with Jay was the most important thing in his life. How could he risk losing that over romance?
Notes:

So, this is clearly inspired by Taylor Swift's "Say Don't Go", but less angsty and sad heh. I really wanted to explore this dynamic and hope I was able to deliver things well! The summary sucks, but I promise, the plot is probably better (it was pretty cool in my head anyway). Still, I hope you guys like this!

Also, for funsies, since this is a university/college au, I had these majors in mind for the members:
Jungwon - psychology
Heeseung - music
Jay - business management
Jake - fine arts
Sunghoon - film
Sunoo - psychology
Riki - fine arts

Lastly, remember to separate fiction from reality! This story and its characters do not represent their real life counterparts!
(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Say Don't Go - main story

Chapter Text
Flashback, Sophomore Year
"Before you keep fiddling with those Zoom filters, please answer me!" Jungwon whisper-shouted, "Where are we eating lunch?"

Sunoo looked at his friend and casually shrugged with pouted lips, "I don't know honestly. I didn't expect classes to be over so early..."

"Argh, let's just go to the cafe Riki always talks about, then." Jungwon said.

Sunoo was about to open his mouth to reply, but another person's arm suddenly slings around his shoulder. "Hey, Sunoo." the newcomer greeted.

The male nodded in acknowledgment, smiling as he looked up, "Hey. I thought you said you'd have class for the next hour or so?"

"Yeah, but we got dismissed earlier. Wanna talk about the stuff Pres was asking for? Or we could eat lunch first."

Sunoo quickly looked towards Jungwon before returning his gaze to the other male. Chuckling, he replied, "Lunch before student government duties for sure, but I was planning on eating with him," he gestured to his friend before continuing, "so you can join us if you want. That ok, Jungwon?"

Jungwon looked at Sunoo; surely he'd remember that he could be slightly shy with new people, right? He had half the mind to protest, but as he looked towards the newcomer smiling ever so warmly - and charmingly - at him, his heart decided to speak over his brain. "Uh, sure." he ended up saying.

Sunoo smiled brightly, "Ok! So, Jay, this is Jungwon. Jungwon, this is Jay." he pointed at Jay while looking at Jungwon, "We met in the student government since he was assigned to 'mentor' me...you know, 'cause I'm the 'new guy' or whatever."

Jungwon felt small in Jay's piercing and strong gaze; it didn't help that the male was strikingly handsome, effortlessly oozing with a cool and charismatic aura. Why was he staring so intently? Smiling so charmingly? Jungwon cleared his throat and offered a small smile, hoping it was enough to conceal his flustered state. "Hi, nice to meet you." he said.

Jay's smile was more of a smirk, actually. With that lopsided grin, he tilted his head, "Hey, nice to meet you too. Did you know you have really pretty eyes?" he suddenly said.

Jungwon could vaguely hear Sunoo snickering and mumbling something about how Jay was just a really straightforward person, but what he could hear more clearly was his own heartbeat thumping against his chest. "Ah...excuse me?" he clarified.

"You have really pretty eyes." Jay repeated casually with a gentle smile, "They're nice."

"Ah, thank you." Jungwon shyly smiled, bowing his head in a mixture of embarrassment and gratitude.

When Jungwon looked back up, Sunoo was already packing his laptop back in his bag while talking to Jay about what seemed to be student government things. At that moment, Jay laughed at Sunoo's grandiose suggestion for a future event or something. Jungwon wasn't sure.

But he was sure of something else.

Ah, he has such a pretty smile, Jungwon thought to himself.

Present time, Junior Year
The library bustles with indistinct chatter for the first few minutes, but eventually, it subsides as students begin to immerse themselves with studying. Jay, Jungwon, Sunghoon, Jake and Riki sit by one of the tables far off in a quiet corner, absorbed in their own studying. Jake and Riki get into a friendly debate over their research topic with Sunghoon and Jay acting as mediators - or as Jake puts it, "the pillars of logic". Jungwon minds his own business, eyebrows furrowed as he jots down important notes from a movie his professor required them to watch.

While Jake and Riki get fired up with their debate, Sunghoon doesn't bother to mediate, more amused than ever at how serious they were taking things. Jungwon then gives Jay's arm a poke to get his attention. The latter hums in response before leaning towards Jungwon, turning his head to face him.

"Look at this." Jungwon grins before rewinding the movie a few seconds back, then points at the screen when it plays, "Doesn't this scene feel ominous?"

Jay watches intently, observing the way the scene plays out. "Yeah, it kind of does. Why?" he chuckles.

Jungwon looks at his notes, then back at his laptop screen, "There has to be an underlying motive as to why that character is doing this. I have my guesses, but I'm not too sure either."

"Isn't that why you're supposed to finish the whole movie?" Jay teases, looking at Jungwon with a mischievous expression.

Jungwon (cutely) glares at the male before rolling his eyes in an attempt to seem annoyed. The tiny lift on the corner of his lips says otherwise though. "Obviously, I know that." he says, "I just wanted to see if viewers would notice if there would be any 'warning signs' that would foreshadow things to come. It would be nice to add that to my essay."

Jay hums, resting his arm on the backrest of the chair Jungwon was sitting on. He reaches over the laptop's touchpad to rewind a few more minutes back, sharp eyes watching the scene intently. As Jay does so, Jungwon's gaze switches between gauging Jay's reaction and the actual movie. He eventually settles with watching Jay's reaction.

A few minutes later, Jay pauses the movie before turning to Jungwon. "I think...what this character says at this moment," he goes to a particular timestamp before continuing, "is pretty telling already. I think that gives a clear reason behind his actions, even before they reveal it at the end."

Jungwon looks at his friend in awe, eyes sparkling with wonder as he nods. "So, would you say that it justifies his actions? Does the end justify the means?" Jungwon asks.

"You're the psychology major, not me." Jay shrugs while laughing, "You're just trying to get me to write the gist of your essay, aren't you?"

Jungwon laughs, a cheeky grin on his face, "Oh, you caught me. Bummer. I was so close."

The other male laughs. "I'd honestly be willing to if you give me something in exchange." he jokes.

Jungwon scoffs, "Says the guy who's a million times richer than me."

"Rich in knowledge." Jay points out matter-of-factly.

"Lies." Jungwon sticks his tongue out, "That's me."

Jay smirks as he reaches forward, fingers gently pinching Jungwon's cheek. "And here you are, asking for my help."

Jungwon brings his hand up, weakly trying to pry Jay's pinching fingers away from his cheek, but he doesn't put any effort as if wanting the other male to keep it there. "There's nothing wrong with asking! The more opinions, the better." Jungwon defends, "Aren't you honored I'm asking you?"

Jay smirks even more, an airy laugh escaping as he speaks, "I did say I was willing to help, right?"

"But with something in exchange!" Jungwon whisper-shouts while trying not to laugh.

By now, he has stopped trying to get Jay's fingers away from his cheek, his fingers idly wrapped around Jay's index finger and thumb. "Ok, fine. With nothing in exchange." Jay replies, letting go of Jungwon's cheek so he could play with the other male's fingers, "Just...grab some coffee with me instead."

Jungwon's eyes brighten up, "Your treat?"

"My treat."

"Deal."

They both resume the movie together, shoulders bumping as Jay moves closer to see the laptop screen better. At some point, Jungwon rests his head on the other male's shoulder, mumbling his thoughts and ideas every now and then. Jay responds to his musings with a low voice, and though he was just talking about the movie, to a stranger's eyes, it would seem as if he were whispering things meant for just the two of them to hear.

By now, Jake and Riki had settled their debate and got busy with their essays, leaving Sunghoon to notice the state Jay and Jungwon were in. Stifling a teasing grin, he nudges the other two before gesturing to their friends. Jake grins widely before mouthing "cute", and Riki chokes on a laugh before making kissy faces at Sunghoon. The tall male shakes his head, glancing at Jay and Jungwon who were unaware of their surroundings, basically in their own world. Amused, Sunghoon snaps a quick photo with his phone before getting to work on his own tasks.

Half an hour later, Riki registers footsteps approaching their table. Looking up, he sees Sunoo waving at them with a smile. "Oh, hey." Riki waves while Sunghoon and Jake greet the newcomer in a similar manner.

Sunoo falls into step behind Jay and Jungwon's seats, but they have yet to notice his presence; it doesn't bother Sunoo, rather it amuses him. He exchanges glances with the other three before tapping Jay on the shoulder.

As if snapped from his trance, Jay's eyes widen before he turns to look back. "Oh, hey Sunoo." he greets, "What's up?"

Jungwon also looks up, giving his friend a smile, "Yo."

Sunoo flashes a grin before answering. "So, I know you're probably busy with whatever but...I need you to come with me." he addresses Jay, "I passed by the student government office to drop something off, then Yunjin asked if you and I could help her with some stuff."

"Using her 'president card', huh?" Jay jokes before removing his arm from where it was resting on the backrest of Jungwon's chair. "Now?"

"Unless you wanna use your 'vice president' card and ask her to wait, then yup, now." Sunoo laughs.

"Yeah, no. She's gonna hang that over my head and say I'm abusing my power." Jay laughs lightly before excusing himself from the rest of their friends.

He ruffles Jungwon's hair before fist-bumping the other three. Sunoo waves at them cheerily, then the two make their exit from the library.

Jay had become the vice president of the student government a few weeks after their junior year had started. Ever since he was a sophomore, he was an exemplary member; it was no surprise he won the vice president's position when he ran for it a year later. He was doing a great job at it as well.

But it also meant he'd be whisked away on meetings and tasks more often, adding to his already busy schedule and workload as a junior. And that also meant spending less time with his friends - much to Jungwon's disappointment. Both his closest friends would often be busy with student government work since Sunoo was the secretary.

And right now, that disappointment showed on Jungwon's face as Jay and Sunoo left the library. A small pout is on his lip as he resumes his movie alone, the presence of Jay beside him now gone. Sunghoon, ever the observant one, notices again and decides to tease his friend.

"Jungwon." the male looks up, so he continues, "Why so sad? Jay will come back, don't worry."

"I'm not...sad?" Jungwon asks confusedly, though he knows what the other male was insinuating.

Sunghoon pushes on, "Missing someone's presence the minute they're gone is an obvious sign you have a crush on them, you know?"

"That's nonsense." Jungwon scoffs, "I miss Heeseung right now 'cause he's been busy and hasn't had the chance to spend time with us for a week. Do I have a crush on him?"

Jake laughs, "No. I mean, what Sunghoon said isn't always true, that's for sure, but also...it is pretty obvious."

"What is?"

"Your crush on Jay." Riki devilishly grins, "Look at how upset you are right now."

"Oh my gosh, no." Jungwon shakes his head adamantly, "No way. He's my best friend. I get upset when Sunoo leaves as well."

"Yeah, you do." Sunghoon somewhat agrees, "But it's different from how you look when Jay in particular is the one who leaves. I don't know. You don't see it, but we do. We've noticed it several times already."

Jungwon dismisses them with a wave of his hand, "You guys are just playing. I don't have a crush on Jay, and the way I get upset with him being away is the exact same way I get upset when it comes to Sunoo. Or anyone in our group for that matter."

"Nothing wrong with crushing on Jay." Jake mumbles with a shrug, "I'm sure Jay would appreciate it."

"And reciprocate." Riki says in between fake coughs, prompting Sunghoon to snicker.

Jungwon ignores his friends before shifting his attention back to the movie he has to finish.

Crush on Jay...what a silly suggestion, he thinks to himself.

The weather is perfect as Jay sits under the trees, thankful that their university's administration finally had tables set up in this particular area for students to study and hang around. It was a nice change of scenery, being outside with the breeze. He types away on his laptop, polishing the schedule of events that the student government had planned for the remaining academic year. Beside him, Jungwon leans on his shoulder, watching YouTube on his phone.

"Aren't you bored?" Jay asks, eyes never leaving his laptop screen.

Jungwon hums. "Not really." he replies, "Why?"

"Nothing." the other male says, "Just thought you'd get bored since I'm not really...paying attention to you or anything."

Jungwon laughs, "What am I, a baby?"

"Maybe." Jay laughs along, "You act like one sometimes."

The shorter male scoffs playfully, lifting his head from Jay's shoulder. He looks at the male and protests, "I do not."

Jay finally looks at Jungwon, his signature smirk plastered on his face. "Weren't you whining just a few minutes ago, insisting you keep me company even if I said I'd be too busy working?" he says, moving his face closer to taunt the other male.

Jungwon doesn't flinch, raising his eyebrows as if to challenge Jay. "I wasn't whining, I was simply making a point." he defends.

Jay's smirk turns into a gentler smile as he chuckles, "If you say so."

"I say so."

"Alright."

With that, he resumes working on his laptop, eventually falling deep into thought while Jungwon resumes his YouTube marathon. A comfortable silence falls between them; this wasn't unusual since they often spent a lot of time together like this, especially if their other friends were in class or busy with other activities. Jay and Jungwon could spend hours together in silence, doing their own things but still feel comfortable - all that really mattered was each other's presence.

A few minutes later, Jay gently turns his head to check on Jungwon who was much too absorbed with what seemed to be an aesthetic-looking video of someone making various cafe-styled drinks. When the person makes a cat-themed drink, Jungwon lets out a quiet giggle, dimples on full display as he smiles amusedly.

This shouldn't be anything new - Jungwon was always smiley and giggly in his presence. It shouldn't have been anything surprising.

Yet Jay doesn't know why his face suddenly feels hot. Or why his heart feels like it's suddenly stuck in his throat.

He doesn't know why his stomach flips when Jungwon shifts a little, coiling his arm around Jay's as if hugging it.

Jungwon was always a bit clingy...fond of skinship. Why would it be any different now?

Jay gulps, gently making movement with the arm Jungwon was hugging. "Are you still ok?" he asks softly.

Jungwon pauses his video then looks up at Jay with clueless eyes, "Hm?"

Was he always this cute?

Jay repeats his question, "Are you still ok?"

"Oh." Jungwon nods with a smile, "Yeah. Why? Done?"

The male shakes his head, "Not really."

"It's fine. Take your time." Jungwon chuckles, "I just found this really cool video. Who knew making coffee could be so fun and creative?"

Jungwon was still hugging Jay's arm as he watched the video, and for some reason, this made the latter feel happy. A bit proud. It was complicated...maybe a bit difficult to express or pinpoint, but Jay felt a sense of pride knowing that Jungwon was only like this to him.

What was going on with him? He never saw Jungwon's actions or behavior in that light.

"Jungwon."

"Yes?"

"Is my arm a good pillow?"

"Huh?" Jungwon seems perplexed, "Oh."

He lets go of Jay's arm, mumbling a soft "sorry" before flashing his gummy smile. "Force of habit." he says, and it prompts another smirk from Jay.

"So, is it a good pillow?"

"I don't know, I'm not exactly lying on it, am I?" Jungwon ponders before tilting his head. Jay's question did make him think; he has been doing this for some time now, but he never really thought about it being a pillow...or whatever.

"But you are hugging it."

"Yes..." Jungwon trails off, lips protruded in a pout as he thinks, "...and I guess...it is a good one?"

Jay chuckles, his lopsided grin deepening. "You know you're the only person who does this?" he asks.

The other male moves his head from side to side, a non-verbal way of expressing a prolonged "eh" sound. He then smiles back, "I guess I am. Why? Does it bother you? I can stop if it-"

"It doesn't." Jay looks at him with an unreadable expression - it's not a bad one, it's just one Jungwon hasn't really seen before. The taller male continues to speak, "It's fine, I like it when you do that."

Jungwon's cheeks flush, but he hopes the other male doesn't notice. Jay's always been sweet with his words, but there was something about the way he spoke - and looked at him - at this moment. It was somewhat different - Jungwon didn't want to think of it as "flirty", but it definitely wasn't the usual "Jay being sweet and friendly" type of tone.

"I do this a lot...why are you asking now?" Jungwon clears his throat, "I mean, why ask about that all of a sudden? Not that I mind though."

Jungwon's eyes were so bright and starry; Jay always thought they were pretty - he even mentioned it the first time they met. But right now, he fully sees how beautiful his eyes are and would 100% be willing to jump and swim in them forever. Now, he sees how he could easily get lost in the stars Jungwon held there. The thought makes his heart skip a beat again.

Jay blinks a few times before smiling, tilting his head when he answers. "I don't know. Just wanted to...make sure it was comfortable for you." he says carefully.

Jungwon nods, "It is, don't worry. I wouldn't be doing it if it wasn't."

"That's good to know."

"Is it...comfortable for you as well?" Jungwon asks.

Jay smiles gently, "Yeah. Like I said, I like it when you do that."

Jungwon pouts, cheeks definitely a shade of pink again. "What's gotten into you today?" he mumbles - cutely, Jay mentally points out.

"What?" the taller male chuckles, "Did I say something wrong?"

Jungwon shakes his head, eyebrows furrowed as he rests his head back on Jay's shoulder, "No. Nevermind, it's fine."

Jay finds himself smiling fondly as Jungwon continues to watch a new YouTube video - this time of someone baking a strawberry cake. The latter focuses on his phone screen, eyes all starry and lips pouted in concentration.

He has the sudden urge to hug Jungwon. But he and Jungwon always hugged, right? It was a normal part of their friendship. Bear hugs, playful hugs, congratulatory hugs. All of that.

But oh. Jay feels the butterflies again. He feels his cheeks flushing. He has the sudden urge to hug Jungwon and hold him in his arms like delicate porcelain - to hug him like he was his world. His and only his. To hug him and envelope him with his own warmth. To hug him and get lost in his starry eyes. To wipe the little pout away from his lips with a kiss or two.

And then he realizes exactly why he feels this way all of a sudden. He acknowledges this with a barely-audible chuckle as he returns to typing on his laptop.

He's in love with his best friend.

Several days have passed since Jay had his little epiphany. Nothing really changes between him and Jungwon, though admittedly, he has tried - keyword being tried - to be slightly more flirty with his words and actions.

Jay knows he can be charming - Yunjin always teases him for that. And it's not like relationships are foreign to him; he's had a lover once or twice in high school, nothing too serious though. But with Jungwon, he wants to be careful because the other male was his friend as well. He didn't want to scare him off or make things awkward by being too aggressive or direct with his advances. And Jay isn't exactly sure if Jungwon is just dense, naive or coy, but the latter tends to behave in a way that makes him think he's reciprocating his advances.

There was that one time they were at a cafe. Jay put his arm around Jungwon's waist - not shoulder like he usually does - to pull him aside as they waited for their drinks by the counter. Jungwon, in turn, let himself be pulled in and even rested his head on the area between Jay's shoulder and chest.

Or that one time they were hanging out by the bleachers and the wind was unusually harsh, causing Jungwon's hair to become an unruly mess. Jay reached over to tame it, making sure to gingerly brush a few strands away from the latter's face; he made it a point to smile warmly while doing so. Jungwon then giggled, gaze so loving and sweet as if Jay was the only one capable of putting stars in his eyes.

There was also the time Jay came over to Jungwon and Sunoo's dorm room as he had to work on student government tasks with the latter. While they were taking a break, Jay and Jungwon started talking about a cafe that just opened somewhere near the campus. While making plans to drop by one of these days, Jay's hand found Jungwon's and held it. The shorter male obviously let him, smiling ever-so-shyly when Jay's thumb started rubbing the skin at the back of his hand in gentle motions. Sunoo walked back into the living room area with snacks, eyebrows raised at the display in front of him.

"Is it just me or did something shift?" he slyly smiled, "Since when did you both become so...close?"

Jungwon feigned innocence, "We've always been close."

Jay simply smirked at Sunoo as if to say "oh, you know...". The male rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he sat next to the clingy duo.

Now, they were all gathered in Heeseung and Riki's dorm. They were all technically supposed to be working on their individual schoolwork, but Heeseung suggested they have a "group study" in his room since it's been a while since they last hung out, mainly due to the fact that Heeseung was exponentially busier as the only senior in their friend group.

Jake and Riki sat on the floor as they planned out a design they had to make for one of their classes; they made sure they were partners for this task. Sunghoon was on the couch, going through the script he had to memorize for a short play. Heeseung sat next to Sunghoon, finalizing something on his laptop while humming softly. Jungwon and Sunoo were going over their psychology notes in preparation for a test. Jay was editing some pictures to be used for his group's business paper. Everyone was focused and thus quiet, save for the soft music Heeseung was playing. Every now and then, Riki would crack a joke, or someone would say something randomly, causing the others to laugh. It was a peaceful and wholesome sight to behold between the seven friends.

About an hour later, Jake and Sunghoon step out for a minute to buy snacks while Heeseung, Sunoo and Riki take a break and watch something on Netflix. Jay was sitting on one of the beanbags Heeseung had in the dorm, still working, but he occasionally looked up to watch whatever was showing. Jungwon moved from his spot on the couch to stand over Jay who simply looked at him as if to ask "what's up?".

Without a word, he squeezed himself next to Jay, melting into the beanbag as well. Chuckling, the other male makes space to ensure Jungwon was comfortable. "Are you not done?" Jungwon asks.

Jay smiles, "Obviously not."

"Hurry up."

"Wow." Jay laughs, "Are you bossing me around?"

"Hm...yes." Jungwon cheekily grins, "Hurry up for real."

"Why are you in a rush?" Jay teases as he continues to edit pictures on Photoshop, shaking his head with an amused grin.

Jungwon stretches, deliberately hitting Jay's head (gently, of course) as he does so. "Because...I'm bored." he simply states.

"You're bored so now you wanna bother me." the other male responds.

"Am I bothering you?" Jungwon asks with faux-innocence, hovering his hand above Jay's laptop keyboard and making typing gestures to tease him.

Jay laughs airily, weakly swatting Jungwon's hand away. "Stop, you're gonna ruin my work." he pretends to glare.

The other male mimics the taller male's words in a playful, mocking tone before sticking his tongue out. This causes Jay to quietly mumble "unbelievable" before throwing his head back to laugh at the mischievous expression on Jungwon's face.

Somewhere down the line of their playful (or flirty?) banter, Jungwon ends up sitting on Jay's lap, the latter's laptop now on his own. The shorter male smiles triumphantly as Jay lets him make changes on the photo he was working on. Jay's hands rest comfortably at the side of Jungwon's hips as he watches the latter make his own edits, chuckling when Jungwon would make "oooh" sounds after pressing certain commands on Photoshop.

When Heeseung tears his attention away from the show that was playing on Netflix, he catches sight of Jungwon on Jay's lap - by now, the latter had his arms circled around Jungwon's waist from behind, essentially hugging him. Jay's chin rested on the other male's shoulder. It seemed like Jungwon didn't mind either as he focused on whatever it was he was doing on Jay's laptop.

"I don't see you guys for like a week, and suddenly you're acting like a couple?" Heeseung jokes, though he honestly meant it quite seriously, "What did I miss?"

Jay is about to open his mouth to answer in truth - that he does, in fact, have a crush on Jungwon, but the other male speaks ahead - but not with an answer to Heeseung's question.

"Jay, if I press this, is it going to affect the other layers?" Jungwon asks; he did hear the older male's question - he just chooses to ignore it for now.

Jungwon knew that he wasn't ready to hear the answer, whether from Jay or from himself.

Because falling in love with your best friend was probably the scariest thing that could ever happen in the history of friendships. Well, to Jungwon anyway.

And Jungwon never would have imagined it would happen to him and Jay.

With neither Jay nor Jungwon answering his question, Heeseung turns to Sunoo who can only give him a shrug and a "beats me" expression.

3 weeks later
As the weeks pass, Jay carries on with his "subtle flirting". He takes it slow, not really rushing into things. He thinks it's a good sign that Jungwon hasn't shied away from him; no awkwardness presents itself. In fact, the other male seems to be enjoying this newfound affection - if his giddy giggles, flushed-cheek smiles, and slightly increased clinginess are anything to go by.

Their group of seven are now eating lunch somewhere in the outdoor area of their campus, engaging in their usual small talk. At first, Sunghoon shares about how he and Jang Wonyoung were selected to be the "main characters" in the mini-film they have to shoot for one of their majors. Then the conversation goes to Heeseung talking about the ideas he has for his final projects. Eventually, a comfortable silence fills the air as they focus on their food.

Seizing the opportunity while everyone was busy, Jay taps Jungwon on the shoulder. "Come with me." he whispers.

Jungwon looks at him all doe-eyed before nodding, "Ok."

Jay stands up with the other following suit. "Be right back, guys." the taller male announces.

"Ok." Sunoo replies, prolonging the "kay" sound, a knowing glint in his eyes.

When Jay and Jungwon are far enough from where the group sat, Sunghoon chuckles amusedly. "I'm betting my fries that Jay's gonna confess." he says.

"No need to bet." Heeseung grins, elbows resting on the table as he gazes at the direction the two had gone off to, "Pretty sure it's obvious to all of us, except Jungwon himself."

"You think Jay's known all along that he liked Jungwon? Like I could tell months back that he was at least crushing on him." Jake says happily.

"He probably had a crush on him for a while but only realized recently." Sunoo shrugs, "It's Jungwon who's probably oblivious - he probably thinks Jay's just being sweet as usual."

Riki makes a "pffft" sound before waving his hand casually, "Jungwon? He's not the type to be oblivious. Act coy maybe, but not oblivious. I think he knows..."

"He knows but chooses to pretend nothing's going on?" Heeseung laughs lightly.

"Yes!" Riki claps his hands once, "He's probably waiting for Jay to verbally say something so he doesn't look stupid assuming."

Sunoo hums, "Very Jungwon of him."

"But then he could also just be in denial. His best friend crushing on him? He's probably confused." Sunghoon says, "For all we know, he'd be in denial of feeling the same."

"And that too."

Somewhere more quiet with less students crowding around, Jungwon stands with Jay a few steps in front of him. Jungwon is usually a perceptive one, but a million different ideas swarm in his head at the moment - what was Jay up to?

The taller male stares at the ground for a few seconds before clearing his throat; for some reason, the gesture has Jungwon nervous. "Before I speak, you have to promise you won't leave me hanging." Jay says, "Or...you won't run away without saying anything."

Jungwon blinks a few times before nodding, "Oh...I promise. As long as you aren't secretly plotting my murder."

At this, Jay laughs with his signature smile on full display; Jungwon won't admit his heart skipped a beat at the sight. "Well, let's hope what I'm about to tell you won't give you a heart attack." the taller male smirks.

Jungwon offers him a small and almost shy smile, pursing his lips to conceal a much larger grin. With that, Jay clears his throat again and finally speaks. "I know this is probably going to be really weird coming from me, but..." he scratches the back of his neck, shaking his head with a shy chuckle, "I wanted to tell you...that...uh..."

Jungwon wants to coo at how the "cool and charismatic" Jay who usually wore a cockily confident smirk was profusely blushing at the moment. The Jay whose piercing gaze easily maintained eye contact with him, now struggling to look into his eyes as they darted about.

The shorter male smiles, offering a playful but gentle smile, "Are you going to finally admit that you were the one who ate the last slice of my strawberry cake the other day?"

Jay is thankful for the way Jungwon tries to calm his nerves - he always knows how to anyway. It was one of the things he loved about the other male. Laughing at the statement, Jay steels himself and finds the strength to look directly into Jungwon's eyes.

With the surge of courage, Jay reaches a hand forward to hold one of Jungwon's. He breathes out, "Jungwon, I like you."

The other male's mouth slightly opens in pleasant surprise, so Jay takes the chance to continue speaking. "I know we've been pretty close ever since we met, and I'm more than grateful to have met you as such. But now, I'm realizing that I like you...as more than a friend. I think I've always felt this way, but...I guess this silly brain of mine just realized recently." he admits, smiling warmly, "I'm sorry, I usually have so much to say but I'm...I'm at a loss right now. I just hope it's enough to get my point - my feelings - across."

The way Jay smiles at him makes Jungwon want to scream and melt and then come back to life and then scream again. The way Jay's hands feel so perfectly-fit around his own makes him want to sing the entirety of Sunoo's romantic Spotify playlist.

But then the realization also dawns on him a split-second later - his best friend has feelings for him.

He curses in his head.

Jungwon feels hot - both because of his flushed cheeks and because of the sudden panic in his veins. He's pretty sure he feels the same...right? He likes being with Jay; he loves it more than anything. Jay makes him happy. Jay makes him feel safe and loved. Jay is always there for him, through the good and bad. And looking back at how ecstatic he felt whenever he was with the latter, maybe Jungwon realizes that he wants to do more than just hold hands, lean on his shoulder or hug his arm. Maybe he wants to kiss him and go on silly little dates. Maybe he wants to say "I like you too".

But his brain was screaming "ABORT MISSION!" again and again.

His brain was whispering doubt and fear, telling him that one wrong move and it's not just a relationship that would be ending, but also their so-very precious friendship.

And Jungwon couldn't have that, never. His friendship with Jay was the most important thing in his life. How could he risk losing that over romance?

His throat is dry, but Jungwon swallows the lump and carefully responds. "You have no idea how insanely happy that makes me." he starts, "Really. I'm really happy to hear that. You...you're such a precious and important person to me."

Jay patiently waits for Jungwon to form his words, a small smile on his lips as he observes the nervousness on the latter's face.

But he also knows there's an impending "but" statement approaching.

"But I need more time." Jungwon shakily breathes out. If it weren't for Jay giving his hand a gentle squeeze, he probably would have started tearing up. He continues, "I know this isn't the answer you could have hoped for, I'm so sorry. I just...want to be sure. I just need to think about it really well. I'm admittedly nervous, so I don't want to make rash decisions. But please know that I'm really flattered that you feel this way about me."

Jungwon says everything so quickly and in almost one breath, Jay can't help but chuckle at how adorable his friend is. With a gentle grin, he lets go of Jungwon's hand in favor of carefully ruffling his hair. "Take as long as you want, Jungwon. I'm more than willing to wait 'til the day you have your answer." he says.

"I'm so sorry." Jungwon closes his eyes, afraid that a pained expression might be on his best friend's face.

"Hey." Jay pokes his cheek before chuckling, "You don't have to apologize for anything, ok? These are my feelings and mine alone. You don't owe me anything, Jungwon, and you surely aren't obligated to reciprocate just because I confessed. So please, don't apologize."

Jungwon opens his eyes to meet with Jay's ever-so warm gaze. He mirrors the smile on his friend's face, nodding slightly. "Thank you, Jay." he says softly.

Jay would be a liar if he said he didn't feel dejected - but what he said was true. He doesn't want to force Jungwon into anything and is more than willing to wait, but of course, a small part of him felt a twinge of pain. That was for him to deal with. It wasn't Jungwon's responsibility. With his signature smirk, Jay gestures his head to the side and says, "Let's head back?"

Jungwon nods, but before leaving, he reaches forward for Jay's hand, intertwining their fingers. "Let's go." he smiles at the other male before leading the way.

When they arrive where they last left their friends, the other five take note of their locked hands, but the two ignore the inquisitive eyes asking silent questions. He and Jungwon then let go of each other's hands the minute they sat down, acting like nothing happened. Sunghoon and Jake give Jay knowing looks with Jake barely able to hide the teasing grin on his face. Jay can only give them a warning glare before the two begin snickering in secret.

Meanwhile, Sunoo nudges Jungwon with his elbow. When he has the other male's attention, he mouths "what happened?", but Jungwon only shushes him before taking a sip from the americano he left on the table before going off with Jay.

A silent question lingers in the air, but Heeseung believes it should be answered on another day, so he breaks the ice and speaks up. "Guys, what do you think of a song like this?" he plays an instrumental on his phone, and soon, the group of seven are immersed in a musical discussion.

Five of them are oblivious to the fact that Jungwon has reached for Jay's hand once again, fingers laced together under the table.

I'm standin' on a tightrope alone
I hold my breath a little bit longer
Halfway out the door, but it won't close
A month passes since Jay realized his feelings, and approximately a week or two since he confessed. He continues to patiently wait for Jungwon, but he doesn't press, remind or bring any of it up. He's more than happy to know that Jungwon still chooses to spend their free time together, thankfully without any tension or awkwardness.

But he does admit that there are days he feels like Jungwon is just enjoying the way he quietly squirms. Maybe. He isn't sure because Jungwon did say he needed more time to think things through, but at the same time, he does things that are "too sweet for a friend", and it makes Jay think that those nonverbal cues and body language are the other male's answer to his confession.

There's the lingering touches Jungwon's fingers leave on his hand when he sleepily leans his head on Jay's shoulder. There's also the irresistibly adorable and sickly sweet grins he sends Jay's way when he asks him to keep him company in the cafe or his dorm room. And not to mention the times he's willing or doesn't shy away from Jay's skinship, not limited to hugs but even cuddles.

Friends hug...but do they cuddle on the couch when Sunoo isn't in the dorm room as Netflix idly plays in the background? Do friends cuddle the way they do on Jay's bed when Jake and Sunghoon are out late for their night classes? Yeah, Jay didn't think so.

Jay is exceptionally patient, probably the most patient in their friend group. If he had a dollar for every time he'd display this impressive patience, he'd be a million times richer than he already was. And he's willing to keep being patient for Jungwon.

But as more time passes, he also begins to feel the desperation of wanting to hear Jungwon's answer once and for all.

Maybe that way, he can fully enjoy their cuddle sessions. And more.

The seven friends gather at a nearby mall a few days after Riki brings up the idea to watch one of the newly-released movies everyone seemed to be talking about on social media. Once seated in the theater, popcorn and drinks in their hands, they settle and relax and the big screen illuminates the room.

Sunghoon, being the film major he is, took everything to heart and felt awestruck with the acting, gasping and making "wow" sounds every now and then. Sunoo, Heeseung and Jake appreciated the movie, making random theories and predictions amongst themselves. Riki joined in, making bets with the others on how the ending would be.

When Jay and Jungwon are done sharing their bets, they return to focusing on the movie, not paying much attention to Riki and Jake quietly bantering again. Jay glances to the side, heart skipping a beat at the way Jungwon's starry eyes stare at the screen because, oh, he's so pretty; he knows the latter is probably making mental notes of the scenes so he could use them in his research papers or essays. Jay guesses it's one of his habits to analyze things, given his major.

It's cute.

Jay gulps, wiping his sweaty hand on his jeans before reaching it over the seat's armrest to oh-so-slowly take Jungwon's hand in his. On most days, Jungwon easily reciprocates, immediately lacing their fingers together. This time, Jay can feel the latter tense a bit - it doesn't last long, however, because Jungwon soon moves his fingers, locking them together with Jay's like perfectly woven thread.

Throughout the movie, their hands remain locked. Jay brushes his thumb across Jungwon's soft skin every now and then, unaware of the fact that the other male's heart is on the verge of going into overdrive. Jungwon can feel his cheeks flaring up, both excitement and nervousness rushing through his veins. Every time he feels the pad of Jay's thumb lazily brushing across the back of his own, he has the insane urge to turn in his seat and kiss him senseless.

Whatever that meant. The fact that he has such thoughts kind of scares him.

Jungwon lets out a rather deep and long sigh before risking a glance at the male beside him. To his surprise, Jay is also looking at him. The shorter male's eyes widen, prompting a chuckle from the other. "What?" Jungwon then asks in a hushed manner.

"Nothing." Jay laughs, "You good?"

"Yeah." Jungwon quickly glances at their hands before locking gazes with Jay, "I'm good."

The other male gives him his signature smirk before turning his attention back to the movie. Jungwon mentally yells at himself for being "so embarrassing". He tries not to let his flustered thoughts flood his mind by turning back to the big screen.

When the movie finishes, the seven friends exit the theater with excited chatter and vivid discussions of the plot and ending. Sunoo and Sunghoon celebrate their win while Riki laments having proposed the idea to bet in the first place. They then quickly make their way to a nearby restaurant for dinner, and afterwards, head back to their respective dorm rooms.

Jay and Jungwon, however, stay behind as they decide to stroll around in the park a few blocks away. Hand-in-hand, they enjoy the cool evening breeze while talking about the movie they had just watched. Jay shares his thoughts while Jungwon listens intently - other people found Jay a tad bit too talkative, especially when he geeked out on certain things. But not Jungwon. Jungwon absolutely adored the way Jay had a lot to say, or how he had so much knowledge and insights on various things. It was one of the things he admired about his friend, among other things.

He could listen to Jay talk about literally anything for hours. Maybe a part of that was because he liked hearing the male's deep and smooth voice.

Jungwon realizes that he never saw it that way. Granted, Jay had one of the deeper voices in their group of friends, but he never thought of it as...attractive. People had different voices, after all, so having a deeper voice than others shouldn't have been such an uncommon thing.

Yet here he was, melting inside as he listened to Jay ramble about the movie with his honey-like baritone. Here he was, wondering if Jay's silky voice would sound even smoother and raspier if he whispered sweet nothings into his ear.

Wait, what?, he asks himself, eyes wide and cheeks a shade of red as his brain fully registers his thoughts.

"Jungwon? Earth to Jungwon?"

Said voice breaks him from his trance. The shorter male blinks before whipping his head to face Jay. "I'm sorry, what?" he asks.

Jay chuckles, stopping in his tracks, "I was asking if you think the movie should have ended in a different way."

"Oh." Jungwon sheepishly smiles before answering, "I don't think so. I think the ending being open-ended was a nice touch. It makes sense too, considering that the movie was most probably made to get the audience to think...kind of stir us all into a deep thought or make us each realize something in our own ways."

"Hmm." Jay hums, smiling fondly at the male in front of him. He then says, "Yeah, I agree. I don't usually like open-ended endings but I'll let this one slide. It was written pretty well."

"It was." Jungwon nods, eyes never leaving Jay's.

"You ok?"

"What do you mean?"

"You were spacing out a while ago."

Jungwon makes an "o" shape with his mouth before chuckling in embarrassment. He shakes his head before tearing his eyes away from Jay's, focusing now on the ground below. "Oh. Just...thinking." he says slowly.

"About?" Jay prods gently.

"Stuff." Jungwon tries, "I mean, just...a lot of stuff in general. You know, we're getting busier with our workload...and other stuff."

"Jungwon."

"Hm?" the male looks up upon his name being called, not exactly ready for what Jay was about to do.

The taller male brushes a few strands of hair away from his face, fingers brushing against his skin as they tentatively hover above his cheek. Jungwon has to purse his lips just to stay sane and calm as he watches the way Jay's gaze flits back and forth between his eyes and lips. "You're really pretty, you know?" he whispers in a low voice.

Did he read my mind?, Jungwon panics, remembering his thoughts from minutes ago.

"Stop." he pouts, looking away with tomato-like cheeks, "That's not fair."

"Why? Can't I compliment you?" Jay laughs amusedly.

"No. I mean, well..." Jungwon stutters, "You can, but like...it's not fair, dropping that all of a sudden."

Jay chuckles at this before mumbling a soft apology. He withdraws his hand from where it hovered near Jungwon's cheek and turns on his heel to continue their walk. Before he can do so, Jungwon surges forward, grabbing his hand and giving it a light tug.

"Hm?" Jay hums, tilting his head in silent inquiry.

Jungwon clears his throat. "Jay...about the other time..." he starts.

"You need to be specific, Won."

"About..." breathe in. "what you said...your confession." breathe out.

"Oh." Jay says briefly.

If their flirting and little displays of affection were anything to go by, wouldn't that mean Jungwon was reciprocating his feelings? Jay doesn't want to expect until he hears the words from Jungwon himself, but a part of him was admittedly hopeful. He didn't want to put any meaning into it, but being the logical person that he was, he reminded himself that it was just as equally possible for Jungwon to turn him down and remain friends.

He held his breath for what seemed to be eternity.

"I think I almost have my answer." Jungwon finally confesses, squeezing Jay's hand to calm his own nerves, "Just a little more, please."

"Of course." Jay tries to smile as reassuringly as possible, returning the gentle squeeze on Jungwon's hand, "Anything for you."

The two return to their dorms with more whispers clouding their minds than they did when they watched the thought-provoking movie earlier.

Why'd you have to lead me on?
Why'd you have to twist the knife?
Walk away and leave me bleedin', bleedin'?

Why'd you whisper in the dark
Just to leave me in the night?
Now your silence has me screamin', screamin'
1 week later
The same cycle continues - Jay and Jungwon's friendship doesn't regress or turn into anything sour, but it doesn't exactly move forward in a...romantic or "more than friends" way either. They don't get to spend much time together though, but it was more because of their busy schedules; Jay, along with Sunoo, was busy with student government work most of the time while Jungwon had to finish a heap of work that one of his professors suddenly dumped for the week.

Sunghoon, Heeseung and Jake took the opportunity to talk to Jay about his confession and feelings for Jungwon. He opened up to them - complete with his doubts and hopelessness - and though they tease him over it, they also gave very valuable and meaningful advice. Jay was thankful to have friends like them, being brutally realistic but still supportive and encouraging.

Riki and Sunoo also did the same, speaking to Jungwon when they could. Although Jungwon didn't open up as much, he does share his apprehensions and fears over getting into a relationship with one of his closest best friends.

"Isn't it weird? Like what if you break up and things become awkward and things never go back to how it was when you were best friends?" Jungwon had ranted back then.

"First of all, why are you thinking about that?" Sunoo raised an eyebrow, "What if you never break up and you're just overthinking it?"

"So much can possibly happen!" Jungwon countered.

Riki laughed, "Yeah, that's true! But it doesn't immediately mean a break up! For all you know, Jay could be the man of your dreams! The most ideal guy for you!"

"Shut up! You're confusing me even more!"

"How am I confusing you?"

Sunoo groaned, "You guys! Oh my gosh!"

After another hectic week, Jungwon feels like smashing the wall with his bare fist. Maybe he could use his taekwondo skills on the nearest tree and let his frustrations out. Everything was just so stressful for him - from the insane workload to his impatiently growing feelings for his best friend, things were piling on top of each other, and it was getting very tiring for him to keep up with it all.

He's walking along the corridor, spotting a trash bin nearby. He tosses his empty americano cup like a ball, but it narrowly misses the bin. Even throwing trash isn't going my way?, he mentally whines.

He picks up his trash and throws it in the bin before releasing a deep sigh - he's lost count of how many times he's done that throughout the week. He covers his face with his hands and rubs angrily as if doing so is going to bring peace back into his burned-out life. Would it be stupid to cry right now? Because Jungwon feels like he wants to cry and curse at the same time.

Thinking that's exactly what he needs to do, he sharply turns on his heel. In doing so, he collides with a firm chest and stumbles backward. A hand grasps his wrist, easily steadying his figure.

"You look like you got attacked by a wild animal." and then a familiar chuckle.

Jungwon looks up at Jay. "Maybe I did." he grumbles, tired eyes pleading with the taller male. What he was pleading for, he wasn't sure, but his silent plea certainly made its way to the other male as he offered a warm smile.

"Right." Jay shoves his hands in his pockets, "So...chill in the dorm?"

"Yes please."

"Mine or yours?"

"Hmm...mine. Sunoo isn't going to be back until later this evening." Jungwon explains, "He has to finish something with his groupmates."

"Alright, let's go."

In Jungwon's dorm, they sit on the couch while a James Bond movie plays on the TV. It's quiet and comfortable as usual; Jungwon lazily leans against Jay's side who simply lets him do so. He always will. But as time passes, Jungwon zones out and feels the exhaustion fully taking hold of his entire being - both physically and mentally. Without much thought, he sneaks a glance at the male beside him; of course, Jay is absorbed watching his favorite movie, a small smirk on his lips as he watches James Bond eliminate his enemies.

If I kiss him, will that smirk disappear?

Jungwon blames it on a tired mind. He blames it on his professor who dumped a crap-ton of work just because he was going on an impromptu vacation for the week. He blames it on the stress of having to carry the tasks of groupmates who weren't cooperative.

He throws a leg over Jay's lap; the other male doesn't think much of it as Jungwon had tendencies to act like that every now and then. When Jungwon sees that Jay doesn't give much of a reaction, he scoots closer, leaning his head on his shoulder. The other male simply rests his head atop Jungwon's.

Jungwon's sense of logic and sanity hangs by a thread as he moves his head, now nuzzling his face into the crook of Jay's neck. He hates perfumes and colognes as they tend to be overpowering. Despite this sensitivity to such, Jungwon feels intoxicated with whatever perfume Jay had on - it was so distinctly Jay, strong but warm and comforting, and he couldn't get enough of it.

Jay swallows thickly when Jungwon's nose prods against his skin, the latter's breath tickling the area near his ear. "Jungwon?" he quietly asks.

Jungwon doesn't respond with words - instead, he continues to nuzzle deeper, lips gently grazing Jay's skin at this point. The taller male feels dizzy, and suddenly the room is too stuffy despite the airconditioning being at a relatively colder temperature. "Jungwon." he tries again, but his friend continues to ignore.

Sighing, Jay lowers the volume before carefully shifting on the couch. He gently takes Jungwon's wrists in an attempt to get his attention. He successfully does so because Jungwon finally looks at him with glazed eyes, an unreadable expression swimming where the stars usually linger. The sight of it all makes Jay feel like he'd been hit on the face by a soccer ball kicked by Jake, and it takes every ounce of his self-control to not devour the male in front of him.

"Are you ok?" he asks, one hand letting go of Jungwon's wrist so he could cup his cheek.

That was a mistake, because Jay may have had his self-control in check, but not Jungwon. All sense of logic and sanity leaves the shorter male as he shuts his eyes and leans forward, pressing his lips onto Jay's.

Jay is taken aback, eyes wide at Jungwon's sudden action. The latter pulls away, opening his eyes to peer at Jay with the same unreadable expression - this time, his cheeks are flushed a beautiful shade of pink.

And suddenly, Jay feels like the word "self-control" doesn't exist.

He chases Jungwon, pressing gentle kisses on his lips. Jungwon doesn't retreat; he lets Jay capture his lips and lead the dance. Jungwon tastes like sugar, and Jay finds it more difficult to hold back with each kiss they share. He braces the other male's nape with his hand, pulling him closer to kiss deeper. Jungwon gently hums in bliss when the other parts his lips open with his tongue. He could get lost in this dizzying sensation, but it's when Jay gently bites down on his lip that Jungwon opens his eyes, realizing what they were doing.

As if snapping out of a deep spell, Jungwon pulls away and tries to even his breathing. His hands are on Jay's shoulders, holding him at arm's length as he looks everywhere but at the male. "Jay..." he breathes out.

"Jungwon."

"Shit." Jungwon mutters, shaking his head, "Oh my gosh, Jay. Wait, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to. Oh my gosh. Jay-"

Jay clears his throat, cheeks flushed as well. "Jungwon, it's ok. Breathe." he tries.

Jungwon shakes his head, "Jay, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. My bad, that was my mistake, it was my mistake. I didn't mean to do that."

The other male feels an aching tear in his heart - it certainly wasn't a mistake in his opinion, but he respected Jungwon's feelings and decided to keep that to himself. "Hey, calm down. Jungwon, it's ok. We...we don't have to. Let's just...forget it happened. Let's watch the movie, hm?" he tries again

He tries to reach for Jungwon's hand, but the latter pulls back, eyes wide with fear - not of Jay but of himself. "I'm sorry, can you please...go?" Jungwon squeaks out.

"I'm sorry, what?" Jay questions.

Jungwon closes his eyes, burying his face in hands, "Jay, please. Go. I need...I need to calm down. I need space."

"Jungwon, this isn't-" Jay tries to reason with the male, not wanting to leave him like this. Not in this state, and definitely not with this...unresolved tension hanging between them.

"Jay, please."

With a resigned sigh, Jay gently pats Jungwon's back before standing from the couch and grabbing his bag. He spares one last glance at the male before opening the door. Just as he does so, Sunoo stands there, hand reaching forward as if to open the doorknob as well. Tilting his head, Sunoo asks the silent question of "what's up?", but Jay can only smile sadly - or defeatedly, rather.

It's all Sunoo needs for him to know that something happened between him and Jungwon. "I won't pry," he starts, "but...is he ok?"

"He's...probably gonna need space." Jay says with a calm smile, but he's anything but calm inside.

"And you?" Sunoo asks with concern.

"You know me." Jay smirks - Sunoo can tell it's not his usual one but rather quite empty, "I'll be fine."

And with that, he excuses himself and allows Sunoo to step inside. The other male watches Jay casually walk down the dorm's corridor, most probably to his own room, before taking a very deep breath. When he closes the door and makes a beeline to the couch, he sees Jungwon's distressed state.

"Oh boy." Sunoo sighs to himself.

The next day, Jungwon's face is shoved into his textbook as he studies at one of the tables in the campus quadrangle. Sunoo arrives, plopping down on the seat next to his friend's. Without a second to spare, his friend fires away. "So, spill." Sunoo crosses his arms, "What happened yesterday?"

Jungwon unintentionally glares before shaking his head and sighing. "It's nothing, stop prying." he mumbles.

Sunoo shakes his head and doesn't take that as an answer, "Jungwon. It's obviously not 'nothing' if you're acting like this."

"Acting like what?"

"Don't play dumb with me." Sunoo sighs, "You know what? Forget it. Come on. Let's take a walk."

"I need to study."

Sunoo smiles before closing Jungwon's textbook and gently tugging his arm, "We're in the same class for this one, silly. The test is in three days, you have enough time. Come on. You need this."

Jungwon relents, allowing his friend to pull him up on his feet. They walk around the campus in silence, but Jungwon mentally thanks Sunoo because he somehow manages to feel more relaxed. The latter begins to talk about the new cafe he visited with the other student government members; Jungwon listened to him, though admittedly his mind was somewhere else. He does take note of when Sunoo mentioned really good cakes and desserts though.

The two friends end up by the outdoor basketball court where Riki, Jake, and as fate has it, Jay, are excitedly playing a game of said sport. Somewhere off to the side, Sunghoon takes photos using his film camera - just another one of his hobbies. Riki is the first to notice their presence nearby, so he happily waves, "Sunoo! Jungwon!"

Jake calls them over, unaware of the fact that Jay slightly tenses. The latter plays it off when Sunoo and Jungwon approach, and soon, the six of them are gathered as they engage in small talk. Sunoo and Sunghoon lead the conversation with the others naturally going along. Riki notices that Jay and Jungwon barely spare each other a glance, a thick tension clouding between just those two. He doesn't bring it up, instead focusing on how Jake excitedly talks.

A few moments later, Heeseung walks over, clasping a hand on Jay's shoulder. "Hey." he greets, "Got a minute? I need your help." Heeseung says while making a strumming gesture as if to hint it had something guitar-related.

"Yeah, sure." Jay offers a grin before turning to the rest of their group, "See you guys around."

"Bye." Heeseung follows suit, smiling at their friends as he and Jay make their leave.

With the two gone from the vicinity, Sunghoon boldly speaks up, "Is it just me, or is there some...tension?"

Sunoo eyes Jungwon knowingly, eyebrows raised. "Thought you'd never ask." Riki says before turning to Jungwon as well, "Is everything ok?"

"It's nothing." Jungwon says curtly, eyes avoiding his friends' gazes.

Jake frowns, looking at the latter with concern. "Come on...you can tell us, Jungwon." he says gently.

"Yeah," Jungwon begins before offering a smaller smile, "but really, it's fine. I'm not...really in the mood."

Sunghoon crosses his arms and says, "It's not good to keep it bottled in."

"I know, but just not now. Besides, don't you three have classes in a few minutes?" Jungwon replies.

"Yeah." Riki shrugs, "Next time then?"

"Next time."

Though Sunghoon, Jake and Riki want to stay and talk, they excuse themselves and head for their respective classrooms. Now that it was just him and Sunoo, Jungwon lets out the breath he was holding.

"I kissed Jay."

"Jungwon..."

"And he kissed me back."

Sunoo looks at his friend with a warm gentleness; he rubs the other male's back before carefully speaking, "It's alright..."

"It's not alright, Sunoo. I-" Jungwon chokes on a sob, "I don't know, ok? I really don't know anymore."

A tear escapes Jungwon's eye, trailing down his cheek in a tragically beautiful way. Sunoo sighs, pulling his friend into his arms for a tight embrace. "Why do you keep lying to yourself, Jungwon?" he asks.

Jungwon shakes his head, burying his face in his friend's shoulder. "Because I don't know how I really feel." he answers.

Sunoo responds, "You don't know? Or you don't want to admit it?"

Jungwon closes his eyes, "I don't know."

Sunoo knows more than anyone that Jungwon himself is already aware of how he feels for Jay, but he just won't admit it because of the fear he has. This causes him to be confused - admit his feelings and risk a relationship, or leave things as they are?

Though the right choice to make seems clear, Sunoo doesn't push and pry. He knows and believes Jungwon will figure things out eventually. He'll just be there for his best friend to lean on. He just hopes Jungwon doesn't hurt himself - and Jay - further in the process. He hopes Jungwon doesn't choose a path that will leave him heartbroken.

Days later, Jay and Jungwon still don't get to see each other - it wasn't because they were avoiding each other, but really more on busy schedules yet again. Jay thinks it'd be better that way, considering Jungwon probably wasn't ready to face him yet. Though it hurts him to think that those kisses - those sweet, sweet kisses - could have driven a gap between their friendship, he knows that Jungwon would appreciate the space so he could think clearly.

Jay loves Jungwon more than anyone, and if this is what they needed to keep the friendship afloat, then so be it.

Sunoo is at the 5th floor of the library preparing for a presentation, and Jungwon decides to keep him company. "So, you're going to be the project head for this?" Jungwon asks, laying his head on the table.

Sunoo nods, "Well, me, Taehyun and Chaewon. It was supposed to be Yunjin and Jay, but since they're the president and vice president, they have more 'important' things to deal with. Yunjin appointed the three of us instead. It's fine, I like a challenge."

"Hmm. I see." the male responds absentmindedly.

While Sunoo is busy rehearsing what he was supposed to say, typing on the laptop if he wanted to change anything, Jungwon sits up straight and turns to the side. Sunoo chose a table near the windows so he could "energize" himself with the sunny brightness outside. Jungwon then looks out of the windows, peering down at the students passing by outside. Just then, two familiar figures come into sight, laughing as they rough-housed with each other.

Riki uses his height to sling an arm around Jay's neck and shoulder, but the latter is still stronger, so he puts up a good fight. The two laugh for a few seconds before letting go of each other. The taller male points somewhere in the distance, and Jay nods in response. Riki then whips his phone out to make a call. While waiting, Jay senses someone's eyes on him. He looks around, but when he doesn't see anyone, his brain tells him to look back, then upwards.

Surely, as he does so, he locks eye contact with Jungwon. It's too late for the latter to look away, so he tries his best to keep his gaze on Jay. Not wanting to seem mean or awkward, Jungwon shyly waves, a small but hesitant smile on his lips. Thankfully, Jay mirrors the gesture, waving back and giving the other male a gentle smile. Just then, Riki ends his call and gestures for him and Jay to walk towards the direction he was pointing at earlier.

Jay gives one last smile at Jungwon, slightly wider this time, before walking away with the tall male beside him. Once they're gone, Jungwon turns to Sunoo and suddenly asks, "How's Jay doing these days?"

"Why are you asking me?" Sunoo genuinely looks confused

"You see him more because of the student government stuff."

"Yes..." Sunoo starts slowly, "And I know you haven't seen each other recently, but don't you guys text or talk on the phone?"

Jungwon shakes his head, "Not really, no."

"I see." his friend nods before closing his laptop shut, "Jay's fine. He's doing fine. A bit busy with government work on top of his majors and classes, but it's Jay - he'll manage. Jake says he falls right asleep when he gets back to their dorm."

"Ok. And..." Jungwon gulps, unsure of his next words, "does he still...you know. Want to..."

"Wait for you? Pursue you? Like you?" Sunoo guesses, but he already knows the answer, "Jay was honest with his feelings. Those won't go away just because you don't talk for a few days, alright? You said you'd give him your answer once you've thought about it, and he's more than willing to wait, right?"

"Yes."

"Then that's it." Sunoo says, clasping his hands together before leaning forward, "Jay's feelings will never change, Won. That's for him to bear and be responsible for. What's yours to bear is to give him an answer eventually. If you tell him 'I like you too, let's date' or something, then what happens next is between the two of you. But if you tell him 'sorry Jay, let's just be friends', then you make sure you mean it."

Jungwon opens his mouth to speak, but Sunoo cuts him off, "If you tell Jay you just want to be friends, you better stop being all touchy and clingy with him. You need to stop holding his hand under the table, or getting all cuddly in bed, or whatever you guys keep doing that's definitely not for 'just friends'."

"Wait-"

"Jay told me." Sunoo shrugs, "He opens up to me, you know?"

"Right." Jungwon sighs.

"Anyway," Sunoo continues, "You need to be clear once and for all, Jungwon. If you keep prolonging this, you're just leading him on. He needs to know if he can cross that line, or stay behind it. You're both going to get hurt if you keep holding on to this whole 'blurred line' thing."

Jungwon takes it all on, completely absorbing his friend's words. It takes a few minutes for everything to sink in, but he eventually speaks up. "I know, thank you for saying all that, Sunoo." he begins, "But...it's just really confusing and scary to me. Let's say I do like him and we start dating. What if things go wrong and I lose him not just as a lover but even as a friend? What if we don't work out, but we can't return to being best friends because things would be weird and awkward?"

"Those are things you can't control or predict." Sunoo frowns, "It's like what Riki said. Why are you thinking of these things when you can just take it one step at a time? This is Jay we're talking about, one of the most patient and understanding people ever. He'd be more than willing to go on this journey with you, even when it gets rough."

"It's not Jay that I'm worried about." Jungwon admits, "It's me. What if I mess things up?"

Sunoo reaches for Jungwon's hand across the table, "I understand your apprehension. It's completely valid, ok? Jay's your best friend, and losing that is scary. I know we hear people saying they'd rather give up a relationship when things get hard, as long as they get to keep their best friend, but that isn't always the case, is it? Who says that needs to happen?"

Jungwon's eyes are still filled with unease and apprehension, so Sunoo gives his hand a squeeze. "I don't want you to rush into things if you really don't want to." Sunoo says, "But give it some thought, hm? If you don't want to hurt Jay - and yourself, you need to be clear and make that decision at some point."

"I know. Thank you, Sunoo."

Now I'm pacin' on shaky ground
Strike a match, then you blow it out
Oh no, oh no, it's not fair
'Cause you kiss mе and it stops time
And I'm yours, but you're not mine
Oh no, oh no, you're not there
The weekend comes, and Heeseung invites the six friends for a night out drinking - to celebrate his final project proposal being approved. Of course, all of them agree. Riki jokes it was because Heeseung said it was his treat.

Now gathered in a bar, the seven friends enjoy their snack and drinks while congratulating Heeseung, the eldest in their group. "So what's next?" Jake asks excitedly.

Heeseung smiles, answering after he takes a sip of his drink, "So, now that the proposal is approved, I can start writing and producing the tracks I'd like to include in the album. I've already started on some, actually."

"That's so cool." Riki chuckles, "So, do all music majors have to produce an album by the end of their senior year, or was that just your choice?"

"It's a common choice." the eldest explains, "Some choose this, some choose to collaborate with other majors - such as the multimedia majors, film majors, etc. If Sunghoon was a senior, I probably would have done that...make the soundtrack for the thesis film they'd have to submit before graduation."

Sunghoon grins, "That would have been cool."

Heeseung grins, "Right? But really, thank you guys. I wouldn't have made it this far in my senior year if it weren't for you all."

"Speech, speech, speech!" Jake and Riki chant while raising their glasses, prompting the group to laugh.

"After I graduate, promise." the eldest male grins, "Also gotta thank Jay for his help on one of the tracks that's gonna be on that project."

"Oh?" Sunoo playfully shoves Jay who was sitting beside him, "Look at you, Mr. Vice President."

Jay chuckles at his friend's jest, shaking his head. "I barely did anything, just helped him with the guitar sounds." he says, hiding a shy smile behind his glass.

Heeseung laughs, "Well, it's still a big help, considering I have to do everything myself."

Further into their drinking session, the group starts to play simple drinking games. Their table is filled with fun and laughter as they let loose and relax in each other's presence; it was something they all needed amidst the hectic bustle of their academic stresses - and emotional stresses, for some of them.

Soon Heeseung, Jake and Jungwon start to get tipsy. It's evident in the way Heeseung giggles at everything they say, whether funny or not - much to Riki's amusement, of course. Jake shifts from clinging to Riki, then clinging to Sunghoon, then back and forth. He's a sleepy kind of tipsy, and Sunghoon takes it upon himself to snap some photos for memories' sake.

Jungwon, however, proves to be Jay's obstacle for the evening...not the alcohol.

The shorter male stares into space, not a single thought entering his mind. He can only cling to the nearest, most sturdy thing in his reach, and that so happens to be Jay. He hugs his arm, snuggling his head against the taller male's shoulder. Being the gentleman that he was, Jay allows him - it's not like there was any malice. If Sunoo or Riki or Heeseung or any of their friends were doing the same, Jay would obviously let them. Besides, he still cared about Jungwon; of course he'd want the latter to be comfortable.

But when Jungwon starts to fall asleep on Jay's shoulder, Sunoo notices the subtle tense of the latter's jaw. Shaking his head, the male speaks up. "I think we should call it a night, you guys." Sunoo laughs, "Most of you are at your limit."

Sunoo thought it was a good idea to skip drinking too much. He knew this was going to happen, and he's glad Sunghoon, Jay and Riki are pretty much sober still. He would not want to take care of each and every drunk or tipsy friend by himself; it would have been a nightmare to do so.

"Yeah." Jay agrees, quickly checking on Jungwon before looking at Sunghoon and Riki, "You guys good?"

"Yeah." Riki drinks a glass of water.

Sunghoon gently wakes a sleepy Jake before chuckling and saying, "Riki and I can take care of Jake."

Heeseung clears his throat, "I'm ok, by the way. Just tipsy, but I'm sober enough, don't worry."

"Yeah, right." Sunoo scoffs, passing him a glass of water.

The eldest drinks before laughing, flashing Sunoo a smile. "How about we walk around to cool down before going back? You guys can join if you want to." he says.

"Nah." Sunghoon chuckles, "We'll take Jake back. A tipsy Jake is a sleepy Jake, so it's best if we get back to the dorms while he's still somehow awake."

"Jay? Jungwon?" Sunoo turns to the other two.

Jay smiles amusedly, gently nudging a sleeping Jungwon. "I'll take him to your dorm." he says.

Sunoo arches an eyebrow, mostly out of concern, "You sure? You and Heeseung can take a walk, I'll bring Jungwon back."

"I'll be fine, Sun." Jay reassures him, "You and Heeseung...have fun."

Sunoo's cheeks flush a faint shade of pink, but he manages to nod his head and reply, "Ok, fine. Text us if anything happens or if you need help."

"Got it."

"Thanks for coming, guys. Take care on your way back!" Heeseung says to his friends who disembark back into the dorms while he and Sunoo stay behind.

Sunghoon, Riki and Jake part ways and head to their dorm room, bidding Jay a goodbye. Sunghoon says "see you later" since they were technically Jake's roommates. Jay, with Jungwon piggybacked on his back, makes his way to the latter's dorm room. When they arrive by the door, Jay has no choice but to wake Jungwon because of the lock. The sleepy male manages to unlock the door, leading the way inside. The taller male makes Jungwon sit on the couch as he fetches a glass of water.

While Jungwon gulps it down, Jay helps him out of his shoes and the flannel shirt he wore over his plain t-shirt. He's aware of the tension that lingers, but again, he cares for Jungwon. He'd rather brave the tension and steel himself than leave a tipsy Jungwon alone. Once he has Jungwon settled, he sits next to him on the couch. "All good? Do you need anything?" he asks, amused at how it takes the other male a second to process things.

"I'm not that drunk." Jungwon defends, "Just sleepy."

This prompts another chuckle from Jay, causing Jungwon to look at him with a defensive pout. The former smiles gently before ruffling the latter's hair, "I'll wait for you to get settled. Once you're ok, I'll go back."

"I'm fine, really." Jungwon protests, throwing his head back on the couch, "I'm sober enough to function."

"Are you?"

"1+1 is two."

"Basic."

At this, Jungwon laughs. Jay looks at him fondly, shaking his head at how ridiculous this seemed. Still, if he could make Jungwon laugh like that, he was more than satisfied. "So, can I go back now? You can handle everything? I'll need to make sure Jake isn't giving Sunghoon and Riki a hard time." he grins.

Jungwon ponders for a moment; it's been a while since and Jay were able to spend time together, but it would be selfish of him to hold the male here when he was probably just as tired from their night out. It would be selfish of him to ask Jay to stay when he knows there are still things unsaid lingering in the air. It would be selfish of him to keep Jay here with a temptation brewing inside him, knowing he'll just regret it later.

Humming and lost in thought, Jungwon wonders if he should indeed be selfish tonight.

He wasn't drunk, just tipsy. Sober enough to function.

But not sober enough to make logical decisions, it would seem.

The little ounce of alcohol in his system takes control, clouding his judgment as it makes him move without hesitation - move onto Jay's lap, specifically.

Jungwon straddles the male, looking down at him with hazy eyes. Jay can only stare up, confused. His heart is hammering against his chest, but he makes no move to push Jungwon away; he's gauging the other male and wanted to see what he was up to. Knowing Jungwon, this was probably a display of impulse before he'd fall asleep or something of that sort. Jungwon's random impulses barely last long, after all.

His curiosity is soon answered as Jungwon begins to pepper his face with feathery kisses. The feathery sensation makes Jay blush, but he doesn't dwell on it because the other male starts to speak. "I'm sorry for the other night." Jungwon says in between the kisses.

He kisses Jay's forehead, nose, cheek, eyelids - everywhere but his lips. "I'm sorry for the other night." he repeats, kissing the other male's nose.

"I'm-" Jay starts, "Can you elaborate-"

But Jungwon's lips are suddenly on his, kissing him exactly like the other night.

Jay's eyes widen for a second before fluttering shut. He knows he shouldn't be doing this; he should be the bigger man and stop whatever this was for their sake's, but Jungwon's lips were so soft and warm - so decadent, so inviting, so tempting.

And when Jungwon rests his hands on either side of his face, fingers gently tracing his jawline, lips silently begging for him, Jay feels the butterflies in his stomach erupting. It awakens something in him, and he finds it difficult to resist.

He kisses Jungwon back, now taking the lead. It's a messy and hungry kiss, lips harshly sliding against each other, tongues clumsily tangling. The sounds filling the room spur Jay on as he grips Jungwon's waist, squeezing as he tries to ground himself; if he doesn't, he's afraid kissing isn't the only thing he'll be doing tonight. The shorter male combs his fingers through Jay's hair, pulling him impossibly closer. Nothing fills Jungwon's thoughts except the way Jay's lips feel so irresistibly good on his. He feels drunk not on alcohol, but with the way Jay's tongue swipes at his bottom lip before crawling into his mouth.

Jungwon wraps his arms around Jay's neck, pressing himself hard against the male below him. He lets a whimper slip past his lips when the other male's tongue brushes his own, slow and firm. Fully letting himself go, Jungwon starts to roll his hips softly.

Jay groans at the friction, but the other male's sudden gesture is also exactly what pulls him back to reality. He pulls away from the kiss, breathless as his hands immediately grip Jungwon's hips. "Won, wait." he says quickly.

The other male whines, refusing to stop. Jay takes a deep breath and exerts more effort, forcing the latter's hips to stop moving against him. "Jungwon, stop." he commands, cupping Jungwon's cheek to get his attention, "Stop it."

Jungwon ceases his movements and stares at Jay with glassy eyes. The taller male curses in his head - he wants this more than anyone. He wants to have Jungwon all to himself, doing all these things and so much more. But he doesn't want it like this, not when Jungwon is still a bit tipsy. Not when Jungwon hasn't given him his answer.

Not when he knows Jungwon will eventually snap out of this trance, regretting everything and leaving him hanging. Again.

"Won," Jay carefully starts, thumb caressing the other male's cheek, "You know I'd drop everything to do this - to continue this - with you. I really would. But I'm not doing that until your head's clear...until you tell me what we are."

"We're friends...right?" Jungwon says so softly, Jay barely hears it.

Jay lets out a broken chuckle, "Friends don't make out, Won. They don't..." he gestures to their position, looking down but trying not to bring up the visible tension now present on their lower bodies, "...do this."

Jungwon blinks, clearly lost in thought. Jay removes his hand from his cheek in favor of holding the latter's hand. With their fingers laced together, he continues to speak.

"You drive me crazy, Jungwon. You do all these things that make me go crazy. It's like you strike a match with the intention of setting me on fire, only for you to blow it out. I give my all to you, but I don't know if you're mine. It's a bit unfair, don't you think?"

When he hears those words, Jungwon immediately recalls what Sunoo told him before.

"If you keep prolonging this, you're just leading him on. He needs to know if he can cross that line, or stay behind it. You're both going to get hurt if you keep holding on to this whole 'blurred line' thing."

"If we do this, you'll think it's a mistake again, won't you? It's a dream come true for me, but a mistake for you." Jay says, and Jungwon hates that he can hear the pain in his voice.

I would stay forever if you (say) say, "(Don't) don't (go) go"
Jungwon feels the headache coming; it's not from the drinking, that's for sure. He closes his eyes and slowly gets off Jay's lap before settling next to him on the couch. "Right." he starts slowly, "You're right. This was a mistake, we should never have done this. We're just friends."

"I'm sorry again." Jungwon says, "I'm sorry I did something stupid again, we're just friends. I shouldn't have done this to you."

Jay remains calm, watching the way Jungwon tries to battle with his thoughts and words. Despite the ache in his heart, Jay manages to still smile as he speaks, "It doesn't have to be like this, Jungwon. We don't have to be just friends. It doesn't have to be a mistake."

Jungwon opens his eyes when he feels Jay's fingers holding his chin, gently guiding him to look at him. "My feelings remain, Jungwon. I still like you, and that hasn't changed." Jay confesses again, a melancholic smile on his lips, "I just need to know you want this as much as I do."

Sunoo said Jay was one of the most patient and understanding people ever, and that he'd be more than willing to go on this journey with him, even when it gets rough. Jungwon knew that. Of course he did - he knew that more than anyone.

So why was it so difficult for him to believe? Why was it so hard for him to admit he felt the same? Why was it so difficult to take that leap of faith, knowing Jay would be there to catch him?

It shouldn't have been so difficult. The confusion scares Jungwon, and it frustrates him how he can't think straight - how no matter how hard he tries, he can't think of a concrete reason as to why he's like this. His mind is blank, but at the same time filled with so many tangled lines creating incoherent noise.

With his fingers still gingerly holding Jungwon's chin, Jay releases a deep breath and speaks. "My feelings won't change, Jungwon, but don't worry. That's my responsibility to bear and not yours." he begins carefully, "But...I can't keep this up without knowing where we're heading."

"What..." Jungwon says, voice quiet and weak.

"The ball is in your court now, Jungwon." Jay says, "You can ask me to stay, or you can ask me to go. If you ask me to stay, I'll take it as a sign that you feel the same, and that we...can be more than friends. If you ask me to go, then I'll respect that and continue being your best friend. You don't have to worry about me because as I said, these are my feelings to bear. I'll still be happy being your friend. Being rejected won't change the fact that I care about you."

"I can't make that decision right now." Jungwon's voice shakes, eyes pooling with tears, "I don't know what to choose. I...I'm- it's frightening."

Jay smiles sadly, "I know it is, but we can't keep being like this, Jungwon. I want more than anything to love you as more than a friend, but if that's not what you want, who am I to demand it, right? We can't keep skirting around and acting like this one moment, only for one of us to stop and push each other away because 'we're just friends'."

"If you don't want to hurt Jay - and yourself, you need to be clear and make that decision at some point."

Sunoo had said that, right? And Jungwon knows the easiest decision would be him finally being honest with himself and admitting that he felt the same, right?

But the fear of jumping into unknown territory grabs him from within. The idea of things changing without certainty of the future makes logical Jungwon scared because what if his worries come to life?

What if at some point, he does mess up and he loses a lover and a best friend at once?

Jay leans his forehead against Jungwon's, voice dropped to a low and gentle whisper. "Tell me not to go, Jungwon. Ask me to stay with you." he says, silently pleading with the other.

Jungwon wishes he was stronger. He wishes he could say what his heart truly felt.

But fear, anxiety and uncertainty are complex things that aren't so easily expressed; they're difficult to figure out. They're a mess of lines and scribbles and whispers that make you feel things that can't always be explained logically.

Has love always been this scary?

Tears fall as Jungwon keeps his eyes on Jay's piercing gaze. "You're my best friend, Jay." he says, breath shaky and broken as he continues, "But I can't ask you to stay right now. I'm sorry."

Jay understands. He always does. He also knows that Jungwon's confusion and apprehension is valid. Even without Jungwon saying it, Jay can tell that his mind was still in a frenzied mess, trying to figure things out and grasp certain things he wasn't familiar with. He truly does understand and will never hold it against his beloved friend.

But he is also hurt.

"It's ok." Jay urges himself to smile, using his finger to carefully wipe Jungwon's tears away, "It's ok, Jungwon."

He reassures Jungwon. He always does.

"Get some sleep, ok? You had a long night." he whispers before ruffling the other male's hair.

Jay stands up and excuses himself, but of course, not without reminding Jungwon to drink lots of water and sleep as soon as possible. He tells the other to text him in the morning if he needs anything for a potential hangover - or for anything, really.

Because whether they were more than friends or just friends, he still cares. He always will.

And so he says a warm "good night" and leaves the room, heading for his own.

When Jay returns to his dorm, Jake is already fast asleep in his room. Apparently, Riki had crashed in their dorm as well and had fallen asleep in the Aussie's room. Sunghoon sat on the couch, looking up from his phone the minute Jay walked through the door.

The shorter male looks fine - presentable and composed as always. But Sunghoon knows his friend - he can see the exhaustion and hurt in his sharp eyes. With a sympathetic smile, he pats the spot next to him, "Do you need some of Sunghoon's super sweet and effective hugs?"

"What the heck is that?" Jay can't help but laugh despite feeling drained.

"I'll have you know these biceps are perfect for hugging." Sunghoon says matter-of-factly.

Jay shakes his head in amusement before sitting next to his friend. "I'll pass on the hug." he grins, "But someone to talk to would be nice."

The taller male smiles, locking his phone and placing it on the coffee table. "Fire away." he says while getting comfortable on the couch.

When Sunoo pushes the door to his dorm open, he expects to see the lights off, Jungwon probably asleep in his room. He does not expect to see his friend curled up on the couch with soft sobs coming out of him. He highly doubts Jay did anything to hurt him, so his mind can only think of one possible reason that caused this; he decides not to think about it for now and chooses to console his friend.

Sunoo sits next to Jungwon and gently rubs his back. "Hey." he starts, choosing his words wisely, "Wanna talk?"

His friend only shakes his head, sniffling and stifling another sob. "Are you sure about this? You're only hurting yourself, Jungwon." Sunoo says carefully. His tone is firm but gentle, nothing but concern lacing his voice.

It takes Jungwon a moment to respond. "I feel so stupid." he blurts out.

Sunoo offers a sad but comforting smile, "You're not stupid, Yang Jungwon. Just a bit lost and confused, but not stupid."

"Why can't I just tell him I like him?"

"Easier said than done." Sunoo answers, "Sometimes you just feel like nothing makes sense even if the answer is staring at you right in the face."

"Jay probably hates me now."

"I highly doubt that."

Jungwon sighs, rubbing his eyes, "I like him. But my brain keeps saying that's not something I should get into. It knows it can and it should...but it won't."

Sunoo pulls his friend in for a hug and says, "You'll figure it out. I know you will."

"I hope so."

It isn't intentional or deliberate, but Jay and Jungwon don't see each other again for the next few days. They don't go out of their way to make sure their paths don't cross, but they don't go out of their way either to see each other. It's easy for Jay, he thinks, because he has his majors and the student government to distract him. He busies himself with work, thankful that the tasks he has provide a temporary distraction for his mind.

It's not that he doesn't want to see Jungwon - he does. But he thinks they both need space to "process" whatever happened that night. He knows that if he shows himself to Jungwon, acting like nothing happened, it would just make things more difficult for the other. And, it would make it harder for him to get over his romantic feelings.

Jay is in the government office, working on tasks that Yunjin assigned to him. The president herself was in class while Chaewon, Taehyun and the other members were out somewhere on campus to oversee one of the events. Jay is so hyper-focused on typing things on the laptop that he doesn't notice Sunoo entering and placing an iced americano on the table for him.

"You've been working non-stop." Sunoo says as he sits next to the male, "Take breaks."

"I'm fine." Jay responds, eyes never leaving his laptop screen.

"We both know you're just using work to distract yourself from the heartbreak...and that's not the way to go about it." Sunoo says sassily, but Jay knows it was his friend's way of showing concern.

Jay stops typing and faces the other male. "What heartbreak? I'm fine. Really. Don't worry so much, ok?" he assures him.

Sunoo sips on his latte before leaning back on the seat. His eyes are filled with worry as he looks directly at Jay and says, "I don't think you ever got to process what you felt after that night. You jumped right back into being busy and buried it all away."

"I'll be fine." Jay tries to convince his friend with a signature smirk, "You know I will."

But Sunoo was probably the most introspective one in their group of friends; he tended to be the voice of reason many times. "I most definitely know you will," he begins to say, "but you still need to deal with it, not run away from it. Anyway, do you still have classes?"

"I'm done for the day."

The shorter male Sunoo flashes Jay a knowing grin before grabbing his wrist and pulling him up on his feet. "You know what you need? A breather! Some fun!" he laughs, "And I know just what to do!"

"Sunoo, I really don't-" Jay tries to protest, chuckling.

"Nope. You're coming with me, vice pres."

Sunoo manages to drag Jay to the mall where they both spend most of the time shopping - or window shopping anyway. Jay still ends up buying some clothes though. Afterwards, they sit down and relax in one of the restaurants for an early dinner.

While eating, Sunoo carefully brings the topic up. "Have you spoken to him ever since?" he asks.

Jay calmly answers, "Nope. I honestly don't mind reaching out, but Jungwon probably isn't ready to talk to me that soon."

"True." Sunoo nods in agreement, "Are you ok with everything? Sunghoon did say you spoke to him that night, but I never got to personally ask how you are and all that."

Jay gives his friend an appreciative smile. "I'm fine." he starts before correcting himself, "I mean, it does hurt a bit, but it's not something I can change, right? This is how I feel, and that is how Jungwon feels. Who am I to oblige him to reciprocate? If he wants to be friends, then that's fine with me. It's better than being strangers."

"Would you say this changes things?" the other male ponders, picking at the salad on his plate.

"Not really." Jay answers honestly, "We'll just continue being friends. I'll probably just stop...being so touchy-feely with him."

"Stop cuddling and holding hands?" Sunoo lightly teases, prompting an airy laugh from the other male.

"Yes, that." Jay grins, "It'll just...go back to how we were before I realized I liked him. But I do have to ask..."

Sunoo nods, gesturing for Jay to continue. "You're Jungwon's other best friend." the taller male starts, "Did he really not...have any romantic feelings for me? It sounds so egotistical and narcissistic but yeah. Just curious."

"It's not egotistical or narcissistic, you silly. Jungwon did kind of give mixed signals with how he was so affectionate and all. That's why I told him to be more clear and upfront with you." Sunoo chuckles lightly, "But it's not really my place to say how he felt. All I can tell you is that the idea of liking you - his best friend - was something that scared him for one reason or another. He was afraid that he'd mess things up and lose you not just as a lover but even as a friend."

"Hmm. I see."

"He has these complex thoughts that he can't fully comprehend." Sunoo shares, "But I think we - or you, rather - should just give him some time. I'm not saying he'll suddenly say 'I like you' back, but...he'll figure things out with you eventually. Will you be ready to accept whatever he says when his mind's 100% clear?"

"Of course." Jay smiles, "I'll love him either way."

With Sunoo and Jay currently out and about, the rest of their friends were also busy; Sunghoon was rehearsing with Wonyoung and the other film majors while Jake and Riki were in the art studio to work on their project outputs. Thankfully, Heeseung was more relaxed now that his final thesis was almost completed. He could take it easy and had more free time.

So when Jungwon messaged their group chat, asking if anyone could help him with errands, the eldest male willingly offered. He accompanied Jungwon as the younger did some grocery shopping to stock up on snacks and food for his and Sunoo's dorm. They stopped by a cafe for some quick coffee before returning to the dorm.

While fixing things in the kitchen, the older male suddenly speaks up. "So...Wonnie," he starts, "you owe me some catching up."

"I don't." Jungwon pouts, putting the carton of milk in the refrigerator.

Heeseung chuckles, "The Jungwon I know is usually bright and cheerful. Not that you're not allowed to be sad, of course. It's just...I know something's bothering you."

The younger male shakes his head. "I'm just a bit tired, that's all." he sighs.

"Majors? Org work? Professors?" the elder guesses.

Jungwon winces, biting his lip as his mind automatically thinks of Jay. Heeseung puts a hand on his shoulder and squeezes. "I won't push." Heeseung smiles gently, "You don't have to tell me, but just remember that you can always talk to me when you're ready, ok?"

The younger male takes a deep breath before releasing it. "Can..." he begins before clearing his throat, "I think I messed things up with Jay." he inhales sharply again.

"How sure are you of that?"

"I just feel like I did." Jungwon says shakily, eyes brimming with tears.

Heeseung takes the male's hand and gently guides him to the table where they both sit down. "Jay likes me, and I...like him too." Jungwon states, "But I did the exact opposite and told him I just wanted to be friends."

"Why weren't you honest with him, considering Jay's deeply in love with you?" Heeseung asks; there was no judgment or disappointment in his tone, just gentleness and sympathy.

"I want what Jay wants to have, to be more than friends and all that." Jungwon admits, "But as I've told Riki and Sunoo, I'm afraid of losing him. What if I make the wrong move? What if in the long run, I mess things up and lose him, both as a lover and friend? I told Sunoo that it would be my greatest nightmare if Jay and I don't work out and we can't return to being best friends because things would be weird and awkward."

Heeseung nods, wanting to understand where his younger friend was coming from. "Do you know exactly why it's scary? Why it's so frightening to give it a try?"

Jungwon shrugs, "That's the thing. I try to explain my indecisiveness and fear, but at the end of it all, my mind's just...a jumbled mess of gibberish and incoherent thoughts. It's like the reason's there, but at the same time it's not. Just when I can grab it, it disappears into thin air and makes it seem like I'm just making excuses. Well...maybe I am. I really don't know anymore."

"You're the psychology major, aren't you?" Heeseung lightens the mood with a chuckle before turning serious again, "But really, what you feel is valid, Jungwon. I felt it too these past months. Well, not exactly in a relationship-context, but more in the 'anxiety of the future's uncertainty' type of way since I'm a senior graduating soon."

"It's a bit overwhelming, isn't it?" Jungwon smiles sadly.

"It is." Heeseung smiles softly to express his agreement, "Fear and anxiety are things we can't confine in a simple box - they're complicated things that like to mess with us. Oftentimes, they don't even make sense. That's just how it is; we don't always have to make sense of everything."

"Thank you for saying that." the younger male breathes out.

"Love is like that too." Heeseung says with a shy smile as if he was embarrassing himself with what he was going to say, "It messes with our heads, and sometimes, it doesn't make sense. It can be scary because we don't always understand it. But that's the beauty of it, isn't it? Love isn't something meant to be perfect and easy."

"You think so?" Jungwon asks meekly.

The older male shrugs, chuckling with flushed cheeks, "You think it was easy for me to get where I am with Sunoo right now? I mean, we're not official...but we're getting there. You know what I mean?"

"More or less."

"I had to take that leap, Jungwon. Both of us did." Heeseung explains, "Love is scary and it can be confusing and difficult. But sometimes, that one leap of faith is all it takes for everything to fall into place. From then on, you figure things out together, especially if you trust and believe in each other."

You figure things out together, especially if you trust and believe in each other.

"Thank you, Heeseung."

I would stay forever if you say, "Don't go"
The next day, Jungwon makes it his personal mission to find and confront Jay - to make things right. He knows he can easily text him, and Jay would reply, but Jungwon wants to talk to him personally. He doesn't call the male either, wanting it to be a surprise of sorts. So he asks Jake and Sunghoon instead.

"He said he'd be spending the whole day in the library." Sunghoon told him, "Study room or something, though I don't know which one specifically."

"Jay tends to stay in the rooms on the seventh floor though. Less people, less noise." Jake pointed out.

And so Jungwon quickly made his way to the library's seventh floor, carefully searching for the male he desperately wanted to speak to. He almost gives up as he sees no sign of Jay in any of the study rooms until he sees the one further into the more quiet corners. The study rooms often had their glass walls unobstructed to give a view of inside the room - or outside, if you were already inside.

But this one had the blinds down, and Jungwon immediately knew Jay was surely in this one - he liked having privacy especially if he needed to focus on his work.

Jungwon knocks, and when he hears a faint "yes?" in response, he opens the door and carefully peeks his head in. Jay wasn't working anymore - in fact, he was packing his laptop and things. He was probably about to leave already.

"Hi." he starts, testing the waters.

Jay replies, tone calm. "Hey." he offers a gentle smile, "I'd love to stay and chat, but you'll need to be quick 'cause I need to drop by the government office. I'm so sorry."

"Of course." Jungwon sucks in a deep breath, trying to calm his nervous heart. He breathes out, hoping he says the right things and doesn't make a bigger mess, "I wanted to apologize."

Jay looks at him, and Jungwon can tell he was a bit confused, so he continues, "I'm sorry for the other night. I know I was being stupid and reckless with my behavior, but it shouldn't be an excuse to have done all that. I really am sorry for behaving that way."

"It's fine." Jay offers another small smile, "Like I said, we can put it behind us and move on from it. You don't need to-"

"Wait." Jungwon swallows the lump in his throat. He hates how dry it feels right now, but he presses on, "I'm sorry for confusing you with all the mixed signals. I'm sorry for being unclear with my intentions and feelings. In trying to make sense of what I was feeling, I didn't realize I was hurting you. Don't say you're fine because I know you got hurt, and I'd never forgive myself for that. I really am sorry, Jay. I was selfish."

"Wanting to figure out your feelings isn't selfish, Jungwon." Jay replies with an understanding smile, "But thank you. I know it wasn't easy for you to say all this."

Jay can see how shaky Jungwon's eyes were; how he balled his hands into fists to keep himself calm. He wants nothing but to pull the shorter male into his arms and give him a comforting hug. But he's afraid that if he does so, his heart isn't going to calm down. His feelings will just keep growing when he's supposed to be moving on. He'll just keep falling and falling and falling.

So to "protect" himself, Jay gives the male a friendly smile and says, "I'm not mad or anything, Jungwon. Not even upset. We can still be friends and hang out like usual. Nothing changes, right?"

Jungwon remains silent, expression unreadable as he looks anywhere but at Jay's eyes. A million thoughts are swimming in his head, and he tries his best to organize everything so he can finally say the right thing.

The taller male sighs and scratches the back of his neck while chuckling softly, "I'll need to go ahead...I need to drop something off at the government office." he excuses himself.

Jungwon still hasn't spoken. Jay patiently smiles before offering his hand, "Friends?"

The shorter male takes his hand but remains silent. His grip is soft and gentle as if he thought he didn't even deserve to be holding Jay's hand. The taller male can tell he was shaking a bit, probably due to him being nervous. Jay doesn't want to rush things, even if they were just "making up". He doesn't want to scare Jungwon with any sudden gestures or words. Jungwon looked like fragile glass that would break if he was too assertive or direct.

So he simply smiles as warmly as possible before whispering a soft "see you later".

Jungwon feels his heart stop when Jay starts to move towards the door. He can't let this happen without him saying how he truly feels. He can't let Jay go again, not when he's finally ready to face and admit his feelings. He can't let him go out the door and close it - if he does, Jungwon fears he'll never have the chance to be this brave again.

Jay reaches for the doorknob, but before he can do so, he feels a weight holding him back. He feels a pair of arms around him.

Jungwon is hugging him from behind.

Jay swallows, trying to still his beating heart. "What's wrong?" he asks, voice low and cautious.

"Don't go."

Jay furrows his eyebrows in confusion, unable to hear because the other male practically mumbled his words, "Pardon? I can't-"

"Don't go." Jungwon repeats louder this time, voice breaking as he lets those two words out.

Everything he's kept bottled up now breaks free in the form of tears. Jungwon had bottled his feelings and stresses, and now that he finally confronted them, it felt overwhelming. Satisfying, but oh-so overwhelming. It's taken its toll on him, a surge of emotions raging inside. He didn't know holding it in would hurt so much, but he's glad he's finally letting it free.

The taller male can feel the latter shaking, gentle hiccups leaving him. Jay doesn't need to look back to know that Jungwon was crying. He carefully turns around, removing Jungwon's arms from around his waist so he could face him properly. Tears stream down Jungwon's flushed cheeks, eyes glassy and wet from the sudden outpour. His lips quiver as he struggles to keep his sobs in, avoiding eye contact with the taller male. His chest feels so constricted and heavy, but he knows he has to be strong - he has to do this.

Seeing Jungwon in this state breaks Jay's heart, and he wishes more than anything to make the precious boy smile again. He cups Jungwon's face ever so tenderly as if handling fine porcelain; the mere gesture makes the shorter male release more tears, but he urges himself to speak despite sounding broken and breathless.

"Don't go." Jungwon says for the third time, a sob rattling his frame, "Please."

"I'm right here." Jay shushes him gently, using the pad of his thumbs to gently wipe the tears away.

"Please. I'm so sorry." Jungwon says in between the sobs, "I'm so sorry, please don't go anymore."

He repeats the words again and again, sobbing harder each time. Jay's heart tightens at the sight of the person he loved most breaking down.

"I'm not going anywhere, Won. I'm right here, see?" he whispers as gently as possible, loving eyes never leaving him as he strokes the skin of his cheek, "Just right here."

And then he hugs him. Embraces him so lovingly like it was the only thing that would keep Jungwon in one piece. Warm and tight like comfort and safety embodied.

They stay like that for a few minutes as Jungwon lets out his sobs. Jay patiently waits, rubbing his back in gentle motions. At some point, he reaches for Jungwon's nape and massages the area to soothe the male. It works, because eventually, Jungwon calms down and his breathing evens out.

"I'm sorry," Jungwon starts once he's steadied himself, "for lying to you."

"You didn't really lie, Jungwon."

"No, Jay. I did." the shorter male admits, "I've been lying to myself and therefore lying to you."

The other male lets him continue. "I've liked you all this time, but I was too scared to admit it. So many things were going through my head at that time, and it made everything so confusing and scary. It was too overwhelming, and instead of trying to figure things out with you, I chose to run away and decided to stay friends because I thought that would be the easy way out. I realize now that that was clearly a mistake and that it made things worse. It made me hurt myself. It made me hurt you which was the last thing I wanted to do." Jungwon bares it all out, expressing everything he wasn't able to before.

"I tried to justify and explain things but couldn't come to any clear conclusion. So I thought that was it, the end of the road. Then Heeseung said something that made me realize that my feelings of fear and anxiety were indeed valid. He said we don't always have to make sense of everything - fear, anxiety, love - all of that. But he also said that while you can't always make sense of things, you can figure it out together, especially if you trust and believe in each other."

Jungwon finally looks into Jay's eyes, gaze soft and clear. "I trust and believe you. I want to figure this out with you. I want to be by your side while we navigate these feelings we have for each other." he confesses, "I want to be yours."

Jungwon feels like his nerves are on fire with how nervous he was, heart thumping against his chest and stomach doing all sorts of flips. He feels like the ground should be swallowing him any time soon, but the warm and loving smile on Jay's lips comforts him.

He shyly asks, "Am I too late?"

Jay chuckles, his smile now turning into his signature smirk as he gently places his hands on Jungwon's waist. He gives it a squeeze before slowly leaning in, pressing a brief and chaste kiss on the latter's lips. "Better late than never, don't you think?" Jay softly laughs, the sound music to Jungwon's ears.

"Better late than never." Jungwon repeats, a slow smile gracing his lips. The stars glimmer in his eyes, Jay feels a sense of pride knowing he hung them there.

"May I?"

"Please do."

And Jay leans in again, kissing Jungwon properly this time. No hesitation, no second thoughts, no holding back. He kisses the male slow and lovingly, pouring all his emotions into the way he moves his lips in an intimate dance. Jungwon brings his arms around Jay's neck, pulling him closer as if leaving any space between them was a crime. As every second passes, the kisses being exchanged grow in passion, escalating further and hungrier.

Jay lets his bag drop from his shoulder to the floor as he carefully maneuvers them backwards until Jungwon hits the small study table. The taller male gently lifts Jungwon onto the surface, lips never leaving the other's as he settles between his legs. Jay continues to kiss with fervor, lips warm and wet as they constantly claim Jungwon's with desperate desire. He lets Jay lead the kiss, humming in delight as he savors the way he enters him, tasting every inch of his mouth. Neither of the two lose fervor, taking each other's breaths and gasps away with each kiss.

Jungwon smoothly glides his hands over the sides of Jay's neck, going along the slope of skin before resting them on the latter's shoulders. Jay runs his hands up and down Jungwon's waist before stopping at his hips. He gives it a light massage, prompting the shorter male to release a contented sigh as he arches his back, pressing himself further against the man who kisses him like nothing else mattered.

Jungwon has lied to himself, held back on his true feelings and pretended like he never wanted Jay the way the latter wanted him.

But in reality, this is what he wanted - all he wants is Jay, and Jay is all he wants.

To love and to be loved by Jay. To be together through the good and bad. For Jay to be his, and for him to be Jay's.

They pull away for air, breathless and panting with their cheeks flushed and hot. When Jay smirks against his lips, Jungwon can't help but chuckle. He then runs his fingers through Jay's hair, the motion smooth and gentle.

"I'm sorry I let you go, I won't do it again." Jungwon whispers softly, eyes filled with their usual starriness, "So please don't go. Just stay with me."

"I'm not going anywhere. I'll be with you always, for as long as you'll have me." Jay pecks his lips, smiling as he responds, "I love you."

"I love you too."

And this time, Jungwon leans forward to kiss Jay, slow and tender as his fingers idly comb through his hair. Jay deepens the kiss, parting the latter's lips with his tongue once again. His attention then shifts to Jungwon's neck, trailing kisses along until his lips reach the area near the back of his ear.

Jungwon cheekily grins, the mischievous glint back in his eyes. "Didn't you say you were going to drop by the student government office?" Jungwon inquires.

"Yeah," Jay smirks against Jungwon's skin, giving his ear a teasing nibble before adding, "but Yunjin won't mind if I'm a few minutes late. She'll understand."

"Using the 'vice president card', huh?" Jungwon giggles.

"Yes." Jay chuckles, moving from Jungwon's ear to place a kiss on his jaw then a peck on his lips, "Yes, I am."

Jungwon cups his face and continues to kiss the man who's been so patient and understanding of him. The man who loved and continues to love him.

The man who never left.

The man who is here to stay.

+1

Chapter 2: Say Don't Go - bonus chapter

Summary:

Remembering the night they went drinking, Jay and Jungwon continue from where they left off.
Notes:

As mentioned previously, this chapter is a bit more adult-ish! It's not explicit, but things do get heated, per se. Just leaving this as a heads up! Enjoy~
Chapter Text
1 month later
Jay was sitting on the couch in Jungwon's dorm room, laptop on his lap as he did some research for a business paper he was writing. Jungwon was beside him, flipping through the pages of his textbook. The two studied and worked with a comfortable silence until a random and sudden thought floated into the latter's mind.

"Jay?"

"Hm?"

Jungwon closes his textbook before placing it on the coffee table. "Do you remember back then...when we went drinking with Heeseung 'cause his project was approved, then you brought me back here?" he asks slowly.

The other male hums. "Yeah, why?" Jay stops typing and looks up from his laptop.

"Remember..." Jungwon trails off before shifting on the couch so he could look at Jay better, "when I kissed you, and you kissed back? When...I..."

Jay raises an eyebrow and smirks, "When you got all heated up and started grinding on me?"

"Stop!" Jungwon blushes, "It sounds so embarrassing!"

"You're the one who brought it up!" Jay laughs before clearing his throat, "Why'd you ask though?"

Jungwon pouts his lip, going through his thoughts and pondering for a few seconds before staring directly at Jay with sparkly eyes. "What if we...continued where we left off?" he asks cautiously, not wanting to make Jay uncomfortable.

The other male takes note of the eager glint in Jungwon's eyes as well as the shade of pink that dusts his cheeks. Technically, there was nothing to be shy about regarding what the shorter male was suggesting. Jay and Jungwon have shared a lot of intimate kisses, teasing touches and make out sessions ever since they became official, but perhaps the idea of continuing something a bit bolder was what got Jungwon blushing and shy.

Jay smiles gently, but a mischievous look still brews in his eyes. "Do you want to," he closes his laptop and places it on the coffee table as well, "Wonnie?"

Without wasting another second, Jungwon clambers onto Jay's lap and wraps his arms around the latter's neck. "Why are you laughing?" he asks with a pout.

"You're so cute." Jay kisses his jaw briefly, "And pretty."

"Flirt."

"Mhmm." the taller male buries his face into Jungwon's neck, smirking against the skin, "My baby kitty cat."

Jungwon smiles fondly before humming, moving his hands to cup Jay's face and make him look into his eyes, "I'm all yours, Jongseong."

Jay wastes no time in crashing his lips against Jungwon's, immediately starting with passionate kisses. The shorter male isn't one to back down, returning the fire with the same amount of heat. Jungwon cards his fingers through Jay's hair, nibbling on the other male's lip before trailing his kisses down to his sharp jaw. The feather-light kisses scattered across the skin causes Jay to chuckle, letting Jungwon do as he pleases.

But he takes the lead again, cupping Jungwon's face as he directs his lips onto his. He kisses aggressively but is still careful to handle the shorter male with tender gentleness. Jay bites Jungwon's bottom lip, earning a whimper from the latter. He swipes his tongue across the swollen flesh before slipping past Jungwon's parted lips. Jay's tongue is bold and fiery, mapping the latter's mouth like a thirsty explorer. His strong arms wrap around the shorter male's waist to pull him closer.

Jungwon feels a shot of pleasure course through his veins when Jay languidly sucks on his tongue at the same time his hands slip under his shirt to caress his waist, the roughness of Jay's palms against his skin so hypnotizing; Jungwon can't help but moan at the feeling of it all, head spinning in bliss. He drags his hands across the latter's chest, then to his shoulders, then rests them on either side of Jay's neck as he allows the man below him to breathe in his whimpers as they continue to kiss."

"You drive me so insane." Jay pulls away, breathing hotly against the other male's lips.

Jungwon's eyes are half-lidded and filled with hazy desire as he peers at the latter, "You think it's any easier for me?"

Jay simply chuckles in response before diving in for more kisses. He carefully removes Jungwon's shirt and tosses it somewhere on the floor; the other male follows suit, fisting Jay's shirt before doing the same thing. Bodies flush against each other, skin on skin, Jungwon suddenly feels like the room is hotter than usual despite the fact that the airconditioner was turned on. It doesn't help that Jay's hands roam the expanse of Jungwon's skin - touching, caressing and squeezing anything within his reach.

When the taller male's hand brushes against Jungwon's chest, the latter moans into Jay's mouth. He repeats the gesture several times, relishing in the way Jungwon breathlessly mewls into his mouth, not even able to keep up with the kisses properly. When Jay's hand settles against his chest, fingers playing with a part Jungwon never knew would feel so, so, so extremely good, he fully disconnects from the kiss to throw his head back. Jay takes the chance to nuzzle at his neck before dropping wet kisses along the slope of skin. Jungwon's head spins like crazy when the other male starts sucking and licking near his throat, fingers still pleasuring his chest.

Tension building between the both of them, Jungwon can't hold it in anymore and starts to roll his hips against Jay's. The latter growls into Jungwon's mouth, and it encourages him to slightly quicken his movements. The shorter male begins to kiss Jay again, moans spilling out ceaselessly as the other male's thumbs roll his now sensitive buds around. Jungwon can feel the growing tent in Jay's pants, so he decides to tease the male. "Aren't you going to do anything? Do I have to be the only one moving?" he giggles playfully, eyes sparkling with mischief.

Jay smirks against his lips, "I'm just taking it slow, baby."

Jungwon closes his eyes tightly as he slows his movements down but somehow manages to grind down harder, making sure to feel every drag of his member against Jay's. It drives the latter crazy as he bites his lip, hands now gripping Jungwon's waist tightly. He doesn't know if he wants Jungwon to quicken the pace, or if he's also enjoying the slow, deliberate drag of Jungwon's dick against his hard-on.

Unsure of which he prefers, Jay chooses to test something out - he bucks his hips up in a sharp motion several times. Seeing as to how it has the latter mewling and gasping in pleasure, Jay continues to meet Jungwon's hip movements with fervor. They both get into a steady back and forth rhythm, hips rocking and clothed dicks rubbing against each other so deliciously, it has the room filling with moans and gasps.

Jay hums and whispers raspily, "Does it feel good?"

Jungwon swallows hard, trying to form a coherent response in between the moans, "Mhmm. So good."

"You feel so good, baby." Jay smirks, licking into the latter's mouth.

The gesture paired with his deep voice has Jungwon arching his back in pleasure, hands running through Jay's messy hair and lightly gripping the strands. "More," the shorter male gasps, "Please, more."

Jay's hands find purchase on Jungwon's hips as he helps him move, guiding him to drag his hips harder and faster. At the same time, he speeds up and thrusts up with a more aggressive pace.

About to come undone, Jungwon wraps his arms around Jay's shoulder, holding the male flush against his sweaty skin as he moves his hips desperately. "Jay, I'm gonna-" he whimpers.

"Me too." Jay responds with a groan.

For a few more seconds, the pair move in complete sync, hips grinding and moans chorusing together. Jungwon chants Jay's name as he feels close; eventually, he cries in bliss when pleasure is released throughout his body, hands on the latter's shoulders so he can steady himself and not completely break apart at the surge of heat in his veins. Jay follows not too long after, gently biting down on the junction between Jungwon's shoulder and neck. He groans lowly, movements stuttering to a halt as he gently guides the other male's hips to ride out their highs.

Once they've caught their breaths and calmed down from their high, Jungwon leans his forehead against Jay's. "That was amazing." he laughs, smile shy yet bright.

Jay chuckles softly. "You're amazing." he replies, kissing both sides of Jungwon's cheeks.

"Round 2?" Jungwon teases, giggling when Jay throws his head back against the coach with a sigh.

"I still have a business paper to work on, you know?" Jay says, but his voice is filled with amusement.

The shorter male hums, fingers tenderly tracing the other male's jawline, "We can do it on my bed."

Jay has to bite his lip to suppress the smirk that was forming. "You're something else, Yang Jungwon." he breathes out.

Jungwon can only smile at his lover, warm and fond.

He lets out a laugh when Jay stands up with him in his arms, hands supporting his legs around his waist as if carrying him like a koala. He heads towards Jungwon's bedroom in silence then gently plops him down on the bed. Jay immediately situates himself between the latter's legs, and Jungwon warmly accommodates him while wrapping his arms around his neck.

Jay's hand lightly grips the buckle of Jungwon's belt before he flashes his signature smirk, "One more, then I really need to work on my paper."

"Ok," Jungwon grins giddily, "deal."

Notes:

Thank you for making it this far! Hope you enjoyed this little piece; I tried to make it as raw and real as possible, and I hope I got the necessary feelings across! The next chapter is a bonus, but it is more adult-ish so please proceed with caution!