At the lair, the rest of us watched the turtles who were re-acting the scene from their favorite show, Lou Jitsu.
"Man, 'Teriyaki Shakedown' always gets me so (inhales) jazzed!" Donnie said.
"Yeah, Lou Jitsu's the business!" Raph said.
"I can see why," Shade said.
The remote goes flying through the air and hits Raph in the face, knocking him down.
"Then why do you insult the master with your poor technique? Hot soup"! Splinter yelled as he leapt off the chair, spun in the air, and smashed into all three of his sons.
"Woah!" Lloyd exclaimed.
"Do not worry. Someday you will be great ninjas with a little practice . . . is something I would say if I were a liar," Splinter said as stood up while the turtles groaned.
"That's nice of you to say, Pop, but I'm tired of practicing," Mikey said.
"Yeah, we can be heroes like Lou Jitsu!" Raph said.
"Nice try," Splinter said as he walked away.
"We got the squillz, we got the tight color-coordinated team look," Mikey said as he turned towards Raph.
"Let's do it! Let's go out and bust some bad guys!" Raph said as he fist bumps Mikey.
"Yeah. I just feel like, you know, we need a case to get the juices flowing a little bit. You know, let's see what the internet has to say about it, shall we . . ." Donnie said while looking at his tablet.
Leo hops up from behind the easy chair and then flops over the back of it.
"Yo, Leo, we're gonna be heroes!" Mikey exclaimed.
"Okay, what's the plan? Solve the city's rat problem?" Leo said, sarcastically.
"Hey now. I am standing right here," Splinter said as his tail flashes out and smacks Leo in the face, knocking him off the chair.
"Pfft, no way. We're crime fighters! With the mafia family heroes on our side, we'll be unstoppable," Raph exclaimed.
"Okay, check this out. The Spine Breaking Bandit!" Donnie said while showing us his tablet.
"Oh! That's our cup of tea," Shadow said, gleefully.
"Yeah. Go big or go home!" Raph said.
"Yeah, go home on a stretcher. What else did you got?" Leo asked.
"Uh, okay, here's something. The Long Island Mangler!" Donnie replied.
"Oh! That's a good one," I said while growling with glee.
"Okay, Y/n. I appreciate you giving your enthusiasm, but maybe we should save mangling and spine breaking for, I don't know, our second day?" Leo asked.
"Fine," I groaned.
"Mm, well, this one's kind of lame. Someone stole paper from a delivery truck," Donnie said.
"Not on my watch! That's exactly the kind of junior level mischief we can put an end to," Leo said with triumph.
"Really? That'll make us heroes? But it's only paper," Raph said.
"Raph is right, Leo. How does paper make you guys heroes," Jewel asked.
"It's only paper?" Leo muttered.
"I'm so sorry. Guys, what did he just say? Did he say it's only paper?" He asked while laughing.
"Yup," Tails, Charmy, and Saffron replied.
"Did he say it's only paper?" Leo asked.
"Yes, he did," Silver replied.
"Okay! That's what they all say. You think the road to hero town is paved with real crime? No! It's paved with the tears of the poor paper man. And who helps that guy? I'll tell you who; we are who," Leo said while pacing.
"Yes!" The turtles yelled.
"They're gonna have a lot to learn," Blaze said.
"Yep, they do," Marine said.
Meanwhile we started running across the city's rooftops. We finally stop on one roof to look down. Don using his goggles.
"What kind of weirdo steals paper?" Vector asked.
"A dreamer. You look at a blank sheet and see nothing. They see possibilities . . . Ack!" Mikey exclaimed as Raph elbows him in the back.
"There's only one store they haven't hit yet, and it is right over there . . . oh, convenient," Donnie said.
"How 'bout we go stealth and make 'em wish they stole toilet paper?" Raph joked as we started chuckling.
We leap down. Street view of two thieves stealing paper, both with flames burning above their heads. All of us are bracing themselves suspended above the street between two buildings.
Mikey lands on Raph's shell and he loses his grip and falls. Cat shrieks. Leo and Don jump down after their brothers. Some of us went in opposite directions as turtles charged at them.
"Half of us, go left. Mikey and the other half, go right. I'll take the roof and swoop down like a boss!" Raph announced.
"Let us join in on that," Shadow said as some of us followed him.
Some of us chase the Foot Lieutenant. Mikey throws his Kusari-fundo at the Foot Brute, but it wraps around a fire plug as the Brute rounds a corner.
"Whoa!" Mikey exclaimed while flying around.
"Look out," I yelled until we landed ourselves in a pile.
"Where are they?" Sonic asked while groaning.
"That is you, right?" Tekno muffled.
"Swoopin' like a boss!" Raph, Shadow, Knuckles, Jet, Wave, Storm, Kai, Cole, Vector, and Amy yelled as they jumped off the top of the building.
"No, no, no!" Leo said while waving his arms.
"Guys, hold up! Hold up!" I exclaimed.
Raph and the others landed hard on all of us.
"Ow!" We all exclaimed.
We went off flying everywhere and the van screeched around a corner, back door open and paper flying all over. Van disappears.
"Uh, quick question. Did we seriously just get schooled by paper thieves?" Tails asked in anger.
"I don't swoop like a boss. I swoop like a noob," Raph said, sadly.
"Wrong, my friend. We swooped like a big boss," Vector said.
"Man, this seemed like a really cool idea until we didn't succeed at it," Mikey said, sadly.
"I knew we should've picked something extreme," I grumbled.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Where'd my brothers and friends go?" Leo asked as he got up.
"Mikey, Y/n, where's your . . . legendary optimism?" Leo asked as he pointed at me and Mikey with the pommel of his sword.
Mikey and I groan as a response.
"You guys, where's your, ya know, your go-getter attitude?" Leo asked as he turned to Raph, Shadow, Knuckles, Jet, Wave, Storm, Kai, Cole, Vector, and Amy
"And Donnie, Gadget, Tails, where's your . . . your thing, your – emotionless passion?" Leo asked as he points at Donnie, Gadget, and Tails.
"Here," They answered, quietly.
"We can still catch these lame old paper crooks and be heroes!" Leo exclaimed.
"Yeah, that's gonna be hard. This was the last paper store in town," Jay explained.
"Hmm . . . Or was it?" Leo said with a smirk.
"Please don't tell me that you're gonna put up a fake paper store," Cole asked.
A few minutes later...
"You just had to jinx it, do you," Zane asked while looking at the fake store.
"It's beautiful," Mikey said with glee.
"Do you really think that this is going to hook the thieves? The only paper we have is made from salami which is round. Paper is not round," Lanolin said, doubtful.
"Yes, it'll work. Raph, stop eating the plan!" Leo yelled.
Raph growls as he chews off a chunk of salami.
"Hi, I'm here for the job interview . . . aw no. Man, I thought it was weird to have a job interview at midnight," April said as she walked in.
We heard a sound of car approaching and then car lights flashing across them.]
"Ah, customers!" Mikey exclaimed.
"Quick, everyone hide!" I yelled.
All of us went to our hiding spots.
"Welcome to Leo's Paper Hut. Can I interest you in our . . . ah!" April exclaimed until a large hand closes over her face.
"What is 'mm-mm-mm'? She's supposed to say . . . paper!" Mikey said.
"Everyone, now!" Blaze yelled.
We got out of our hiding spots and saw April tied up and suspended from the ceiling.
"April! The salami paper! It's gone!" Mikey exclaimed.
The sound of the engine starting. Van backs up, turns around and drives off with the tires screeching.
"No way!" Charmy exclaimed.
Leo grunts and kicks the advertising board. Cardboard exterior falls down.
Binding comes undone and April drops to the ground.
"Ow," April said.
"This was supposed to be easy. How do we keep losing these clowns?" Leo asked.
"Leo, do you really think we would have let you make salami paper without putting a tracer in it?" Gadget asked.
Gadget presses a button on his gauntlet. Something starts beeping in Raph's stomach, making his stomach growl. Raph gasps and looks down.
"It's okay. I put two," Gadget said
Interior of the van shows stacks of 'paper'. Inside one stack Don's beeper flashes and beeps, unheard by the occupants as the van continues down the street. At a shipyard, we lay in wait. Leo is staring at something through binoculars.
"Okay guys, this is our moment. They may have given us the slip before . . ." Leo cuts off.
"Twice before!" Mikey corrected.
"Thank you, Mikey. Twice before, but now we've got them cornered and there's nothing that can stop us," Leo stated.
We watch paper being loaded into a ship via a conveyor belt of the interior of the ship. The hatch door wheel begins spinning. Raph rolls in first, thudding into a wall. Then Leo cartwheels inside and Raph rolls past him, slamming into something before rising. We stare down through an open hatch into the hull of the ship. Below them, the two Foot stand amongst piles and piles of stolen paper. Leo leaps into the hull first.
"Okay, twerp and . . . surprisingly big man. It's 51 against 2, so what say we just call it a day, right?" Leo said as we jumped down. Foot Lieutenant turns and then Foot Brute turns.
"Whoa! They've got footprints on their faces!" Mikey exclaimed.
"That's because they're part of the foot clan!" I yelled.
"You! I'm gonna grind your bones with my fists," Foot Brute said.
"Ooh, that's inspired. We're both gonna grind your bones," Foot soldier said.
"Right. Listen, bubs. Before we put our footprints on your faces, we gotta ask, what's with all the paper?" Zane asked.
The Foot Lieutenant grabs a sheet of paper and quickly begins folding it. Finishes by holding up a tiny paper ninja.
"Yay, arts and crafts!" Charmy cheered.
"I don't think it's just origami, Mikey," Ben said.
The Foot Lieutenant throws paper ninja at them. It transforms in midair, becoming as large as Raph. Origami Ninja rushes at them. Younger turtles dive out of the way, leaving Raph.
"Huh?" Raph said.
"Move out of the way, Damn it!" Shadow yelled.
Origami Ninja slams into him, knocking Raph back against a wall and leaving a crater in the wall.
"Save the amazement later! Time to scrap this origami!" Tails yelled.
Tails rushes the ninja. Swipes at it with his sword and it explodes into confetti.
"What the," Tails said, dumbfounded.
Some landed on the turtles. They all start groaning and spitting and swinging their arms as the particles rain down on them.
"Guys, it's just paper," Pixal said.
"Huh. Oh yeah," Raph said.
"Paper viscera," Donnie said.
"Guys, heads up! They're making more origami ninjas," Nya exclaimed.
Back to the Foot Lieutenant, who is forming more paper ninjas. Throws a handful at the turtles, all poof in midair to become full sized.
"Let's Cha Cha!" Honey exclaimed as we started charging at the ninjas.
Raph and the others leap at them, jumping and kicking and destroying them. Mikey was standing on a balcony, swinging his weapon and destroying a ninja. A ninja grabs the cord and yanks Mikey towards it.
"Mikey," Sonia exclaimed as Mikey hit the ground.
Two foot soldiers come at him and he swings the Kusari-fundo upwards. It wraps around a pipe and lifts him. He spins around and shreds the ninjas, then shoots an okay symbol with his hand. Leo is on the balcony, going backwards as he slices the ninjas coming at him. Leo jumps down on a stack of papers.
"Guys, we're getting nowhere fighting these guys. We gotta take out the source," I said.
Leo, Tails, and Ben leaps towards the Foot Brute, who also has a sword. Their swords clash and then they're swinging at each other. They slide back.
"Okay. You think you're pretty good, huh?" Ben asked.
"Indeed," Brute replied.
Tails kicks at his face. Foot Brute grabs his ankle, shoves it down, and then kicks Tails across the room. Tails land upside down.
"Tails," Cream exclaimed.
"He's good," Tails said.
The paper begins whirling in a cyclone around the two Foot soldiers.
"What?" Raph said.
"What the," Sonic exclaimed.
The paper forms into a huge ninja that growls. The Ninja reaches down and scoops up Leo, who strains but can't get out of his grip.
"Leo!" I exclaimed.
"Everyone, it's pinata time!" Raph yelled.
All of us charge at the ninja. It hits the floor, trying to punch them, but they dodge. When the fist that's holding Leo comes down, Don and Mikey pounce on it. They strain to hold on. The ninja growls and grabs them in its other hand.
We look from the ninja to the two Foot soldiers. We notice the Foot Lieutenant chuckling and smashing his fists together. When he does that, so does the huge ninja. The three trapped turtles are all groaning.
"Hero town! Population, Us!" Antoine yelled.
Foot Brute jumps in front of his Lieutenant. Raph plows into them, activating his force field. Bunnie grabs both of them and swings them around several times before releasing them. They fly screaming across the ship and hit a wall, both out cold. Raph looks with surprise at his tonfa, then looks up. The huge paper ninja starts to fall, releasing the turtles. It crashes and paper goes whooshing in all directions, much of it spilling off the ship. Ship's horn blasts. Interior shot; ship full of loose paper. We gasp as we pop out from under the paper.
"Huh?" Leo exclaimed.
Foot grunting as they push up through a paper pile. Foot Brute quickly forms an origami swan, realizes his mistake, and begins manipulating the paper again.
"Guys, they're making origami again," Jay exclaimed.
"Hm. Mikey, Blaze, Y/n, Kai, the sprinklers!" Leo commanded.
"On it!" Mikey, Blaze, Kai, I yelled.
We flung our weapons and powers at a sprinkler head. The sphere flames on and causes the sprinkler to activate. Alarms sound and water rains down on the paper. The paper becomes soggy and can't be formed into anything.
"You may have shredded our plans for now. But next time, you will feel the fury of a thousand feet!" Brute growls.
"Ooh, you're on fire today!" The Foot Lieutenant yelled.
Chuckling, he makes a form with the salami and tosses it at us. A dripping, sloppy form stalks towards them.
"Ew! That's nightmare fuel, man!" Mikey exclaimed.
"Guys, get ready," Pixal yelled as we went to our fighting pose.
Suddenly it splats to the ground into hundreds of individual salami slices.
"Okay, salami origami doesn't work," Vanilla said.
"Hey, look. They vanished," Tangle exclaimed as she pointed to a ladder. The Foot is gone.
"Then what are we looking at?" Whisper asked.
Raph stares at the pile of salami.
"Oh. What is that? Don't do it," Leo said.
"No," Donnie said as Raph walked closer to the salami.
"Don't do it. Don't do it," Rouge said.
"No," Jay said.
"Don't do it," I said.
"No. Raph, no!" Lloyd exclaimed.
"Oh!" Sonia exclaimed.
Raph scoops up a handful of salami.
"Look at me. No!" Donnie exclaimed.
Raph stuffs the salami in his mouth.
"No!" Donnie exclaimed.
"Ugh! Gross! Ugh. Oh," Mikey exclaimed.
"Oh, disgusting," Silver exclaimed as Raph started eating the salami.
"What? Five-second rule!" Raph said.
"So . . . Does this count as a win?" Mikey exclaimed.
"Well, I don't know. Let's think about it. Did the bad guys get their big supply of paper? Uh, no. Did they build their army of soldiers? (laughs) No. No, they didn't. Are they otherwise thwarted, and we unscathed?" Leo asked.
"Yes!" Turtles replied.
"Hero mission accomplished, my friends!" Leo cheered.
"Yeah!" Turtles cheered.
They all start rolling around on the paper together.
"We gotta go for something extreme next time," I said.
Everyone agrees with me.