A/N: English is not my first language, sorry if there are some mistakes. Also please take into account the trigger warning ⚠️.
TW: see the description.
As the girls sat talking about Jenna, I couldn't bring myself to care about the conversation, my mind was elsewhere. What was Wilden doing?
Hanna nudged me bringing me back to the conversation to find everyone staring at me.
"What?"
"Did you hear what I said? Ali was seeing someone that summer, it was an older guy that had a girlfriend." Spencer said.
"Oh."
"Oh?" Questioned Hanna. "You're not surprised? Did you know about this."
"I didn't know, but it doesn't surprise me, Ali used to hook up with older guys all the time." I said.
"What?!" Asked Emily. "How do you know?"
I shrugged. "Ali and I used to go to a lot of college parties together."
"Why didn't you tell us?"
"I once asked Ali why couldn't we invite you guys and well..."
"Well what?" Hanna insisted.
"Look you know Ali could be mean and I asked her to tell you about the parties—"
"Just spit it out, what did she say?" Asked Spencer.
I sighed. "She said you wouldn't be able to hold your liquor and that you wouldn't fit in and would only end up embarrassing her." There was an awkward silence. "I'm sorry guys."
"Don't apologize." My twin told me. "It's not your fault."
"At least were the parties good?" Aria asked, there was a hint of humor in her voice, but I couldn't bring myself to laugh.
"Truthfully, I wish I had never gone to a party without you guys."
<><><><>
We were having breakfast with mom as she finished the last of the milk. "That's the last of the milk." She said.
"It's on the list." I replied, as Hanna stared at the Tv. Wilden was giving a statement.
"The coroner did release his findings this morning, and although Alison Di Laurentis' body did show signs of a blunt-force head trauma, the cause of her death was suffocation."
I turn off the tv, I have already seen too much of Wilden I didn't need to see him on the Tv as well. "God that guy gives me the creeps." Hanna said.
"Well he didn't arrest you, so he can't be that bad." Ashley said.
Yes he can
"Are you okay going to school today?" Mom asked.
"Yeah. We'll be fine." I told her not really believing it myself.
<><><><><>
Cassie's outfit
was at my locker when someone called my name. "Hey Marin." It was Noel Khan.
I rolled my eyes. "Kahn." I greeted and tried to get away.
"Oh come on." He said blocking my escape. "Come on give me a chance, and if you hate it I'll leave you alone."
"Still No." I said.
"Why do you always run away from me. Is there something wrong with my face or something?"
"Your face is not the problem, is your personality that I have the issue with." I told him.
"So are you saying I'm cute." He replied cheekily.
"Oh my God. Take a hint Noel." Thankfully we heard the bell. "Oh shoot. As much as I would like to keep discussing the reasons why I will never go out with you. I have class."
"Will the following students please come to the office: Emily Fields, Aria Montgomery, Spencer Hastings, Hanna and Cassandra Marin."
As I walked to the headmaster's office a shiver went down my spine. Darren was there and signaled me to sit down with the rest of the girls. "So let's see... You thought you heard her scream." He asked Spencer.
"I-I said that, yeah."
"And when you four woke up in the barn, Alison was gone, and so was Spencer."
"Yes, I woke up before them, And I realized that Ali was missing, so..."
"So you went looking for her." Finished Wilden.
"That's what happened." Spencer said.
"I got that. So, what's up? Was this a slumber party, or...?"
"Is this an interrogation?" Questioned Spencer.
"No, just a routine follow-up. Why did you guys all fall asleep?" He said, but I knew him, he was fishing for something.
"I guess we were tired." Aria said.
"Tired? Really. Is that how you remember it, Cassandra?"
I swallowed hard trying to keep my voice as steady as possible. "Yeah. I mean that's what you do at sleepovers, you sleep."
"Yeah, you guys were tired." He repeated, still staring at me.
"Look, we've told you everything we know, just like we did the night she went missing." Spencer said.
"I know, and you see, the thing is, it's almost exactly what you said last year-- Almost like it was rehearsed."
This time Aria spoke. "Like Spencer said, we've told you everything we know."
As we headed out the office I told Hanna I would catch up with them later and ran to the bathroom and started pacing. I had nothing to hide about Alison's death and I had a feeling Wilden knew it too, but he suspected someone and he was like a dog with a bone. He wouldn't let go unless someone forced him.
I looked in the mirror and flashes of the night in Wilden's apartment came flooding back. How I had bite my lip until it bled to keep myself from crying out, but he didn't care, he didn't stop, he just kept going until I felt I was about to pass out.
I looked at the mirror again there were tears I didn't realized had fallen. I was trembling and I really wanted to smoke. Fuck I needed to calm down. My phone rang.
You're hot, but not even you can make murder charges go away. XOXO -A
<><><><>
I went back looking for the girls at lunch and saw Jenna was sitting with them.
Fuck no.
I headed to the football court. I was reading 'Little Women', it was my comfort book. "Cass?" I looked to see the guy I was once in love with, the guy who treated me like I was his world, the guy who broke my heart when he left without saying goodbye.
"Theo? What are you doing here?"
"Oh I came to see my brother." He said. I nodded, not really knowing what to say. The comfortable silence that used to be there was now replaced with awkwardness. "Can we talk?"
"What's there to talk about? I think you made yourself pretty clear when you left and I had to find out when Aria told me you were moving to Iceland."
"Can you at least let me explain? Please." I looked at him, but before I could respond Mike arrived.
"Theo! Hey. You came to watch the game? Hey Cassie" Theo didn't look at Mike yet, he kept his gaze fixed on me. And I didn't dare breaking eye contact.
"Please." He repeated.
"Fine." I said standing up. "Nice to see you again Mike, I have class." I gave Theo one last glance before walking away.
<><><><>
After class Hanna filled me in on what happened at lunch and I had never been more grateful for skipping it. She also told me Sean was coming over for a 'study date', although she was hoping they would 'seal the deal', so I didn't want to be anywhere near the house. Which meant I had no choice but to meet with Theo and talk.
Theo was wearing jeans and a hoodie. Damn it, why did have to look so good. "So you wanted to talk. Talk." I said. I wasn't trying to be mean but I thought I meant more to him, to at least deserve a goodbye. Okay maybe I was trying to be mean.
"I shouldn't have left without saying goodbye." I didn't say anything so he continued. "Before I left I went to your house, but I couldn't go in. I couldn't look at you in the eyes and tell you that I was leaving, so I left without telling you."
I looked down unable to meet his eyes. "First Alison went missing and I stopped talking to my friends, then you left and then my father left." I said with tears in my eyes. "So I figured it was my fault that everyone was leaving. I figured, if no one wanted to stay with me then I was the problem, that there was something wrong with me that made everyone leave me." That was when I started using drugs, even though I had my sister I felt so alone and drugs were my only escape.
Theo cupped my face whipping the tears with his thumbs. "There is nothing wrong with you."
"Then why did you leave?" I cried.
"I didn't have a choice baby. But I never wanted to hurt. I'm sorry." He said wrapping his arms around my waist. God I'd missed him.
But then I remember Wilden. How was I supposed to get involved with someone when he lurking on every corner, watching my every move.
I pulled away from the hug. "What's wrong?" He asked.
"We can't get back together." I said.
"Why? Are you already seeing someone?" He asked a little pissed, but I knew his anger wasn't towards me. He was jealous.
"No I'm not with anyone, but I'm messed up and I don't want to hurt you."
"You won't."
"I will."
"I don't want to loose you again."
"You won't, but I can't be with the way you want me to. At least not now."
"I can wait." He said.
"I can't ask you to do that."
"You don't have to. You are worth it."
<><><><>
After I left Theo I got a text from Wilden. 'My apartment NOW, unless you want the charges against your sister to come back.'
I knocked on his door dreading what was about to happen. "Thanks for coming." He said opening the door for me to come in.
"It's not like you gave me a choice now did you?" I said entering the apartment. "What do you want?"
"Oh come on, relax, have a glass of wine." He said opening a bottle.
"What do you want?" I repeated.
"Alright." He said filling two glasses. "I want to talk about Alison."
I rolled my eyes. "We already told you everything we knew about the night she disappeared."
"Maybe you did, but what about your friends?"
"As far as I know they told everything that happened that night."
He bit the inside of his cheek annoyed. "Fine. Now get on the bed."
"What?"
"Well I'm going to need some convincing that you are telling me truth." I should have gotten high before coming here. "Come on, I know you want it." He said as he threw me face first into the bed. "You're whore." He grunted as he pounded harshly into me. "My whore."
I buried my face into the pillow hoping to muffle my screams, I didn't even realize I had stopped breathing until I passed out.