..... How long has it been? Not that long. I could still see the light getting smaller and smaller as I flew further away. Well technically I was falling, but it felt like I was flying. It was like I could feel the gravity coming from the center of the Earth. Was that where I was going? Am I even going to land somewhere?
My back hit something and I bounced off of it, my sides and legs starting to hit and bounce off of things that were moving too fast for me to see as I flew. It reminded me of a green slide, and the board game snakes and ladders. Or is it spikes and ladders? I don't know it's been too long. They were supposed to make a horror movie about it I think...
My body including my head kept bouncing and hitting different parts of this black slide, I was starting to feel less so now. Like I was leaving reality and coming back. I started to feel more closed in and I started to feel a little scared, what's at the end of this slide?
I turned my head and looked down, I couldn't see anything below me and my head hit the closing in walls again.
This isn't how I wanted to die, if I will die that is. and if I do eventually reach the bottom I was definitely going to explode or something. But if the impact doesn't kill me, blood loss or starvation will.
I breathed in and out, trying to calm myself and be slow but my terrified lungs didn't let me. I took in another shaky breath and closed my eyes before letting out a yell that quickly turned into a scream. My body banging against the closing in walls sooner and sooner before I suddenly felt no more walls and my body fell against something wet and sticky.
My eyes were still closed and the scream ended with a loud grunt and groan that oddly echoed in the new area I was in. I felt my tears prick in my eyes and slowly falling out, mixing in with the unknown sticky substance I was now laying in.
I stayed still, for probably a minute or two, before realizing that I wasn't in any pain. The impact did nothing. I didn't want to open my eyes so I moved my legs around to get a guess of what I was laying in.
The sticky substance didn't stick to me but it was like it was following me. I hesitated to open my eyes but I did anyway, my vision being blurred from the terrified tears. I blinked and pushed my curls out of my face. My vision adjusted itself and widened at my unfamiliar surroundings.
The first thing I saw was grey, a specific dark shade of grey that was endless. I wasn't in a room because there were no corners, so I thought I was in a sphere before seeing these black lines like spider web and broken glass, they stretched out all over and we're all in different places. Stretching out as far as I could see and probably farther, like the grey was nothing and wherever the lines were coming from weren't going anywhere.
I lifted my head up and looked down at what I was laying in, I was on top of one of the black spider web lines. It was oddly wider than the other lines.
I repositioned myself so I could get up but froze as the sticky line got smaller. It confused me greatly and I furrowed my brow. I moved slowly as I got up, keeping an eye on the black line as it slowly shrunk down and got thinner and thinner till it met my feet.
I breathed in slowly and lifted a foot so I could take a step forward
"Don't be scared-"
I jumped and spun around, looking for where that child-like voice came from. I didn't see anything but the odd void behind me till I looked down and saw a small looking being.
It was like the small being was part of the sticky line, there was no color or something that would help me identify what she looked like exactly. She was like a droplet of black paint or slime in the shape of a- ... Of a....
"I don't remember my name, otherwise I'd introduce myself correctly. Do you remember your name?"
The little voice said, her pearls for eyes staring up at me. I knew what her shape reminded me of, but it had been so long since I've seen something in the shape of hers that I had completely forgotten what they were called. But yet, she didn't look like one of them.
"...J-" I coughed, it had been so long since I spoke to something else that could speak English. "Cover your face with your arm when you cough!" The little thing said almost sternly, I covered my mouth with my arm hallway through my cough till I was done.
"I'm sorry, that was rude. That's just one of the ways I remember being told to cover my mouth when I used to cough. I should've used the more polite way." She looked down and fidgeted with her fingers as she apologized, "That's quite alright little one, I forgot my tone of voice sometimes as well. I'm Jocelyn." The little girl looked up at my face, surprised by what I said. "Jocelyn?"
"That's right."
She stared silently as she processed my name. "... That's what everyone called me."
"Then that must be your name."
She got silent again before speaking "My nickname was Jossy, but I got mad because I wanted it to be Josie."
She looked down again as she rubbed her wrist with her hand. "But I wouldn't mind being called Jossy again..."
I started to feel sorry for the little girl, she must've not seen her parents in a while. "Jossy is a beautiful name. Where are your parents?"
"They were at home, I was at school, just like my siblings were." I wondered if she had a habit of going silent. I tilted my head to the side at her words, they were familiar but it was like their meaning had entirely left my dictionary.
"School? What is school?" I asked, the girl looked up at me again and I think she may have smiled. "It's a building that you go to like- REALLY EARLY in the morning almost every day! You go there to learn and meet other people, the food there isn't that great but it can be at some rare times." She giggled, "I'm not surprised you don't know what that is, you're one of the most beautiful unicorns I've ever seen! And the first!"
I smiled a little and thanked her. "Thank you young one, you are the first- ... Uhm-... Homo sapien I've seen in a while. Not many are as nice as you are."
"Homo Sapien? Like a gay snake?" She asked, "No-" I chuckled, "A Homo sapien Is... I'm sorry but what are you deary?"
"A human."
"That's right, a homo sapien is the scientific name for a human!" She made an 'oh' sound at what I said, "I was supposed to learn that soon in history class, I didn't get to though."
"And why is that?" I leaned down a little to get closer to her "Because before I could I ended up here." I stared at her and blinked. "And how long ago was that?" She shrugged her shoulders. "Did you fall into a whole in the ground like I did?" She gasped "You fell into a whole? And survived!? What was it like? What happened??"
"Not fun, I was terrified. Now please, answer my question."
"Oh yeah- no. I kinda just- POOFED! And I'm here. Like I remember fl- flickering here a few times like a light switch, but one day I was just here and-- yeah. Now I live here." I stared at the girl, feeling concerned. So there were different ways to get to this place, but was there a way out? I lifted my head up to put some space between us and looked back out into the grey void of black spider webs and glass.
"What is this place?"
"I wish I could tell you, none of us remember how exactly we got here. We just did." She looked out into the void with me.
"Us?" I looked back down at her. "Yeah, thankfully I'm not alone in this place. Look!" She pointed at one of the far away lines. I squinted my eyes and I could see something black moving slowly across one of the lines. "That's a human like me! HELLO!" She called out to the person, the person looked over and waved silently before continuing their slow walk. They were taller than the little girl.
"There're mostly kids like me that come here, but their can be a few older people here and then." She spoke as if this wasn't much of a problem. My concern just grew for her and the other people that are here. "How did the others get here? Do you know?" She shook her head but paused and nodded.
"Some of them said that they poofed here once and never left. Some say that it felt like they were in a scary ocean that grew more scarier before they got here. But we can all agree that we felt a new feeling before arriving."
"A feeling?" I sat myself down so I could get to her level. "Define this feeling." The girl looked at more and wrapped her arms around herself like a hug, she made small whining sound as she stopped smiling. "What's the matter? Do you not like the feeling?"
She stayed quiet and just looked more upset regarding that she barely had a face. "I don't wanna talk about it, it's scary!"
I know people can be afraid of many odd things, but I didn't know that included emotions till now. "I understand, I know how new emotions can feel for young children like you, but there's no need to be afraid of an emotion. It won't hurt you."
"But people can!"
"....But I'm not people."
She got silent again and stared at me. It felt a little awkward but I wasn't going to be embarrassed by a child's reaction. "I'm trying to think before I speak, I'm sorry for being so quiet." She said, letting go of her arms and fidgeting with her fingers again. "There's no need to apologize for having thoughts, if you need time to think then take all the time you need."
She seemed to have lit up a tad bit after I said that, it made me feel better and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.
"You're not at all like Celeste." She spoke, "Do you know her? Is it true that unicorns know everything?"
I smiled a little and answered "This Celeste sounds familiar, and for your question- ... We know just as much as a human mind does, maybe more, but not everything." Her shoulders slumped at my answer so I turned the direction of this conversation towards Celeste. The name was oddly familiar.
"Who is this Celeste you speak of?"
"Oh-" She started "I don't remember her real name but she preferred to be called her middle name, Celeste. She transferred to my school a while back and I was the first child to welcome her, or so she says. She's nice! A- at times..." I blinked, finally remembering who this Celeste was and how she affected me. It confused me how this girl knew of her, but that was a question I would figure out later.
"Jossy-"
"Yeah?" She blinked.
"Your friend, Celeste, isn't your friend." She visibly got confused. "Yes, she is. You don't know her!" She fussed. I remember acting like this a few times.
"I do know her. You ate lunch with her almost every day, you shared Language Arts and History with her, she made you feel like a fool on picture day because she said she'd match with you-"
"I am not a fool!" She blurted before pausing, I stayed quiet so she could have her moment to think. "What's a fool?" She asked, "How you felt that day." I answered which she asked again, "How do you know about this? Wh-what else do you know?" It looked like she was about to freak out as she took a few steps back.
I didn't move from my place.
"I know because she did the exact same things to me. She was bullying you, Jossy. She was using you like you were one of the toys your younger siblings would take and sometimes destroy without your consent."
"Consent?"
"Permission. Asking for something before giving or receiving."
She locked her hands together, even with her being a black blob of something or nothing, it was like I could see every emotion and doubt she was having.
"She was never your friend, and still isn't. You tried to help her in any way you could, but she never did the same."
"Yes she did-!" She blurted again "She helped me with our school projects and when that- that time we went to the mall and they messed up my order! She helped me then!"
"Yes, she did help those few times. Are there any other times she helped you?"
"She-! ...She-... Uhm." It was clear she wanted to prove her point, but I knew what she was going through. I lived her life in that time, and I knew all that would happen after.
I spoke again as she continued to ponder. "She told you that you were nothing without her."
She practically froze as she stared at the ground. "That's not what a friend should do nor say. But you accepted her bullying because you didn't want her to leave you like Madison did." Her eyes widened as she looked up at me, a mixture of sadness and fear and hatred in her eyes.
"GET AWAY FROM ME! GO! I-I-" She yelled at me. It surprised me but I sort've expected her to act this way. I stood up from the sticky string. "I DON'T LIKE UNICORNS ANYMORE! They're- they're mean! Leave- LEAVE! GO AWAY! YOU'RE JUST LIKE MOM!"
I stared at her for a few seconds as she continued to shout.
"... Unlike your father I will leave you alone, take up all the time and space you need from me. But your mother isn't a bad woman. She just wants to help you while she's still figuring things out on her own."
"NO!" She screamed, "She's an adult! She knows what she's doing like dad! They know what to do!"
I turned away from her and gave my final words to her before walking away. "Parents aren't always right."
I could hear her breathing heavily as I walked away from her, my ears twitched as her heard her let out a scream that echoed in the void before she cried hysterically. I was probably a few feet away from her before I stopped in my tracks. Listening to her cry and choke on her breaths. I turned my head to look back at her as she was now laying on the string, I couldn't see her pearly eyes as she looked like a blob now and continued to cry.
She was probably sitting or laying down.
"... Do you want me to come back and help you? Or do you still want me gone?" I asked, she continued to cry and didn't respond. I wondered if she heard me so I decided to repeat myself. But before I could say the first word she got up and ran towards me.
I jumped a little in surprise and didn't have much time to react as she ran up on me and hugged my back leg tightly. Her tears and snot getting on me. I felt a little disgusted by the feeling of it but brushed it off. I watched the girl as she continued to cry and squeeze my leg. "Do you want a hug?" I asked, she started to make some sniffling noises and continued to choke on her breath. She let go of my leg and crawled underneath me to get to the front.
Once she popped up in front of me, tears still pouring from her eyes that made her face droop, I leaned down a little and wrapped a front leg around her as she hugged my neck. Her black ooze finally sticking to me.
I forgot how doubtful and naive I once was.
But it still didn't make sense. She's like the past version of me and isn't at the same time.
The unicorn felt warm, because she's alive. I remember that feeling of being alive. She surprisingly felt similar to a horse, it's been a while since I touched a horse. I was told I looked pretty when I cried, I wonder if that's still the same.
"I'm sorry that you felt such things, I'm sorry that they frightened you. Making you do things you didn't want to." She said, she reminded me of those smart and mysterious characters you'd see in books or movies.
"But I did those things! I could've stood up for myself and not lied, h-how- how-" I got annoyed with myself, messing up my words made me feel stupid. "How could I not want to do those things if I did it anyway!?"
"You'd be surprised, many people do things regardless of wanting to or not. You are young and hopeful." She put her leg down but I didn't want to let go of her, not yet. "You are a child. Young ones or people that go through harsh things, can easily be lied to because they hope for light. And go towards the wrong people in hopes for that light. It's okay to be naive and easily swayed, you just wanted things to go back to the way they once were. But sometimes things proceed to be new. Or it's the same thing over and over again."
"I wish it was the same thing over and over..." I said, my face was probably red and puffy from crying so much. How could people look at me and say I'm pretty?
"No, you don't. You want good things to keep happening. You didn't want to be hurt, it's why you don't like the new and bad. But unfortunately we can't learn if bad doesn't happen." I felt seen hearing that, and if I ever was being honest it felt good being seen. She just knew everything and what to say, like she lived my life or observed from afar. Has she been observing me my whole life?
"... c'mon. Look at me." I looked up at the unicorn with my name as she looked down at me. I recognized her eyes, they were mine. My eyes that used to be chocolate brownie that turned orange in the sun. And yet without the sun, I knew they were mine. I'd stare at them everyday in the mirror. If I ever found a mirror in this place, I wonder what I looked like now.
"It'll take time to heal from the past and move on, but you will be okay in the end. Even if you may be tired of hearing it." She was right, I am tired of hearing it. But it also has been so long since I heard someone say that to me that it didn't bother me as much as it used to. For some reason I felt a little better after hearing that.
"Come on, let's get moving." I let go of the unicorn as she started to move, walking past me yet I followed close beside her.
"There's nowhere to go, you're stuck here just like the rest of us." She stopped moving, I felt a little uneasy when she stopped moving I rubbed the back of my hand. She turned her head a little but not all the way, like she was looking at me through my curly brown hair that was attached to her head.
"I have a theory I want to correct. This line and this void is endless is it not?" She asked, I thought for a second before nodding. She continued "Hm, then this may take awhile then. Come with me, I know we could both use the company." It was almost like a firework went off in me, of course I'll go with you!! She nodded before looking away and began walking again, I followed after her as we walked along the black line, the line moving and changing so we could both walk on it together.
It's trippy and can confuse you, sure confused me when I first got here, but it's easy to get used to. Besides it's not like you can fall off of it.
I tried that already.