Cooper wasn't talking to me. At least, not very much.
I picked him up so we could head to the restaurant together and wait for the girls, and he was pretty much acting like I didn't exist.
He dressed well, though. His trapper hat was gone for once, showing the shaggy, overgrown blonde hair that almost reached his shoulders. He was wearing a button-down white dress shirt, some black dress pants, and some loafers.
All in all, he looked...good. Really good.
I like to think I didn't look half bad either. Since I didn't know how fancy to go, I thought a sweater would be safe. I wore a black sweater along with some brown dress pants and black shoes. I tried to brush my hair back a bit, but I don't know how effective it was.
Cooper was on his phone, his free hand shoved in his pocket. Despite his nice appearance, he had a frown on his face that pretty much destroyed the entire look.
I tried to make small talk, but every time he'd brush me off with one-word answers.
I just don't get what his deal is. He makes me do shit he likes all the time, and getting out of the house would be good for him.
He still hasn't told me what's going on with his dad. I can't bring myself to push the issue, at least not right now. He's already pissed enough since I called him out on being jealous, no reason to rock the boat even further.
Noises from whatever game Cooper's playing filled the space, and I clicked my tongue in aggravation. "Can't you at least put it on mute?"
"I can do a lot of things, Gar. For example," Cooper smiled innocently before turning up the volume on his phone.
It took great restraint on my part not to scream or tackle him in that moment.
But my anger was soon forgotten as I turned my head to see Nina and Eleanor approaching.
And man, they looked incredible.
Nina was wearing a simple red dress that hung off her shoulders, as well as had thin straps going over her shoulders. Red heels with far too many straps complimented the attire, as well as lightly done makeup matching her red theme.
Eleanor was wearing a yellow dress with a black pashmina on top, along with golden makeup and yellow flats. She had dark skin and her hair was up in a nice braided bun. She also had on some gold bracelets that went well with her eyeshadow.
"Gray!" Nina greeted me happily, reaching out and taking my hand like it was natural. Maybe it was for her. It still threw me off a bit.
"Hey." I smiled, hoping my nerves didn't show. "You look amazing." She smiled warmly at me.
"Hi Cooper." Eleanor greeted shyly, fiddling with her hands rather anxiously.
But to my disbelief, Cooper briefly glanced at her before looking back at his phone. "Hey." He said distantly.
I could tell Eleanor was thrown off, but she shook it off and cleared her throat. "Um, should we head in?"
"Yeah, let's go," Nina insisted, heading for the entrance and pulling me along with her.
It took effort to not look back at Cooper. Maybe he was just nervous. Once we were seated and comfortable, maybe things would get better.
It did not get better.
Besides taking a moment to briefly look at the menu, Cooper refused to look away from his phone. Eleanor kept glancing at Nina and me, probably wondering what she should do, if anything.
I didn't know the answer.
But Nina, ever the angel, spoke up in hopes of breaking the ice. "Um, so Cooper, Eleanor here plays the flute. She's quite good at it as well," Eleanor smiled, looking a bit embarrassed. "You play piano, right?"
"Not by choice, and not anymore." Cooper muttered irritably, as if Nina was bothering him by merely speaking. "I took lessons when I was younger, and guess what? It was hell. I don't get why anybody would willingly try to learn to play an instrument. I mean, really, all you're doing is learning how to make more noise and tick everybody off."
I couldn't even stop my mouth from falling agape. I don't think I've ever heard Cooper talk like this in our entire friendship.
Eleanor's bottom lip quivered, and I could tell she was trying to keep it together, whether because she was hurt or angry, I couldn't tell.
"Oh...well, I mean, I think for some people it's like art, you know?" Nina chuckled awkwardly. "Just another way people like to express themselves."
"Yeah, nothing like opinions nobody else asked for." Cooper sassed.
Nina fell silent at that and then glanced at me expectantly.
Shit. I was supposed to do something, wasn't I? I should do something.
I coughed. "So, should we decide what to order? Um...I was thinking—"
A phone binged next to me and I looked over to see Cooper staring down at his phone with pure irritation, reading something.
Huffing, I leaned over to whisper to him. "Do you have to read that now?"
"I can't read a text?" He shot back quietly, raising an eyebrow at me as if I was being unreasonable.
"You're on a date." I hissed. "Turn off your phone."
"Oh yeah, or what?" He challenged.
My hands balled into fists. "Cooper—" I started in a low tone, trying not to lose my shit in public.
"Why don't we share something, Gray?" Nina spoke up suddenly, getting my attention. She smiled shyly. "We could get the lasagna—"
Cooper cut her off abruptly. "Gary doesn't eat lasagna. He thinks it's pizza but worse."
I did a double take at that, looking over at Cooper in disbelief. What the hell was he doing?
"Uh, okay," Nina shook her head, trying to get rid of her own shock. "How about minestrone—"
"It's too soup-like. Gary only eats soup when he's sick." Cooper cut her off rudely.
I glared at him. "What is wrong with you?" I asked him quietly.
But before he could give a reply, Eleanor spoke up hesitantly. "Um...if you don't mind me asking...why do you call him Gary? Isn't...Isn't his name Gray?" She questioned curiously.
A heavy silence took over the table, and I could already tell by the expression on Cooper's face that that was the last straw for him.
Cooper's phone buzzed at that moment, and he let out a small laugh. "Great timing." He muttered under his breath before getting out of his seat.
"Cooper." I tried to urge him to come back, but he completely ignored me and headed for the entrance.
I hesitantly looked back at the girls. "I am so sorry, do you mind—" Nina was already shaking her head, waving me off.
"Did I say something wrong? I didn't mean to—" Eleanor started anxiously.
I quickly got up from my seat. "Don't worry about it. He's just being an idiot. I'll be right back." With that, I scurried out of the restaurant to catch up with Cooper.
I found him outside, on his phone, texting, as if he wasn't just the biggest douche to walk the planet.
Anger fueling every bit of my being, I stormed over to him and ripped his phone out of his hand.
"Hey—" He started to protest. I shut his phone off.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" I hissed.
Cooper scoffed, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Why does something have to be wrong? I didn't like her. Sue me."
"You barely even spoke to her!" I exclaimed furiously. "And that shit with the name- it wasn't on purpose. Eleanor hasn't been in our classes. She wasn't there back in fourth grade, she doesn't know." I explained firmly.
"I don't care about that." Cooper snapped.
My hand that wasn't holding his phone balled into a fist. "Look...I get that the whole dating thing is pretty new to us and I don't think either of us expected me to get a girlfriend first," Cooper's eyes widened at me in what looked like genuine disbelief. "But that is no excuse to come here and treat Nina and Eleanor like shit. You don't get to take this stuff out on them, okay?" I snapped.
To my surprise, Cooper's face of surprise morphed into something of genuine anger. A face I wasn't used to at all. "So, should I take it out on you?"
"What?" I questioned, eyebrows furrowing.
Cooper huffed, refusing to look directly at me. "You shouldn't have made me come here."
"YOU AGREED TO IT!" I protested, jaw dropping at the fact that he was trying to make this my fault.
"YOU DIDN'T EXACTLY LEAVE ME MANY OPTIONS! Because God forbid your precious Nina not to get her way for once." He all but sneered.
My eyes widened.
Cooper ran a hand through his hair. "Did you even think for a second about my feelings, Gary? Did it even cross your mind that I would hate every bit of this stupid date?"
I frowned deeply. "If you hate it so much, then why did you even agree to come? You could've said no, you could've told me to buzz off, you could've talked to me instead of just slamming the door in my face!"
"I AGREED FOR YOU!" He shouted almost desperately, looking at me with wide, pleading eyes that left me a bit stunned.
"What are you...what are you talking about?" I asked, genuine confusion taking over any feelings of anger.
Cooper's shoulders slumped, and for a moment he looked defeated. Like he lost a battle I didn't even know he was having.
And then he spoke softly. "It's one thing to know you're seeing someone. It's a whole other to see it with my own eyes as my best friend falls in love."
My hands balled into fists. "Why are you so jealous of me!? You're my best friend, you're supposed to be happy for me that I found someone! The Cooper I know would be over the moon that I got a girlfriend, not some pathetic, jealous, idiot!"
"I'M NOT JEALOUS OF YOU!" He shouted viciously, hot, angry tears bubbling in his eyes.
"YES YOU ARE!" I protested in an instant. "YOU ARE SO JEALOUS THAT IT'S PATHETIC!"
"FINE!" He exclaimed, before his shoulders slumped and he looked at me defeated. "Fine. Okay. Okay, yeah, I...I am jealous."
I frowned deeply. "I know that—"
"No." Cooper huffed, clicking his tongue and pushing his head back as if trying to fight back his tears. He swiped an arm over his face. "Fuck." He hissed under his breath.
My eyebrows furrowed as I watched him, unsure of how to proceed.
"I wasn't...jealous of you, Gary." He admitted softly. I opened my mouth to protest again, only for him to continue. "I was jealous of Nina."
"I don't understand." I told him honestly, mind going blank at his words.
Cooper looked down with a bitter smile. "I get it, I mean, how could you know? If I never told you, then it makes sense." His smile faded. "I guess I was just hoping that with time...maybe you'd get it anyways."
I couldn't comprehend what he was saying. It was like alarm bells were going off in my brain, telling me to run before there was no turning back.
But my feet felt frozen to the ground, and I could only stand there as Cooper continued.
"Do you remember the day we met? In that shitty classroom, passing notes to each other and you were so awkward," Cooper chuckled tearfully at the memory. "So awkward, you didn't correct my dyslexic ass when I thought your note said your name was Gary instead of Gray."
My body was frozen in time, but I felt like my heart was going to burst out of my chest. A million questions rested on my tongue, and a million emotions rested in my soul.
Cooper was smiling at me, even as tears began to cascade down his cheeks.
It was so wrong. Why did this expression feel more genuine than any other face he's ever given in our whole friendship? This face of pain and heartbreak and longing.
Why was I the cause of it?
"You've always been there for me, Gary." He spoke softly, with nothing but pure adoration in his tone. Adoration directed at me. "How could I not fall in love with you?"
I didn't know if he wanted an actual answer or not, but either way, I couldn't bring myself to speak.
Cooper smiled at his shoes bitterly. "I always promised myself I would never tell you. That I would put our friendship first." He scoffed, shaking his head. "I can't believe I actually let my jealousy make me snap. Some best friend I turned out to be."
I opened my mouth, ready with a million protests, and yet somehow couldn't voice any of them.
I felt like I was drowning in my own emotions. Like they were filling my entire body until they were running out of my mouth like water, leaving me unable to breathe.
Cooper suddenly reached out and gently took his phone back from me. "...I know you love Nina. You've loved her since forever, and...I'm happy for you, I am." He spoke sincerely. "And I'm going to support you guys till the day I die." He let out a shaky breath, wiping at his eyes again. "But just for tonight... I can't. I can't just sit by and watch you slip away from me." His shoulders trembled.
I had the sudden urge to hug him. But for the first time since we met, I felt like I wasn't allowed to. Not when I was the reason he was hurting so badly.
He spoke through hiccups. "I-I'm not t-that s-strong, Gary...I d-don't know how anybody c-could be."
"Cooper..." I finally found my voice, reaching a hand out towards him to...I don't know. I don't know what I'm doing. Why don't I ever know what I'm doing?
Cooper stepped back out of my reach, biting down on his lip. "...Tomorrow...Tomorrow we'll pretend this didn't happen. We'll keep being friends, and you'll keep dating Nina and it will be okay. It will all be okay." His hands wouldn't stop shaking.
I wanted to reach out and grab them, to stop their trembling. But the moment I moved closer, he moved back. I stayed where I was. "Cooper—"
Cooper shook his head, pleading for me to stay silent. I complied.
And then he started to walk away, glancing at me briefly with tears beginning to dry on his cheeks. "...Bye, Gary."
And I couldn't do anything but watch him go.
I don't know how long I stood there, with a heart so heavy I thought I might collapse.
At some point, I went back into the restaurant, claiming Cooper wasn't feeling well and needed to go home.
The rest of the date passed in a blur. A forgettable, insignificant blur.