*Author's Note *
This one is for those who have been feeling down lately, for those who have been suffering mentally in silence and who feel like they have no one to talk to.
I know we all can't have an Anakin like this in our lives but I want you to know, for what it's worth, I am proud of each and everyone of you for getting through each day despite your struggles.
Y/N's POV:
I close my eyes and sigh as I stop before the screen to clock in for work, mentally preparing myself for another day. I wish I could say today would be better, but then I would be lying to myself. Same shit, different day, am I right?
"Y/N, can you please get started on this, now? I needed this done an hour ago." Your boss huffs as he walks past, probably to go hide so he doesn't have to help out.
"Yeah I will, I just gotta go out my stuff down, I just got here." I reply softly.
"Okay well hurry up, it's about to get busy." Boss rolls his eyes.
I take a deep breath and walk away to put my bag down, in avoidance of letting out what I really wanted to say. Being a cook was so great, running around trying to do everything all at the same time, with everyone yelling at you saying you're too slow, not doing enough when you're doing the job of four people because others have kept calling in because they're sick of being treated like crap. Only reason I still show up is because I need a paycheck so I can afford food on the table.
"Y/N, thank god you're here." Derek cries out as his eyes meet mine as I walk into the kitchen.
I smile as I pat his shoulder.
"I'm here, what would you like me to start with?" I ask, tying up my apron.
"The salads please." He pleads.
I nod as I make my way over to the preparation station to begin making the salads.
Derek and I are usually working together most days, suffering together. Running the show while the boss is off doing god knows what. We have built a close bond through having to deal with this on a daily basis together, we have become close friends. But he is leaving in a couple of months to venture elsewhere back on his home planet.
The business starts to pick up and it starts getting a lot more busier than we want it. So I speed walk out the back to ask the Boss for a hand.
"Hey, do you mind giving us a hand? We're getting slammed out there" I ask.
"I'm busy." He states, not once making eye contact. Watching what appears to be some comedy video on the hologram.
"You always are." I mutter under my breath.
"What was that?" He asks, looking up at me.
"Nothing, don't even worry." I respond with sarcasm laced in my voice.
I walk back out and start helping Derek get these orders made and sent out, he looks over at me.
"Let me guess? It was a 'I'm busy'?" He asks, mocking Boss' tone.
"Yep." I sigh.
We got through the busy period, barely. It was really rough, the poor people who were handing out the orders were being verbally abused because we were taking a lot longer than expected seeing as we should have had more people out here helping. It's just not fair.
The Boss walks out and looks around, crossing his arms over his chest.
"This place looks disgusting. You need to get it cleaned up immediately. I swear everytime I look around, all of you are always standing around. Doing nothing." He spat through his teeth.
I clench my jaw and ball my fists at my sides. Derek reaches over and grabs one of my clenched fists, leaning in and whispers.
"Don't say anything, it's not worth it." He whispers.
I sigh as I let my body relax, turning to look at him.
"I'm tired of putting up with this every single day, and I'm tired of watching everyone else deal with this too. We shouldn't have to." I say.
"I know. But until you find a better career, please try and hold your tongue." He pleads.
I look up into his pleading eyes, shrugging my shoulders and throwing my hands up.
"Fine, but only for a little while longer because believe me, I'm about to snap." I say.
The shift was ending and I honestly couldn't say I was even excited, because I would have to come back tomorrow and endure it all over again. I am excited that I get to see my boyfriend, Anakin, though. He's the only thing keeping me going at the moment.
As I arrive back to my apartment, he's already sitting there on the couch. He looks up and smiles at me, I only had the energy to give him a small smile as I drop my bag and keys onto the floor near the door. Anakin's stands up from the couch and walks over to me.
"Another rough day, huh?" He asks, cradling my face in his soft hands.
I close my eyes and lean in to his touch.
"Honestly, I don't even know what a normal day is at this point, so I would consider this normal." I admit.
Anakin sighs as he rubs my cheekbones with his thumbs.
"You can't keep going on like this, Y/N...it's burning you out. You're scaring me." He says softly.
My eyes open and look up into his worried gaze.
"What am I supposed to do Anakin? I've already tried to stand up for myself and I was made out to be the issue." I say, moving away from his hold.
Anakin sighs as he steps forward but I step back.
"I can't quit because I need money to live, this apartment doesn't pay for itself, neither does the food or electricity or water. There are very limited job openings available locally but even then it's offering less money and less hours so what is the point really?" I choke out, my eyes watering.
"Then what would you like to do?" Anakin asks.
"I don't know. But I am so sick to death of being treated like dirt. When I show up to work everyday and put my everything into each day, I work my ass off and I get absolutely nothing for it. Besides the paycheck. I get no please, no thank you's, no nothing. I could take a blaster in between the eyes for someone and they would still ridicule me for it, like I did it wrong or something. I'm just, I'm just tired Anakin. Do you know how much I dread waking up in the morning knowing I have to go back there?" I let out with tears streaming down my face.
Anakin's eyes become a little glossy as he takes my hands in his.
"Do you know how much it breaks my heart to hear all of this?" He whispers.
I look into his glossy eyes a a few tears escape his.
I know hearing all of this would be very overwhelming for him, but this has been bottled up inside of me for so long and I'm tired of hiding it.
"I'm sorry, I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to keep this all bottled up anymore." I say.
Anakin reaches up and wipes my tears away, he sighs as he doesn't break eye contact.
"Can I say something?" He asks cautiously.
I nod, urging him to continue.
"I have been able to sense for quite awhile now that something has been off, but I didn't want to push it so I didn't ask, I thought if you wanted me to know, you would tell me, which tonight you did. And I am glad you told me, but do you want to know what I think?" Anakin asks.
I sniffle as I continue staring into his dreamy blue eyes.
"What?" I ask softly.
"I think, you are the strongest woman I have ever met. You are my biggest inspiration, knowing now the bullshit you're going through, which there was no way you could've prepared for it...you still handled it. You have survived the worst days and here you are, still here, standing right in front of me. You are doing the absolute best you can each and every day, I have seen it, of course not knowing exactly what has been happening but there is never not a time when you are not doing your best. And after all this bullshit that shitty people keep putting you through...I am so fucking proud of you." Anakin explains, tears falling down his face as he smiles.
I bring my hand up to my mouth as I begin to cry.
"My baby." He whispers as he wraps his arms around me and pulls me into his chest, his finger stroking my hair as cry and let out all of my emotions.
"No one has ever said that to me before." I say with a shaky voice, looking up at him.
Anakin looks down at me, tilting his head.
"Said what?" He asks.
"That they're proud of me. I'm so used to always thinking I'm disappointing everyone." I admit.
He pushes some stray strands of hair behind my ear.
"You've never disappointed me, you never will. You have and always will, make me proud. And I am the luckiest man in the world." He smiles, bending down slightly to place a small soft kiss on my lips.
I smile, cradling his face in my hands.
"I love you." I sigh.
"I love you too." He smiles.