Hello. Here's the special entry love story of Ayen and CJ. More like, Cayen! Ansaveh? XD Ayoko namang mag end ang story na kawawa yung dalawa. Kaya heto't gumawa ako ng para sakanila. :) The Kathniel marriage is next chapter pa po. <3
para sa mga maka-CJ dyan, this is for you guys. <3
---------------
Ayen's POV
Last week ko pa sinend kay CJ yung invitation pero until now, wala parin akong respond na natatanggap. Maybe, he won't come. Maybe he can't leave Kath. Well, I can't blame him. He loves Kath so much and I can understand why. I can still remember the time that I've told him about my feelings for him..
*FLASHBACK*
Time setting: After Ayen let go of Daniel. Nung inaya siya ni CJ na mag date at lumabas sila. If you can guys still remember. XD
After weeks of getting to know each other, going out together, I can slowly realize how gentleman CJ is and how kind hearted he is. We were at the park that day....
"CJ, Thank you for bringing me here. This is my first time to be in a public park." then I smiled at him, and just my luck, he smiled back.
"You don't have to thank me, diba nga. Andito ako to secure if you are okay." huminto ako sa paglalakad and humarang ako sa harap niya. Nakita ko naman na nagulat siya sa ginawa ko.
"Why are you being so good to people? Why do you always want to make people secure and happy, when in the first place, you can't do it for yourself? You are so kind CJ. Super kind. And every girl can fall in love with you.." nakita kong ngumiti siya, then hinawakan niya ko sa magkabilang balikat. Nilapit niya pa yung mukha niya sa mukha ko, and stared straight to my eyes.
Yung mga tingin niya na yun, yung mga mata niya, I can see pain and hurt na hindi niya hinahayaang makita ng ibang tao. He maybe supportive, happy in the outside, but he is in deep pain in the inside.
"I like being good to people Ayen. I want to make a lot of people happy, because I know for myself the feeling of being not. Being not happy. You know what, I can feel you. Loving someone, who already loves someone else. Did you ever wonder why it's not a happy ever after for everyone? Kasi hindi pwede. May taong, para sa isang tao lang. Hindi pwedeng may kahati dahil may masasaktan. And what can you do about that? Learn to let go. Let go for that two person to be happy. And hindi ako naniniwala sa sinabi mong 'Every girl can fall in love with me' kasi kung totoo yun, bakit hanggang ngayon, hindi parin ako magawang mahalin ni Kath?"
Hinawakan ko yung mga pisngi niya nun. Nakikita ko kasi kung gano siya kalungkot sa mga sinabi niya. "Even though it's not a happy ever after for everyone, I believe that everyone deserves to be happy. You also deserve to be happy.." After he heard that, he just smiled at me.
After ng ilang araw na pag patuloy namin na paglabas, I'm starting to know him more. He's from a rich family. When I say rich, REALLY rich. They hold different kinds of businesses. From restaurants, hotels, to big companies. He has a brother named Matthew. Half brother niya lang yun and anak yun ng dad niya sa ibang girl. He told me that his dad is a womanizer. Well, siguro ng dahil sa sobrang rich nung dad niya, maraming girls na nasisilaw at pumapayag maging other woman. But his mother seems to be so kind na tinatanggap niya parin yung Daddy niya kahit ganun. She's also treating Matthew like her own son. Despite all the wealth that they have, his parents are both busy and he has no one to be with at home except their helpers.
Nalaman ko rin na hindi pa siya nagkaka girlfriend nun, dahil ayaw nya daw maging womanizer katulad ng Dad niya. Kaya nga raw nagalit siya sa sarili niya nung pumayag siya sa mga teammates niya sa pustahan. Pustahan na dapat mapasagot niya si Kath, para makapasok siya sa team. Sa sobrang guilt niya, prinomise niya sa sarili niya na gagawin niya lahat, para makabawi kay Kath.. until he fell in love with her.
"CJ, Why don't you have any ex-girlfriends?"
"Hmm.. Let's say, I don't want to have a girlfriend na hindi naman ako sure. I don't want to be a womanizer like my dad, Ayen. Gusto ko pag nagka girlfriend ako, yung totoo na. Yung mahal ko na talaga." pag tapos niyang sabihin yun, tumingin agad ako sakanya. I can see his face so serious. That's why I had the guts to ask...
"Did you already find her? I mean, the girl that you can see as your girlfriend."
He then smiled at me. "Yes, I did. Unfortunately, she already loves someone else." he sighed, then continued. "First time ko atang manligaw at ginawa yung 6 ways kay Kath. I dunno anything about courting a girl, so I just gave her material things like what girls would appreciate. Pero may natutunan ako sa 6 ways na yun. Not all the time, money can give you happiness. Don't you think.. If I exerted more effort, sakin sana napunta si Kath?"
tinignan ko lang siya ng matagal. Seryoso kasi siya tapos mukha pa siyang nasasaktan. I am starting to feel jealous and sad at the same time. And I can't explain why. Am I starting to like him? Why do I always feel this way whenever he is mentioning how much he loves Kath? I know what kind of person Kath is. Nung una, nasapawan ako ng galit ko ng dahil sa sobrang selos sakanila ni Daniel. Nasanay kasi ako na lahat ng gusto ko, nakukuha ko. I am kinda spoiled, but Kath taught me something. You can't get everything that you want, especially kung pag aari na yun ng iba.
She is a bubbly person, a cheerful one, and she's a brave girl. All the characteristics that I think I'm not. Well siguro dapat hindi na ko magtaka if both of them love her.
Isang araw, tumawag sakin yung parents ko na kailangan ko ng bumalik ulit sa Paris dahil namimiss na nila ko, and I miss them so much too. Sabi ko pag iisipan ko muna, simply because I can't leave CJ here alone. -__-
I went to his house, but he wasn't there. I waited for 5 hours then nalaman ko nalang na kasama niya pala si Kath kaya late na siya uuwi ngayon.
"Oh Ayen, I'm sorry. I didn't know you're here. Hinatid ko pa kasi si Kath. Kumain ka na? Gusto mo kumain muna?"
I went closer to him, then held his hand. "No. I need to tell you something."
"Sure. What is it?" He said while looking straight into my eyes.
"I have to.. I have to go."
By the time I said that, hinawakan niya rin yung kamay ko. "Common. You didn't tell me na kailangan mo na palang umuwi. Tara, hahatid na kita."
Hinihila niya na yung kamay ko, pero pinigilan ko siya. "Nope. That's not what I meant. I mean, I have to go. Go back to Paris.. for good."
Napatingin siya sakin ng tuwid, his gaze turned into a sad one. Then napabuntong hininga siya. "You are going to leave? Leave me.. for good?"
Nung marinig ko yung Leave me? bakit parang ayaw niyang iwan ko siya? Umaasa na naman ba ko? o talagang malulungkot siya if sakaling umalis ako?
"CJ, if you will tell me not to go.. then I won't go. You've always been there for someone, please let me be the one to be there for you."
"Ayen.." biglang nalungkot yung facial expression niya. Binitawan niya yung pagkakahawak sa kamay ko, then umupo siya sa sofa tapos yumuko. Nilagay niya yung mga palad niya sa mukha niya.
"Ayen... I promised Kath that I will always be there for her. She needs me. I'm sorry.. No matter how much I want to be with you, I just can't break a promise that I've made."
Lumapit ako sakanya and I removed his hands from his face. I gave him a smile, so he will think I am okay. "No, it's okay. Don't say sorry. Naiintindihan ko. One thing that you've taught me is to never push myself to someone who already loves someone else. Akala ko kay Daniel lang magiging applicable yun, pero sayo rin pala. I want you to be happy cj, and if being in Kath's side will make you happy, then I will go."
Naglakad na ko papunta sa main door nila, but before I leave, humarap pa ko sakanya. Naka upo parin siya dun at tulala. "Thank you for everything Cj."
Nag thank you ako sakanya kasi kung hindi dahil sakanya, siguro hanggang ngayon hindi ko parin matanggap na wala na si Daniel sakin. Siguro ngayon, kinakain parin ako ng galit ko kay Kath. Pero hindi na ganun ngayon. Because of CJ, lumawak yung pag iisip ko at mas tinanggap ko na lahat. There is no turning back, kasi masaya na si Daniel ngayon. At wala kong ibang magagawa kundi tanggapin yun.
After that night, I started packing my things. Habang inaayos ko mga gamit ko, nagtext si Daniel, inviting me to come over sa party ni Kath sa isang resort. I don't think I will be able to come dahil bukas na ng umaga yung flight ko. Kumuha ako ng dress and accessories sa mga shinopping ko kailan lang, then I wrapped it para may gift ako kay Kath. Para kahit dito manlang, makabawi ako sa lahat ng nagawa ko sakanya.
kumuha ako ng paper and nag pen tapos nag sulat ako ng sorry note.
"Kath, Sorry I can't attend to your party, I really had to go.
I'll live with my family at Paris again. I'm so clingy. I can't live alone.
I'm so happy for meeting you. Although I've been really a meanie at first.
Nung una, I've asked my self, what did Daniel and CJ see in you?
Then nung mas nakilala na kita, I finally understood why.
CJ likes you Kath. Trust me. He really does.
I do hope all the best for you! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Till we meet again. :)
- Ayen" (A/N: Nabasa to ni Kath, season 2 - Chapter 13)
Yeah. CJ really likes you Kath. Nakakalungkot lang isipin na, may gusto ko naring iba. kung hahayaan lang sana ako ni CJ na mahalin ko siya eh. Pero ganun naman diba? Kahit may mahal na yung taong mahal natin, we will continue being by their side.. na kahit iba na yung mahal nila, patuloy parin natin silang mamahalin. Why? Because we are waiting na baka someday, matutunan din nila tayong mahalin.
While writing my letter, naalala ko lahat ng pinuntahan namin ni Cj these past few weeks. We went to amusement parks, different kinds of simple restaurants, public parks, and he even exposed me in some charitable works. Kahit sandali lang kaming nag sama, marami akong natutunan.
Nung nasa charity kami, I realized that simple things can really make you happy. Being happy is not about how expensive your clothes are or how elegant you look like. Kelan ko naramdaman yung unang beses na maging sobrang saya? Yung makita ko yung bata sa loob ng charity na sobrang saya, dahil andun kami para dalawin at tulungan sila. From that day, sobrang nagpasalamat ako kay CJ na dinala niya ko dun. Kakaibang happiness yung mabibigay sayo pag nakita mo yung mga ngiti sa mga batang yun.
Pag punta ko kaya sa Paris, may makikilala pa kong parang si CJ? Na dadalhin ako sa mga lugar, na hindi ko pa napupuntahan?
..
.....
...........
................
The next day,
Late nako nagising ng dahil sa late nako natulog sa kakaisip kagabi. Narealize ko na ilang oras nalang, flight ko na. Hindi na ko makakadaan kay Kath to give my gift. In the first place, I dunno where she lives :(
After preparing my whole self, ready to go na ko and nagpahatid nako sa driver sa airport. I decided to text CJ, para makapag bye manlang.
To: CJ Alcantaras
' Hi. I'm on my way to the Airport. I just wanted to say thank you, for being there for me nung mga times na I'm sad because of Daniel. You really helped me in a good kind of way. Thank you din for making me realize that simple things can make a person happy. Because of the places that we've been through, nabawasan yung kikay side of me. :D
Take care and enjoy Kath's Birthday, tell her I can't come cause I really have to go. :(
Nung sinend ko yun sakanya, nasa loob na kami ng airport. Matagal ko pa kasing pinag isipan if isesend ko or what eh. nung naka upo na ko sa waiting area, sunod sunod yung messages na natatanggap ko.
From: CJ Alcantaras
' Please, wag ka muna umalis. Wait for me, I really have to tell you something.
From: CJ Alcantaras
' Ayen, I should be the one thanking you for letting me be a part of your life. For making you feel better, for making you happy, kasi ganun narin yung nararamdaman ko pag nakikita kitang masaya. Wait for me, please?
Nung mabasa ko yun, I can't help it. May mga tumulo nalang na tears from my eyes. For once, pupuntahan niya ko dito because he cares, hindi siya pupunta dito because he's obliged to do so. Pupunta siya, kasi choice niya yun.
Nakita ko sa sign na malapit na yung flight ko. Makaka abot pa kaya siya? Minutes had passed, pero wala parin siya. Hanggang sa tumayo nako and kinuha ko na yung hand carry bag ko. Malapit na kong pumasok sa boarding area, when I heard someone shouting my name.
"Ayen!!" that familiar voice. CJ's voice. Lumingon ako, and I saw him na hingal na hingal. Did he run? Nakiusap ako sa mga guards na lalabas lang ako sandali, and pinayagan naman nila ko.
lumapit ako sakanya, and I smiled. "H-hi? Glad to see you here."
Nung pagkasabi ko nun, niyakap niya ko agad. A hug so tight, na halos hindi na ko makahinga. This is what I need, after all the pain that I've felt these past few days, kailangan ko tong hug na to.
Suddenly, tears pricked my eyes again. "I'll miss you. Thank you for being here. Ikaw lang yung nagka time para ihatid ako dito. I think you should go, it's Kath's birthday. You can't be late."
"No, Ayen. I'm sorry for being insensitive about your feelings. Pag kasama kita, palagi nalang si Kath yung nababanggit ko. This day, kahit ngayon lang, gusto ko makabawi. Take care of yourself. I promise to go there after my graduation. My family's going to London, and I'll visit you in Paris. No matter how far we are from each other, think of me as someone who will always be there for you."
Pag tapos nun, kumalas na kami sa yakap. I tapped him on his shoulders. "Thank you, til we meet again." kinuha ko yung gift ko kay Kath na nasa loob ng bag ko, then inabot ko sakanya.
"This is my gift to Kath. Please give it to her, and tell her I'm really sorry for not saying goodbye. Tell her I wish the best of everything for her."
then we bid each other good bye.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
He is the type of person who keeps his promise. Binisita niya talaga ako dito sa Paris nung pumunta sila dito after nung graduation nila. Tinour ko siya dito. We went to the eiffel tower, and different places here in Paris. And kinailangan niyang bumalik ulit sa Philippines for his college, kaya sa pangalawang beses, nagpaalam ulit kami sa isa't isa.
I called him many times nung college na siya, I found out na umalis pala si Daniel and he went to United States. Kaya naging busy siya to comfort Kath. Halos hindi na siya nagka time para kamustahin manlang ako. Well, I understand. I've always been an option right? He loves someone else. Ang gulo diba? Si CJ, mahal si Kath. Si Kath, mahal si Daniel. Bakit ang gulo? Hindi ba pwedeng, I love CJ, and he loves me back? Love is really a complicated thing.
Hanggang ngayon, 7 years na ang nakalipas, wala na kong balita sakanya. I sent him an invitation for my first biggest fashion show here in Paris. My parents can't attend because they are really busy. I invited him, para kahit manlang isang tao, may pumunta para suportahan ako. Para kahit siya manlang, makita ko sa crowd habang naglalakad ako. Being a model is really my dream. Sana may isang tao manlang na andyan, para maging proud sakin. Para makita yung pinaghirapan kong marating.
But.. He's not even responding. Maybe, hanggang ngayon, mahal niya parin si Kath. And kahit kelan, hindi niya na ko magiging first choice.
Nandito na ko sa dressing room and minimake upan. Michael Cinco is the designer of my gown, and I'm so happy to be able to model his designs.
"vous êtes à côté, Ayen." (you are next, ayen. this is french! XD)
Nung sinabi yun nung assistant, tumayo na ko and pumunta nako sa backstage. This is it. This is what I've dreamt of.
"The last but not the least... The next designs are made by the Famous Filipino designer, Michael Cinco." I heard the emcee saying.
Nauna na yung mga ibang models na pumunta sa runway. Pang finale pa kasi ako lalabas at, habang nag aantay ako ng turn ko, nag ppray ako na sana maging okay lahat. Kahit wala ng nanonood saking friends ko, ayos lang. Wala naman akong magagawa.
Nung turn ko na, dahan dahan akong naglakad. Wearing my long, silver, elegant with full of diamonds gown. I'm also wearing my Christian Louboutin pumps shoes. Nag pose ako sa gitna, cameras are flashing and capturing my every move. Then nung patalikod na ko.. I heard someone singing from the background song.
-- PLAY MUSIC AT THE RIGHT (True - Cj Navato ) --
"I won't talk
I won't breathe
I won't move till you finally see
That you belong with me..
That voice. That familiar voice!
You might think I don't look
But deep inside
In the corner of my mind
I'm attached to you
I'm weak
It's true
Cause I'm afraid to know the answer
Do you want me too?
Cause my heart keeps falling faster
Tumalikod ulit ako to face the crowd, then suddenly, yung spotlight nakatutok sa lalaking paakyat sa stage. Carrying a bouquet and in a tuxedo. He is also holding a microphone while singing. That's CJ. CJ Alcantaras. He came.
I've waited all my life
To cross this line
To the only thing that's true
So I will not hide
It's time to try
Anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true
-- STOP THE SONG ---
Nung tuluyan na siyang umakyat sa stage, naiyak nalang ako. I can't help but cry. Siya yung taong andyan, when no one else is.
He kissed me on my forehead, then gave me the bouquet. "Sorry for my not-so-beautiful voice. Hahaha! I told you, that I'll always be here for you. You've waited long enough for me, can we still make it? Can we date again?" sunod sunod niyang tanong sakin.
Everyone in the crowd started clapping and shouting 'yes'. Even French people are shouting.
Tumingin ako kay CJ, his eyes are full of sincerity. Longing, and happiness. I wonder why, without any hesitations I said.. "We can still make it right? Let's give each other a second chance."
After that, he hugged me. Hugged me tight. "Thank you to those crew who let me sing. Please bear with my voice. Hahaha! I just wanted to make this girl, smile." sabi niya sa mga taong nasa paligid namin.
And after that day, he lived here in Paris with me. We also decided to go back to the Philippines for his business. He is a chief executive in different large companies in the Philippines, and he should be back there. And nalaman ko rin na Kath and Daniel's wedding is about to come....
and we are invited. (◕‿◕)
LATERS
------------
Next stop, Kath and Daniel's wedding na talaga! :D Thanks for reading this special entry. >:D< Love you readers.
Anyways, Happy Easter Sunday! <3
- Glimpseofsmile. ♥